The Heart Wants What It Wants
by BecomingScarlett
Summary: Lena Fawling was born and raised in La Push in a small house with both her parents and her 4 younger siblings. Embry Call is her long-term boyfriend, whom everyone believes she will marry someday. Paul Lahote is her idiot neighbor and sort-of friend. And then one day, quite suddenly, Paul is something more to her, and she doesn't know why. *Rating has changed from T to M*
1. Chapter 1

This was originally going to be titled The Inconveniences of Imprinting, but I decided last-minute to go with The Heart Wants What It Wants. I hope you guys like it :)

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Twilight. I can only lay claim on Lena and the rest of the Fawling family, as well as a few random friends. Whoever you don't recognize is made up by me, and all the rest are owned by Stephenie Meyer.

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**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

1\. The Way Things Were

"I can't believe I'm actually saying this…" Lena Fawling states as her dark brown eyes scan the sheet of paper in her hands for the third time in a row, "but…you passed! I mean, you actually aced it. There isn't even a single thing to correct." She pauses, finally glancing up at the boy she's been tutoring the past couple of weeks, "Wait a minute. Did you cheat?"

Lena notices he's staring down at his lap in mild interest, paying her absolutely no mind at all. "Paul," She calls for his attention, eyeing him suspiciously, "Are you even listening to me? What are you looking at?" She reaches across the table and snags his phone right out of his hand. Her eyes narrow in anger at the thought that he might have actually been cheating on his practice test right in front of her, when she's taking time out of her busy schedule to ensure he passes his final exams, but then she glances at the screen. Her cheeks heat up in embarrassment and she immediately places the phone on the table in front of its owner.

"Well, at least I know you weren't cheating," She notes in amusement, peeking across the table at Paul through thick eyelashes and wondering what his reaction will be.

Paul snorts, both at Lena's reaction to seeing a photo of one of _her _friend's in very little clothing, and at the notion that he'd found a way to cheat on a Geometry practice quiz she made for him. "Nope," He replies. "Does that mean I passed?"

"Ugh, you never listen to me," Lena complains, shaking her head. She reveals his quiz score for the second time, also showing him the worksheet for emphasis. "Yes, you passed. You got every answer right. I think you might actually understand Geometry now."

"Awesome," Paul sends his tutor a grateful smile, "My final for Geometry is on Monday. Hopefully I don't forget how to do all this shit by then."

"You won't forget," Lena insists, rolling her eyes. After all the hours she's spent going over Geometry theorems and equations with Paul, he better not forget what he learned in three days time. He came to her two weeks ago, begging her to help him study for finals otherwise he won't pass the 10th grade. First, she laughed in his face, because after all, that's what he'd have done to her. And what else are neighbors for except to make fun of them for your own amusement? But then she realized he'd never actually sincerely asked her for anything before, so she decided the nice thing to do would be try and help him.

Paul's cell vibrates loudly against the wooden kitchen table, and he casually picks it up. Before he has the chance to open the text message, Lena warns, "If that's Sera again, tell her to keep her damn pants on. We still have to go over the Biology practice before you can leave." She shudders at the thought that one of her best friends is currently sexting naughty pictures of herself to Paul Lahote. She knew Sera had a thing for Paul, but she didn't think she'd be inclined to send him pictures of herself in lacy purple lingerie. Where did she even get that from? And how did she have the guts to take picture like that in her parents' home? Sera Quinn's parents are really strict!

It wasn't a text from Sera this time, it was from Max. Paul groans, "Seriously, Lena? Come on, we can do your dumb science flashcards tomorrow. I told the guys I'd be home twenty minutes ago."

"First of all," Lena corrects, flipping her Biology book closed in the process, even though she had only just opened it, "Yes, I was being serious. Second, we have _work _tomorrow, and the last thing I want to do when I get out at 7 o'clock on Saturday night is wait around for you to finish working so we can study friggin' Biology. Third, why would you tell your friends you'd be home at five-thirty when you told me you were free to study until six?" She takes a breath, trying to calm herself down. She should know by now that Paul is totally unreliable, hence why he's failing three of his four major classes in school, and she shouldn't let herself get so worked up. It's not her problem if he has to repeat Grade 10. No one can say she didn't try and help him. And if he really wants to ditch the rest of his study session to hang out with his friends, then that's fine; it means she has more time to hang out with her boyfriend than she originally thought she'd have, and that's a definite positive.

"Sorry, I forgot," Paul shrugs, not seeming sorry at all. "And why can't we study at work? It's not going to be busy all day." It is _her _family's store, anyways. It's not like she's going to get in trouble. Saturday might be Fawling Market's busiest day, but there's still plenty of down-time.

She can see she's not winning this argument, so she gathers her notes and sticks them back in the blue folder she's been using specifically for studying for final exams. "Fine," She sighs, "Whatever. I don't really care." She stacks her Biology and then her Geometry books on top of the folder and gets to her feet. She's honestly surprised her siblings left her and Paul alone for as long as they have in the first place. Then again, tonight is Cody's second-to-last game of little league before the season ends, so maybe her mom took Camille and Maya with her to watch him play.

When she notices Paul hasn't moved from the table, she sends him a questioning look. "Can we still study on Sunday?" Paul wonders, looking semi-hopeful and also slightly guilty.

"I guess…" Lena answers slowly, "But besides Biology, what else is there to study for? You said you're getting a B in History, right?" Paul nods. "And you also said you're doing okay in English, so…?"

He winces, "Well…I _thought_ I was doing okay in English. Turns out that book I never read is going to be on the final, so…"

"What book?" Lena asks in alarm. They read five books this year, and all of them are going to be on the final. How did Paul get away with _not _reading one of the books when that was basically all they did and talked about in class for months at a time? She wants to reach out and shake some sense in her stupid neighbor, but she doesn't think it'll do him any good.

Paul waves away her disapproving frown as he murmurs, "Oh, you know, the King of the Flies, or whatever."

Lena internally groans. "The _Lord _of the Flies," She corrects impatiently. "Why didn't you read it?" Out of all the books they read this year, she'd have guessed that one would be a book that could actually hold Paul's interest. All the guys in her English period said it was their favorite read. It's about a group of English schoolboys whose plane crashes during World War II, and they have to learn to survive on their own, and basically the entire book is full of anarchy and violence! What's not to like? Did Paul seriously read Animal Farm and not Lord of the Flies? Lena doesn't understand.

"It looked stupid," Paul says.

"You're gonna look stupid, sitting with all the sophomores when the rest of your friends are juniors!" Lena loses her temper momentarily and yells at him. She adds, "Sorry. Just, try and read the book, okay? It's actually good. I think you'll like it. Give it a chance."

"There's no way I can read the whole book in four days," Paul remains pessimistic.

"You have to at least _try,_" Lena insists. "And don't use SparkNotes."

Upon glancing out the window over the kitchen sink and seeing three of Paul's jock friends loitering on his front porch, she suggests, "You should probably go. Dumb, Dumber, and Dumbest are waiting for you." In her head, she ponders if it should actually be 'Dumb, Dumber, and Dumber-er', since Paul's probably 'Dumbest'. She doesn't think the other three are flunking out of the 10th Grade.

"Oh, yeah," Paul says, finally rising to his feet and gathering his very few belongings from the table-top. "Well, thanks. See you tomorrow, Fish Sticks." Then, he's out the door and jogging across the Fawling's yard to his own.

_Fish Sticks? _Lena can't help but face-palm at the idiocy of that old nickname. Is he really still calling her that? They were eight-years-old when he made it up, and it wasn't funny then. So, she refused to eat anything but fish sticks for dinner until she was almost ten, what's wrong with that? Just because the saying goes, "You are what you eat," does not mean Paul had to _call _her what she ate. Although now, looking back on it...Lena chuckles. _It is kind of funny,_ she supposes. How did she survive on fish sticks for almost two years? And entrusting her secret with the idiot neighbor boy was clearly a mistake, as the nickname has lingered around for eight years now, but at least when Paul calls her Fish Sticks nowadays nobody knows what he's talking about. Nobody but Embry, and probably her cousin, River.

Now that her mind is on Embry, Lena pulls the cordless telephone off the wall and punches in her boyfriend's home phone number. It rings a few times before his mother answers, "Hello?"

"Hi Tiffany," Lena greets familiarly. "How are you?" She's known Tiffany Call since she was a baby, and the woman is like a second mother to her, especially since Lena's mother, Winona, and Tiffany are best friends.

"Hey Sweetie," Tiffany replies, sounding happy to hear from her, "I'm fine. I'm sure that's not why you called...?"

"You know I love talking to you, Tiffany," Lena says sweetly, "But I finished studying with Paul early, so I wanted to see if Embry could come over now. Is he home?"

"He's right here," Tiffany says, and then hands her son the phone. Embry puts it to his ear and says, "Hey."

"Hi," Lena smiles, feeling happier just hearing his voice. After a brief pause, she states, "Come over."

"Okay."

**.**

Lena hangs up the phone, still smiling, because that's what she always loved most about Embry. He doesn't ask questions, doesn't argue, just wants to see her as much as she wants to see him, always. They never grow tired of each other. For as long as she's known Embry, and that's basically forever, they've never argued or disagreed about anything. They were always smiling when they were together. Literally everyone who knew them thought they'd stay together throughout high school and beyond, one day getting married and having babies of their own. Their own mothers thought it would happen, and eagerly anticipated the day.

The only problem is that was the way things used to be...and things aren't that way anymore.

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Author's Note: What do you think? I'm not sure I even like the end, but I didn't want the first chapter to be too long. More on Lena and her family will be explained next chapter. It's going to get much, much better from here, I can promise that. I've been playing this story out in my mind for months now. I may even post another chapter tonight. But it will most likely end up being tomorrow since I just started it.

Please Review! Any feedback is much appreciated :)


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 2! Also, thanks to those who decided to follow, and even favorite the story. I got three really lovely reviews from: WriteAndDream23, Seldomlaughs, &amp; Lapushwolfpack, so I want to give you a really big thank-you! Your comments are much appreciated :)

DISCLAIMER: Like I said before, Twilight is owned by Stephenie Meyer. I probably don't need to say this, but I will anyways: I also don't own The Lord of the Flies, which was written by William Golding and is mentioned in this chapter as well as the last.

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**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**2\. Hot and Cold**

Simon and Winona Fawling opened Fawling Market in April of 1990, the same year their first daughter was born. It is the only supermarket in La Push, and for all 16 years it has been in business it has been mainly-run by family. Currently, there are only two employees who don't bear the Fawling surname; Leah Clearwater and Paul Lahote.

Lena works at the Market five days a week, Friday and Sunday being her only days off. She doesn't mind it most days, but Saturdays are definitely the best days since she works with Leah, Paul, and her Aunt Shayna. It's busy since Saturdays are when most people come in to buy their groceries, but even during the slow times they find ways to make the day go by faster.

"Did you start the book?" Lena demands the moment Paul walks in for his shift at 2pm. She's been at the Market since 11am and stayed up late re-reading her notes for the Lord of the Flies so that she could start going over them with Paul.

"I thought we were doing Biology today?" Paul asks, looking dumbfounded.

"I'll take that as a 'no'," Lena says, shoulders slumping. She wonders why she even bothered wasting her time. Clearly Paul isn't going to read the damn book. His English final is Wednesday, and he's going to be working the rest of the day today, plus half the day tomorrow. It doesn't leave him much time for reading.

"I read the first chapter," Paul confesses, "That's all I had time for. But I didn't expect you to be quizzing me on it already."

Lena sends him a skeptical look over the top of her register, not sure she believes him or not. "Name the first two characters mentioned in chapter one," She challenges, "And then I won't talk about the book again today. We'll just do the Biology flashcards."

Paul thinks it over for a moment, and then surprises Lena when he answers, "Ralph, Piggy, _and _Jack." Then he shrugs and adds, "I just read it before I came in."

"You better find time to read more before tomorrow afternoon," Lena warns him, "Or you are going to have a really hard time passing your test. I hope you've been studying the science notes I gave you..."

Paul narrows his eyes at the shorter brunette as he comments, "I'm starting to regret asking you to tutor me."

Lena smiles, returning, "I'm starting to regret accepting." She knows he's only joking. No one else will tutor his temperamental ass.

"Paul," Shayna Fawling calls from the back of the Market, "I need you at the deli station!"

After Paul walks away, Leah clears her throat, drawing Lena's attention. She raises a cynical eyebrow, asking, "What was _that _all about?"

Leah Clearwater graduated high school last year, and she'll be twenty come October, so she and Lena don't share many mutual friends. They know each other because La Push is a small town, and nearly everyone knows everyone. Plus, Leah's been working at Fawling Market since she graduated, and Lena started around the same time, since her parents decided 15 was old enough to work at the family grocery store. Aside from those reasons, Lena's brother Forrest, who is 10-months younger, is best friend's with Leah's brother Seth, so it would be pretty much impossible for the two girls not to be friendly with one another. Despite the age difference, Lena really likes Leah; she's not sure the older girl feels the same way, but that could be because Leah's long-time boyfriend Sam just broke up with her and she's heartbroken.

"Oh," Lena jabs her thumb over her shoulder in the direction Paul just walked, "That. I'm helping Paul study for finals."

Leah pulls a face, "Why would you want to do that?" Leah's never hidden her impatience for Paul; something about him just rubs her the wrong way, but their constant bickering is amusing to Lena.

"Because," Lena laughs, "He was very persistent, and it was just easier to say yes." That's not entirely true, though. Paul only asked once, but it was sincere, and she could tell he was desperate. She didn't want to say no. Maybe she thinks that doing him this favor will make him more likely to return the favor sometime; like, say, if she wants a night off from work during the week and there's no one else to cover her shift.

"I'd kill him," Leah states bluntly, just as a customer walks down her lane to check-out with her grocery items. Leah pastes a false smile on her face and greets, "Good afternoon. Did you find everything you needed?" Lena has to turn away to hide her smile upon seeing the bewildered customer's expression.

For the next hour and a half, a steady flow of customers keeps Lena and Leah busy on their registers, but by 4pm the market has a lull in the crowd. Lena decides to ask her aunt if she can steal Paul from the deli for a little while, so they can study some science flashcards, and Shayna gives the okay, as long as they agree to do cart returns and straighten up the aisles while they're talking. Surprisingly, Paul seems happy to get away from the deli, which is usually his favorite duty on Saturdays, since Sundays he's stuck in the back most of the day accepting deliveries and stocking the walk-in freezer and the meat locker.

"Okay," Lena says once she and Paul have taken a breath of fresh air outside, "Let's start with something easy." She walks to a cluster of carts on one side of the parking lot and begins to push them back towards the store front, while Paul gathers the ones on the other side of the lot. "What do plants synthesis their protein from?"

"What, no multiple choice?" Paul asks, only half-joking.

Lena rolls her eyes before supplying him with four options, "Starch, sugar, amino acids, or fatty acids?" Some might call her a brainiac, but the truth is she just has a great memory. She is able to memorize facts and easily remember them, making tests and quizzes a breeze. It doesn't mean she's a know-it-all, because she's far from it. In actuality, science and math are her two least favorite subjects, but that only motivates her more to understand the concepts, so she doesn't have to spend more time with it than she needs to. Helping Paul with Geometry and Biology has been difficult for her, but she's invested at this point in ensuring he gets a passing grade.

"Uh..." Paul wracks his brain for the correct answer, finally taking a guess, "Amino acids?"

"Is that a question or an answer?" Lena asks, shoving the row of carts in their proper lane just outside the Market's doors.

"Is it right or wrong?" Paul counters with another question. He, too, pushes the stray carts back into the metal lane where they belong.

"Amino acids is correct," Lena replies, "But you have to be sure of your answer. If you second-guess yourself then you're more likely to get it wrong." She moves on to another question, staying on the topic of plants for a moment, since it was the first topic they discussed at the beginning of the year. "Plants absorb most of the water they need through their what? And I'm not giving you choices this time."

"The...root hairs?" Paul answers slowly, still seeming unsure of himself. Lena nods encouragingly and he raises his eyebrows in surprise. "I was right?"

"Yes!" Lena is pretty pleased with herself. Last week he got all these questions wrong, but now he's getting them right. He actually learned something from their study sessions, and after yesterday's successful Geometry practice, she's feeling good about Paul's chances at moving on to Grade 11 with her and the rest of their class. "Now, tell me what influences plant development."

"Light," Paul says simply.

"Yes, but what about light?" Lena prompts.

Paul tries to recall exactly what Lena wrote in her notes, and elaborates, "Quantity, quality, and duration of light."

Lena claps her hands together and smiles, "You sound so smart right now."

Paul doesn't take her compliment the way she meant it. He scowls, "You're such a bitch."

"What? I was being serious!"

"Why? Because I usually sound like a dumbass?" Paul huffs and re-enters the Market without a backward glance.

Lena follows, insisting, "No, Paul. That's not what I meant." She sighs when he doesn't slow down, and since his legs are a lot longer, he's too far away now for her to keep yelling after him. She doesn't want to give her family's store a bad reputation for having immature teenagers running the cash registers. Besides, when Paul gets mad about something it's best to just let him cool off. It's annoying, but Lena is used to it by now. His mood can change as quick as the weather.

"Oh no," Leah says mockingly as she watches Paul stomp off to the back of the store like a grumpy toddler, "Did something upset the princess again?"

Thankfully, there are more customers waiting to check-out, so Lena is able to hop back on her register and help Leah. It distracts her momentarily from Paul's bad mood. By the time she's free again, Paul is ready to resume studying. Lena decides not to comment any further on how much he's learned in such a short amount of time, since he's clearly incapable of taking a compliment. She focuses on the different parts of a cell, animals and their classifications, how habitats affect animals, and important elements of the periodic table. Paul gets most of the answers correct, and Lena tells him as long as he keeps looking at the study sheets she made for him, he should do fine on his test. He may even do as well as she, but Lena doesn't tell him that.

"Lena, it's after seven," Shayna reminds her niece when she sees her still lingering around the store after her shift has ended.

"I know," Lena replies, "I'm just waiting for Embry."

"Does that dweeb still pick you up on his bicycle?" Leah asks casually. Lately, that's a casual question to ask, for her. She used to be much sweeter, but ever since that Sam Uley guy broke up with her a few weeks ago, she's been almost as moody as Paul.

Speaking of Paul, he practically chokes on his laughter at Leah's jab towards Embry. Lena sends him a glare and comments, "I don't know what you're laughing at, Paul. You've been bragging about that crap truck your dad gave you for your birthday and you've never even driven it once." This time, it's Leah cracking up at Lena's feisty come-back. Lena turns her eyes on the other teen in the room and informs her, "Yes, Embry does pick me up on his bike sometimes, but I think it's sweet. I do live right down the street."

"I told you my truck will be ready and running next week," Paul says in objection, forgetting whatever it is Lena just said about Embry and his stupid bike.

"Ha! You've been saying that since April," Lena reminds him.

"Oh, shut up," Paul grumbles, "See if I give you a ride anywhere now."

"Lena," Leah cuts in, motioning to the door of the Market, "Your ride is here." She and Paul laugh again when they notice Embry really is on his bike.

Lena feels her heartbeat quicken and her stomach turn over in excitement. A smile stretches across her face, and she tosses a wave over her shoulder to her two co-workers on her way out the door. "Have fun closing tonight, you two."

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Author's Note: Another pretty short chapter, but I'm getting to the good stuff. Next chapter should be up tomorrow or so.

Please Review! Your comments are always appreciated :)


	3. Chapter 3

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 3! I was happy to see a few new followers added, so welcome, and thanks to those who favorited this fic.

To my reviewers last chapter: WriteAndDream23, Guest &amp; another Guest - Thank-you! Your comments are super appreciated :)

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**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**3\. Here's Hoping We Collide**

Since Sunday is her one day of freedom during the school year, Lena almost always spends the majority of her day off with Embry. Today is no different than any other Sunday, so after she's woken up and had her morning run, she goes straight to Embry's, where they have breakfast together with Tiffany before heading outside to take a walk down to the beach. They talk about how excited they are for the last few days of school, since summer equals more time off for Lena, and therefore more time they can spend with one another. The hours pass quickly when they are together, even if they aren't doing anything more than talking. Their time is cut short today, though, when Lena realizes she has to get home so she can meet Paul for their study-date.

"Study-date, huh?" Embry repeats Lena's words, teasing his girlfriend, "Should I be jealous?"

"Hmm…maybe," Lena plays along, "If me spending the next couple of hours discussing major plot themes and hidden symbols in The Lord of The Flies is the kind of thing that turns you on…" She wiggles her eyebrows at him as a smile tugs on her lips, "Then, yes, you should be very jealous."

"Well then, I definitely am," Embry decides. Lena's dark eyes jump up to his in surprise. Embry elaborates, "Lena, I'd happily listen to you talk about anything for hours. Paul doesn't realize he's got the smartest," Embry leans in and kisses Lena on the cheek before continuing, "Sweetest," He places another kiss on her opposite cheek, "Sexiest tutor in all of La Push." He concludes with a final kiss, this one on her perfect pink lips.

Lena feels her cheeks warm at the compliment, and she kisses him back earnestly. "I don't know about all that," Lena argues half-heartedly, "But I'm glad you think so."

"I do," Embry confirms as he takes her hand and tugs her in the direction of his house. "Come on, I'll see if my mom will let me drive you home. It looks like it's going to start raining."

**.**

Embry was right about the rain. As soon as Lena got safely inside her home, the clouds opened up and unleashed a downpour. Unlike Friday afternoon, when Lena and Paul had the house to themselves to study, the entire Fawling family is generally home on Sundays. Aside from it being Lena's day off from work, it is her parents' day off too, and Winona likes the whole family to sit down to dinner together since they don't get a chance to do so any other day during the week.

"Lena?" Winona calls from the kitchen, "Is that you?"

After kicking off her sneakers at the front door, Lena strolls down the hall towards the kitchen, "Yeah, it's me."

Once Winona sees her daughter standing in the doorway, she points to the sink full of dirty dishes and asks, "Did you forget to do something when you got home from work last night?"

"What?" Lena asks in confusion, her heart sinking when she realizes she's going to be blamed for yet another chore her brother never got to. "No, I didn't forget. It was Forrest's turn." He always finds a way to get out of doing his chores, usually by passing them off to his older sister, and for some annoying reason, their mother always sides with him.

"He said it was your turn," Winona reveals, "And I don't have time to argue. I need to get dinner started. Can you please do them now?"

"Can't Cammie do it?" Lena queries, glancing at the clock on the wall. "I'm supposed to be studying for finals. Paul's going to be here any minute."

Winona sighs, "Camille is at the Market with your father. He's training her on the cash register so she can put in a few hours this summer. She wants to start a savings account."

_Great, _Lena thinks to herself as she rolls up her sleeves and approaches the sink, _Forrest did it again. _The only day her brother works is Sundays, and he always leaves his Saturday chores for Lena because he knows their mother will make her do them. Now Cammie is going to be working too, and she's not even thirteen yet! Lena wonders when her nine-year-old brother, Cody, and her eight-year-old sister, Maya, will be employees of Fawling Market as well. Soon, there will be nowhere Lena can escape to get away from her family.

"Thank you," Winona states when she sees her daughter has obeyed her request.

By the time she's finished doing the dishes Lena begins to think Paul isn't coming over to study. He should have been here by now. He's been out of work for almost three hours…

_Ding-dong._

"I'll get it!" Cody yells from the den, leaping off the couch and running for the front door.

Winona pauses in peeling the potatoes and gives Lena a warning, "I don't want you and that boy in your room with the door closed."

"Mom," Lena groans, "Oh my gosh." She shakes her head in embarrassment, so glad that Paul isn't in the room yet. "You're crazy." What would make her say such a thing? She doesn't tell Lena to keep her door open when Embry is over, but now that it's _Paul _coming over she has something to worry about?

"Lena, I mean it," Winona emphasizes, "Door _open_."

"Okay," Lena concedes, "It will be."

"Paul's here!" Cody yells again as he runs back to the den, hoping his little sister didn't steal the remote while he was gone and change the TV channel. Sure enough, she had. "Maya, I was watching that!"

Lena pops her head into the hall and waves to Paul, motioning for him to follow her up the stairs since they clearly can't study in the den where her siblings are bickering, and she has no desire to study in the kitchen, where they'll only be in her mother's way. She's still puzzled by her mom's odd request, but she does leave the door open when she and Paul step inside her room. She had already laid out her copy of Lord of the Flies and her English notebook this morning, so she'd be prepared.

"Sorry I'm late," Paul explains as he takes a seat on top of Lena's purple and red floral comforter, almost like he'd sat there a thousand times before when this is actually the first time Lena can think of that he's been in her room; maybe a few times when they were kids, "I was trying to finish the chapter I was on."

"Where did you leave off?" Lena asks curiously.

"I just finished chapter three," Paul answers, waiting for the inevitable moment where Lena tells him he's an idiot and he should be half-way done with the book by now.

Only she doesn't say that. "That's good," She says instead. "I think there are only twelve chapters, so you should be able to finish before Wednesday."

Lena sits down on her bed next to Paul and opens up her notebook, turning to the page where her notes for the Lord of the Flies begin. She asks Paul to summarize what happened in the first three chapters he read. He is hesitant to do so at first, since he doesn't understand why she wants him to tell _her; _doesn't she remember? But then Lena explains that most of the questions on the English final are going to be open-ended, so he'll have to supply the answer himself.

After Paul gives Lena a decent summary of chapters one through three, she begins explaining to him the underlying theme of the book and what certain characters and objects represent; things their teacher talked about in class which Paul either didn't pay any attention to or just didn't understand since he wasn't reading the book. "In the beginning of the very first chapter, Piggy and Ralph find the conch shell, remember? And Piggy tells Ralph to use it as a makeshift trumpet, to gather the rest of the boys on the beach. The conch becomes a major symbol in the book, of civilization and order. Ralph, the protagonist of book, becomes a leader to the boys, and he is also seen as a symbol for civilization. His main focus is getting the boys to work together so they can get rescued. Jack, on the other hand, is the opposite of Ralph. He wanted to be the leader of the group, and he represents the desire for power and anarchy. That's really the main theme: civilization versus savagery; law versus anarchy; order versus chaos." Lena glances up to see if Paul has any questions, and she's surprised to see him taking notes.

"I didn't think Jack was so bad," Paul says when he stops writing.

"Just wait," Lena says suspensefully, "You'll see."

"What about this 'beast'?" Paul queries.

"I can't tell you yet," Lena tells him, "You have to read more before we can talk about the Beast."

Paul flips open his book to chapter four and demands, "Just tell me what happens."

"I can't just tell you what happens," Lena opens her own book to the same page, looking down at the words as she talks, "It's not the same as you reading it yourself."

"Come on," Paul complains, "Get to the good stuff. This chapter is boring already, I can tell just from reading the first sentence."

Lena laughs, finding it funny that Paul would ask her to 'get to the good stuff' and be referring to a _book._ "Okay, fine," Lena agrees, "This chapter starts out pretty boring. But then, the hunters finally kill a pig, and it gets interesting..." She tells him a detailed summary of the parts she's skipping, especially the important parts, and reads a couple quotes directly from the book so he doesn't miss anything that might be on the final. They get through chapter four pretty quick, and move on to chapter five.

Lena would never have guessed an hour and a half had passed if Camille hadn't come to her doorway and announced, "Mom wants you to come down for dinner now. She says Paul can stay if he wants," signifying the time as 6:30pm. Sunday dinner is always at 6:30 on the dot.

"Okay Cammie, be right down," Lena replies. She turns to Paul and asks, "Are you hungry?"

"It depends," Paul jokes, "What's for dinner? Fish sticks?"

"Ha ha, very funny," Lena rolls her eyes. "Not fish sticks. I'm pretty sure it's meatloaf and potatoes."

Paul smiles, "Sounds good."

* * *

Author's Note: I haven't written in third person in so long, it felt a little weird at first, but I hope I'm doing all right. I thought it'd be the best POV for the way I want to write this story. It'll be a few more chapters before Paul actually phases for the first time, so I hope you'll really get to see the relationship between him and Lena _before _it all changes.

I hope to update again either tomorrow or Friday, depending on how soon I finish the next chapter.

Please Review! Your comments are always appreciated :)


	4. Chapter 4

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 4! I was happy to see a few more followers added :) Thanks to twilight85fan and the few guests who reviewed, it was very kind of you to take the time to leave your feedback

Hope you guys like this chapter!

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**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**4\. You're the, You're the Best**

"Hey Lena," River Horn greets her cousin as she heads in the direction of her locker after the first day of final exams. She finds it strange to see her lingering just outside the doorway of Mr. Begay's classroom, since Lena is usually the first one out the door so she can meet up with Embry Call, her boyfriend. "What are you waiting for?"

Lena peels her eyes away from the small window in the door and smiles at River, "Hey. I'm waiting for Paul." She glances in the classroom again, where she can see Paul's back as he watches their teacher grade his exam. Usually, final exam scores aren't revealed until report cards are sent out at the end of the month, but since Paul is failing so many classes his teachers have made him an exception to the rule; he'll find out by Wednesday, after his last exam, if he's scored high enough to move on to 11th Grade next year, or if he's stuck repeating 10th Grade. "I want to see if he passed."

River nods in understanding, already having known about Lena tutoring Paul. "How did your exams go? You had Geometry today too, right?"

"Yeah," Lena confirms, "I had English this morning, and then Geometry. I think I did pretty well. I finished the English exam with ten minutes to spare. I skipped a few of the Geometry problems though, so I'll probably get a B. We'll see. How'd you do?"

"Well, not to toot my own horn or anything, but I'm pretty sure I'll get an A on both," River explains, "The Biology exam was cake, and you know me and math, so Trig was even easier." River has always been advanced in math. She's taking Trigonometry this year, with the 11th graders, and next year she'll be taking Pre-Calculus.

"That's great," Lena congratulates.

River steps closer to Lena and asks her in a quiet voice, so she's not overheard by the many other students milling about the math hallway, "Have you talked to Sera since Friday?"

"No," Lena replies, "But if it has to do with Paul, I think I already know what you're going to say." She recalls the racy photo their mutual friend sent to Paul last Friday.

"Did Kim tell you?" River asks, seeming disappointed that she didn't get to break the news to her cousin.

Lena gives the other brunette an incredulous look, "Does Kim gossip?" She pauses before answering her own question, "No. I didn't hear it from Kim. Paul was over on Friday and I took his phone from him because I thought he was looking up answers while we were studying. He wasn't. He was actually just staring at a picture that Sera sent him of her…in her underwear."

River gasps loudly, leading Lena to believe she hadn't known the whole story, and she just opened her big mouth and revealed a giant secret of Sera's. "She did _not! _I can't believe she didn't tell me. I'm going to slap that little hussy when I see her."

"No," Lena urges, grabbing River by her shoulders and looking her right in the eyes, "You can't say anything. I thought you knew. What were you going to tell me?"

"Just that she and Paul are going out this weekend," River shares, "But now I know _why. _How could he not ask her out after seeing her ta-tas? They are _huge._"

"River," Lena warns, noticing that she is not keeping her voice down at all, and this would be a very embarrassing topic for someone to overhear them discussing.

"Good to know."

Lena's eyes widen at the sound of his voice, and she and River spin around to see that Paul has finished talking with Mr. B. and is standing directly behind them. And he's wearing his signature smirk. So obviously both girls know he heard everything they just said about their good friend Sera Quinn. River covers her mouth with her hand, but it's too late. There's no taking back what she's said now.

"I gotta go," River mumbles and basically runs away from her cousin and Paul, in the direction of her locker, which is where she was headed in the first place, before she ran into Lena and decided to see what she was up to.

Lena can't run, since she had an actual reason to be waiting around for Paul, so she rolls her eyes at her cousin's behavior. Deciding to ignore the awkwardness hanging in the air, she prompts, "So? How'd you do?"

"Huh?" Paul is confused by what she means, since his thoughts are now on that sexy photo of Sera. He never thought she was that hot before he saw her half-naked, but now he's not sure how he missed it before. She's smokin'. And it's even more of a turn on that he didn't have to ask for the picture. Sera decided all on her own to send it to him.

"Uh, the _test_," Lena reminds him impatiently.

"Oh!" _Duh! _Paul thinks, _Obviously that's what she wants to know. _"I passed. Got a 91!"

"Paul, that's awesome," Lena says, beaming at him. She knew he'd do well. She starts to walk down the hall, away from Mr. B.'s Geometry classroom, and Paul walks along-side her. "I'm really happy for you."

Paul nods, "Yeah, so one down and two to go."

"Don't you mean 'two down and four to go'?" Lena asks, wondering how Paul could forget they have two more exams tomorrow and then the last two on Wednesday.

"I'm not worried about two of them," Paul says, "Just Biology and English."

"It will be fine," Lena reassures him, "You're going to do great."

Paul sighs, "I hope so."

**.**

Wednesday, after the second exam, La Push High is filled to the brim with excited students, all looking forward to the prospect of an entire summer away from this place. Technically, school is done for the year, and all that's left is to clean out their lockers and return their books to the proper classroom. Some students did this early, like Lena, so they wouldn't have to stay a minute longer than necessary at the school. Although, in Lena's case, she is still hanging around, because she wants to see if Paul passed the English final. He got an 87 on his Biology final yesterday, which was enough to pull his grade for the year up to a 69, and even though that is technically a D, it's passing. For English, he needs to get at least a 90 to bring his grade up to a passing score, so Lena is practically biting her nails in anticipation.

"Relax," Embry says soothingly, pulling her hand away from her mouth and holding it gently in his own, "It's going to be fine. Besides, there's nothing you can do for him now. He either passed or he didn't."

Embry offered to wait with Lena today, since it's the last day of school and they made plans to go to lunch together before Lena's shift at the Market starts. She is grateful to have her boyfriend around to remind her that the results of Paul's exams are completely out of her hands. Chewing her nails down to nothing will not help him get a passing score. It's just that she wants him to do well, because she feels responsible. They were up until almost eleven last night talking about Lord of the Flies, and if he doesn't pass the exam Lena will feel like it's all her fault.

"Here he comes," Embry says, turning Lena in the direction of the English classroom Paul just exited.

Lena doesn't realize she's holding her breath until Paul grins and announces, "I passed! I'm officially no longer a sophomore," and then Lena releases it all at once.

She's a little embarrassed at how excited she is for somebody else to have passed an exam, especially since it's Paul, so she says the first thing that pops into her head. "Leah is going to be so mad. She really wanted to make fun of you this summer for having to repeat a grade."

In his head, Paul curses Leah for being such a bitch, but he doesn't share his thoughts, for once. "I wanted to say..." He tells Lena, "Sorry if I was a pain in your ass the past couple weeks. Thanks for helping me out. I couldn't have done it without you."

Lena is so stunned that she doesn't know what to say. Paul just apologized for being annoying? And thanked her? Is it possible she is dreaming? "You're welcome," Lena finally says, smiling as his comment sinks in. "I'm glad I could help." Now that the pressure is off, she can finally feel the excitement of the last day of school buzzing through the halls, and she is excited too. No school for eleven whole weeks, and it's her birthday in 3 days. She's been looking forward to this for months.

Paul looks to Embry, who had been standing quietly this whole time next to Lena, and tips his head to the side, waiting for the boyfriend to play his part. He talked to Embry last Friday at school about doing something for Lena if he passed all his exams. Embry didn't seem into the idea at first, but then he told Paul it was Lena's 16th birthday Saturday and he hadn't been able to think of a good gift for her yet. Paul suggested they put their money together to do something really cool for Lena's birthday, and Embry agreed to the terms. Embry's eyes widen and he slips his bag off his back so he can reach into the front pocket for the tickets he and Paul bought for Lena.

Lena catches the look exchanged between Embry and Paul, who are by no means friends, and eyes them suspiciously. "What are you two up to?"

Embry blinks innocently, while Paul admits, "We...got you something."

"You," Lena questions, "As in the two of you, together?" _What is going on? _Embry and Paul have literally never hung out. Ever. They don't even have one mutual friend, aside from Lena. And most of the time, Lena doesn't consider she and Paul friends so much as neighbors who happen to work together. They're friendly, but not necessarily _friends._ Or maybe they are, and she just never knew that's what Paul thought of them as?

"Yes," Embry confirms with a nod, "Both of us. It's like a joint birthday gift slash a thank-you from Paul for, you know, helping him pass his classes." He has managed to keep the tickets hidden still, for the moment, but he can tell Lena is curious to know what her surprise is. "You're not an easy person to shop for," He admits, hoping Paul won't take credit for the whole thing, even though it was his idea.

"It was my suggestion," Paul states, and Embry internally groans that the other male just said the exact thing he was hoping he wouldn't, "So hopefully you aren't disappointed." It wasn't Paul's intention to out-shine Embry, though. He was actually hoping to save Embry some embarrassment if it turns out Lena hates the gift.

"Well?" Lena looks between the two of them expectantly, "What is it?"

Embry finally reveals the tickets; a four-pack to the upcoming Music &amp; Arts festival in Seattle. Lena reaches out and takes them from his hand, holding them closer to her face to read the words printed in big block lettering. "No way!" Lena enthuses, "Bumbershoot! I've been wanting to go to this festival for years. How did you know?" She throws her arms around Paul, who is at least five inches taller, and hugs him briefly before attacking Embry with a giant bear hug and a few smooches on his warm cheeks.

Paul shrugs in total disbelief, "I didn't. It was just a wild guess that you might be into that kind of thing." He wasn't expecting Lena to be so excited, or for that hug, but he's happy she's happy.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" The pretty brunette chants, unable to keep the smile off her face. She glances at the festival tickets again, noting that there are four, and since Paul and Embry paid for them they're both most likely expecting to come with her, which is fine. She knows they'll have a good time. "Who's the fourth ticket for?" Then, she realizes it's on Sunday, and she wonders aloud, "How are we going to get there? Don't you have to work?" The last question was directed towards Paul.

"I asked for the day off," Paul says, "And I'm going to drive. My truck will be ready by then."

"You're sure about that?" Lena asks skeptically.

Paul gives Lena a warning look, "I told you, it will be ready." After a pause, he claims, "The fourth ticket is for Sera. I already asked her if she'd come."

Embry can't believe Paul would do something like that without asking Lena first. "What'd you do that for?" He frowns, "What if Lena wanted to ask Kim, or River to come with us?"

Embry doesn't usually get angry, but he will if he thinks his girlfriend is being treated unfairly. Lena diffuses the situation quickly, knowing how hot-headed Paul can get and not wanting to see the boys get into a fight, by saying, "No, that's cool. Sera will love Bumbershoot, as long as her parents agree to let her go. Kim wouldn't be able to get permission so last minute, and River doesn't like the long drive to Seattle, so I would have asked Sera anyways." She smiles reassuringly at Embry, silently letting him know she really is okay with the decision. "It's going to be so much fun."

"Yeah, it will be," Embry agrees, taking one of Lena's hands in his.

Suddenly, there's a loud whistle from down the hall, and it pulls all three of their attention in its direction. "Let's go!" Max Jacobs, the whistler and Paul's friend, yells, "We've been waiting on your ass for twenty minutes!"

Paul laughs, flipping Max the bird. "I guess I'll see you both on Sunday," He says as he starts to walk away, and then he remembers, "Actually, I'll see you at work." He points to Lena, "And thanks again. You're the best." Then he waves to Embry and jogs down the hall to catch up with his friends.

Once Paul is out of earshot, Embry questions, "Are you sure you're okay with Paul inviting Sera?"

"Yeah," Lena nods, "I want her to come. I meant what I said, Em. It's going to be the best day no matter what," she leans into his chest, "because you're going to be there with me." Embry smiles and pecks her on the lips. "Let's go get some lunch now," Lena suggests, "I'm starving."

* * *

Please Review! Your comments are always appreciated :)

FYI: Bumbershoot is a real Music &amp; Arts Festival that occurs in Seattle annually, according to Google. Just throwing that out there. I didn't make up the name, and what's to follow in the next chapter at the Festival is totally made up and not based on anything to do with the actual Bumbershoot festival. I just thought the name was cool :)


	5. Chapter 5

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 5! Sorry it took me almost a week to update. I really wanted to get it up a few days ago, but I had a hard time finishing this one. I had an idea where I wanted it to go when I started it, but I really couldn't get there. I did finish it though, it's over 1,000 words longer than the last chapter, and I hope you guys enjoy it!

I'm so thankful for the reviews from: SuckerForDelena, mukewarm, and the 2 guest reviewers! Your feedback is so appreciated, thanks a lot :) I was asked if this is going to be Paul/Lena, and yes, just for clarification, it is. Also, I was asked to describe Lena a bit more, so I tried to do that this chapter.

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**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**5\. I'm Glad You Came**

"I forgot why we never have sleepovers at your house..." Sera Quinn comments as she enters Lena's tiny bedroom and glances at the full-size bed that's pressed against the wall and the two and a half feet of space that separates the bed from the oak dresser, matching oval-shaped mirror hanging above. There's barely enough room beside the bed for the night stand, which has a lamp and a few books stacked orderly on top. Sera places her overnight bag on top of Lena's neatly made bed and jokes, "I hope you don't snore."

Lena just laughs, not warranting her friend with a response. She's slept over Sera's house, since she has a much bigger bedroom, at least ten times in the past year alone and if she did snore she's pretty sure Sera would have noticed by now. She does, however, point out, "Hey, at least we're not sharing with my sisters."

Camille shares a bedroom with Maya, and Forrest shares with Cody. Since Lena is the oldest, she gets her own room, even if it is the smallest one in the house. It's her own personal space, with lavender walls, her favorite color, a cork board full of pictures hung on the wall to the right of her bed, one window to the left her bed, and another window right above the headboard. It's not much, but she loves it.

"Oh, I think I found another reason your room isn't so bad," Sera comments as she leans across the bed to get a better view of the house next door, which she can barely see since it's dark outside, "You can totally see Paul's house from here."

Lena rolls her eyes, "Yep. Actually," She points to the back corner of the Lahote house, "That's Paul's room right there."

"Really?" Sera sits on the bed as she asks, "You think he's home right now?"

"No, he's still at work," Lena says. He works until 10pm every Saturday. "But don't worry, you'll get to see him all day tomorrow," She reminds Sera with a smirk. She thinks her crush on Paul is amusing. She just hopes Sera doesn't get in over her head, because Paul doesn't really _do_ relationships, and Lena doesn't want to see her friend get hurt.

"I know," Sera smiles, "I can't wait!" She jumps up and reaches for her bag, announcing, "Oh, I almost forgot. I have something for you." She unzips the corner of her hot pink overnight bag and reveals a little wrapped box with a gold bow on top. "Happy birthday!"

Lena takes the present and starts to unwrap it while stating, "You didn't have to get me something, Ser." Once the teal blue wrapping paper is off, she realizes it is a cardboard jewelry box. She opens it up and spots a pair of silver earrings in the shape of music notes. "Aw, these are so cute. Thank you so much." She really wasn't expecting anything from Sera, so it was a nice surprise.

"I thought you'd like them," Sera says, watching Lena take out her current earrings to try on the new ones.

"I do," Lena assures her, "I'll wear them tomorrow."

"What time are we leaving?" Sera wonders, twisting her long, chestnut brown hair into a braid out of boredom. Lena doesn't have a TV in her room, and her younger siblings are using the one in the den, so there's really else to do except for talk.

Lena yawns into her hand, feeling kind of bad that she's too tired from work to be an entertaining host at the moment. "Uh..." She has to think about it before recalling, "I think Embry said he'd be here at 9 so that we can leave."

Sera nods, "Cool."She glances at the clock for the fourth time since entering the room.

"Come on, it's time for Cody and Maya to go to bed, so let's see if we can get the TV for a little while," Lena says, heading for the door. Sera gets to her feet and follows. "Do you want some cake? There's still some leftover from earlier. It's chocolate with vanilla icing."

"Mm, okay."

**.**

At twenty of 9am on Sunday morning, Lena is waiting outside of the upstairs bathroom door for Sera to come out so that she can take a shower. She might have her own bedroom, but she does not have her own bathroom. All five of the Fawling children share the main bathroom in the house for showering, and it makes for a very hectic morning during the school year. Simon and Winona have their own shower in their bathroom, inside the master bedroom, which is actually located downstairs, but they don't let the kids use their shower. There is one more bathroom in the house, but it's a half-bath off the kitchen and only has a toilet and a sink. Most of the time, before school let out for the summer, Lena was up early enough to take the first shower of the day. Last night, though, Sera kept Lena up until after midnight talking and watching TV, so she had a much harder time waking up this morning. She also missed out on her morning run, so she doesn't feel as energized as usual.

Lena knocks, for the third time, and questions, "Sera, are you almost done?"

Time is ticking away, and at this rate she's going to be standing in the hall in her pajamas when Embry arrives and hold up their departure. She didn't foresee Sera taking such a long shower when she offered her to go first. If she'd known she'd be in there thirty minutes, she would have gone first and been downstairs preparing something for the four of them to eat for breakfast on the road. She might have to run next door, like she does on school mornings when she's running late and the bathroom is occupied, and ask to use the Lahote's shower. It's not the greatest, since Paul lives with only his father and men aren't known for keeping the cleanest bathroom, but it's better than not taking a shower at all.

"I'll be out in..." Sera's reply comes, muffled from the running water and the closed bathroom door, "five more minutes."

Lena sighs silently, multiplying Sera's answer by three, since she already said fifteen minutes ago that she'd be out in five minutes, and makes her decision. "Okay," She calls over the noise of the shower, "I'm going next door. I'll be back in ten minutes." And she means ten minutes.

Opening the door to the closet directly beside the bathroom, Lena grabs the small purple shower caddy from the third shelf from the bottom. Inside is a spare loofa, and travel-sized bottles of coconut-scented body wash, shampoo and conditioner, all of which are half-full since she brings them to Paul's each time she has to shower over there. She also picks up a folded bath towel and tucks it under her arm to bring with her next door. She makes one last stop, in her bedroom, to grab the outfit Sera helped pick out for the day, before descending the staircase and leaving via the side door in the kitchen.

Lena knocks on the Lahote's front door, since the doorbell hasn't been in working order for at least two years now, and waits. It is opened a few moments later by Paul, who has a piece of toast hanging half inside of his mouth. He sees the shower items before he asks any questions, so he already knows what she's here for. He steps aside so she can enter the home and then he swings the door shut.

"Thanks," Lena says as she walks away from him, down the hall towards both Paul's bedroom and the bathroom where the shower is located, "Sera's been in mine for at least forty minutes now."

She's already inside the bathroom and closing the door before Paul can reply, so he just puts the rest of his toast inside of his mouth rather than commenting on her being the only girl he knows that can be in and out of the bathroom in twenty minutes and still look great. Then again, not many girls have showered at his house, so he doesn't know how long it takes all of them to get ready in the morning. The girls that typically come knocking on Paul's door have already showered at their own homes and are coming to do something else that doesn't require clothing and is a lot more fun. Lena's the only girl who comes over to use him for his shower rather than his body. He laughs about that as he returns to his eggs, which he's eating straight from the pan he fried them up in. Why dirty something else he'll have to wash is kind of what Paul's thinking when he does this.

True to her word, Lena is showered, dressed, and on her way back home in exactly ten minutes. Paul is outside now, checking on his truck since he only got it working yesterday and the last thing he wants to happen is to break-down on the way to or from Seattle. "I'm going to see how much longer until Sera's ready to go." Paul waves a hand to signify he heard her.

Inside, Lena takes the stairs two at a time to get up to her room, where she finds Sera has finally emerged from the bathroom and is using the mirror above Lena's dresser to do her makeup in. "Hey!" Sera beams brightly, her hazel eyes wide and dramatic due to the significant amount of black liquid eyeliner and mascara she has already applied. She dabs a bit of fuchsia-colored lip gloss on her otherwise pale lips and then turns to face Lena fully. She wonders, "How do I look?" She puts her hands on her hips and strikes a pose to show off her fuchsia spaghetti-strapped romper with a deep v-neck, short-sleeved jean jacket and chunky purple-beaded necklace completing the look.

"Gorgeous," Lena compliments, and then she notices Sera's choice of four-inch sandal wedges. "Oh, your feet are going to hate you if you wear those shoes though. Do you want to borrow a pair of flip flops instead?"

"Nah, I'll be fine," Sera decides, "These match my outfit. Plus, if they hurt, I'll just take them off. What shoes are you wearing?"

Lena opens her closet and views her choices. "Uh...these ones," Lena says as she bends to pick up the black high-top sneakers she got for Christmas that she's only worn a few times. She slips them on her feet and ties up the laces before stepping back to look at her entire outfit in the full-length mirror that is hanging on the inside of her closet door. The dark denim, high-waisted shorts were a gift from Kim, who gave them to her on Friday night, since she knew she wouldn't get a chance to on Lena's actual birthday. The unique part about the shorts is that they were custom made from a shop in Port Angeles, and the back pockets were replaced with a black fabric covered in a red and white rose pattern. Lena paired the shorts with a maroon-colored crop top blouse that has a scoop neck and three-quarter sleeves. She also plans on bringing the vintage, zip-up bomber jacket her cousin River bought her for her birthday. Lena figured out that Kim and River went shopping together went she saw that the vintage floral jacket is made of the same material as the back pockets of her custom shorts. She's still wearing the music note earrings Sera gave her last night, and she decides to put a long chained, silver necklace with an owl charm on as well. She closes the closet door and announces, "There. Done."

"You look cute," Sera comments. "Are you leaving your hair braided?" She motions to Lena's long black braid which is hanging over her left shoulder.

"No," Lena shake her head. "I'm just waiting for it to dry. Then I'm going to take it out."

"Is that how you get your hair wavy?" Sera teases, "I know your secret now! I love when your hair is like that."

"Thanks." Lena thinks she hears a knock on the front door, so she says, "I think Embry's here."

"Your mom will let him in." Sera guides Lena over to the dresser and states, "I'm going to do your makeup."

"You are?" Lena asks skeptically. It isn't that she doesn't believe Sera, just that she's not sure she wants Sera to do her makeup. She usually wears little to no makeup, but it is a special occasion today, so she supposes she can make an exception. "Fine, just don't go too heavy on the eyeliner."

"I won't," Sera promises.

**.**

Fifteen minutes after Embry's arrival, the girls finally come downstairs, ready to leave for Seattle. Paul has been waiting impatiently outside, wondering what could possibly be going on in there that could take twenty minutes. He assumed when Embry went _in_ that he would bring Lena and Sera _out_, not keep him waiting. He's starting to wonder why he even offered to drive three and a half hours away to a music festival he's not even sure he'll enjoy, but then the three people he's waiting on step outside. _Finally, _he thinks to himself. When he sees Sera, he's not disappointed. She looks hot, especially since she's showing off her long tan legs. Her low-cut top also gives a nice view of her cleavage, which is bouncing with each step that she takes towards him. She smiles when she catches him staring and he returns with an approving smirk.

Lena checks her little black backpack to ensure the tickets are safely inside and then enthuses, "I'm so excited. Let's go!" She also packed a blanket to spread out and sit on, and $100 since she heard festival food and drinks can get pricey and she might want to buy herself a souvenir T-shirt or something. And, just before she walked out of the house, her dad gave her a new digital camera, and that went into the backpack too.

Lena is so happy to be getting out of La Push for the day that she barely even notices she and Embry are cramped in the back seat of Paul's truck on bucket seats that unfold from the sides...until her butt falls asleep, that is. It is also strange because she and Embry are facing each other, rather than looking forward out of the windshield, and Lena doesn't recall ever sitting like this on a long trip before. She hopes it doesn't make her feel sick. She kind of regrets not accepting Paul's offer to sit up front with him, since this trip is for her birthday. She saw the disappointment on Sera's face at the mention that she may be stuck in the back with Embry, rather than up front with Paul, so Lena declined his offer.

"You look really pretty," Embry mouths to Lena when he catches her eye. She blushes and mouths back, "Thank you."

Lena decides that being stuck in the back seat with her boyfriend isn't so bad, even if it does mean her ass is going to be asleep another three hours.

Thankfully, Paul's truck makes it to Seattle in one piece and he smiles smugly at Lena once he parks and lets her out of the back, since she kept insisting the whole way there was a strange noise coming from the truck and she thought it was going to break down. He loves it when he's right and she's wrong. She is actually happy to be wrong this time, though, since it would have been truly disappointing to have broken down on the way to Bumbershoot. She stretches her stiff legs and back before tugging out the hair tie from the end of her braid and shaking loose her hair. She uses her fingers to arrange the long, dark waves of hair around her face and shoulders, and during this time Paul wonders why she looks so different.

"Lena, look at you," Paul points out once he's figured it out himself, "You're wearing makeup."

Lena raises her eyebrows and counters, "And your point is? I wear makeup...sometimes."

Paul shrugs and comments innocently, "You look nice."

"Thanks!" Sera calls from the other side of the truck before skipping over to stand between Paul and Lena, telling him, "I did it for her." She wraps her arm around Paul's possessively. She never realized how close Paul and Lena were before today, and she doesn't like how jealous it makes her. She knows it shouldn't, because Lena and Embry are so disgustingly in love they never even look at someone from the opposite sex, but listening to Paul and Lena banter like old friends practically the whole ride from La Push really got on her nerves. Lena never even talks about Paul; why all of a sudden is it like they've been friends all along and nobody even knew it?

Embry takes Lena by the hand and the four teens start walking towards the entrance of the music and arts festival. The event started at ten this morning, but it doesn't end until close to midnight, and for June in Seattle they have an absolutely perfect day; the sky is blue and it's about 72 degrees. Once waiting in a short line, Lena hands over the tickets, they each get a stamp on the back of their hand, and then they're free to roam the festival field for the rest of the day. There are two stages on opposite sides of the field, a band playing on one of stages while another sets up on the other stage, so that music is being played all day long without pause. In between the stages are booths selling merchandise, showcasing paintings and other artworks, craft activities like tie-dying and face painting, and tons of different food stands.

"Do you want to go see what there is for lunch?" Lena asks, directing her question towards everyone in their little group.

"Yeah, I could eat," Paul is quick to agree since the smell of delicious foods are bombarding his senses.

Embry nods, "Sounds good to me."

Sera doesn't feel like eating as a group, though. She thinks it's time for her to spend a little time away from Lena and Embry, so she can have Paul to herself. So she waits until they have chosen a food stand to check out before stating, "I kind of want to see what's over there," she points to a food stand a few rows away, "so why don't we split up and eat? We'll meet up again after."

"Oh," Lena blinks in surprise, "Okay, I guess." She didn't think they'd be splitting up at all. "See you in a little bit..."

"Okay, bye!" Sera waves dramatically as she tugs Paul away from the other couple, "Have fun!"

Lena frowns as she watches Sera bounce happily away with Paul, "...You too." She turns to Embry and asks, "Is it just me or was she trying to get away from us?"

"I don't know," Embry replies, "I wouldn't take it personally, Lena. She probably just wants to spend time alone with Paul."

"That's true," Lena agrees, "I think she really likes him. She wouldn't stop talking about him last night." Lena chews on her lip as she remembers, "I didn't ask them if they had their phones on. What if we can't get a hold of them?"

"You think _Paul _and _Sera_ don't have their phones on them?" Embry shoots his girlfriend an amused look as he concludes, "I wouldn't worry about that."

Lena laughs at her minor freak-out. "You're right," She sighs, "Let's just eat. Do you want something from here? I think the pulled pork sliders sound really good, and some sweet potato fries. What do you want?"

"Sausage, pepper and onion sandwich sounds pretty good," Embry decides. Lena pulls a face at his selection, since she's not a fan of peppers or onions, but she doesn't say anything. They place their order and receive their food in under five minutes. Then, they grab a seat at a vacant picnic table, placing their shared soda between them, and spend the next few minutes quietly eating their food while listening to the music from the closest stage.

"This is nice," Lena comments after she finishes her meal, "I'm so glad we're here."

* * *

Author's Note: Whew! I don't know why this chapter was so hard for me to write, but it was being very stubborn. I wanted to start and finish the day at Bumbershoot in this chapter, but it just didn't happen. I hope you guys like it anyways! Next chapter will be up far sooner than this one, hopefully by tomorrow.

Please Review! Your comments are always appreciated :) Especially since this chapter was so hard to write, I could really use the feedback.


	6. Chapter 6

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 6! This chapter also came slower to me, much like last chapter, but I finished it sooner than last time, and it's actually even longer than that last, so I hope you guys enjoy :)

To my 6 reviewers last chapter: Black is the New Gold, WriteAndDream23, Guest, SuckerForDelena, twilight85fan, &amp; Guest, thank you so much! I truly appreciate your comments, they put a huge smile on my face! :)

* * *

**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**6\. Dosed**

_Hey Sera, what are you guys up to?_

Lena looks at the text she's typed up for almost a full minute before hitting send. She and Embry have been separated from Sera and Paul since they walked through the entrance gates nearly four hours ago now. Lena has already sent Sera two texts and called her two times, and all were ignored. She's starting to get a little annoyed, which sucks because she and Embry found a great spot to spread out their blanket and watch My Goodness' performance, one of Lena's favorite local bands from Seattle, and she can't really enjoy it since she's worrying about her friend. Embry tried to distract her, which worked for a couple hours; they browsed the art booths, tie-dyed t-shirts together, shared a cinnamon funnel cake, watched Death Cab for Cutie's performance, and walked around a _lot. _Eventually, though, Lena couldn't hide her annoyance at being ditched by Paul and Sera.

"What the Hell are they doing?" Lena wonders aloud when Sera doesn't reply to her text right away. She's picturing her friend kidnapped, or dead, or maybe just hooking up with Paul in the bed of his truck; she's not sure and it's all equally frustrating. She knows she's being ridiculous and Paul and Sera are probably fine, but she thought they'd all be spending the day together, not apart. "The least they could do is answer and just tell me what they're doing. That's all I want to know." She turns to look at her boyfriend and asks, "Am I being crazy?"

"No," Embry assures her, "You're not. This is why I asked you if you really wanted Sera to come. Kim or River would have stayed with you the whole time, Lena. Sera's selfish; she always does what she wants."

Lena nods but stays silent. She knows Sera can be a little bit selfish, putting her wants before others, but she's still one of her best friends. She'd rather blame Paul for ruining her good time, but how can she do that? He's a guy, and Sera likes him, so obviously he's hoping to hook up with her. Lena isn't stupid, and she knows Paul wouldn't turn down a chance to get in Sera's pants. Plus, it was _his _idea to buy tickets to Bumbershoot, and Lena can't blame him for wanting to bring along one of her friends who is actually into him.

Lena sighs. "I'm going to the bathroom. I'll be right back, okay?" She gets to her feet, looking down at Embry for a response. She can see him looking around for the bathroom's location and she smiles a little inside at his thoughtfulness. "It's right there," She points to her destination, which is straight across the field, still in eyesight.

"Okay," Embry says, "I'll be right here."

Lena heads for the bathroom, fully intending on doing her business and returning to Em, but on the way back to their spot on the grass she sees a head in the crowd that is very familiar and redirects her feet. She's not even sure it's actually him, but it certainly looks like Paul from the back; black hair, white t-shirt, just a few inches taller than almost everyone standing within a twenty foot radius of him. He turns just slightly and Lena confirms that it _is _her jerk neighbor who's been avoiding her all day. He sees her approach and waves, looking happy to see her.

"Hey," Paul greets as Lena joins him while he waits in line for another beer, which apparently they're not carding people for at this event since it's his third one, "There you are."

"Uh..." Lena frowns, "What is that supposed to mean? I've been calling and texting Sera for hours. Where have you guys been?" She turns her head left to right and adds, "Where is Sera?"

Paul is confused as well. Sera didn't tell him Lena's been calling. In fact, she told him that Lena and Embry preferred to hang out alone for a while. He points vaguely over his shoulder, "She's over there, looking at necklaces. She can't make up her mind about which one she wants. Maybe you should go help her?"

Lena crosses her arms in front of her chest, assuming an aggravated stance. Why would she want to go help Sera pick out a necklace when she's been purposefully ignoring her all afternoon? "If she wanted my help, Paul, she probably would have returned my text messages. I think she's made it pretty clear that she doesn't want to hang out with me. That's fine. You two have fun."

"Hang on a second," Paul says, noting that Lena is a little pissed at the moment, "I didn't even know you were trying to find us. You didn't call my phone."

He's right. Lena hadn't even thought to try Paul's phone, even though she does have his number. She just assumed if Sera was ignoring her that Paul would be too. "Phones work both ways," Lena points out stubbornly, "You could have called me too." She backs away from him a few feet, feeling like this could turn into an actual argument, which is not something she wants to do in a crowded place. "I'm going back to find Embry before he gets worried about me. You know, since that's what people do when their friends disappear at a festival."

"Lena," Paul calls after her as she starts to walk away, not sure if he should step out of line or not since he's been waiting already for about ten minutes, "What do you want me to -" He sighs in frustration when she doesn't stop to listen. "Whatever," He mumbles under his breath. He's not going to chase her down when she's ticked off. He'll let her boyfriend deal with that.

About a minute later, when Paul is finally at the head of the line and waiting on his beer, Sera pops up at his side, a huge smile on her face. "Hey! I found you," She giggles, "You're actually pretty easy to spot, Mr. Tall Guy." Paul just smiles while Sera continues, "I finally made up my mind." She holds up her left arm to show off the brightly colored bracelet weaved of string, which wasn't there before. "I got a bracelet instead. You like it?"

_See, _Paul thinks to himself, _This is why I asked Lena to go help her, so I wouldn't have to answer stupid questions like this. _Paul nods, having enough experience with girls to know how to appropriately respond, "Yeah, it's nice." He's glad to see the clear plastic cup of golden beer being passed his way, and he takes it with a grateful tip of his head. Then he and Sera step away from the booth and look across the field at the stage where some band Paul's never heard of is playing.

"Thanks," Sera smiles at the compliment, feeling like her day with Paul is going great so far. She only wishes Lena would stop blowing up her phone; Lena knows how much she's into Paul so why can't she stop bugging them? Why would she want to hang out with Lena and Embry, the lovebirds, when she's got Paul, the hottie, Lahote with her? Isn't the answer obvious?! "What do you want to do now?"

Paul glances at his phone and it honestly surprises him to see it's almost 6pm. They arrived at about 1:30, so he can see why Lena was starting to worry about them. "Maybe we should meet up with Lena and Embry and get something to eat?"

Sera laughs and suggests, "Well, if you want to meet up with them, you better chug that beer and get rid of the evidence. Embry and Lena are like the party police; no underage drinking, no experimental drug use, no crazy behavior around them because they're _good kids_." She rolls her hazel eyes in disgust.

Paul isn't sure what to say to that, because he thought Lena and Sera were best friends but Sera is acting like they're not. Besides, he's known Lena almost as long as Sera has, he moved into the house next door to hers when he was eight, and he's never thought of her as a stuck-up good girl. She's smart, sure, and she does well in school, but she works hard for that. Lena knows how to have fun...doesn't she? He shrugs his broad shoulders and tips his head back to chug the rest of the beer, as Sera suggested. He swallows, lets out a rather loud belch, and chucks the plastic cup in the nearest garbage. "Let's go. Why don't you call Lena and ask her where they are?"

Sera is taken-aback, but she follows Paul, pulling her phone from the pocket of her romper and begrudgingly dialing Lena's number. She puts the phone to her ear and waits as it rings. On the fourth ring, Lena finally picks up, and she replies, "Hey, Lena. Paul and I are looking for you."

"Really?" Lena is surprised; did Paul convince her to call? "Well, we were thinking of getting something for dinner..."

"Us too," Sera replies. "Want to meet by the big blue tent? It's the one we split up at earlier."

"Sure," Lena agrees, "See you there."

When Sera hangs up with Lena though, she sees the guy with the green mohawk and purple backpack that she and Paul ran into earlier, who told her to find him when she's ready to have a really good time. She asked Paul what he meant, but Paul just said he'd tell her later, or that if they saw him again she could ask him herself. "Wait," Sera demands, catching Paul's elbow and halting his footsteps, "There's that guy from before. You said we could go talk to him, remember?"

"Who?" Paul asks in confusion.

"The one with the purple backpack," Sera subtly points him out, "Come on, let's go before he's gone again."

"Sera," Paul warns as she tries to pull him in the direction of the loser with the spiky green mohawk, "That guy is a stoner. He probably wants to sell you some weed. I was only joking before when I said you could ask him later."

"It didn't sound like you were joking," Sera insists, "I just want to talk to him. It's not a big deal."

Paul allows her to drag him along, but he reminds her, "You just told Lena we'd meet her in front of the blue food stand."

"So?" Sera says flippantly, "We'll still meet up with them. After..." She turns and sends him a mischievous smirk over her shoulder.

**.**

"What the Hell?!" Lena bursts, her anger finally reaching a boiling point after waiting over thirty minutes in front of the designated tent for Sera and Paul to show, like they said they would. "They ditched us again! It doesn't take thirty-five freaking minutes to walk from one end of this festival to the other, so clearly saying they were going to meet us here was a big, fat lie!"

Embry places his hands on Lena's shoulders and says soothingly, "Lena, calm down. I'm sure there's a reason they're not here. Maybe Sera meant a different tent?"

"This is the only big freaking blue tent here, Embry!" Lena gestures as wildly as she can with Embry holding her shoulders still. She realizes she just sounded like a crazy person, so she sighs, "I'm sorry, it's not your fault and here I am yelling at you."

"It's okay," Embry says, "You're allowed to be mad."

"I don't want to be mad though. You know what?" Lena decides, "Let's just forget about them. I'm hungry. Let's just get some food and go sit down and eat. We'll set up the blanket by the other stage now because Red Hot Chili Peppers are on at seven."

"Yeah, whatever you want to do. Can we go to that burger stand though, with the cheese fries?"

Lena can't help but laugh as she admits, "That's what I was going to suggest. Those cheese fries smelled so good when we walked by earlier."

They walk side-by-side to the burger stand a few rows of booths away, Lena still keeping an eye out for Sera or Paul, and get in the rather large line to place their orders. Lena asks for two frozen lemonades, a bacon cheeseburger with ketchup and mustard, and a small order of cheese fries on the side. Embry asks for a foot long hot dog with all the fixin's, and a large order of cheese fries. When they see the amount of fries and melted cheese that comes with the large, Lena laughs and bets Embry ten bucks he won't be able to finish his hot dog and all the fries. Embry, as usual, takes on her bet. They carry the food across the field to the stage on the opposite side from where they were seated before, spreading out Lena's blanket once more in a spot great for viewing the Red Hot Chili Peppers' performance, which is about to start in twenty minutes.

"Mmm," Lena murmurs after taking a bite of her perfectly grilled bacon cheeseburger, "This might be the best burger I've ever had." She pulls an ooey, gooey cheese fry from the cardboard container and takes a bite of that as well. After swallowing, she comments, "These are good too. Really good."

Embry doesn't speak until he finishes everything in his cardboard take-out food box. He wipes his mouth with a napkin before announcing, "That was pretty damn good. And I told you I'd eat it all."

Lena mock scowls, "How can you eat so much? Where does it all go?" She's only teasing, but she's always surprised how much Embry can eat and still remain as lean as he is. He has grown at least four inches in the past six months though, so that could be a factor in his increased appetite. Still, he won the bet fair and square, so Lena fishes a ten dollar bill out of the small pocket in her backpack and hands it over.

Embry smiles smugly and states, "I'm going to go get us ice cream."

"You still have room for more food?" Lena's dark brown eyes widen in surprise.

"If you don't want one..." Embry says teasingly, "Then you don't have to have one."

Lena tries to keep a straight face, but she ends up smiling. "I guess I could eat a small cone."

"Chocolate or vanilla?" Embry asks as he stands up.

"Swirl," Lena decides with another smile. "Do you want me to come with you?"

"No, stay here. I'll be right back." Embry gathers up his garbage to toss out on his way, and leaves Lena to finish her burger and fries.

Lena takes a few more bites of her burger, wipers her mouth with a napkin, and decides that she's done. If she finishes everything on her plate, like Embry did, she'll feel sick and definitely won't be able to eat the ice cream cone she requested. She pulls out her phone once more to check on the time. Five more minutes until Red Hot Chili Peppers. She hopes Embry will make it back in time. She still can't believe it's been over an hour since Sera called her, never showed up at their meeting spot, and hasn't bothered to call her since. Lena debates calling her friend to see what happened, but she doesn't believe Sera will answer. She recalls what Paul said earlier about her never trying his phone, so she scrolls through her contacts for his number and hesitates only a second before selecting it. She waits as it rings, and rings, and rings...and he never picks up.

"Pfft," Lena ends the call, shaking her head in annoyance, "Figures." She drops her phone to the blanket next to her crossed legs and returns her eyes to the stage, where a few men wearing all black are testing the microphones for the upcoming performance.

Embry returns soon after Lena's failed attempt at contacting Paul and Sera, and hands her the small cone of chocolate and vanilla swirled soft-serve ice cream. She thanks him with a kiss on the cheek. She almost tells him about Paul ignoring her call, but she decides it's not worth it. She doesn't want to get all worked up again over her so-called best friend and stupid neighbor choosing to ditch her and Embry rather than spend the day together. The Red Hot Chili Peppers take the stage in a moment, and Lena settles in Embry's arm to enjoy the performance, her mind finally distracted.

Of course, not even twenty minutes into the show, Lena's phone starts buzzing at her side. She reaches for it, surprised to see Paul's name flashing across the screen. She shows Embry her phone and he motions for her to answer it. She thinks it'd be fair to make Paul and Sera sweat it out a little, wonder what she and Embry are doing for a change, but she doesn't do that. She lets it ring one more time before pressing the green accept button and putting the phone to her ear.

"Hello?"

"Lena," Paul greets loudly, "Don't hang up, and don't be mad!"

Lena frowns, stating, "I wouldn't have answered at all if I was going to hang up on you. What do you want?" She said she wouldn't hang up, not that she'd be nice. He can't tell her not to be mad when he ignored her phone call and never showed up for dinner.

"We need to go," Paul says, getting right to the point, "Sera's not feeling good. She took something from this guy, and she was really happy for a little while, but now she says she feels sick."

"What do you mean she took something?" Lena asks, all angry thoughts forgotten as they are immediately replaced with worry for her friend, "Like drugs? What did she take? Where are you guys?"

She can feel Embry's eyes on her as she listens intently to Paul's voice in her ear, "I don't know what it was. I told her not to take anything from that sketchy mohawk guy, but she didn't want to listen to me. It was probably ecstasy or something, some kind of pill."

There are so many things Lena could say right now; is he stupid or something? Is this really happening right now? She knew nothing good would come of Paul and Sera spending the entire day at a festival together, and she was completely right to worry! Not that she anticipated something like this happening, but what was Sera thinking? What was Paul thinking, letting her take some foreign pill? What if Sera overdosed and she's going to die? Do they have to take her to the hospital? Where is the nearest hospital? Her parents are going to ground her for the rest of her life.

"Where. Are. You?" Lena repeats, loud and clear this time as she and Embry gather up their things to leave. She is so grateful for Embry in this moment, following her lead without asking any questions at all. He is the exact kind of person you want around in a time of crisis because he stays calm and collected.

"By the front gate," Paul replies, "She doesn't want to leave."

Lena slings her backpack over her shoulder and starts leading the way towards the gate, away from the stage, telling Paul, "We're on our way." She jams her thumb over the end call button and shoves her phone in the back pocket of her jean shorts. "I can't believe this," She fumes, "They are the two stupidest people I've ever met in my life. Sera took some kind of drug from a stranger, and Paul didn't even stop her. I knew we couldn't trust them to be alone."

"We should buy a few water bottles before we go," Embry suggests, pointing towards a refreshment stand that doesn't have a line at the moment, "Sera might need some." Lena nods, trusting his judgement, and they stop to purchase three cold water bottles.

When they get to the gate where they entered this afternoon, there are only a few people lingering around so it is easy to find Paul and Sera. The chestnut-haired brunette is leaning heavily on her male companion, smiling crookedly at him as she traces her hand up and down his chest, liking the way it feels against her skin. Her vision is blurred, so she can't see him clearly, but she knows it's Paul by the way he smells, clean and masculine and sexy. Her head is pounding and she's got the chills, but it feels good being this close to Paul. "Let's go to your truck," Sera says suggestively, trying to appear seductive, which isn't really working since she can barely keep her eyes open and looks like she might pass out.

"We will," Paul assures her, "When Lena and Embry get here." He's trying not to be annoyed with her, but this chick is really getting on his nerves. He told her not to listen to that guy with his mystery goodies in his purple backpack, but Sera was like a kid in a candy store. She wanted to try everything! He might have had four or five beers total today, but he wasn't about to experiment with drugs from a total stranger. He doesn't need that shit, and Sera shouldn't have needed it either. Now she's all messed up and he doesn't know what to do. At least she's not having a seizure or foaming at the mouth, but she's acting weird...

"We're here," Lena announces her and Embry's presence. She places a water bottle in Sera's hand, having already removed the cap, and says gently, "Drink some water, Ser." She can't help but glare in Paul's direction; she can't be mad at Sera when she's in this condition, but she can be mad at Paul. "How exactly did this happen?"

"I don't even know," Paul shrugs, unsure, "We were coming to meet you guys, and she saw this dude with a damn backpack that told her he could give her something to make sure she has a really good time."

"And you let her take it?" Lena asks incredulously. "What is wrong with you?"

"She wouldn't listen to me, Lena," Paul says defensively, "What was I supposed to do? Drag her away from him? I'm not her damn babysitter."

"Hey," Sera cuts in after gulping down half the water bottle Lena handed her, "Don't get mad at Paul. He wasn't even there when I took it. He was getting another beer."

"Oh, a beer?" Lena shoots Paul an even nastier glare, "So you've been drinking? You're an idiot. Hand over your keys."

"What?" Paul objects, "No way."

"I don't want to leave," Sera protests, "I just need to lay down for a minute. I'll be okay."

"You're not going to drive us home when you've been drinking!" Lena yells, holding out her hand for his keys, which Paul is holding tightly in his fist. She ignores Sera, since it doesn't matter what the girl says, they're going home right now. The night is already ruined.

"I'm fine," Paul insists, "You can't drive anyways, you don't even have your license."

"No, but Embry does," Lena corrects, "So hand over the keys." Paul reluctantly drops his keys in her outstretched palm. He doesn't want to let the boyfriend drive his truck, but Lena isn't giving him much of a choice. Besides, as much as he refuses to admit it, he probably shouldn't drive right now. He wasn't expecting to be getting behind the wheel for at least another two or three hours. Lena passes the keys to Embry and announces, "Let's go."

Ten minutes later, they've located Paul's truck and argued about the seating arrangements. Obviously, Embry wanted Lena up front with him, to help navigate them home. Sera wanted the back seat with Paul, so they could at least make out on the drive all the way home to La Push. But then Sera barfed all over the parking lot, and Lena offered up her spot in the front seat _again_, since it's the obvious choice for someone who might need to exit the vehicle frequently to vomit. As Lena climbed into the back, behind Sera's seat and across from Paul, she sighed and leaned her head back against the window. _It's going to be a long ride home, _She decided as Embry started up the engine, and she was right.

* * *

Author's Note: Wow, this chapter turned out much longer than I thought it'd be. And they're still not home from the festival! Not a lot of Paul/Lena moments this chapter, but I promise more next chapter, which I hope to post by tomorrow. It will start with the ride home from Bumbershoot and go on from there. Not much longer now until Paul changes for the first time :)

Please Review! Your comments are always appreciated :)


	7. Chapter 7

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 7! Welcome new followers &amp; favoriters; thanks for adding my story to your alerts! :) I hope everyone had a Happy Easter this past weekend. I wanted to give you guys an Easter update, but I ended up being out all day with my family and I was too exhausted.

Thanks to **twilight85fan **for reviewing last chapter! :) You were my ONLY reviewer, which makes me wonder if everyone else hated last chapter or what? ;) Please drop me a line or two at the end of the chapter, let me know what you guys are thinking; I always take your suggestions and ideas into consideration, and I truly appreciate you taking the time to give me some feedback. Hopefully this chapter will bring a few more reviewers :)

WARNING: There are a few swears this chapter, nothing I'd consider M-worthy, but just thought I'd throw it out there. I will change the rating to M if things start to get more mature, but for now it will stay T.

* * *

**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**7\. You're Gonna Miss Me**

Ten minutes into the ride home from Seattle to La Push, Sera is deeply asleep in the front seat beside Embry, mouth hanging open and everything. Lena, feeling motherly, removes her bomber jacket and folds it up into a makeshift pillow, sliding it between Sera's head and the window of the truck so she's more comfortable. She hopes sleeping off whatever pill Sera took will help her to feel better once she wakes up. Sera's sleeping over her house again tonight, and she doesn't need her parents asking questions and assuming Lena took something along with Sera.

"Think she'll wake up if I turn on the radio?" Embry wonders aloud, in a quiet tone.

"Nah," Paul puts his two-cents in, "I doubt it."

Embry switches on the radio, not too loud, and browses through the stations for one that works in the area. "So, Paul," Embry asks as he passes another street sign, "I get on the highway up here, and that takes me all the way to Port Angeles?"

Paul leans up to look at the sign, just to be sure, before telling the other male, "Yep. You'll see the signs for Port Angeles."

"Okay," Embry nods, settling into the seat for the three and a half hour drive ahead of him, "I know where to go from there."

Lena folds her arms in front of her chest and pulls her legs in closer to her body, putting them further from Paul's long legs, which are crowding her foot space. She doesn't remember Embry taking up this much room when he was sat there, or being so uncomfortable by it. Unfortunately, the position isn't comfortable in the slightest, so she doesn't hold it long. She shifts her body in the bucket seat, angling her legs in a different direction, but finding Paul's _other _leg now in the way.

"Seriously?" Lena mumbles, "Could you be any more in the way?"

Paul smirks, finding it a little funny that Lena is trying so hard to be mad at him when he doesn't really think he did anything to warrant this much anger. He moves one of his legs so she can position her legs better, and then he returns his leg to its previous spot, trapping hers in between his. She flicks her eyes up to his in annoyance. "What's the matter?" He asks innocently.

"You," Lena returns, "You're bothering me."

"Why?" Paul asks, trying not to laugh at her, "Because my leg is touching yours?" He lets a chuckle out.

"It's not funny," Lena says with a pout, "I'm really mad at you."

Paul rolls his eyes, knowing all along this was coming, "Really? I hadn't noticed. Why are you mad, Lena?" He pauses, waiting for her to answer, but she only makes a face at him, so he fills in, "Because I let Sera take some pill? Because I drank a few beers? Because I couldn't pick up the phone when you called since Sera was trying to remove my pants in front of a crowd of people?" He sees Lena purse her lips together in an attempt to hide her smile. He mimics what she said before, "It's not funny, Lena."

Lena stubbornly keeps a straight face, despite finding it funny that Sera would try and take Paul's pants off at the festival. "I didn't say it was," She says once she's able to, "And yeah, all those reasons, and the fact that you guys said you were coming to meet us and then didn't show up, _again. _And because we had to leave when all the best bands were about to play."

"And how is all of that my fault?" Paul asks, failing to see how Sera's choices have made him the bad guy. "I couldn't stop Sera, okay? I told her we should meet up with you guys again, but she wanted to do her own thing. I called you back once I noticed you called." He gestures to Sera's passed out form in the front seat of his truck and suggests, "Why don't you be mad at her instead? She ditched you today, not me."

Lena frowns as she realizes he's right. She shouldn't be placing all the blame on Paul when it was Sera's decisions that resulted in them leaving the festival early. Paul drank a few beers, yes, but he isn't shit-faced or anything. He could have taken the same thing Sera did, and then she and Embry would be babysitting two drugged up teenagers rather than one. He did call her when Sera started acting strange. He did make the right call in saying they should head home early. She supposes she's finding it easy to be mad at Paul right now because she can't very well yell at Sera when she's sleeping. She'll have quite a few things to say to her in the morning though, when she's feeling better. She admits quietly, "I am mad at her."

Now that all her anger isn't aimed at him, Paul jokes, "Got anything to eat? I'm starving."

Lena opens her mouth to say no, but then she remembers, "Actually...I do." She reaches into the front seat, between Embry and Sera, for her backpack and removes her leftovers from the festival. She offers it to Paul, "Half a bacon cheeseburger, and a few cheese fries, which might be gross now that they're cold."

Paul grabs the take-out box and smiles appreciatively, "Thanks."

Lena shrugs, "Sure." She zips her backpack and positions it behind her as a cushion since the back of the seat is starting to get uncomfortable.

Paul clears the plate in about a minute, enjoying every bite despite its cool temperature. All food is good food when he's hungry. He shoves the empty container under his seat, for now, and tries to get comfortable. He glances at Sera in the front seat, sleeping like a baby, and is somewhat jealous of her at the moment. He'd fall asleep if he could, but there's no way he'd be able to without spreading out his legs, and Lena is not going to let that happen. He catches Lena yawning though, and thinks that maybe if he's smooth enough, he might be able to...

When Lena feels Paul's hand on her ankle, she jerks upright in surprise and asks him, "What are you doing?"

"Relax," Paul says calmly, taking her other ankle in his opposite hand and pulling her legs up to rest on his lap, "See? That's all I wanted to do. Now I can do this," He stretches his legs out in front of her seat, where her feet were previously. "That's better," He comments, leaning his head back against the cool glass window. He closes his eyes.

Lena stares at the boy opposite from her in surprise and wonders if he's seriously going to sleep right now. She waits almost a full minute, watching him, until she decides he is. She resigns herself to the position she's in, fidgeting a little until she finds herself comfy enough to fall asleep. She'd probably be more comfortable if she took her shoes off, but there's no way she'd do that with her feet in Paul's lap; she's barely okay with that as it is, since it feels weird to touch any guy that isn't _her_ guy. But they are in a cramped back seat, with very little options, and it's almost 9PM and they still have at least two and half more hours on the road until they get home, so Lena doesn't think she should be stressing it so much. If she closes her eyes for a little while, they'll be closer to home when she opens them again.

Turns out, Lena's theory was correct, but the way in which she opened her eyes and awoke was when another person's body landed in her lap; Sera had awoken, forty-five minutes away from home, and decided she felt better now and wanted to be with Paul in the backseat. She didn't, of course, want to wait for Embry to pull over to the side of the road for them to wake up Lena and Paul and switch seats the correct and legal way, so she just climbed over the seat and plopped herself on top of Lena. In the process, one of Lena's feet was knocked straight into Paul's groin, which woke him up in a not-so pleasant way.

"Oh my God," Lena says when she realizes where her foot just landed, "I'm so sorry. Sera, what the heck are you doing? Get off me." She attempts to shove the other girl off her lap, but there's nowhere for her to go except to fall into Paul.

"I'm pulling over," Embry calls to the back, signaling the truck into the break-down lane and coming to a full stop. He reaches across the seat to the passenger side and pulls the seat forward so Lena has room to climb up.

"You can sit up there now," Sera announces happily to Lena.

Lena grumbles, annoyed at being woken up in such an abrupt way, but she does climb sloppily into the front seat and pull on the seat belt. She sighs and looks over at Embry, who sends her a weary smile. She manages to send him one back, since she feels bad he's been awake all this time by himself, driving them home. She looks to the clock on the dashboard and asks, "Are we almost home?"

"Yeah," Embry replies as he merges back onto the highway, "Less than forty-five minutes now."

"Sorry I fell asleep," She says.

"Don't be," Embry tells her, "It's been a long day. I can't wait to go to bed." He laughs and Lena joins him. When they stop, they can hear the sounds of heavy breathing and lips smacking together from the backseat. Lena's eyes widen and she tries not to laugh as she turns the radio up so she and Embry don't have to listen to Paul and Sera make out the rest of the ride home.

"I still had fun today," Lena says a few minutes later, "With you. It was a great birthday present."

"I'm really glad."

**.**

Lena doesn't see Paul again, aside from casual sightings in passing when she sees him leaving the house next door or vice versa, until their Saturday shift together at Fawling Market. She hasn't seen Sera either, and after the argument they got into Monday morning, she's not sure Sera wants to talk to her presently. Lena understands that Sera already has strict parents and doesn't want to feel like one of her best friends is trying to parent her as well, but Lena doesn't think worrying about Sera for taking drugs is the same thing as being an over-bearing friend. Sera is lucky she didn't suffer any serious consequences due to her poor lack of judgment, at least that's what Lena thinks. Sera thinks since everything turned out fine, Lena is overreacting. She and Lena agreed to disagree that morning, and they haven't talked since. Paul and Lena ended on better terms than that, simply saying goodnight and see ya later on Sunday night, and Lena has since decided she's not mad at Paul anymore. She was simply misplacing her anger on him when it should have been directed at Sera.

"How was your birthday, Miss Sweet Sixteen?" Aunt Shayna asks when she enters the Market to start her shift and sees her niece. "Sorry I couldn't make it over for cake. I'm a slave to this place, you know."

"It's okay, Shayna," Lena replies, "We should have saved you a piece, but it was gone by the next morning. I live in a house full of greedy cake-eating monsters. I only got to eat one piece of my own birthday cake."

"Oh, you poor baby," Shayna teases and Lena sticks out her tongue. Abruptly changing the subject, Shayna questions, "Is Little Riv here yet?"

"River?" Lena repeats, confused as to why her aunt would be expecting her cousin at the Market. "No, why?"

"She's going to be working here for the next few weeks," Shayna reminds, "While Paul is away, remember?"

"Oh, right," Lena realizes, "He's going to see his mom. I forgot about that."

"Your mind is already growing weaker in your old age," Shayna, who is only twenty-eight, mocks her niece again, "This is how it starts, Lena. First, you forget the simple things and the next thing you know you can't even remember your own name."

Lena smirks, pointing out, "You first, Auntie."

Shayna is her father's youngest sister, being twelve years younger than Simon and twelve years older than Lena, so the two females have a special relationship. Simon and Shayna have another sister, between them, named Tanaya. She is the mother of River, Raven, and Noah, who are Lena and her siblings only cousins. Winona is an only child, and Shayna doesn't have any children yet, nor does she plan to any time soon.

"Ha. Ha." Shayna laughs dryly, "Aren't you cute?" She sends the younger girl a mock stern glare and orders, "Get back to work."

Lena smiles wryly as she resumes re-stocking the shelf of canned vegetables, which is what she was doing before her aunt interrupted her. She supposes she'll have to get back on her register soon, especially if River is coming in for a training session. It's usually Lena or her father who train new employees on the cash register, and since Simon's Saturday shift has already ended, Lena assumes it will be she teaching her cousin. She doesn't mind; it's actually fun for her to show someone else the ropes. Plus, it will be enjoyable having River around for the next month while Paul is away in Tacoma. Lena finishes up the remainder of the canned goods in her borrowed cart, returns the cart to the front of the store, and steps behind register number 2, since Leah is currently using number 1.

"It's really slow today," Lena comments absentmindedly.

"Don't say that," Leah groans, "You just jinxed us. Now we're going to be busy for hours!"

Lena laughs at Leah's theory, wondering if the older girl will be right. She doesn't have long to think on it though, since River walks in the door a few minutes later and waves hello. Lena sends her to the back to talk to their aunt first, to let her know she's here and see what Shayna would like her to do to start, and about ten minutes after that River returns to register 2.

"Hey," River smiles at her cousin, who is three months younger, "Aunt Shayna said to watch you on the register for a little while, and then maybe you can show me how to ring out a customer?"

Lena nods, "Yeah, of course. It's really easy. You can watch me once, and then I'll walk you through it because you'll catch on faster if you actually do it."

"Sounds good," River comments. Since there are currently no customers waiting to check-out, River decides to ask, "Are you still not talking to Sera?"

"Uh..." Lena looks around to ensure they aren't going to be overheard by anyone, aside from Leah since she already heard about last weekend's highlights, "No. I sent her a text last night, but she didn't answer. I'm just going to let her come to me when she's ready. I mean, if she wanted to talk she would have replied, so I don't really know what else to do. I'm not going to apologize for being concerned about her."

"Honestly," River confides to her raven-haired kin, "I think she's more upset that you didn't let her spend the night at Paul's than anything else."

"Seriously?!" Lena rolls her eyes, scoffing, "Well, gee, I hope she can forgive me for being such a twat-block. It's not like my parents were sitting awake, waiting for us to arrive home safely. Oh. Wait. Yes, they were, and they would have been a little bit suspicious if Sera never came home with me."

Leah snorts, repeating Lena's previous words, "Twat-block. Ba-ha-ha! That's a good one, Lena. I might have to steal that from you."

River smiles humorously before commenting, "I'm sure Sera will come around...eventually."

At what couldn't have been a more perfect time, a customer comes strolling down Lena's aisle with a full grocery cart, and Lena returns to business. She does each step of the check-out process a tiny bit slower than usual, to give River time to watch what she's doing, and then she thanks the customer for her business. After the woman leaves, Lena asks River if she has any questions.

River hums, "Mm...I don't think so."

The bell above the double-doors chimes as someone enters the store, and Lena looks to the clock on her register when she sees it's Paul. She states smugly as he walks past her register, "You're late. Again." It's eight minutes after 2pm, so he's technically only eight minutes late, but Lena likes to point it out to him each time he doesn't arrive promptly at 2.

"Yeah, thanks for that," Paul says sarcastically. He turns to look at her, walking backwards through the aisle as he asks, "What are you going to do while I'm gone and you have no one to harass for being late to work?"

"I don't know," Lena calls back in a joking manner, "I think I'll live though."

"Aw, don't lie," Paul teases, "You're going to miss me." He turns and walks into the back before she can argue.

"Pfft," Leah murmurs under her breath, "Yeah, we'll miss him. About as much as you miss a dog turd you just scraped off the bottom of your shoe."

River covers her mouth with her hand to smother her laughter but Lena doesn't hide her chuckle. She admits, "Now _that _is what I'm going to miss," referring to Leah's jab at Paul. As often as the two of them drive her crazy, they also have her cracking up, and she knows Saturdays are not going to be the same with Paul gone. She adds another thing to the list, "That, and the fact that I'll have to actually learn how to start the lawnmower..." She makes a face to show how much she dislikes this idea. The Fawling lawnmower is about as old, if not older, than Lena, and when Forrest 'forgets' his Saturday chore of mowing the lawn, the only way Lena ever gets it done on Sunday is if she catches Paul early enough in the morning, before he heads to work, and asks him to start it for her.

"You can't start a lawnmower?" Leah raises an eyebrow at her, like she might be more of an idiot that Leah originally thought.

"It's really hard," Lena insists, "It's not like I haven't tried. The friggin' thing is ancient. It might be easier to just cut the lawn with a pair of scissors than attempt to start up that prehistoric piece of junk."

**.**

Ironically enough, when Paul is loading up his truck for the trip to Tacoma on Sunday afternoon, Lena is in the front yard struggling with the lawnmower. She bends down, inspecting the rusty old thing, trying to figure out why exactly it won't turn on when she yanks the chain, and then stands up with an aggravated sigh. Paul watches her with an amused smirk as he tosses his last bag into the back of the truck. Lena reaches for the chain, holding her breath in hopes that might help, and gives it a good, hard pull.

"Nothing," Lena mumbles at her failed attempt, "Why am I not surprised?"

She hadn't noticed Paul come outside, since her back was turned, so it startles her when he suddenly speaks. "Let me try." Without waiting for a response, he grabs the chain and pulls, smiling as the motor rumbles to life.

Lena looks up at Paul, her expression a mixture of relief and annoyance. "How did you do that? Why does it always work when you try?"

Paul shrugs, gloating, "I've got the magic touch." In reality, he knows it's because he's stronger than her, but Lena would probably smack him if he said that. She likes to think she's tougher than she is.

Lena shakes her head, not bothering to respond to his ridiculous claim. She says, "Thanks. I thought you already left."

"Nope," Paul replies, "I'm about to though." He's glad he can drive himself this year, since he has his truck and his license now. In previous years, his dad would drive him half-way to meet his mom, and then she'd drive the other half-way back to Tacoma. It was always awkward since his dad refuses to speak to his mom, or even look at her. Paul thinks it's because she got remarried a little over a year after they got divorced, and she had another baby the year after that. Paul doesn't mind his step-dad, Anthony, who is an Italian fireman, and he loves his five-year-old half-sister, Mia; or is she six now? He's glad his mom was able to move on and be happy. He only wishes his dad had been able to do the same.

"Well, be careful," Lena warns him, "You know, drive safe." If she remembers correctly, Tacoma is south of Seattle a ways, so the drive time is about the same: three and a half hours or so.

"I will," Paul says, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. It's kind of nice to hear someone say that, since it's not like his dad told him to be safe or anything. He barely said goodbye to his son at all; it's almost like he doesn't care Paul will be gone for four full weeks. Paul recalls a trick his dad taught him once, so he decides to pass it along to his neighbor. "Here, let me show you something," He says as he stoops down to adjust the height of the blades that cut the grass, "If you lower this closer to the ground, it will cut the grass shorter." Lena stares at him blankly, so he elaborates, "That way, you won't have to mow it again next week. It should give you an extra week, maybe two. But you'll still have to get someone to turn her on for you." He smirks.

"Really? Thanks," Lena smiles, wondering why he never showed her this trick before now. "Hopefully Forrest will just do it, like he's supposed to, and then I won't have to mess with this thing again."

Paul nods, sticking his hands in the pockets of his jeans, "Yep."

Lena realizes now she's probably holding him up from leaving, so she comments, "I hope you have a nice time visiting your mom."

"Thanks."

"See you in...four weeks, right?" Lena questions, even though she knows she was correct.

Paul nods, taking that as his cue to leave. "Four weeks," He repeats. "Try not to miss me too much."

Lena shakes her head, humoring him with her reply, "I'll try." She wonders if she should give him a hug or something, but that would be weird, right? She's never done that before, and he goes to visit with his mom every summer.

Paul smiles as he takes a few steps away from her, "See ya, Fish Sticks."

Lena smiles back, ignoring the nickname, "Bye." Then she turns to the lawnmower and starts tackling the chore of cutting the grass.

* * *

Author's Note: So, sorry **twilight85fan** because you didn't want Paul &amp; Sera to make out but they did :( Not to worry though, because Paul is visiting his mom for most of the month of July, and when he returns his change is right around the corner. Soon the only girl on his mind will be Lena ;)

I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! Please Review! Please let me know what you think, I always appreciate your comments and suggestions :)


	8. Chapter 8

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 8! Welcome new followers, I'm happy to have you :) I've been busy this week, binge-watching Game of Thrones with my husband, who finally decided to start watching with me. We were hoping to be all caught up before the season 5 premiere Sunday night, but we failed :( Anyways, I wanted to get this up sooner, but that happened haha. I should be able to post the next chapter much quicker.

I want to especially thank those of you who reviewed last chapter: Guest, jace4ever, hayhay196, WriteAndDream23 &amp; Guest! Your comments are super appreciated and made me smile :) I'm glad you guys like Lena!

* * *

**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**8\. Four, Five Seconds From Wildin'**

The month Paul was away in Tacoma passed quickly for Lena, days melting into weeks, each day seeming to mimic that which came before: wake-up, go running, do chores, go to work, hang out with Embry and/or Kim and River, repeat. Of course, that isn't all she did, but that's what it felt like. She also visited her paternal grandparents, who live on the rez, looked after her younger siblings when her parents weren't home, and even made a few trips to Port Angeles for shopping and movies. Working at the Market really sucked up a lot of her freedom, and she was a little jealous of Kim, who didn't have a job, and River, who was only obligated to work Saturday and Sunday until Paul returned. Even Embry didn't have a job, and spent most of his days with his two best friends, Jacob Black and Quil Ateara. Eventually, Sera called Lena and the two made up, but it was the longest time they'd been in an argument and Lena felt like it changed things between them. Lena had always been closer to Kim, while Sera was closer to River, but they all managed to stay good friends from the time they started preschool; it would be a shame if they started drifting apart with only two years left of high school.

"Can you believe school starts back up in exactly five weeks and two days?" Lena asks Kim with an elongated sigh as she leans back on her hands and stares up at the overcast sky.

"Stop moving," Kim scolds as she looks up from her sketchpad only to find Lena has changed position again, "I would have been done already if you'd just sit still." She flips her pencil around to erase the curve of her best friend's nose and then makes another attempt. When she deems the nose acceptable, she glances at Lena's face again and finally replies to her question, "I hadn't thought about it, but...five weeks is still a long time." She holds up her sketchpad so she can study it beside the real Lena before announcing, "There. I'm finished."

"Let me see it," Lena says with a smile, eagerly straightening up and brushing the dirt off her hands so that Kim will pass over the drawing.

At the start of their high school careers, Kim and Lena both chose art as their special elective class, Kim focusing mainly on drawing people and animals in black and white while Lena prefers to paint landscapes and objects in bright, vivid colors. Kim is amazingly realistic with her facial features, but she's also very hard on herself and tends to keep her work hidden until she's one hundred percent happy with the final product. She spends a lot of her time observing and drawing people in her sketchpad. Lena wishes she had as much time as Kim to spend on her art, but even with her free time this summer she's ashamed to admit, "I haven't even picked up a paintbrush since June."

Kim bites her bottom lip as she hesitantly turns the drawing in Lena's direction and allows the other girl to take her sketchpad for a better look. "You haven't? We're supposed to bring our best three pieces from this summer in to school on the first day," Kim reminds her friend, "Don't forget."

"Oh, I know," Lena assures her, "Trust me, I know." She's been thinking about it for the past month but nothing has inspired her enough to dedicate a whole afternoon putting her paintbrush to the canvas. Plus, she needs new paints and she hasn't gotten around to buying them just yet. She stares down at the paper in her lap, once again in awe of Kim's sheer artistic talent. It may be a pencil sketch, but Kim nailed Lena's looks exactly; it was like looking in a black-and-white mirror. "Kim, this is amazing. I don't even know what else to say. I can't believe you did _this _in only twenty minutes. It takes me hours, sometimes days to finish my paintings." She passes the sketchpad back to Kim, knowing how much it worries her to have it out of her hands for even a few minutes.

Kim smiles bashfully as she accepts the compliment, "Thanks. I think this is one of my better ones. You're easy to draw," Kim pauses, checking herself, "Minus the fact that you don't sit still, but I've sketched you a million times so I can get one of you done pretty quick." Lena is actually one of her favorite people to draw, because where most people would sit stiffly with a blank face or a huge smile, knowing they were having a portrait drawn, Lena almost forgets she's being watched and therefore looks much more natural. Kim closes her pad of precious drawings and places it on the grass beside her. She posed Lena at the base of the big Rocky Mountain Juniper tree in her backyard, since the trunk is so large and distinct that it makes for a good background, and it is too nice of a day to spend it inside. The sky is overcast and gray, but the air is warm, with a light summer breeze. Lena had slept over last night, along with her brother Cody, who is friends with Kim's younger brother Zachary, but the Fawling siblings would have to leave soon so that Lena could bring Cody home in time to go to work.

"Well I'm happy to model for you," Lena says, striking an over-dramatic pose and squishing her mouth together to give herself 'duck lips', "Any time."

Kim giggles, "That's a great look, Lena. Now just, hold that face for the next thirty minutes, and I'll get started..." She pretends to open her sketchpad to a blank page, but Lena bursts into laughter, reaching out to stop Kim from picking up her drawing pencil.

"No way," Lena protests, "I think _one _picture is enough for today. Besides, I can't even stay for another half hour. I have to get Cody home and change for work." She pouts, showing Kim how disappointed she is that she can't stay and hang out for longer.

"I know," Kim states. She has Lena's work schedule memorized, since it rarely changes. During the school year, Lena works Monday through Thursday afternoons from 4pm until 8pm, but during the summer her hours are stretched from 2pm to 8pm. Then, of course, there's her Saturday shift, which stays the same throughout the year, from 11am to 7pm. "Did you still want to plan a trip up to Port Angeles on Friday?"

Lena recalls they'd been discussing that last night before they fell asleep, and she nods, "Yeah. That sounds fun."

"Okay," Kim agrees, "And we'll invite River and Sera too, right?"

Lena nods her head again in confirmation, "Of course. Maybe Embry will want to come too, with Quil and Jacob; we can all go see that new Pirate's of the Caribbean movie. Oh, and remind me to buy some more paints. I have to get started on those three art projects."

Kim says she'll do her best to remind her, and that she'll call River and Sera today while Lena is working to let them know their plan for Friday. Both girls determine it's about time to check on their nine-year-old brothers and see what mischief they've been up to all morning. They find the boys in Zach's room, along with the biggest fort they've ever seen. Kim sighs loudly, since apparently Zach does this often, and the two teens help the boys to disassemble the sheets and blankets they've draped about the room until it's relatively clean. After they've finished, Lena checks the time and realizes she and Cody have to go or she won't have time to eat lunch before her shift at the Market begins.

"Come on, Code," Lena says from the front doorway of the Conweller's home, "I have to get you home now."

"Fine," Cody says with a pout. "Bye Zach, see you at soccer practice!" Since baseball ended in June and basketball doesn't start until mid-September, Cody opted to play soccer for the summer to stay active. He's a little jock-in-training, as Lena likes to say. He's a very athletic kid.

"Bye CJ!" Zach yells down the stairs to his friend and teammate. 'CJ' is the nickname Cody earned during his first year playing little league, which is when he turned six. His full name is Cody Jace Fawling, so the boys quickly began to call him CJ. Cody likes the nickname, but he refuses to allow anyone aside from his teammates to call him that.

Kim rolls her eyes at her brother's obnoxious yelling, wishing for it to be four o'clock already so she'd be free of babysitting duties. To Lena, she says, "Have fun at work. I'll text you later."

"Oh yeah," Lena replies sarcastically, "It's going to be boatloads of fun." She smiles and waves before turning to walk down the path which leads to the road, where Cody is not-so patiently waiting for her to join him. Their dad dropped them off at the Conweller's house last night, but it's only a fifteen minute walk home, so that's how they'll be getting back. They've done it many times before, and at least today it's not raining.

A few minutes into the walk, Cody questions, "Do you think I'll ever have my own room?" His mind is on Zach's room, which he has all to himself since he and Kim are the only two children of Mr. and Mrs. Conweller.

"Someday," Lena tells him, "After I go away to college and Forrest gets my room, then you'll have your own room." Unless she never goes _away _to college, and unless Forrest decides to keep the bigger room for himself, or their parents give it to Camille...but she doesn't tell Cody that.

Cody groans, "I'll be, like, _thirteen_ by then."

Lena can't help but laugh, since he makes it sound like the end of the world. She points out, "How do you think Forrest feels? He's been sharing a room with you since he was six." Cody doesn't say anything else after that. She knows how he feels, though. Having four other siblings has it's positives but it definitely has it's negatives too, and sharing everything is one of those things that comes with the territory. On the upside, there's always someone to talk to and play with, so it's basically impossible to get lonely or bored.

A couple streets away from home, a gray truck rumbles past the two as they're walking, causing Cody to point, "Hey, isn't that Paul's truck?"

"I think it is," Lena comments after watching it take a left down the road onto their home street. She hadn't thought Paul was coming home until this weekend, but she's almost positive that was him. Although, now that she thinks about it, he never told her when exactly he was coming home from his Mom's.

"Mom says he's a trouble-maker," Cody shares with his sister, "She says he has a bad attitude and an even worse temper. I don't think she likes him very much."

_Mom doesn't know what she's talking about, _Lena feels like saying, _She has no reason to dislike Paul, except for the fact that he has a drunk for a father. And she's probably heard the rumors that he's somewhat of a man whore, and he's gotten into quite a few fights at school..._"Paul's not a bad guy," Lena decides to tell Cody as she ruffles his shaggy black hair, "He just has a bad reputation."

"What does that mean?" Cody wonders, a frown on his cute face.

"It means..." Lena tries her best to explain it in a way her little brother will understand, "Well, people say things about a person, things that they believe are true, but it's only their opinion, and most of the time it isn't the truth. Or, at least, it's not the whole truth. Like when people say that Paul is _always _getting in fights at school; he doesn't _always_ get in fights, but he's been in enough for people to call him a trouble-maker. Maybe it wasn't him who started the fight, but because he has the reputation for it, people will always assume he's at fault. Does that make sense?"

"I guess so," Cody says with a shrug, "I think Paul's cool."

Of course he does. And, of course, the one time Lena sticks up for Paul, he has to go and prove her mother right by being a total jackass. As they pass by his house on the way to their own, Lena and Cody observe Paul angrily throwing his bags from his truck to the ground in front of his porch. He doesn't even look up as they walk by, even though he must have heard them. Lena wasn't going to say anything to him, since she can see how tense and angry he is from a distance away, but then she realizes how much he's changed in just four weeks. He must have grown another three or four inches while away, making him around six foot two or so, and while his body had been athletically toned for years now, his muscles look like they've nearly _doubled _in size. Lena can't stop staring, not because she's suddenly attracted to him or anything, but because it doesn't seem possible for a person to transform themselves so completely in such a short amount of time.

"Jeez, Paul," Lena eventually locates her tongue, "Did you spend your entire visit working out?!"

Paul clenches his jaw, grabbing the last of his bags and practically hurling it across the lawn at his front door, causing it to bang loudly as it collides against the door frame. He turns his head slightly to glare in Lena's direction, not in the mood to talk right now. He can't explain why her words make him so mad, because normally he'd take it as a compliment and ask her if she likes what she sees, but right now he feels like punching a hole through the side of his house. He wants to punch something so bad he feels like his body is trembling in anticipation. He knows it's probably because he's still angry about being asked to leave his mom's house early by his step-father, who said he'd been in a foul mood the past couple of weeks and they couldn't take his attitude any longer. He packed up his bags and left this morning, like they requested, but he's been in a bitch of a mood ever since. He breathes deeply through his nose, still staring at Lena darkly.

"O-kay then," Lena says, eyes wide at his startling reaction to her harmless question, "I guess not..." She puts her hand on Cody's back, ushering him down their own walk-way and up the stairs that lead to their front door. She frowns in confusion, wondering what put Paul in such a bad mood but not really caring to ask after his hostile actions. She can feel him burning a hole in the side of her head with his vicious glare, so she pastes a false smile on her face and waves, calling across their yards to him, "Welcome home, asshole!"

**.**

The Sunday following Paul's early return to La Push, Lena decides to conquer the first of the three paintings she must complete before returning to school the last week of August. She sets up her easel on the back porch, since it's drizzling outside and she can't very well paint in the rain, and spreads out her brand new bottles of paint on the little plastic table so she can decide which colors to use. She's picked the stone wishing well that sits in her backyard, which her parents got as a wedding gift from Simon's parents nineteen years ago, as her drawing subject. The stones of the well are different shapes and shades of gray and taupe, and the wooden roof of the well is brown, as is the bucket which hangs from a spool in the center. Carved into the roof of the well are the words 'Wishing you many years of sunshine, laughter, and love!' with a heart underneath, and inside the heart are the letters S &amp; W. Normally, Lena likes to choose subjects which are colorful and bright, but she wants to challenge herself, so that's why she picked the wishing well.

When Lena begins to paint, she allows herself to get lost in her work, determined to finish once she's started. She knows some people can take a break from a painting and come back to it at a later time or date, but she loses her creative focus when she does that, so she prefers to get it all done in one sitting. In art class, they are only given a short amount of time to work on a piece each day, and while she can work that way, Lena thinks her best paintings are the ones she completes the same day she starts. This is why two and a half hours seem to pass in the blink of an eye, and when Lena pauses briefly it isn't by choice, but because her attention was ripped away from the canvas in front of her.

It had been very, very quiet, aside from the drip-drip-drip of raindrops falling softly on the roof above her head, which was kind of soothing, but the silence is broken by a loud yell from the house next door. What sounds like, "Just shut up already!" reaches Lena's ears a moment before a massive _BOOM_ echoes across the yard. Lena is so startled, she nearly ruins her entire painting with a misplaced brush-stroke, but she catches herself in time. She places the brush down and leans to the left so she can peer around her easel, trying to figure out what caused that loud noise. It doesn't take long to connect the dots; Paul is standing just outside his back door, which he probably flung open so fast that it slammed into the house, and it was most likely him who yelled just before that, and now he's visibly shaking in anger as he clenches and un-clenches his fists together.

Lena hasn't talked to Paul since he arrived home on Wednesday, and she can't really consider that a conversation since it was so one-sided, but it looks like he hasn't gotten any less mad than he was the day he returned. He wasn't scheduled to work this weekend, since he told Simon he wouldn't be home until today, so that explains what he's doing home. Lena supposes it's a good thing River was still set to work, because her dad would not tolerate Paul behaving so immaturely in his store. Sure, she doesn't know what's upset him so much, but that's not really an excuse for acting like a violent psychopath. He proves her point half-a-second later when he sends his fist flying into a harmless nearby tree.

"Oh my God!" Lena cries out, unable to bite her tongue in time, "What is wrong with you?" She wasn't going to say anything to him at all, seeing how well things went last time, but she couldn't help herself. Who punches a _tree?! _Like, hello, that's definitely going to hurt, and what did the damn tree ever do to Paul?

She immediately regrets speaking though, when Paul turns to her, barely seeming fazed by the pain he must be feeling in his hand, and shouts, "You can shut the fuck up too, Lena!"

Now she's mad. She sends Paul the nastiest glare she can muster and yells to him, "Why don't _you_ shut up? You're the one screaming and banging things around and punching trees like a lunatic!"

If Paul were a cartoon character, there would literally be steam blowing out of his ears at this point. His face would be beet red, and he'd probably have a creepy vein bulging to a bursting point above his eyebrow. The thing is, he's not a cartoon character, and it's considerably less funny to see someone so angry in real life. His lip is curled up in an ugly sneer, hands held together in tight fists, arm muscles so tense they look like they might tear his shirt in two, and with every breath he takes his body starts to shake that much more. Lena has never seen someone convulsing so badly simply because they were mad. She honestly thinks he might explode in a moment if he doesn't find a way to calm down.

"Paul!" Mr. Lahote orders from just inside the doorway of their home, "Get lost! Go! Walk it off or something!"

Lena holds her breath, watching from her seat behind the easel as Paul considers his father's words. She doesn't think for a moment he'll listen, especially since he's still staring at her with such hatred in his eyes she might as well have killed his puppy or something. But then he turns and stomps into the woods, shoving tree branches out of his way as he goes. Even after he's disappeared, Lena can't stop staring at the spot he was standing before. _What is wrong with him? _She wonders, unable to think of anything else, _Why is he so damn angry? _

Fifteen minutes pass, and Lena still can't re-focus her attention on her painting of the wishing well. She sighs loudly and gathers up her paints and brushes to go inside, leaving the canvas on the easel to dry. So much for finishing her first of the art assignments. She knows it's ridiculous, but for some reason she is in a bad mood for the whole rest of the day.

* * *

Author's Note: Raise your hand if you think Paul ran off and had his first transformation? Cookies for you guys :)

Please Review! Let me know what you're thinking, I always appreciate your comments and suggestions :)

Next chapter will be posted soon.


	9. Chapter 9

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 9! I was happy to see a few more followers added, and a few more faves, so thanks for that. I hope you continue to enjoy the story :) This is the longest chapter to date, so I hope that is appreciated.

I want to thank my 11 reviewers from last chapter: WriteAndDream23, hayhay196, twilight85fan, misswinterjayne, JinLing, Guest, jace4ever, Seldomlaughs, Laura, Micky-Moo &amp; Lapushwolfpack! Thank you so much! Your comments really made me smile, and I'm so glad you're continuing to enjoy Lena as a character. I feel the love, and I'm going to try and keep updating frequently for you lovely readers :)

* * *

**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**9\. Is It By Mistake Or Design?**

Thursday night, Winona Fawling decides to take her daughters Camille and Maya for a trip to visit her parents, who live on the Hoh Reservation a little over an hour to the south, for the weekend. She originally wanted all of her children to join her since they don't make the trip to her hometown very often, but Cody has soccer practice and a game the following two days, Lena has to work on Saturday, and Forrest simply doesn't want to go. Of course, her husband can't even accompany her since one of them has to stay and run the Market all day Friday and the first-half of Saturday. Perhaps Simon will join her for the night after he leaves work on Saturday. It would be nice for the whole family to take an actual vacation together, but they simply can't afford to do so since it would mean the Market would have to be closed while they were away.

Simon and Lena arrive home after closing up the Market at almost eight-thirty, missing Winona and the girls' departure by about forty-five minutes. Lena is heating up left-overs for herself and her dad to eat for dinner when there is a knock on the front door. Cody, as usual, runs to answer it.

From the kitchen, Lena can hear a deep voice question her brother, "Hey kid, is your sister home?"

"Which one?" Cody cleverly replies, even though only one of his three sisters is home at the moment.

Lena frowns, trying to pinpoint the voice of the man at the door. When he says her name, "Lena," she suddenly knows who it is: Paul's father, Mr. Lahote. _What is he doing here? _

"Lena!" Cody yells, a bad habit that all little boys seem to have, "Mr. Lahote is at the door!" His bare feet can be heard running down the hallway and back into the den, where he is watching his last show before bedtime. Even in the summer, Simon and Winona are firm on Maya and Cody being in bed by nine o'clock. Cammie, who is a few years older, is allowed to stay up until ten, and Forrest and Lena aren't given a bedtime restriction since they are old enough to determine how much sleep they need on a given night.

After pulling the leftover fish out of the hot oven to prevent it from burning in her absence, Lena walks to the door, which Cody left wide open. Eli Lahote is standing just outside, tall and intimidating and much like Lena imagines Paul will look someday in the future, seeming unsure of himself. He attempts to smile at Lena, but it comes out as more of a grimace. He doesn't stink of booze though, and he appears sober, so that comes as both a shock and a relief to Lena.

"Hi, Mr. Lahote," Lena greets politely, before trailing off, unsure what to say next. 'Is everything okay?' 'What can I do for you?' 'What brings you to my front door?' None of those seem acceptable to her. She's debating whether or not she should invite him inside when he speaks.

"Hi Lena, sorry to bother you. I was hoping you could tell me when you last saw my son?" He shifts his weight from left foot to right, a clear sign of impatience and nerves.

"Paul?" Lena questions dumbly. _Of course he means Paul; that's his only kid! _She thinks back to the last time she saw Paul, which was Sunday afternoon when he went all Incredible Hulk on the trees in his backyard. "I haven't seen him since Sunday. Why?" Now is an appropriate time for one of her earlier questions, "Is everything okay?"

"Oh," Eli seems disappointed. He takes a step backward, hooking his hands together behind his back and looking over to his yard, where Paul's truck is parked. "Okay. You're sure?" He stares down at Lena with dark eyes, lips pursed together in a firm line.

"Yes, I'm sure," Lena assures him. She takes a guess, "He hasn't been home?"

"No, not since he took off Sunday," Mr. Lahote confirms. "His truck is still here though. I don't know where he could be."

Lena frowns, finding it odd Paul would choose to be away from home for five days without bothering to tell his father. It's not something he's ever done before, she doesn't believe. At least, it's the first time his father has come knocking on her door wondering of his whereabouts. "Have you tried any of his friends? Max Jacobs or...Danny Weber?" She can't remember the name of the third goon Paul is always hanging out with, even though they've been going to the same school for close to ten years. She knows he's a year older, and he and Paul play football together, but she can't for the life of her recall his name.

"I called Max," Mr. Lahote explains, "He hasn't heard from Paul all week. None of the boys have."

Now Lena is starting to get worried for her neighbor. What if something happened to him? He was so angry, it's hard to predict where he could have gone after walking into the woods. What kind of trouble did he get himself into? Where could he be? "I'm sorry I haven't seen him. If I do, I will let you know. I hope he comes home soon," She says sincerely.

"Thank you, Lena." Mr. Lahote takes his leave and Lena closes the door behind him.

"What was that about?" Simon asks abruptly, having just stepped out of his bedroom after a quick shower and catching the tail-end of the conversation.

Lena whirls around, "Oh, Dad. You scared me. Um. I guess Paul hasn't been home in a few days. Mr. Lahote was just wondering if I'd seen him."

"Well?" Her father prompts, "Have you?"

"No," Lena says defensively, "That's what I told him."

"Hmph," Her dad grunts, turning towards the kitchen where he smells his dinner waiting for him, seeming pretty sure of himself when he comments, "He'll turn up eventually."

**.**

Lena's dad was right, Paul did turn up, and only a few days later, too. It was after a strange thing happened, though; on Saturday, Sam Uley came into Fawling Market and said that Paul wouldn't be in this weekend because he was sick. It's weird because Lena didn't think Paul was friends with Sam Uley, or that the guy would have the guts to come into the place where his ex-girlfriend works, _during _her work hours no less, and right after he made things official with Leah's cousin too. Lena still can't believe that. He broke up with Leah only to ask out her cousin? What a piece of work. Anyways, Aunt Shayna was a little confused why Paul couldn't call himself and say he was out sick, but she accepted the excuse and sent Sam on his way. It wasn't then that Paul turned up, because Lena checked in with his dad when she got home from work that night and he still hadn't heard from Paul. The fact that Paul wasn't at home made Sam's earlier visit to the Market even stranger; if he were really sick, wouldn't he be at home in bed? It was Sunday, Sunday night to be exact, that Paul returned home for the first time in a full week.

Lena was in her bedroom on the phone with River when she heard what sounded like a wolf howling from the woods behind her house. She paused in conversation, turned off the lamp on her nightstand, and opened the curtain so she could look outside. She didn't see anything, so she opened the curtain on the other side of her bed as well, the one facing the Lahote's house, since there are a few trees in between their houses. There weren't any wild animals out there, as far as she could tell.

"Lena?" River asked after the phone went silent, "Are you still there?"

"Yeah, sorry," Lena excused herself, "I just thought I heard a wolf or something."

"Do we have wolves around here?" River had chuckled, never having seen one herself.

"Probably; I don't know," Lena replied, thinking of the bears and foxes and other wild animals people have had confirmed sightings of in the nearby areas, "But that's what it sounded like."

As soon as she spoke those words, something caught her eye, moving stealthily through the trees behind her house, in the direction of the Lahote's house. Lena moved to the other window, pressing her face closer to the glass for a better view. "What is that?" She'd whispered.

"What's what?" River demanded, annoyed that her cousin is distracting her from the scary movie on TV. They had both been watching together - well, on the phone with each other - until Lena decided she was too tired to stay awake for the conclusion and went upstairs to change into her pajamas. Lena wanted to hang up, but River doesn't like to watch scary movies alone, so she convinced Lena to stay on the line a little longer, just until the movie was over.

Lena squinted her eyes as she willed them to see better in the dark. Then she saw it - or _him, _rather - and she nearly died from the shock. There was Paul, she noticed, completely _naked, _walking through his backyard. He had a hand cupped over his junk, but besides that he appeared pretty casual and comfortable strolling around in the nude at close to midnight. When he finally stepped out of the shadow of the trees and into the moonlight, Lena nearly choked on her laughter as she observed his bare ass cheeks. He finally reached his bedroom window and began to slide it open so he could crawl inside. Lena was laughing so hard at this point, her imagination going wild with possible scenarios of how he'd lost his clothes, she had tears rolling down her cheeks.

"What is it?" River pestered some more, not even focused on the movie anymore, "What is so funny, Lee?"

"Paul," Lena finally replied once she was able to catch her breath, "He-he's -" She can't complete the sentence without bursting into loud peals of laughter. "He just -"

"You suck," River stated, "I can't understand anything you're saying. Call me tomorrow." Then she hung up.

Lena tossed her phone on her pillow and quickly turned back to her window, not wanting to miss her opportunity. She unlatched the lock and slid open the window a few inches, just wide enough to let out a long, low whistle and the words, "I had no idea there was a _full moon _tonight!" She bit her lip as she waited for his reaction.

Paul had finally gotten the window open, but he froze. He was smart enough not to whirl around and flash her the rest of his goods, but he had definitely been caught, in the nude. If he were anybody else, he might have been mortified. But he was Paul Lahote; he knew he had a damn fine birthday suit and he wasn't shy about showing it off. He didn't even bother to look over his shoulder since he knew he'd find Lena grinning cheekily at him from her window on the second floor of her house. He casually tossed her the middle finger and her shoulders shook with laughter as he quickly hopped inside and closed his window, and the curtains too, for good measure. He knew his neighbor would have plenty of questions to ask him the next time he saw her, but he was too tired to worry about that right then. All he wanted to do was go to sleep...for the next week, or more.

That happened almost a full week ago, and Lena hasn't seen Paul since. She isn't sure what to say when she does see him, since today is Saturday, and he's due to walk through the doors of the Market any minute now to begin his shift. That is, if he shows up. She hasn't had a real conversation with Paul since before he left for his visit to Tacoma, and since he's been back she'd been on the receiving end of his nastiest glare - _twice _\- and then caught him streaking in the dark. She doesn't have a clue what to think about that, and this is why she isn't sure what to say or how to act when Paul comes in; should she be mad at him for being a jerk a couple weeks ago, or should she laugh at him for what she saw last Sunday night? It's a tough decision to make.

"What's up?" Leah asks as she passes by Lena's register for the third time this hour and catches the girl staring at the Market entrance again.

"Huh?" Lena blinks, turning her attention to the taller brunette in surprise, "What do you mean?"

"You've been watching the doors like a hawk," Leah points out with a shrug. "Waiting for a special visitor?" She rolls her dark eyes, hoping the Call kid isn't stopping by to do something cutesy for Lena. She doesn't want to witness any couple doing anything mushy or romantic right now. Love is mean, and it sucks, and it hurts, and anyone who believes otherwise is a blind idiot. According to Leah, that is.

"No," Lena denies, busying herself by checking the plastic and paper bags at the end of her register. She's a little low on the plastic ones, so she'll have to run to the back to re-stock. "Just really bored, I guess," Lena elaborates, motioning around to the fairly empty supermarket. She knows it would probably make Leah laugh if she told her about Paul's naked adventure the other night, and lord knows Leah could use a good laugh after everything she's been through recently, but Lena doesn't tell her. She wants to ask Paul herself what exactly he was doing, and pissing him off by giving Leah new material to tease him incessantly about won't help her get any answers. Since Leah looks pretty bored herself, Lena requests, "Can you watch my register real quick so I can run to the back for more bags?"

"I guess," Leah agrees with a sigh, stepping behind Lena's register to replace her while she's gone.

"Thanks," Lena calls over her shoulder as she heads towards the back of the store. In the storage room located right beside the office, Lena easily finds the supply of plastic bags and grabs a good amount to fill the empty slots of her bagging station. She thinks about it for a moment and decides to grab another handful, in case the other register is short on bags as well. She closes the storage room door behind her as she exits, checking the handle to ensure it is locked, and sticks the key back on the hook that hangs just inside the office door, flashing her aunt a smile as she does. Shayna lifts her eyes from her work for a moment, just long enough to smile back, and then resumes checking the supply order list for the upcoming week.

When Lena returns to the front of the store, the first thing she notices is that Paul has finally arrived, since he's standing with his back facing her while he talks to Leah. The second thing she notices, aside from the fact that's he's late as usual, is that he's not in uniform; instead, he's wearing blue jeans and a white t-shirt, which is clinging tightly to his new-formed muscles. The Fawling Market uniform consists of khaki pants or black slacks and a white polo shirt which has 'Fawling Market' printed above the left-breast pocket in black bold-faced font. In the summer, they are allowed to wear khaki capris or shorts, as long as they aren't too short, and so both girls are wearing shorts along with their uniform polo shirts.

"Get over yourself, Leah," Paul is saying when Lena gets close enough to hear him, "Sam's world doesn't revolve around you, as much as you'd like it to."

"Fuck you," Leah snaps back, her dark eyes flashing with anger. She sees Lena and immediately steps away from the register, and Paul, stating, "I'm going on a cart run." Without waiting for a response, she stalks outside to gather stray grocery carts and bring them back to the front of the store.

Lena rolls her eyes, thinking to herself that she should have known Leah and Paul talking would result in one of them getting angry and stomping off. "Nice job," She tells Paul sarcastically as she steps around him to deposit the plastic bags in their proper place, "Now she's going to be pissed for the rest of the day." After freeing her hands, she looks to Paul to tell him with her usual smug smirk, "You're late. And what's with the..." She loses her train of thought when her eyes lock with Paul's and an intense staring match ensues. What surprises her most is not the tingle of electricity that runs down her spine as soon as their eyes meet, but the warm, fuzzy feeling that starts in her chest and spreads to the rest of her body. She suddenly has the strong desire to wrap her arms around him in a hug and never let go. But then she realizes she hasn't blinked in a scary long time, she's staring at _Paul_, and she must not have gotten enough sleep last night if she's seriously considering pressing her body that close to his. _Uh, that's Paul, _she tells her confused body, _stop acting weird. _She pulls herself together enough to finish her previous question, "What's with the clothes?"

"What?" Is the only word that comes to mind when Paul opens his mouth to speak. He has no idea what just occurred between himself and Lena Fawling, but he does know that _something _happened, and it was a big something. He thought he'd learned all he needed to know about being a wolf after he phased for the first time nearly two weeks ago and Sam Uley and Jared Cameron showed up to explain things to him, but clearly they left something out. Why else would looking at Lena's face suddenly make him feel like he just won the lottery, if not for some freaky wolf side-effect? He looked into her wide, chocolate brown eyes and something inside of him snapped; it was like he forgot who he was for a moment, and this foreign voice within him decided, 'She's mine', and now everything has changed. A split-second was all it took for him to lose himself completely and then find himself again in Lena's eyes. _What the fuck? _The sane, non-wolf part of his brain is wondering, _What kind of messed up wolf trick is this? _

Lena smiles as Paul's eyebrows crinkle up in confusion, and she decides that he looks rather adorable when he doesn't know the answer to a question; so maybe that's why she accepted the job of being his tutor a few months ago, and not for the reasons she told herself she did. "I said," Lena repeats herself, "What's with the clothes? You're not in your uniform, in case you hadn't noticed." She takes a few steps forward, in his direction, before leaning her hip against the outer counter of her register. From this close, she can really see how much bigger he's gotten in the past six weeks, almost like he's transformed into a whole new person, but she decides that his face is still the same; at least, she thinks it is. _Was he really always this handsome? _Lena ponders, trying to recall how she'd never noticed before now that he's got the face of a..._Oh my God, _she catches herself staring again and abruptly turns her head towards the entrance of the Market, forcing it to stay there as she mentally berates herself, _What is wrong with you?! Stop staring at him like you've never seen him before! He lives next door, for goodness' sake! He's the same Paul he's always been and he is _not _that good looking! _She hopes he doesn't notice the pink tinge in her cheeks, which she tells herself is only because she's embarrassed she got caught staring at him in the first place.

"Oh," Paul glances down at his outfit, "Yeah. I..." How does he explain this? "Uh, I need a new shirt. My old one doesn't fit anymore."

Lena's eyes dart back towards Paul, lingering on his bulging biceps and sculpted chest. She feels flustered as her cheeks flush even further, and she wishes Leah would hurry with the carts and get back inside to distract her from herself. She's suddenly too hot and can't think straight. She does, however, manage to reply, "I'll tell my dad. He can...order another one."

"Thanks," Paul says, watching Lena carefully. If she thought he hadn't noticed her eyes scanning his body or the blush that accompanied the action, she was completely wrong. He noticed, and he feels strangely satisfied knowing that standing so close to her isn't only affecting himself, but her too. He just wishes he knew _why. _

Lena hears the wheels of a grocery cart being pushed in their direction, and so she attempts to slip past Paul to stand behind her register, only when she moves so does he, and he blocks her path. "What are you doing?" She asks breathlessly, feeling even warmer than she felt a few seconds ago. Concluding that it must be Paul, she glances up at his face in concern. "Are you all right?" She reaches out and runs the back of her hand along his forehead, gasping in surprise at the scorching temperature he's harboring. "Oh my God, Paul, you're burning up!"

She is about to suggest that he go home to bed, since he's clearly still too sick to be at work, when Tiffany Call approaches Lena's register with a cart full of groceries. Lena hastily removes her hand from Paul's head and takes a giant step away from the vicinity of his body, feeling guilty, almost like she was caught doing something very wrong. She knows she wasn't, doing anything wrong, that is, but it doesn't make her any less guilty. She had forgotten about Embry the entire time she was talking with Paul, and that is highly unusual. She had forgotten him so completely that if someone had asked her a few moments ago about him, she might have replied, 'Embry who?' and that is a scary thought. Maybe she's caught whatever sickness has been ailing Paul and that is why she feels so strange. It's the only explanation she can come up with at the moment, and it does help appease her guilt some.

"Tiffany," Lena greets her boyfriend's mother with a wide smile, hoping it doesn't appear fake, "I didn't see you come in. How are you?"

"I'm doing well, thank you," Tiffany replies, beginning to place her food items on the checkout counter for Lena to ring up. "I had lunch with your mother today. She says you finished a stunning painting of the well in your backyard last week."

"I did," Lena nods, happy to hear that her mom liked the painting enough to tell her best friend about it, "It took me a little over a week to finish, but I am finally done with it."

"Well, I would love to see it sometime," Tiffany tells her, "And you know, you are more than welcome to bring your art supplies over with you and paint at the house any time you want."

"Thank you," Lena says, thinking that she might take up Tiffany's offer soon, since Embry lives so close to the beach and she'd surely be able to find a nice subject to paint.

"So..." Tiffany prompts with a wry smile as she hands Lena the amount due for the groceries, "Are you getting excited for next weekend?"

Paul, who had been bagging groceries as an excuse to stay close to Lena for the time being, finds his interest is piqued by this Tiffany woman's words. _What is next weekend? _He wants to ask her, but then the two ladies' attention would be drawn to him, and he's not exactly doing one of his normal job duties at the moment, so he bites his tongue. He'll have to figure out what she means from Lena's response.

Lena raises her eyebrows in surprise, not expecting Tiffany to have remembered that next Saturday is she and Embry's 2 Year Anniversary, especially since she nearly forgot herself. _I really must be getting sick..._She once again finds herself pasting what she hopes is a believable smile on her face as she answers, "Of course I'm excited. I've been working on Embry's present for over a month now. He better like it." She thinks about the scrapbook of pictures she's been putting together for her boyfriend, feeling her smile melt into an actual true smile since she knows Embry is going to love it.

_Embry's present? _Paul loads the bags into the cart as he wonders, _Is it his birthday or something? I thought that already happened..._

"I'm sure he will," Tiffany assures the younger girl, "He's made something for you as well. Are you working, or did you take the night off?"

"I still have to work," Lena says, slightly disappointed, "There's not really anyone to cover my shift since it's our busiest day. But once I get out at seven, I am free all night." She passes Tiffany her change and a receipt for the groceries.

Tiffany pockets the money, explaining briefly, "Well, I'm giving Embry the car for the night, so expect him to be here when you get out. He has plans to bring you somewhere special." She winks, not willing to divulge any further information on the subject. "I should get home so I can start dinner, but it was nice talking with you, Lena."

Paul slowly connects the dots as Lena waves goodbye to Embry's mother, and he recalls her mentioning that she and Embry had their anniversary approaching. That was before he went away to Tacoma, so he's assuming that's what next Saturday is. _Fucking Embry Call, _Paul shakes his head, _How could I forget? _Lena isn't his at all, she's Embry's, and he's...well, he's an idiot for allowing this freakish wolf side-effect to trick him into...whatever it is he's feeling for Lena right now. He can feel a frown forming on his face, and anger spreading through his veins, and he knows that if he doesn't get a grip he's going to lose it and explode into a giant wolf inside Fawling Market. He tries to calm down, like Sam has been teaching him, but thinking about Sam only makes him angrier. Sam is the reason he's so confused right now! Sam said being a shape-shifter makes him important, that it's his duty to protect the pack from their mortal enemies - _vampires - _and that he'd have to learn to control himself because it is to remain a secret from everyone except the shifters themselves and the elders. Sam never said he'd become strangely territorial over his next-door-neighbor, that he'd see her and claim her as his own without any consent from himself or her, or that it would make him angrier than anything to think of Embry kissing Lena or touching her or...He needs to figure out what the hell is wrong with him.

"Paul," Lena calls out as she sees him darting towards the doors that lead outside, "Where are you going?"

He hesitates when he hears her voice, only long enough to turn back to her and say, "I can't stay. I have to get out of here."

"What do you mean?" Lena asks his back in confusion as he's already turned away, "Why can't you stay?"

Paul doesn't turn back again though, he keeps walking until he's exited the building and then he runs to the woods. Lena stands and stares at the spot he was previously occupying and is confused by the disappointment seeping through her. Why should she care if Paul is ditching work again? Sure, her father isn't going to be happy, but that's no reason to kill her mood. It does though, it truly brings her down, and for the rest of her shift she watches the door and waits for Paul to return, but he never comes.

* * *

Author's Note: There you have it, folks! Paul is officially a wolf, and he has officially imprinted on Lena. How did I do? I thought it'd be interesting for him not to have been told about imprinting just yet, so he's almost as confused as Lena is about the whole thing. I'd love to hear your comments and suggestions about what you'd like to see happen next, so please, please review! :)

**Seldomlaughs **is hoping I won't give Embry a big heartache when Lena finally realizes what is going on between her and Paul, so I am going to just say that there will be equal amounts of heartache all around...and I'll leave it at that for now ;) I'm a strong believer in happy endings though, so hopefully that puts your mind at ease a bit.

Next chapter will be posted by next Tuesday, if not before. Thanks again for reading!


	10. Chapter 10

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 10! I was glad to hear most of you liked that Paul didn't know about the imprint before it happened. I thought it'd make things a little more interesting ;) I figured since Paul is the 3rd to phase, Sam wouldn't have the whole Alpha thing down to a science just yet, especially since in my story, Jared has not yet imprinted on Kim.

I want to thank my 6 reviewers from last chapter: WriteAndDream23, Micky-Moo, twilight85fan, jace4ever, &amp; 2 guests! Thank you so much for your feedback, I will definitely keep your suggestions in mind. I have considered having Embry phase earlier in the story than he does in the actual book/movie, but I am still deciding...I guess we will all find out eventually :)

WARNING: In case you didn't notice, I have changed the Rating of this story from T to M! I have realized there are more swears than I originally intended, and things are going to get more mature in content in the upcoming chapters, so I want to make sure it is appropriately rated in advance. Thanks!

* * *

**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**10\. Light of Your Life, Fire of Your Loins**

"What the Hell, Sam?" Paul demands to know once he's calmed down for long enough to return to his human body and found his way through the woods to the Uley household, where Sam was waiting for him out back to explain all he knew about imprinting, "Why didn't you tell me about this before? Why would you keep this from me? Don't you think I deserved to know this would happen to me?"

"I'm sorry," Sam replies calmly, knowing how confused and conflicted his pack mate is feeling, because he's been there before himself. He was the first to phase, and he had to learn on his own what happened to him, and when he thought he'd figured out everything he needed to know about being a wolf, he saw Emily and imprinted on her. It was the hardest part about the whole thing, because not only did he have a girlfriend at the time whom he loved, he found his soul-mate in the form of his girlfriend's _cousin. _"It wasn't my intention to keep anything from you. Imprinting is...complicated, and we don't even know all there is to know about it. I guess I wasn't thinking it would happen to you so quickly."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Paul asks accusingly, his nostrils flaring in anger.

Sam rolls his eyes at Paul's easy temper flare-up, suggesting sharply, "Calm down. I only meant that Jared phased for the first time in late April, and he hasn't imprinted yet, so I had time to explain things to him slower. It freaked him out as it was, and with you being such a hot-head, I wanted to give you some time to accept what you are before I told you there was more. I was hoping you'd have time to learn how to control yourself, because it's dangerous for you to be around your imprint when your phasing is still unpredictable. You saw what I did to Emily when I lost control..." Sam trails off momentarily, the guilt of the incident still so fresh in his mind that it chokes him up. Emily, his Emily, was permanently scarred, and it was all his fault. He isn't sure he can ever forgive himself for what he did, even if Emily says she already has. "...I can't let anything like that happen again."

Paul recalls what happened the day Sam accidentally phased too close to Emily and nearly killed her like it happened only last week; that's because it _did_ happen just over a week ago. Obviously at the time, Paul didn't know Emily was Sam's imprint, and he'd only just discovered he possessed the shape-shifting gene not even a full week before, so it was a lot to handle all at once. Now that he knows what Emily means to Sam, and why he was too upset to phase back to human form because his guilt was too overwhelming, Paul isn't sure he wants to take on that kind of responsibility. "What am I supposed to do now?" Paul asks his alpha, "How do I make it go away?"

"Make what go away?" Sam asks in confusion, unable to connect the dots straight away. When Paul sends him an impatient look, Sam says in astonishment, "The imprint? Paul, you can't make it go away. It's not reversible. Once you imprint, that's it; you're theirs for life. There's nothing you can do to break the bond."

"That can't be true," Paul argues stubbornly, "It has to be a mistake. Lena can't be my...imprint, or whatever." He mumbles the word, finding it to be strange and foreign as it comes out of his mouth.

"Lena?" Sam repeats, "Lena Fawling? Her family owns the supermarket?" Paul had said it was his neighbor, but he hadn't said her name until now.

"Yeah," Paul confirms, "And she's also Embry Call's girlfriend. They've been together forever. Their moms have practically planned their whole lives out for them already; they might as well be betrothed." He shakes his head, feeling disgusted by the idea. He always thought it was amusing that Lena's mom and Embry's mom played matchmaker for them, hoping to bring their two families together one day, but now he thinks it was unfair of them to have such high expectations. What if things didn't work out between them? Then they'd have to deal with their mothers' disappointment along with their own hurt feelings. Not only that, but La Push isn't a very big town, and there are so many gossiping losers that everyone would talk about the break-up, if it were to happen, each speculating as to who dumped who and why and what would happen now. And Paul realizes that none of that even matters because Embry and Lena will never break up. It's a fact.

"It's not the first time an imprint has ruined a relationship," Sam reminds Paul, thinking of Leah, "And it probably won't be the last." He has been talking with the tribe's elders recently, and they have predictions as to who is most likely to join the pack sometime in the near future; Jacob Black and Quil Ateara being two of the likely candidates. He imagines imprinting won't become any less complicated for the pack, but he does have high hopes it will work out for each of them in the end. After all, things are slowly coming together for him and Emily, and if he still has a chance after mauling her face then the bond between an imprinter and his imprintee must be stronger than any of them can imagine. "It happened for a reason, Paul, trust in that."

"You don't know Lena," Paul states, "I've lived next door to her since I was eight years old. She loved Embry even back then; she told me she was going to marry him one day and have his babies. She's never been interested in any guy except for him. And all I've ever been to her is the dumb kid next door with a drunk for a dad, and if I told her she's supposed to be my..." He can't bring himself to say the word imprint again, or soul-mate or perfect match or anything of that nature, so he simply waves his hand and grunts out an indecipherable word, "Eh, she'd probably punch me in my face. Then she'd go and tell Embry, because she tells him _everything_, and he'd want to punch me in my face too. I mean, I doubt he'd do much damage, but if I kick his ass Lena will just hate me. And I'll probably lose my job, and she won't ever speak to me again. Do you see how this is not going to work out, Sam? What's the point of all this? There has to be a way to get rid of it."

"I already told you, there's not," Sam reiterates, "You're just going to have to accept it, Paul. From what Emily's told me, the imprint isn't one-sided, so you're not the only one feeling it's side-effects. Emily said that when she's with me she feels happy, warm, and just...right. When I'm not with her, she says she feels like something is missing. Maybe she won't realize what's happening at first, but Lena will be happier when she's around you, and when she figures it out-"

"She'll fight it," Paul cuts the older male off, sounding decidedly sure of himself, "She won't just give in, Sam. I know her. She'll play it off as a joke, or keep her distance, or deny it - anything but admit that she actually feels anything for _me. _That is if she even feels anything at all."

When Sam replies, he seems just as sure, "She will."

"Maybe I don't want her to!" Paul says stubbornly, although his mind immediately disagrees with him. As inconvenient as this whole imprinting process has been, he can't help feeling lucky that he has found a match in Lena. He could have done a hell of a lot worse, even if it's going to be hard convincing her Embry isn't truly The One for her. Maybe it's the whole imprint thing messing with his head, because he's never thought about Lena like this before now, or any girl for that matter, but he can picture a future with Lena. He can imagine him making her happy, and vice versa, spending all their free time together like she does with Embry now, and it's kind of freaking him out how badly he wants to go back to Fawling Market right now so he can see her again.

"Well, you can tell me if you still feel that way after a few weeks of keeping your distance from her," Sam shares his decision in an authoritative tone, knowing it will be hard for Paul but is also what he thinks is necessary. He meant it when he told Paul he couldn't let what happened to Emily happen to anyone else, and he doesn't trust Paul just yet not to lose control because the kid is unpredictable. He will have to prove he can keep his anger in check if he wants Sam to let him pursue Lena Fawling.

"What?" Paul is sure Sam can't be serious. "How am I supposed to do that? We work together. She lives right next door."

"I didn't say you can't _see_ Lena," Sam points out, "I just said you have to keep your distance. You'll have to change your work schedule for now so you aren't tempted to talk to her. You might see her when she's at home, but don't approach her. Until you can control yourself, the best thing for her is to be away from you. It's going to be hard, but that should make you work harder to learn control."

**.**

Late Saturday night, Lena hears a wolf howling for the fourth or fifth time in the past couple weeks, and she wonders if it has decided to make a home in the woods behind her house. It's strange, because she thought they were more common up north, and not so close to the ocean, but she knows what she heard and it was positively a wolf. This time, she's not alone.

Her door swings open and bangs against the wall as both her sisters tumble into the room. Camille asks Lena, dark brown eyes wide with excitement, "Did you hear that?"

Immediately after her, Maya adds, bouncing up and down on her feet, "The wolf! Did you hear, Lena? Did you?"

Lena frowns at the sudden intrusion, reminding the two younger girls, "You're supposed to _knock _before you come running in here." Upon realizing the time, she says, "And you're both supposed to be in bed right now."

Camille sighs, obviously disappointed that Lena hadn't answered her original question. "Sorry," She mumbles, mostly for not knocking before entering the room, not because she isn't in bed yet. Their parents had gone to Port Angeles for late dinner and a movie and left Lena in charge of her siblings, so Camille and Maya had decided to have a dance party. Until they heard the wolf, of course, and then they forgot they were supposed to be sleeping and had to come into Lena's room, since she has the best view of the backyard from her window, to see if she heard it as well.

"But did you hear the wolf?" Maya pesters some more, a slight pout on her little lips.

"Yes," Lena concedes, "I heard it." As soon as the words left her mouth, Cammie and Maya squealed and leapt onto the bed so they could look out the back window, which overlooks the backyard and the woods beyond. Lena allows them to lift the curtain and press their faces to the glass before raining on their parade with a few simple words, "You're not going to see anything, it's too dark out."

"The moon is out," Maya observes, pointing to the waning crescent moon, a small glowing sliver in the otherwise dark night sky. "You think that's why he's howling?"

"No," Cammie says with a roll of her eyes, beginning to get impatient with her younger sister after spending a whole night playing nicely, "They only howl at the full moon."

"Then why's he howling?" Maya wonders.

"Because," Lena says in an ominous voice, reaching behind her to flick off the light switch, "Wolves can sense when little girls who should be sleeping are still awake, and it makes them very..._very_...hungry!" She lunges at the bed and starts tickling Maya and Cammie, who began screaming the second the room was flooded with darkness.

"No!" Maya shouts, "Don't let us get eaten, Lena! We'll be good, I swear!"

Chuckling, Lena rises to her feet and turns on the light once more. "All right," She says with a grin, "I guess I won't let the big, bad wolf eat you. Now go back to your room and go to sleep. I mean it. I'm coming in to check on you in ten minutes, and you both better be asleep."

Maya nods solemnly, slipping her hand into Camille's slightly larger one. "Okay," Cammie agrees, "We will." The taller girl squeezes the shorter one's hand and leads the way out of Lena's bedroom and across the hall to their own.

After they've gone, Lena waits ten minutes, as promised, before exiting her room to check on them. She stops at the boys' room first, lightly tapping on the door before cracking it open and peeking inside. Forrest looks over at her questioningly from his seat at the computer desk, where he's playing a game with his headphones on. It's no wonder he hadn't heard all the squealing and come out to see what was happening. On the opposite side of the room, Cody is sleeping soundly on the lower bed of the boys' bunk beds, which is his designated spot. He is laying flat on his back, arms above his head on either side of his pillow. Lena creeps over and adjusts his blankets, to ensure he'll be warm. Then she waves to Forrest and exits the room as quietly as she entered.

Outside the girls' room, she presses her ear against the door and listens intently for any whispers or noises that might give them away as being awake still. When she hears nothing, she slowly turns the doorknob and pushes it open, stepping inside the mostly dark bedroom. The only light comes from the soft yellow glow of a star-shaped nightlight plugged into the wall by the girls' bunk bed. Surprisingly, both of her sisters are laying in the same bed, and even more surprisingly, they are asleep. Cammie has dragged her pillow and comforter down from the top bunk and arranged Maya's horde of stuffed animals to surround their bodies, like an army of plush protectors to guard them while they sleep. Maya is curled up at Cammie's side, her hair still up in two messy pigtails, and dressed in a puffy pink princess dress made of tulle. Cammie is wearing purple sparkly leggings, a lime green mini-skirt, and a purple tank top of Lena's that she hadn't noticed was missing. She also must have gotten into Lena's makeup, because her full lips are stained a dark pink color and her eyes smudged with purple eye shadow. Lena has to cover her mouth with both her hands to smother a giggle at how ridiculously adorable the two look.

Lena is struck with a sudden idea, and she tiptoes back to her bedroom to locate the camera her parents bought her for her birthday. Returning to the girls' room, she carefully turns the camera on and considers the best possible angle from which to capture the shot, since she'll only get one chance. Once she approves of the position, she holds her breath as the camera flashes and waits anxiously to see if it has woken her sisters. To her relief, it has not disturbed them, and she leaves the room with what she came for. Not only did she successfully get her siblings to bed before her parents came home, but she also found the subject of her second art project for school; Cammie and Maya.

The following morning, Lena is the first in the house to wake up. She pulls her black locks into a ponytail, changes into a more suitable workout outfit, and slips her feet into her jogging sneakers. After her run, which lasts about forty-five minutes, she returns home and snags the first shower of the day. By the time she is out of the bathroom, Cody is awake and watching cartoons in the den. Since her parents arrived home so late last night, Lena decides to do her mother a favor and cook breakfast. She sets a pot of water on the stove to boil and gets to work washing half a dozen new potatoes in the sink. Once the water reaches a boil, she drops the potatoes in one at a time, adding a few pinches of salt for flavor. While the potatoes are cooking, Lena gets out the cast iron skillet to warm up some breakfast sausage, which will go along with the home fries and waffles. By the time she's ready to cook the waffles, the rest of her siblings have woken up and wandered into the kitchen to see what smells so delicious. Thankfully, waffles are the quickest to cook, and it is only after all five Fawling children are seated at the dining room table and eating that their parents join them.

"Hey," Simon greets his eldest daughter with a smile and his usual, "What's the word, Lena-bird?"

Lena smiles, rolling her eyes at her dad's predictable question. He's always called her 'Lena bird', it's his special nickname for her, and since one of his favorite oldies songs is 'Surfin' Bird' by the Trashmen, he likes to incorporate the two. "Well, everybody knows," Lena replies with a smirk, "That the bird is the word, Dad."

Simon winks as he takes his place at the head of the table, announcing, "Waffles, home fries, _and_ sausage? I must be the luckiest man in Washington."

After breakfast, Forrest and Cammie clean up the kitchen before they have to get ready for their shift at the Market. Lena returns to her room for a more casual pair of sneakers as well as her camera, and tells her parents she's walking to the pharmacy, which has a photo printer, to develop the picture of Maya and Cammie that she took last night. When she steps outside, she's pleased to feel the air has warmed at least ten degrees since her early morning run, promising a beautiful summer Sunday. She'll be able to set up her easel outside again to paint, once she returns home with her photo, and that makes her happy. Especially because Embry can't hang out with her today until after family dinner. As she hops down the front steps, she hears a door open and close to her right; it's Paul, on his way to work, most likely.

"Hey," Lena calls out to him, hoping to catch him before he leaves and possibly talk him into giving her a ride, since the pharmacy is only a block from the Market. Besides, she still has questions for him, like why he's been so moody and why he left work yesterday after only ten minutes. There's also the incident where she caught him climbing in his bedroom window, _naked, _which she'd like an explanation for. He doesn't acknowledge her greeting though, just keeps walking briskly to his truck. Lena assumes he didn't hear her, so she says his name, louder this time, "Paul," and she knows he heard her because his shoulders stiffen up and he turns his head slightly in her direction.

So...why does he ignore her? Why does he hop inside his truck, start up the engine, and take off down the street like he's fleeing a crime scene? Lena frowns in confusion, feeling cold with disappointment despite the warm air blowing against her skin. She can't remember a time Paul deliberately passed up the opportunity to tease or annoy her. She could see him turning down her request for a ride just to be a dick, but not until she'd actually asked for one. Is he mad at her? Did she do something to piss him off? She can't think of anything she'd done to make him angry with her, but for some reason she can't shake the feeling that he was hurrying off to get _away _from her, both this morning and yesterday afternoon at work. When she reaches this conclusion, she is surprised by the pain of his rejection. She stops walking, wraps her arms around herself, and stares at the sidewalk.

"Lena? You okay?" Forrest nudges his sister on the shoulder as he walks past her, Camille in tow as they're both headed to Fawling Market for their Sunday shift. He jokes, "I thought you left fifteen minutes ago? You didn't make it very far..."

"What?" Lena is startled by his arrival, not believing she actually spaced out for as long as she did, "No. I mean, yeah, I'm fine. I just...I thought I forgot something at home."

"Are you sure?" He asks, not really buying her response. She looked like she was about to cry, and that's pretty odd for Lena; he could count on one hand the times he's seen his older sister cry.

Lena nods, "Yeah." Then she realizes what she said and corrects herself, "I mean, no, I didn't leave anything. I just thought I did. And I'm fine, you little booger." She makes a face at her brother, hoping she doesn't look as strange as she feels. Yesterday, she thought she was getting sick, but the feeling passed, and now for some strange reason it has returned and she wonders if maybe she is fighting off a bug of some kind.

Cammie giggles at Lena's insult to their brother, and Forrest can't believe his ears. Lena hasn't called him 'little booger' since way before high school. He stops in his tracks and waits for her to catch up, questioning, "What was that?" He stands up straight, showing his sister he is now taller than her five-foot-five frame by at least two inches, "Little what? I'm taller than you."

"You heard me," Lena says jokingly, poking him straight in the chest, "You might be taller, but you'll always be little booger to me."

* * *

Author's Note: Well, this chapter is not quite as long as last chapter, but it is Tuesday and I promised an update, so here it is! I hope you enjoyed :)

Please review! Let me know what you thought about Paul confronting Sam, and being told to stay away from Lena. What do you think will happen next? I always appreciate hearing your comments and suggestions :)


	11. Chapter 11

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 11! I have 75 followers now for this story, and that is so exciting! Thanks for reading, you guys! :)

To those who reviewed last chapter: jace4ever, JinLing, WriteAndDream23, Guest, twilight85fan &amp; Guest - Thank you for your comments! I truly appreciate it! I know more than one of you mentioned you're not too happy about Paul keeping his distance from Lena, but I want to assure you it is not because that's what he wants. He was told by Sam to stay away, and obviously he can't disobey Sam. And as for Sam setting such a harsh punishment, it's only been a few weeks since he hurt Emily and he's really worried something like that might happen again, especially since he lost control after being a wolf for over a year. He only wants to keep Lena safe, and he thinks keeping Paul away from her will do that. We'll see how long it lasts for...

REMINDER: Rating has been changed to M, for those of you who didn't catch the warning last chapter or notice the change. I just want to make sure you are aware. Thanks :)

* * *

**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**11\. Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo**

Saturday, August 19, is Lena and Embry's highly anticipated 2-year anniversary. Lena wasn't aware of just how highly anticipated, and by whom, it was until she was woken up by her mother early in the morning and brought breakfast in bed. Winona prepared for her eldest daughter two heart-shaped pancakes, a cup of vanilla yogurt with fresh blueberries and strawberries mixed in, and a glass of orange juice, all which she delivered with a huge smile on her face. Lena sat up in bed, very confused, and thanked her mother for the surprise. It is rare that Winona does something special for Lena; in fact, they usually have a hard time getting along and most-often disagree about every little thing. Lena thinks her being with Embry is the only thing her mother actually approves of. Generally, it is Simon who Lena goes to when she needs to talk or has a request, because he listens to her and understands where she's coming from.

"Happy Anniversary Day," Winona says as she pulls open Lena's curtains to allow the sunshine to enter the room, "Two years is a long time, Lena, and I'm so proud of you."

Lena rubs the sleep out of her eyes, wondering, _She's proud of me for keeping a relationship for two years? _She isn't sure why that feels like a strange compliment to receive, but it could have something to do with the fact that she can't remember the last time her mother told her she was proud of her for anything. "Thanks," Lena mumbles, picking up the fork to take a bite of the delicious smelling pancakes.

Having a seat on the edge of her daughter's bed, Winona croons, "I bet you are so excited! I know I am, and Tiffany as well. She and I have been counting down the days for weeks. Embry is so sweet; he's planned the perfect date for you tonight, and all on his own, too. You must feel so lucky to have someone like him, honey. He loves you so much."

Surprised again by her mother's words, Lena forces down the mouthful of pancakes and replies, "I do feel lucky; I know I am." She wants to ask what Embry's planned, but she knows better. Her mom would never tell her. It has to be something good though, for both Tiffany and Winona to tell her she's in for a treat. "And I love him too."

"What are you going to wear?" Winona queries, glancing around Lena's neat room in search for an outfit, "Have you decided yet? I can help you choose, if you want." Without giving the poor girl any time to answer, she changes topics, giving her opinion of how Lena should wear her hair, and do her makeup, and suggesting that she not forget to shave her legs. "Like I said," Winona concludes, "Two years together is a long time, and you're both sixteen now, so..." Lena takes a large swig of orange juice at the exact wrong moment. "...I want you to be prepared, if it comes down to it. That's why I brought you these." She lifts the plate of pancakes to reveal three condoms, in various brands, and when Lena sees them she is so shocked that she inhales juice into her windpipe and starts to choke on it.

Lena pounds her fist against her chest as she tries to clear her throat and catch her breath. "Mom!" She croaks out, "I can't believe you're giving me _condoms. _Most parents tell their kids _not _to have sex, not give them what they need to do it." She decides this is the single-most awkward moment she and her mother have shared together in the history of _ever_ and she hopes it is nearly over.

"Well," Winona says nonchalantly, "I'm not encouraging it, Lena. I simply want you to be prepared. I was sixteen once too, and if I was having sex, then you're going to be having sex, and probably lots of it." _Oh my God, _Lena cringes, _Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse...it got worse. Ew! _"I'd much rather you be having sex safely than coming to me in a month to tell me you're pregnant. Not that Tiffany and I don't want grandchildren one day, but we'd rather you and Embry wait until you're married for that."

"Okay, Mom, _please_," Lena begs, "Enough. I appreciate the gesture, and I promise that when Embry and I are ready to...take that step, we will use protection. But this conversation is really starting to freak me out." Is this what she and Tiffany discuss when they are alone together; Lena and Embry's sex life?! Even if Lena had been planning on losing her virginity to Embry tonight, which she had considered but ultimately decided to just wait until the moment felt right, there's no way in hell she'd be able to do it now, not knowing it is exactly what both their mothers are expecting them to do. How could her mom ever think she'd want to talk to her about having sex with her boyfriend? The only way this moment could be any more mortifying would be if her father walked through the door with a banana in hand and insisted on showing her the proper way to put on a condom.

Thankfully, that doesn't happen, and Winona laughs off her daughter's embarrassment and leaves her to finish her breakfast in peace. She doesn't like to run on a full stomach, so Lena decides to take a shower and get ready for work. She hadn't picked out an outfit for tonight yet, since she'll be at work when Embry picks her up, so she really hadn't thought about it at all. She takes her time sifting through the clothes in her closet, trying to guess where Embry might be taking her or what they might be doing. It's hard to plan an outfit for an unknown destination, and she doesn't know whether to choose something pretty-casual or something more formal. She's tempted to call Sera and get her opinion, since she claims to be the most fashion forward of the group of girls, but she is never awake before 10am on weekends so it's a lost cause. Deciding to play it safe, Lena packs a bag with two outfits, one being a dark-wash pair of skinny jeans with a low-cut flowered blouse that Embry loves to see her in, and the other being a cherry red and black striped halter dress that comes down to mid-thigh, which she's never worn. She also packs the black vintage bomber jacket her cousin bought her back in June for her birthday, and a pair of black-heeled boots that will match either outfit. This way, she can talk to Embry first and choose her outfit later on. Lena knows her mother thinks she should do something extra special with her hair and makeup for today, but she styles both in the same way she usually does, because that is how she feels comfortable. Aside from that, she has to work an 8-hour shift at the Market before her date with Embry, so her hair and makeup would most likely get ruined by then anyways. She tosses her makeup bag into the small travel bag in which she packed her clothing choices for later on, and then exits her bedroom. If she has time, she'll touch-up her makeup after work, when she gets dressed.

On her way downstairs, she passes by her youngest brother, who asks, "Have you seen my cleats? I have a game in an hour, and I can't find them anywhere."

"Sorry, Code," Lena shakes her head, "I haven't seen them."

"Aw man," Cody moans as he heads to his bedroom to check the messy floor once more. "They're not gonna let me play if I don't have them."

At the bottom of the stairs, Lena glances at the pile of shoes beside the staircase, wondering if the soccer cleats might be there and Cody just hadn't noticed them. They aren't, but when she does a quick sweep of the den next, she spies the toe of a black and lime-green shoe peeking out from underneath the couch. Lena bends down to fetch it, finding the matching pair right beside, and scoops them both up. She hears Cody's feet on the stairs, and meets him at the bottom, holding out his cleats for him with a smug smile on her face.

"Found them," She boasts.

"Where were they?" Cody inquires, his honey brown eyes wide and round.

Lena shrugs, "Under the couch. That's why you should make sure you bring them to your room after practice. Or put them in the hall closet."

"Thanks Lena," Cody smiles, and then turns to yell, "Mom, I found my cleats!"

Lena rolls her eyes, not bothering to correct him that it was _she_ who found them and not he, and then returns to the den to check on her painting of Cammie and Maya, which she just finished late last night. It came out pretty darn great, especially considering that portraits are not her strong suit. She is happy she chose to push herself and paint something out of her comfort zone. Now she only has one more painting to complete before school starts, and just under two weeks to get it done. She still can't believe how quickly the summer has gone by; it feels like it was only last week she was studying with Paul for finals and anxiously awaiting to hear if he'd passed sophomore year.

Speaking of Paul, or thinking of him really, Lena frowns. He's been acting so strange lately, and recently he's been avoiding her like the plague. She is clueless as to what she could have possibly done to make him angry with her, but what other reason could he have for blatantly ignoring her? She feels like something happened while he was visiting his mother in Tacoma, but since he hasn't talked to her, it's only a guess. The reason she thinks that in the first place is because he came home in an atrocious mood, and has been on edge ever since. He's always been pretty quick to anger, but he's never been mad at her without cause. There have been plenty of times in the past where he's pestered her and she's teased him and the most he's ever done is stomp off in a huff or tell her she's a bitch. But the difference between then and now is that he's never held a grudge before, he always let it go once his anger passed, and this time he hasn't. Unless he's still angry. _But what did I do? _Lena sighs in frustration just thinking about it.

"What's the matter?" Forrest asks, having just entered the room and took notice of the irritation on his sister's face.

"Nothing," Lena denies with a shake of her head, "Just...work, you know."

Forrest hurls himself on the couch, reaching for the remote. He smirks and teases playfully, "Aw, yeah. Sucks to be you."

Lena flicks him on the head as she walks out of the room, "Shut up." She picks up her travel bag at the bottom of the stairs, where she left it when she went in search of Cody's shoes, and then heads to the front door. She calls over her shoulder, "I'm leaving for work now. Bye!"

"Bye Lena," Cody shouts from upstairs, where he's putting his soccer uniform on.

"Bye!" Forrest calls lazily from the couch in the den.

"Bye sweetie," Winona says as she comes out of her bedroom, excitement written all over her face, "Have a great time later!"

**.**

At 2:30, Lena looks up from her cash register and glances around the store, wondering out loud, "Where's Paul? He's even later than usual today."

Much to her surprise, Leah informs her, "Paul's not working on Saturdays anymore."

That's news to Lena. "Since when?" She asks doubtfully, "Did he tell you that?" Why does Leah know before Lena when it's her parents who own the damn grocery store?

"Since today, I guess," Leah responds, trying to keep her face neutral as she speaks, "He told your dad last Sunday he couldn't work Saturdays for a while."

"Why?" Lena asks quickly, searching Leah's face for answers. She doesn't know why, but she feels like the older girl is hiding something from her. Maybe she's just being silly.

Leah shrugs, getting defensive, "I don't know why. I'm not Paul's keeper. What do I care?"

Lena holds up her hands in mock-surrender, commenting, "Jeez. Someone is in a mood today. I was just curious." Honestly, she's a bit disappointed by the news. Now it seems even more likely that Paul has been avoiding her, especially considering he changed his work schedule around on the one day a week they share a shift together. How is she supposed to get through her longest shift of the week without Paul and Leah to entertain her with their mood swings? Not to mention, Saturday is the Market's busiest day and they are now short an employee.

"Sorry," Leah replies, making a face like she's disgusted with something, "I made a _colossal _mistake last weekend and I still feel sick about it. I'm glad he's not here to make it any worse."

"Wait, what?" Lena can't believe her ears, and she turns to Leah in surprise, sure the other girl isn't hinting at what she thinks she is. "What kind of a mistake are we talking about here?"

"Ugh, nothing!" Leah waves her hands around and closes her eyes, making gagging noises with her mouth, "I don't even want to talk about it. I don't know why I said anything at all. Just forget I said that."

Lena's eyes widen in complete shock and disbelief. "Shut your mouth," She tells Leah, "No way." From her reaction, she can only guess her previous thoughts were correct, and it's such a surprise she almost can't believe it. Of course, she knows Leah is gorgeous, what with her long, toned legs and silky straight ebony hair that flows down past her full breasts, not to mention her flawless skin and statuesque facial features, and obviously Lena also knows that Paul is cool and confident and has quite a way with the ladies. But...Leah and Paul together? Never in a million years!

Leah sends the younger brunette a warning glance, cautioning her, "I swear to you, Lena, if you say anything to anyone I will _kill _you."

Lena's mouth drops open and she can't help but blurt out, "Shut the fuck up! You? And Paul? You-"

Leah steps forward and clamps her hand over the other girl's mouth, reminding her, "What did I just say?!" She drops her hand when Lena shrugs disarmingly.

"You said don't tell anyone," Lena points out, "And I wasn't. There's literally no one else around."

"I know," Leah groans dramatically, "But I don't want to talk about it out loud. I can't. That means it's real and it really happened and I - UGH - I am so mad at myself for letting it happen. Gross. Just, kill me, Lena, please." She takes hold of Lena's shoulders and lightly shakes her as she wishes for a rock to appear so she could crawl under it and hide from her reality.

"So wait," Lena lowers her voice, needing to be sure, "You really slept with _Paul?_" Leah nods, now hiding her face behind her hands in shame. "How? Why?" Lena can't comprehend this crazy news without more information. "I mean, how did this happen without one of you killing the other? Wait a minute, when did this happen? Is Paul dead? Oh my God, you killed him; that's why he's not here. Leah Clearwater, tell me everything!" She isn't usually so nosy or pushy, but for some reason she is dying to know every detail. Her eyes dart around to ensure there are still no customers within earshot. She then nods to Leah encouragingly.

"Of course I didn't kill him, you moron," Leah smacks Lena on the arm for even suggesting something so stupid, "I'm gonna kill you, though." She's in a rather murderous mood this afternoon, isn't she?

"Come on, Leah," A pout forms on Lena's lips and she bats her eyelashes, pleading with the older teen, "Tell me. Please?"

"Fine," Leah sighs, "But I meant what I said. You tell _no one _about this. I haven't told anyone but you, so if you tell someone, I will know, and I will -"

"I know, I know," Lena interrupts, "You'll kill me." She doesn't bother to suggest that the news could be spread by Paul telling one of his buddies, and them surely passing the news along to even more buddies. It wouldn't surprise her, considering the company Paul keeps. Leah would probably just decide to keep all the deets to herself if she mentioned that, though, so she bites her tongue.

"It happened last Saturday," Leah spills, still unsure if it's a good idea or if she'll regret speaking about it, "After you went home, Paul came back and worked the rest of his shift. Shayna chewed him out pretty good for leaving in the first place, and for a second it looked like he was going to flip out on her, but he didn't. After we closed, he offered me a ride home." She pauses, noting, "I should have said no. That was my mistake. Well, my first mistake. My second mistake was mentioning Sam." She closes her eyes and shakes her head, feeling the familiar taste of bitterness on her tongue any time she thinks of him lately. It still hurts to think he left her for her cousin, and Emily had the gall to accept his advances instead of telling him to fuck off like a good friend and family-member would do. At this point, she wouldn't care if she didn't have to see either of them again in her whole life. If she could only save up enough money to get herself out of this place, she'd be rid of them for good. "I guess Sam did something to piss Paul off, I don't really know. He ended up driving to the beach instead of my house, and then the next thing I know he's kissing me, and I'm _letting him_, and - I-I can't, I can't. I refuse to talk about it. It happened. It's over. It was a big mistake, we both agreed on that immediately after. And it will never, ever, _ever_ happen again. Ever." She takes a deep breath and adds once more, for finality, "Never again."

"Wow." Lena is sort of glad Leah didn't end up giving her all the nitty, gritty details about her hook-up with Paul. She thought she wanted to know, but the more she heard, the more she began to feel uncomfortable with the whole idea of Leah and Paul together, not that it should be any of her business. She just pictured it in her mind and it...made her feel kind of sick to her stomach. She is relieved when Leah states profusely that she doesn't plan on doing the dirty deed with Paul again. The queasy feeling doesn't leave her belly though, not for the rest of her shift.

**.**

Lena's anniversary date with Embry was fun, romantic, and something special she'll remember forever. He arrived at Fawling Market right at 7 o'clock, and waited patiently in the car while she changed out of her work clothes and fixed up her hair and makeup. She looked stunningly beautiful, at least to Embry, and he made sure to tell her a few times throughout the night. Lena was completely surprised when he took her to Port Angeles for a picnic dinner in the park, where they showed her all-time favorite childhood movie, Beauty and the Beast, on a giant projector screen. Lena never could have guessed that Embry would plan something so thoughtful and sweet just for her. They exchanged their gifts right before the movie started; Lena giving Embry the scrapbook she made him of their 2-year relationship and their friendship all the years before that, and Embry giving Lena the bracelet he handmade her, with the wood-carved owl at the center that he also made. Lena loves owls so she absolutely loved the gift. She tried the stay awake the whole ride home, but it was late and she'd been woken up early, so she ended up falling asleep. When Embry woke her up, they were at his house, and he told her his mom had said she could sleep over if she wanted. She was too tired to disagree, but when they got inside and snuggled up in his bed, she fell asleep right on Embry's chest, so if he'd been hoping for anything more to happen he may have been a little disappointed.

The next morning, when Lena and Embry woke up, Tiffany had already left for work, so they spent some time kissing and touching and rubbing on one another, to the point where Lena was almost sure she was ready...but then she remembered the talk she had with her mother the previous morning and the condoms she gave her, and she was immediately turned off. Tiffany has never allowed her to sleep over before, but the night of her and Embry's 2-year anniversary, when her own mother just so happened to give her the okay to practice safe sex with Embry, she decided it was all right? It was like the mothers decided Embry and Lena could have sex, but on their terms, and it was making everything weird. Lena told Embry it didn't feel right, and he said he understood, but she gave him a hand job just to make sure he wasn't totally unsatisfied. Why should he be deprived just because their moms ruined sex for her? She'll eventually get over it, but for now they'll have to stick to third base instead of making a home run; they've been fine there for a while and there's no reason that has to change just because they've been together for two whole years.

After spending most of the day with Embry at the beach, the two walk down to the souvenir shop where Tiffany Call works and borrow her car so that Embry can give Lena a ride home.

"I had a really great time today," Lena tells her guy as soon as her house is in sight, "And last night was perfect, Em, really. You make me so happy. I can't believe you brought me to see Beauty and the Beast in the park. That was so cool. I think you just might win the Best Boyfriend of the Year Award." She grins and sends him a wink when he looks her way.

"I'm glad you liked it," Embry replies, "I was worried you'd think it was cheesy or something, but I'm glad you had fun. Thanks for staying over. I wish we could do it all the time." He slows the car down as he approaches Lena's familiar pale-yellow home with navy blue window shutters, eventually coming to a stop next to the curb right in front of the house.

"Me too," Lena agrees as she un-clicks her seat belt, "You make a comfy pillow." She laughs as she leans in for a kiss.

"You look sexy in my bed," Embry jokes, pulling her in for another kiss. He says reluctantly, "I have to get back to pick up my mom."

"I know," Lena slides across the seat and opens the passenger side door, "Love you." She waits until he says it back before hopping out of the car and closing the door behind her.

Lena starts to walk towards her front door and sees Paul's truck out of the corner of her eye, just turning into his driveway. She quickly turns her head so he won't catch her looking and tries to hurry down the walkway to the house. If he doesn't want to talk to her then she is going to ignore him too and see how he likes it. Paul cuts the engine and tries not to look in Lena's direction as he pockets his keys and slowly gets out of the truck, trying to avoid the awkward moment where he has to pretend he doesn't even notice her. It kills him every time, like physically hurts to walk away from her and ignore her words, another great side-effect of the whole 'imprinting' thing, but Sam forbade him to get anywhere near Lena until he can control himself. He doesn't even know how long that's going to take, but by that point he's sure Lena is going to hate him. He hasn't even closed the door when he hears Embry call out behind him, "Hey Paul."

He turns to see the kid waving as he passes by Paul's house in his mom's green Subaru. Without really thinking about it, Paul waves back and returns, "Hey." He is just glad Embry wasn't stopping to talk, because he worked an 8-hour shift and he's starving.

Lena had just reached the handle on her front door and was about to turn the knob to enter the house when she hears Paul reply to Embry. She halts in her tracks, her head turning in surprise and an annoyed frown quickly forming on her face. "Are you serious?" She accuses, feeling her blood boil in anger, "You can say 'hey' to Embry, but you couldn't hear me when I said 'hey' three times in the past week? What is your deal?" She finds herself back-tracking down the front stairs of her porch, and starting across her lawn towards Paul's to confront him. She was going to ignore him, but she's more mature than that. He's the one avoiding her and not even willing to tell her why. "Hello? I'm talking to you. I know you can hear me. Please enlighten me as to what I possibly could have done to deserve the silent treatment from _you._"

Paul winces, hearing the hurt in Lena's voice despite her attempt to sound sarcastic and angry. How can he pretend he didn't hear that? He can't; it's impossible. He thinks back to what Sam said when he used his stupid Alpha command to keep Paul away from Lena, and technically he only forbade him to approach Lena or initiate a conversation, but he never out-right said he had to ignore her. And right now, he'd rather Sam be annoyed with him than Lena think he's angry with her when he isn't. Besides, how much angrier can Sam get, really? He's already furious with Paul for screwing his ex-girlfriend, whom he apparently still has strong feelings for, and he's not likely to get over that very soon. Paul turns around just as Lena reaches the half-way point between his house and hers, and she freezes, seeming surprised he actually listened.

She crosses her arms and purses her lips together as she waits for a response. Paul first observes that she looks adorable when she makes that face, and then that she looks even prettier today than she did last Saturday when he imprinted on her, which he didn't think was possible. Maybe it's another side-effect? She looks like the most gorgeous girl in the world because she was made for him? He wonders what she thinks of him, if it's any different for her now than before. "Well?" Lena prompts impatiently, "Are you going to say something or just stand there staring? God, you've been so weird lately."

_I guess that's what she thinks, _Paul concludes to himself. Then he admits, "I really don't know what I should say."

The first words he says to her in just over a week...and they are literally useless. "Great answer," Lena comments sarcastically.

"I'm sorry," Paul tries again, hoping she'll accept this answer better, "I've been...dealing with some shit lately...and it's made me act like a real asshole."

Lena relaxes her stance a bit, sensing that he's telling the truth and he has been going through something. "At least you can admit you're an asshole," She says.

"That's not exactly what I said," Paul shrugs awkwardly, "But I guess I deserve that. I didn't want to take my anger out on you, so I -"

"News flash, Paul," Lena cuts in, "You're always angry about something, so that's a pretty lame excuse. Is that why you switched your schedule so you wouldn't have to work on Saturdays anymore?"

Paul struggles with an answer, finally settling on, "It's complicated."

"I'll take that as a 'yes'. If you don't want to talk to me about it, that's fine," Lena tells him, not really meaning it because she wants to demand answers instead of let him off the hook so easily, "But I guess I don't understand why you'd go through all the trouble just to avoid me. It's not like I've never seen you angry before. I mean, what's the worst that could happen? Are you going to turn into a giant green man and start smashing everything in sight?"

Paul wants to laugh and tell her of course that's not going to happen, but he realizes the truth is that she's not too far off. He might not transform into the Hulk, but a giant grey wolf isn't much better. And the worst thing that could happen would be for him to lose control and hurt her, the way Sam did Emily, and he doesn't want Lena to get hurt. He can't tell her any of this though, because Sam forbade it. Lena's not ready to learn the truth yet; it's meant to be kept a secret, and Sam doesn't know if she'll be able to keep their secret from Embry or her family. The Fawlings have never been to a story-telling, so Lena may not even be familiar with the legends of their people, and that makes all of this so much harder. Paul says regretfully, "I...can't say."

"Of course you can't," Lena replies bitterly. She is confused by the whirlwind of emotions swirling around inside her right now; anger, hurt, jealousy, betrayal, guilt...desire? She shakes her head, wishing there were an easier way to clear her mind of these mixed up feelings. She shouldn't be so affected by Paul and what's going on in his life, but for some reason she is, and it makes her want to punch him in the face. Although, she's not sure what that would solve. Before she even knows what she's saying, she's already spat out, "Betcha you told Leah though." She watches Paul's brown eyes widen in surprise as she backs away from him, and then turns on her heel and retreats towards her house, wanting nothing more than to take back those words. She never meant for Paul to know that Leah told her about their tryst. Now she feels sick to her stomach again.

"Wait," Paul calls after her, once he's gotten over the initial shock that his imprint knows he slept with another girl, "Lena, please. I want to explain to you."

"Save it!" Lena suggests stubbornly, "I don't even want to know. Just go back to pretending I don't exist." She runs up the front steps and pulls open the door, stepping inside quickly and slamming it shut behind her. She stomps up the stairs to her bedroom, taking deep breaths and wondering why her heart is pounding so hard and why there are tears pricking her eyelids.

* * *

Author's Note: There you have it! Longest chapter yet. Sorry it is coming to you on Friday and not Tuesday, like I originally planned. But I hope you guys are happy to see some Paul/Lena interactions in this chapter, as brief as it was. I promise there will be more next chapter :)

Please Review! A lot happened this chapter, and I'd love to hear what you thought. What did you think of Lena &amp; Embry's anniversary? What about Lena confronting Paul at the end? I hope nobody hates me for the Paul/Leah hook-up, but in case you do I can guarantee that won't be happening again LOL! Next chapter will hopefully be up by Tuesday, I've already started it :)


	12. Chapter 12

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 12! Welcome to those of you just starting to follow along, and thanks for checking out my story! Also, Happy Mother's Day to any moms who may be reading, I hope you enjoyed your day Sunday :) I am expecting my 2nd baby this July - a boy; my daughter is going to be 6 in August, so I guess I can't call her a baby anymore, but she'll always _my _baby lol ;)

To my Reviewers: twilight85fan, TheRealPrincessTigerLily, Laura, jace4ever, Guest, WriteAndDream23, &amp; Guest - Thanks so much for reviewing! I appreciate your feedback! I know the whole Paul/Leah hook-up came as a huge surprise, but it was Paul's stupid way of defying Sam and he wasn't really thinking clearly as he was just told his supposed soul-mate is his neighbor who is in love with somebody else. So, while it was a dumb thing to do, this is Paul we're talking about here, and he can't be expected to use his big brain all the time ;) Hopefully all of you, and Lena, can forgive him for making such a huge mistake. Only time will tell, I suppose...

Oh, and guess what? This chapter is even longer than last chapter, so I hope you guys enjoy! :)

* * *

**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**12\. You and Me Run the Same Course**

Lena has just walked through the threshold of her bedroom and is about to slam the door shut when she hears her father's voice behind her, calling up from the bottom of the stairs, "Hey!" She stops and swivels on her feet, blinking extra fast to get rid of the moisture in her eyes. When Simon sees his daughter's face, he frowns, asking suspiciously, "What's the word, Lena-bird?"

Not in the mood to play along, Lena shakes her head and shrugs, "I don't know, Dad."

Simon starts up the stairs, commenting slowly, "I was under the impression that, by now, everybody had heard..." Lena raises her eyebrows, knowing too well what he's about to say next, "...that the bird is the word." He says it so matter-of-factly, so straight-faced, that Lena can't help but laugh for a moment, but then she catches herself and clamps her mouth shut while she frowns at her father. She doesn't want to laugh at his jokes right now. At the top of the staircase, Simon asks seriously, "What's the matter, bird?"

"Nothing," Lena denies, wondering how she could even explain what she's upset about had she wanted to talk about it in the first place. 'Oh, I'm just weirdly upset because the stupid boy next door is being super douchey lately, and even though it shouldn't matter to me I'm taking it personally. And, let's not forget, I'm also feeling barfy since I can't stop thinking about Paul fucking Leah, and that's ridiculous because it's none of my business! And I don't care anyways, not really. I just thought we were better friends than they are and he won't even talk to me but he's sleeping with Leah, who I thought he hated...' Lena shakes her head, glad she didn't say any of that out loud.

"Did something happen," Simon questions cautiously, not sure he wants to venture into this territory, since boys are more Winona's area of expertise, "between you and Embry?"

"No, nothing happened," Lena insists, "I had a great time with Embry. It wasn't him."

"What was it then?" Simon notes, "It's not often that I see you upset, and since it happens so rarely it's easy to tell when you _are. _Spill the beans, kid."

"I'm not upset," Lena says unconvincingly, "I'm just tired. I want to take a shower and then have a nap before dinner. Okay?" Simon raises a single eyebrow, not buying this excuse one bit. "Dad," Lena groans, "It's nothing. It's stupid. I don't want to talk about it. Can I _please_ go take a shower?"

"All right," Simon relents with a sigh, "Go on. But Lena, if you need to talk, you know you can always come to your old man."

"I know Dad," Lena says as she waits for him to leave her bedroom doorway so she can close the door and fall face-first onto her mattress. She lays like this for a moment, attempting to regain her composure. She can't stop replaying the unexpected encounter with Paul just now, and each time that she recalls her words and behavior she feels more and more embarrassed. What was she thinking? Paul must think she's got some sort of creepy obsession with him now, accusing him of switching around his work schedule just to avoid her, and calling him out for sleeping with Leah like she did. Why did she say that? It's not like it's a shocker to anyone that Paul bagged some ass, but it is mind-boggling that said ass happens to belong to Leah Clearwater. Still, it's not Lena's business, and now she knows Paul isn't going to talk to her, because why would he want to after witnessing her freak out over something that has absolutely nothing to do with her? She's not Sera; she's not ga-ga for Paul, so why did she overreact so badly?

Eventually, Lena sits up with an elongated sigh and chooses a comfortable outfit to put on after her shower. She cracks open her door, hoping her family is otherwise occupied and won't bother her for a while, and makes a dash for the bathroom. After grabbing a fresh towel from the linen closet, she closes the bathroom door, clicking the lock into place and immediately twisting the knob on the faucet to hot as she starts up the shower. She sheds her clothes slowly, taking the time to fold them up neat before she steps into the shower's spray. Lena takes her time, enjoying the feel of the hot water on her skin since she usually rushes through her showers in the morning to avoid conflict between her siblings. When she finally emerges from the steamy bathroom, retreating to her bedroom to get dressed, she observes the time is half-past three, and she settles into her bed for a nap before she's expected downstairs for family dinner.

Lena is surprised when Maya wakes her up a few hours later to tell her that it's 6 o'clock and everyone is waiting for her so they can eat dinner. She wasn't expecting to sleep for so long. When she sits down at the table with her family and sees the salad, garlic bread, and lasagna her mother must have spent all afternoon cooking, she feels sort of bad because she has no appetite whatsoever. She nibbles on a piece of garlic bread, picks at her salad, and pushes around the lasagna on her plate while Winona interrogates her about her date last night with Embry. Lena answers all of her questions to the best of her ability, but she can't help feeling like her mom is pressing her for details on what happened _after_ she and Embry returned from Port Angeles. She very nearly shouts across the table, 'We didn't have sex, all right?! Leave me alone!' but she refrains herself. Thankfully, her mother doesn't seem to notice her lack of appetite, and after helping to clear the table and load the dishwasher, she is free to do as she pleases.

Lena is examining her art supplies in the den when she hears Forrest ask their father, "Can I get a ride to Seth's? He said I could stay over tonight, and then we're going to go fishing tomorrow morning with Harry and Billy Black."

"I suppose I can do that," Simon agrees, after looking to his wife and getting her nod of approval. To Winona, he queries, "Anything I get for you while I'm out, my dear?"

Winona, whose stomach hasn't been feeling right the past few weeks, requests, "Maybe you could stop by the Market and bring home some ginger ale? Or maybe ginger tea?" She has a hunch she's entering the early stages of menopause, what with the queasy belly, extra fatigue, trouble sleeping, and occasional hot flash, but she's not ready to admit that out loud just yet. After all, she's not even forty for another year and a half, so she isn't ready to admit she's getting older.

Simon rises from his chair at the dining room table, where he and Winona were having a cup of coffee while they discuss next weekend's plans of back-to-school shopping for the kids, and places a kiss on his wife's forehead. "Sure thing," He replies. "Are you ready to go now, son?"

"Yup."

Lena waits until her dad and Forrest enter the hallway to voice her question, "Can I come too? I mean, not to the Clearwaters', but would you drop me off at First Beach on your way? I want to get some painting done tonight." When she and Embry had been there earlier, Lena wished she'd had her paints and a canvas because the waves crashing against the cliffs in the distance were calling to her to capture them on paper. She's sure the scene will be even more magnificent with a sunset in the background.

"Are you sure you have time?" Simon points out, "It's almost seven; it will be getting dark soon."

"Sunset is at 8:16 tonight," Lena tells him, "I already checked. So if we leave right now, I'll have about an hour and a half to paint before it gets too dark." She smiles hopefully, already having gathered her easel, paints, and a blank canvas.

"All right, Lena-bird," Simon says, happy to see his eldest daughter in a better mood than she was earlier this afternoon, "We better get going then. Will you need a ride home?"

"No," Lena shakes her head, "I can walk." It's difficult with an easel and a drying painting, but it's not impossible; she's done it before. "Or maybe I'll call Embry and see if he can get me."

**.**

After Lena tells him to pretend she doesn't exist and disappears inside her house, Paul is left standing in his driveway wondering what the hell just happened. First off, he wasn't anticipating Lena's anger towards him, especially since she's usually very laid-back. He honestly didn't think she'd notice his absence from her life this past week, and he's starting to believe Sam's warning that the imprint is two-sided and will affect Lena too. What other explanation is there for her to be so upset with him over switching his work schedule around a bit? He thought he'd been avoiding her smoothly; he was apparently wrong about that. Secondly, he really, really was not prepared for Lena to find out about his hasty hook-up with Leah. He was already feeling guilty about it, which is annoying since he's almost positive Lena and Embry have sex, so why does he have to feel guilty for doing the exact same thing? He imprinted on a girl with a boyfriend and now he has to remain celibate until she realizes her feelings for him? That seems highly unfair to Paul. Besides, what is Leah telling people about it for when they both agreed it was a huge mistake? He thought for sure he didn't have anything to worry about there, because Leah wouldn't want anyone to find out she slept with him, of all people. He should have known better. Lena is like the one girl Leah actually talks to somewhat civilly, and if she were going to tell anyone about what they'd done, he should have known it'd be Lena.

He's feeling pretty stupid when he finally moves his feet and goes inside to find something to eat. He might have unfinished business with the girl-next-door, but a shape-shifter still has to eat. It's too bad when he attempts to make a sandwich he discovers the lunch meat has gone bad and they're all out of mayo. To top it all off, when he checks the jar in which he and his dad keep money for groceries, he finds only a single penny. What the fuck good is one penny? Paul slams the lid on the jar and feels his body start to shake and shudder with rage. He can't count on his dad for anything. Paul succumbs to the inevitable and sheds his clothes on his way out the back door, allowing the wolf to take over once he's safely in the cover of the woods.

One of the cooler aspects of the mind link between pack-members is the ability to sense when a fellow wolf is nearby. On the same note, the mind link can be rather annoying when there's something he wishes to keep to himself, like last week when he stupidly slept with Leah, because it's practically impossible to keep something secret when his mind is connected to his pack brothers and they both found out right away. Immediately after phasing, Paul knows he's not alone in wolf-form. Jared is also trotting through the woods somewhere. He knows it's Jared and not Sam because the presence of Sam, being the alpha of the pack, is stronger than Jared's.

_Where's Sam? _Paul sends his question to Jared, hoping the other teen will have an answer for him since he really needs to talk to Sam.

_With Emily, _Jared supplies an answer pretty quick, _He's showing her his dad's old place, down by Second Beach._

_What's he doing over there? _Paul wonders as he heads in that direction, recalling how Sam's dad walked out on him and his mom when he was pretty young. He knew Sam's mom moved them out of that house, to avoid the painful memories, but he wasn't aware the property still belonged to Sam's family.

_I guess he's thinking of moving in there, _Jared replies, _w__ith Emily._

_Are you serious? _Paul almost can't believe his ears, _So he practically rips the girl's face off two weeks ago and now they're moving in together? Right, of course they are, because Sam's a fuckin' hypocrite. I haven't even done anything to Lena and I'm not allowed to go near her, but he can see Emily whenever he wants after trying to kill her._

_That's not what happened, and you know it, _Jared reminds Paul, _Things haven't been easy for Sam. Don't make it worse._

_Me? What about him? _Paul scoffs, _Just wait until you imprint, Jared. See how much you like it if Sam tries to keep you away from her._

_He won't, _Jared seems pretty smug, _I know how to control myself._

Paul growls, _Fuck you._

A few minutes later, Paul has caught the scent of Sam and his imprint, and he follows his nose through the woods until he comes across a brown, two-story cabin which is a bit run-down, but still in livable condition. It has a large, covered porch and massive floor-to-ceiling windows that give a great view of the surrounding woods and Second Beach, which is literally in the backyard. Paul can see why Sam would want to make a home here with Emily. He just can't believe they're taking things so quickly. Another side-effect of the imprint? Or is it because Emily lives an hour away with the Makah tribe and Sam wants her closer to him?

Almost like he can sense Paul's presence nearby, Sam steps outside a moment later and scans the backyard with his black all-knowing eyes. Paul steps out of the shadows and Sam crosses his arms over his chest once he sees him and frowns deeply. "What do you want, Paul?" He asks lowly. He's clearly still mad about the whole Leah thing. Paul was hoping he'd be over it by now, especially since they've fought in both forms more than once the past week about it. A good fight always cools Paul off. What's it going to take for Sam to get over this? Paul is sure he wouldn't be as mad if their roles were reversed. It's not like he fucked Emily or something.

To his lack of response, Sam further observes, "I see you still haven't taken my advice about tying a pair of pants around your ankle before you turn. It might sound stupid, but I think it's a little less stupid than showing up naked everywhere you go."

Paul rolls his eyes. Why else does Sam think he hasn't phased back already? He really wouldn't care if Sam saw him naked, but he's pretty sure Sam wouldn't like it if Emily did.

Sighing, Sam stomps over to his car and pulls a pair of cutoff jeans from his backseat. He has made a habit of keeping an extra pair of pants in the car, just in case something unexpected happens. "Here," He states as he tosses the pants in the grey wolf's direction, "You can borrow these. But I want them back, so don't destroy them. And make it quick...Emily and I are busy."

Paul picks up the pants with his teeth and carries them into the woods, where he phases and quickly pulls them on. When he returns, Sam is waiting for him at the bottom of the porch stairs, while he can see Emily looking out of the window inside what he can only guess is the kitchen. Her face is still pretty messed up from the accident, and it's going to take a while before it heals up completely. Paul knows from Sam that she's self-conscious of the scars, but she still sends Paul a smile and a wave, which he returns. She's tougher than she looks, that much is clear from what she's gone through with Sam and the fact that she's stuck around, but she's also a sweetheart.

"Well?" Sam prompts, "What is it?"

Paul approaches the older male slowly, demanding in what he hopes isn't a confrontational tone, "I want you to lift your dumb alpha ban on Lena."

Sam raises an eyebrow, replying coolly, "I don't think so."

"Come on, Sam," Paul argues, "It's been over a week. I've been trying to avoid her, but I told you it wouldn't be easy. She lives next door, it's not like I can move just to keep us from crossing paths. She's starting to get pissed off. Today she accused me of switching my schedule around to avoid her. She knows something's going on, and she's mad I won't give her any answers. How much longer do you think I can keep this up?"

"As long as it takes," Sam shrugs.

"Sam," Emily chides sternly from the open doorway of the cabin, "Please tell me you did _not _use your Alpha command to keep Paul from his imprint!"

Sam's eyes widen and he turns towards Emily slowly, "I...Emily, I had to."

"Oh, really?" Emily places her hands on her hips, reminding him, "How well did it work out for us when we tried to avoid each other? Hmm?" When Sam opens his mouth but no words come out, Emily comments, "That's right, it didn't." Her face softens as she steps closer to the man she loves, and she reaches out with one hand and softly strokes his cheek, gently advising, "Don't punish Paul for something he hasn't done yet. Give him a chance. From what you told me, he's already going to have a hard enough time as it is. Don't make things harder than they need to be."

"But what if...?" Sam trails off, not needing to voice his concern, because she already knows what his fear is.

"He won't hurt her," Emily says surely, turning her almond eyes to the younger Quileute, "Will you, Paul?"

Paul shakes his head quickly, "No. Of course not." He's shocked Emily is sticking up for him when she barely knows him, but he sure is grateful.

Inwardly, Sam groans, because he knows he can't refuse Emily. He wanted to keep Paul from Lena for a while longer, but maybe part of it is for selfish reasons. Maybe he just wants to punish the young wolf for playing with a toy that used to be his, and he knows this isn't fair. If he's going to be the alpha of the pack, which he is because there's no one else to fill the role, then he has to be a fair one. The imprint works both ways, and if Lena is suffering because of his command to keep Paul away from her, then he can't keep them apart any longer. "All right," Sam acquiesces, "Fine. Paul, you don't have to stay away from Lena anymore, but I still want you to be careful. And you can't tell her about shape-shifting or about the imprint. Not yet, anyways. Not until she's ready. Billy wants her to come to a bonfire, so she can hear the stories, he thinks it would help to put the idea in her head, so she's not to surprised when she finds out the truth. Until then, keep your mouth shut about it. Understand?"

"Yeah, sure," Paul nods, "Whatever you say. She's going to ask questions, though. What am I supposed to tell her since I can't tell her the truth?"

Sam advises rather lamely, "You're going to have to figure that out on your own."

"Gee, thanks," Paul states sarcastically, "Let me guess, it's up to me to figure out a way to get Lena to go to a bonfire too, isn't it?"

Sam cocks his head to the left as if considering this, and then shrugs, "You guessed right. Good luck, buddy. Now are we finished here? I was in the middle of giving Emily a tour of the house."

"Yeah, yeah. I'll go." Paul starts to back away, smiling to the girl standing behind his alpha, "Thanks Emily."

**.**

Later in the evening, after Paul returns home from the Market for the second time today, carrying along two bags of groceries which he paid for with his own money, he cooks himself half a dozen hot dogs and sits down on the couch in front of the TV to eat. He's still hungry after eating the hot dogs, but he needs the food he bought to last so he doesn't make anything else. Instead, he ponders over what exactly he's going to say to Lena when he sees her, and how he's going to get her to talk to him in the first place. He considers walking over, knocking on the door, and simply asking her to talk, but then he shoots down that idea. Lena probably won't be the one to answer the door, and if it's either of her parents, they are going to be suspicious as to why he wants to speak to their daughter. Mrs. Fawling much more so than Mr. Fawling, because she's not Paul's number one fan. In fact, he's pretty positive Mrs. Fawling dislikes him very much, not that he knows why; must be his shining reputation. Paul gets to his feet and starts pacing the floor as he thinks, but he's drawing a blank. He's never really had to _pursue _a girl before, they've always come to him pretty easily, but this is not the case with Lena. He's going to have to actually try with her, and that's a scary thought.

Paul is deep in thought when he hears the door to his neighbors' home open and close, but as soon as he hears Lena's voice, he is at the window in his kitchen, peering outside from behind the curtain. "Would you hurry up?" Lena is saying to Forrest, "I want to get to the beach before I lose all the light."

"I forgot my toothbrush," Forrest replies as he runs back to the house, "I'll be right back!"

Lena sighs, looking to her father, who simply smiles and shakes his head as he climbs into the drivers' seat of his silver Honda Accord. Lena opens the back door and sticks her easel, canvas and art supply bags on the seat, and then walks around to the other side of the car to climb into the back seat since she plans to get dropped off first. By the time she is settled in her seat, Forrest is back, and he jogs to the car and hops in the front seat beside his dad, announcing, "Ready."

Paul watches the car back out of the driveway and take off down the road before he allows the curtain to drop back in place, and then he glances at the clock on the wall. 6:43. What is Lena going to paint at the beach so late for? Is her father going with her? Is she meeting Embry there? Paul knows the kid lives only a couple streets away from First Beach, but Lena was just with him last night and practically all day today, so why does she need to see him again so soon? He doesn't realize at first that the bitter taste in his mouth and the burning sensation in his stomach is jealousy, since it's not an emotion he's used to feeling. Paul Lahote does not get jealous, especially not over a girl liking a scrawny wimp like Embry Call. _Stupid imprinting side-effects, _Paul thinks to himself, taking a deep breath in hopes of calming down before he gets angry and the wolf takes over again. _Why did this have to happen to me?_

By the time Paul has managed to regain control, which he thinks Sam would be pretty proud of, he hears his dad's crappy Ford truck pulling into the driveway. Paul inwardly groans, not wishing to see his dad right now because he's still annoyed with him for spending their grocery money on booze. He doesn't have to ask to know that's where the money went, because when money disappears in this house, empty bottles reappear in their place. It's too bad his dad can't find another way to cope with his miserable self. Maybe he should do what Paul does and get laid when he's angry, but instead he drowns his sorrows in alcohol. Paul shakes his head, turning on the spot and searching for the keys to his truck. He finds them on the coffee table, next to his empty plate, where he left them, and quickly scoops them up. As his dad walks in the front door, Paul is stepping into his sneakers to go out.

"Paul," Eli Lahote greets his son, attempting to hide his brown-bagged purchase from the liquor store behind his back as he steps inside the house, "You headin' out?"

"Yep," Paul replies, brushing past him as he walks outside. He rolls his eyes at his dad's predictability. Does he really think Paul doesn't see the bag, or know what's inside? Still, he does the responsible thing and lets him know, "I'll be back later."

"All right," Eli says agreeably. Before closing the door behind himself, he asks, "Did you lose your shirt?"

Paul looks down, only just realizing he never put a shirt on when he got home. He shrugs, not feeling uncomfortable due to his higher body temperature, and tells his dad, "Nope. I'm good." He doesn't feel like backtracking into the house for a shirt that he doesn't really need, and he knows the more time he spends with his dad the more likely it is he'll wind up on four furry legs with a tail. He hops down the stairs two at a time and gets behind the wheel of his truck. He doesn't know where he's going to go, just that it needs to be away from _here._

Unsurprisingly, Paul heads in the direction of First Beach, knowing Lena is there. Maybe she'll be alone and he'll have a chance to talk to her. For once, it seems luck is on his side. When he parks his truck, he notes the rest of the parking lot is deserted, and the only person left on the beach is standing behind her easel, furiously painting the sunset on the canvas before her. Paul observes her from a distance for a while, not wanting to disturb her while she works since he snuck up on Lena once before when she was painting, and she screamed and streaked a line of black paint across the paper, ruining what she'd spent so much time on. That was the most angry he's ever seen Lena, except perhaps for today. He's not sure how long he's watching her for before he starts to walk over, but it's long enough for the sun to dip even lower in the sky, nearly disappearing behind the ocean far off in the distance. Lena is losing the light, and pretty quickly, too. As Paul gets closer, he realizes she's not only painting the sunset over the ocean, but the jagged cliffs that tourists are so drawn to, and the ones that he, Sam and Jared are supposed to go cliff-diving from pretty soon. Jared and Sam have done it before, but it will be Paul's first time.

Lena feels, rather than hears, someone approaching from behind her, but she's too focused on putting paint to canvas to turn around and see who it is. She knows she only has a few more minutes of good light, and she wants to finish the outline of the cliffs. She's pretty positive she can finish the rest from memory, at home, but not if she doesn't get the outline down perfectly. Faster than she's ever painted before, she dips her paintbrush in the orange and then the gray and places stroke after stroke on her canvas. She doesn't think she's stopped once to step back and take a good look at her work, but she doesn't have the time. She has to have faith the picture will come together. Otherwise she'll be back again with a new blank canvas to start all over.

Her heart rate doubles when she hears Paul's voice from directly behind her, "Looks good..."

She spins around in surprise, her eyes wide, and says sharply, "I've told you before not to sneak up on me when I'm painting." She had known someone was there, but she wasn't expecting it to be Paul, and seeing him standing only a few feet away, shirtless, is definitely a huge distraction. She diverts her eyes and wonders, "What are you doing here?"

"I'm sorry," Paul replies, teasing her, "I didn't realize this was your own private beach."

"It's not," Lena says flatly, rolling her eyes and returning them to her canvas. She has a hard time concentrating though, now that she has an audience of one. Sighing, she asks, "Are you just going to stand there or did you come here for a reason?" She wipes her paintbrush off and places it down on the lip of the easel to dry. She's not going to be able to get anything else done tonight.

"I'm enjoying the view," Paul says, earning another look from Lena, which is exactly what he wanted. She frowns when she sees him looking at her and not the ocean or the sunset. "Am I bothering you?"

Lena has a hard time keeping her eyes on his face and not his perfectly sculpted chest and abs, and she swallows thickly as she admits, "Yes." She busies herself with putting the caps back on her paints and studying her painting for any flaws. She still has to fill in the details before it's finished, but she is happy with what she's done so far. If she can spend another hour on it tomorrow, she just may have her third art project finished, and with over a week left until school starts back up, too.

Paul shoves his hands in the front pockets of the cut-offs Sam loaned him, not sure what to say now. "So..."

"You're doing this all wrong," Lena says bluntly.

Paul frowns in confusion, "Doing what?"

"Pretending that I don't exist," Lena reminds him, "I think there's less talking involved, and more of you avoiding me." She places her paints in her art supply bag, along with her paintbrushes, and zips it closed.

"I never wanted that," Paul says as he watches her hands, "I never meant to avoid you."

"Are you bipolar?" Lena asks in frustration. He never meant to avoid her? She's pretty sure that's a load of bull crap. "If you never wanted to, why did you ignore me all week? Why did you leave work last Saturday? Why did you switch your schedule?"

He told Sam she'd have a buttload of questions for him, ones he doesn't know how to answer since they all involve his newly acquired shape-shifting skill, and the fact that he imprinted on her. "I am not bipolar," Paul says matter-of-factly, "I already told you I've been dealing with some weird shit and I can't explain it to you. But I didn't switch my schedule around to avoid you. I've been doing some work for Sam, and Saturday is when he needs me most."

"You've been working for Sam Uley?" Lena asks skeptically, one eyebrow raised.

"Yeah," Paul says slowly, "He's...moving, and I've been helping him fix up the new place." He feels bad for lying, but if Sam decides he is going to move into his dad's old place with Emily, the house probably will need to be fixed up, and if he offers to help then it won't be a lie.

"And last Saturday?" Lena inquires, hoping he'll have an explanation for running out on her then as well.

"I wasn't feeling right," Paul tells her, and this time it is the truth, "I had to get out of there. I didn't want to get you sick." Well, maybe the getting her sick part is a stretch. It's not like she can catch the shape-shifting gene; you're either born with it or you're not.

"Okay..." Lena accepts this answer, until she remembers that according to Leah he came back to work, after she left, and that's the night they had sex. "So then why'd you come back? Leah told me..."

"Yeah, I figured," Paul says, feeling frustrated, "But I wish she hadn't done that."

"Why?" Lena ignores the twisting knot in her belly as she claims, "It doesn't matter to me. I don't care what you and Leah did. I mean, good for you. But you obviously weren't that sick."

"Actually," Paul counters, "That's kind of proof I was sick, Lena. Do you really think I'd sleep with Leah if I wasn't temporarily out of my mind?"

Lena chuckles at the intensity in Paul's eyes as he expresses just how horrified he is at what occurred between him and Leah, reminding her much of how disgusted Leah was with herself when she admitted the two did the deed. "It is pretty...shocking. I mean, when Leah told me I almost didn't believe her. I guess I never thought you two were capable of getting along for long enough to, you know. But what's that saying? 'There's a fine line between love and hate', or something like that."

Paul scoffs, "I do _not_ love Leah, so that saying is dead wrong."

For some reason, hearing him state so positively that he doesn't have feelings for Leah makes Lena feel better about the whole situation. And that is scary. That makes her wonder what the heck is wrong with her. Why does she care at all who Paul does or does not have feelings for? "Maybe," Lena shrugs.

"Still mad at me?" Paul asks hopefully. Lena shrugs again, looking up at him through her thick eyelashes, but not giving him a yes or no response. He decides she can't be too mad since she's not scowling at him any longer. "Want a ride home?"

"I don't know," Lena comments, recalling how Leah said her first mistake was allowing Paul to drive her home last weekend, "You're not going to try and kiss me, are you?"

Paul grins mischievously, "Only if you want me to."

Lena ducks her head and hopes the sky is too dark now for him to see the blush on her cheeks. "In your dreams, Lahote," She mumbles as she picks up her easel, careful not to ruin her painting, and follows him to his truck.

* * *

Author's Note: Almost finished this last night, but I wanted to make sure there weren't any typos or anything. So here's your Tuesday update, as promised. I hope you guys enjoyed it!

Please Review! Let me know what you thought. I really appreciate the feedback. I also love hearing your concerns/suggestions/anything that's on your mind. What did you think of Emily helping Paul to change Sam's mind? What do you think is going to happen next? I'll give you a hint, next chapter just may include the first day of school. I will update as soon as it's finished :)


	13. Chapter 13

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 13! If you've stuck around this long, that is...It seems like I lost some of your interest last chapter since I only got 5 reviews :( Was it that bad? It was one of my fave chapters to write, so far (except, maybe, for this one). Either way, let me know what's on your minds. I love hearing your feedback, and it helps to guide me in the right direction while writing upcoming chapters. Drop me a line at the end and tell me what you liked/didn't like and what you're hoping to see happen. A few words of encouragement go a long way :)

I re-read Chapter 12 before writing this chapter, and I realize that I accidentally wrote 'Lena' in a place where I meant to write 'Leah' (It is corrected now) and I'm only just seeing how similar their names are. I hope that doesn't drive any of you crazy! If it does, I'm sorry. I really like the name Lena, and I think Paul &amp; Lena sounds good, so that's why I chose the name. Hopefully there aren't any other cases of confusion when it comes to Leah vs. Lena.

To my Reviewers: jace4ever, Guest, WriteAndDream23, Guest, &amp; MrsWaylandOdinsonBlack - Thank you so much for taking a moment to leave me some feedback, I really appreciate it :) To Guest (1): Yes! I think the episode where Peter is obsessed with Surfin' Bird is hysterical! Also, I have an uncle who loves that song, so that's where I got some of my inspiration for Lena's dad. My uncle sings Surfin' Bird and he substitutes the ooma-mow-mow part for my name (Mallory - so he says 'Ma-ma-ma Mal, Mal, Mal' etc.) He's done it ever since I was a kid and it cracks me up. Thanks for your reviews!

* * *

**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**13\. Come On, Let Me Hold You, Touch You, Feel You**

"What do think of this?" Sera asks as she steps out of the fitting room to show off yet _another _outfit to her three best friends. This time, it consists of a high-waisted, rust orange and sage green mini-skirt paired with an ivory blouse that has studs on the shoulders, and her new five-inch chunky wedge sandals that she just bought from the previous store. "I love the skirt, but I'm not sure about this shirt."

"It's cute..." Lena replies reluctantly, hoping her boredom isn't apparent on her face. She is really starting to regret accepting Sera's invitation to come back-to-school shopping with the girls in Port Angeles. The idea of the four of them shopping for new clothes together sounded fun in theory, but she'd forgotten how picky Sera can be, and how tortuously long she spends trying clothes on before making a decision. Of course, Sera is the one who drove them all out here in her new Toyota Scion that her parents purchased as a gift for Junior Year, so it's not like Lena can complain about how long she's spending in each store. Besides, today is Friday, so she can't use work as an excuse to get back to La Push any faster, and she agreed to sleep over Sera's tonight along with Kim and River, so she's really quite stuck.

"You look really pretty," Kim states kindly from her spot next to Lena on the designated waiting bench just outside of the fitting room Sera has been holed up in for the past forty-five minutes. Even she is starting to get annoyed with her friend, and it takes a lot to bother Kim, but they've been at the mall for close to four hours now, and she's about ready to leave. Her parents gave her two-hundred dollars to spend on school clothes and shoes, and she only has four dollars remaining, so she didn't even want to come in this store. But Sera did, and Sera has an endless budget, AKA her dad's credit card, so it's not likely she's going to be ready to leave any time soon.

River, who is seated on Lena's other side, sighs loudly before spitting out the truth, "Yeah, what they said. You look gorgeous, Ser; you always do! But that skirt is way too short to wear to school, and so were the last ten outfits you tried on. Do you actually plan on buying anything that isn't against the school's dress code?" Lena is so glad her cousin had the guts to tell Sera what was on all of their minds, because she certainly wasn't going to do it.

Sera's lips twist into a pout as she stares at her reflection in the giant full-length mirror that hangs on the wall. "I really like this skirt though..." She observes herself from all angles before announcing, "I think I'm going to get it anyways. Fuck the dress code. I'll wear it and if they send me home then, oh well!" She flips her hair over her shoulder and heads back to her fitting room, assuring her besties, "I have one more thing to try on, and then we can go get frozen yogurt. Okay?"

"Yup," River replies, looking to her cousin and rolling her dark eyes, "Sounds good."

Once Sera is inside the fitting room and the door is closed, Lena whispers, "She said that three outfits ago. How much do you want to bet she's got six more dresses in there?"

Kim closes her eyes and allows her head to fall on Lena's shoulder as she murmurs under her breath, "I'm so hungry!"

"I still need new sneakers," River states glumly, wondering if there's a way for her to sneak away and buy a pair of shoes without Sera finding out she'd ditched her.

"I was supposed to buy a birthday present for Cammie," Lena adds, also thinking of a way to get this done before next Sunday, which is when Cammie turns thirteen. She spent just over two-hundred dollars of her savings money on new clothes, but Sera hadn't allowed them to enter a store that sold something suitable for a thirteen year old's birthday gift, so Lena has one more item on her agenda.

"Please don't leave me," Kim says, clutching Lena's knee, her eyes wide. She can't be left alone to critique Sera's outfits. Sera says she's too nice and doesn't ever believe her compliments are sincere. They'll never be able to leave!

"Oh hush," Lena teases, "We're not leaving you." To River, Lena suggests, "Want to come to Forks with me Sunday? You can get your sneakers, and I'm sure I'll be able to find something for Cammie at that bookstore she likes."

"Good idea," River agrees, "I like your thinking, cousin. It's a date."

"Ew!" Sera complains from inside the fitting room, "This is the ugliest dress I've ever seen in my life. I am _not _showing you guys this." She unzips the offensive material and throws it to the floor, stepping on top of it as she re-dresses in the outfit she came into the store wearing. Once she's gathered up the items she is going to purchase, she swings open the dressing room door and announces, "Let's check out! I'm ready for some fro-yo!"

"Me too," Kim agrees, happily standing up and taking half of Sera's shopping bags on the way to the register since she has too many to carry on her own. She hopes her four remaining dollars are enough to buy her a nice vanilla sundae with fresh strawberries and whipped cream. If not, she's going to be slightly disappointed. River and Lena gather up their own bags and trail behind the two other brunettes on their way out of the store.

The mall is abnormally crowded today, most likely because of school starting back up this coming week, so it takes longer to check-out than Sera anticipated. It is almost 5PM by the time they leave the last store Sera was shopping in. After the four girls make a stop at the frozen yogurt stand, they squish around a small table in the food court with their many purchases and savor the sweetness as they gossip about their expectations for the upcoming school year. Sera is most excited to show off her new outfits, River is looking forward to her Pre-Calculus class with the Seniors, and Kim and Lena are eager to turn in their art projects they spent so much time working on these past summer months.

"Cammie's not starting high school this year, is she?" River asks after scooping her last bite of raspberry fro-yo from the bottom of her bowl.

"No, eighth grade," Lena corrects. "Maya is starting third, Cody is starting fourth, and of course Forrest is going into tenth. Noah is going into sixth, right?"

"Yeah. Raven is a freshman this year though," River shares the news of her fourteen year old sister joining La Push High, "And she's really nervous, so if you guys see her can you say hi? And be nice," She says this specifically to Sera, who made a habit of teasing the 9th graders last year.

"I'm always nice," Sera claims with an exaggerated eye-roll.

"Sure you are," River smirks, revealing a dimple in her chin which she inherited from her dad.

Abruptly changing the subject, Sera asks Lena, nudging her fairly hard with her elbow to get the girl's attention, "Hey, have you seen Paul lately?" Lena raises an eyebrow, not sure what that's supposed to mean. Of course she's _seen _Paul; he lives next door, or did Sera forget that? Sera gives Lena a pointed look as she elaborates, "He is _jacked! _And he got a tattoo?!"

Lena shrugs, feigning innocence as she denies, "Really? I hadn't noticed..." Truth is, she did see the tattoo Sera is talking about, it's on Paul's right upper arm, and it was kind of hard to miss it when he was driving her home from the beach last weekend and had no shirt on. She didn't get a decent look at it though, since she didn't want him to catch her staring, plus it was getting dark out.

"Oh, bullshit," Sera says bluntly, "Don't tell me you didn't notice that _hot bod._ Come on, Lena. We all know you love Embry, but that doesn't make you blind to other guys. You live next to a walking sex god; could you just admit you've noticed his hotness, at least once?"

Kim's eyes are wide as she waits for Lena to snap. Sera has been giving her crap all day, and Kim just knows this has to be the last straw. Lena can only take so much before she opens her mouth and tells Sera off. Surprisingly, Lena remains calm as she replies, "Fine. He's hot, all right? Does that make you happy, Sera? He's clearly been working out this summer, I think it's plain for everyone to see that. But so what? What's your point?" He's still just Paul. There's no reason to treat him any differently. He was already full of himself last year; Lena can only imagine how much it will inflate his ego if the girls fawn all over him and his new muscles the first day of school.

Sera laughs mockingly, "I only wanted to hear you say it. It's just us girls. It's not like Embry or Paul are here. What are you worried about?"

"I'm not worried about anything," Lena says, "I'm also not the one with the huge crush on Paul, you are. So why are you so interested in what I think about him?"

"I do not have a _crush _on Paul," Sera denies, taking offense to the accusation, "I just want him to fuck my brains out. That's all." She'd tell him directly, if he'd answer her phone calls or texts. He's been M.I.A. with her since June. It's kind of making her want him even more than she did before.

"Oh my god," Kim mumbles as she blushes deeply, wishing to be invisible. Sera has absolutely _no_ filter whatsoever and no sense of the volume of her own voice. There are so many people around them, like mothers with their children, and Sera is practically yelling about wanting Paul to F her! This is why Kim doesn't like to be seen in public with Sera. She ducks her head so that her thick black hair falls around her face like a curtain, hiding her from any prying eyes.

River shakes her head in disbelief, telling her friend, "Could you be any louder? Sheesh, Sera. Take it down a notch or two." She doesn't mind the conversation, but this is definitely not the right place to be having it. The least Sera could do is wait until they're in her car on the ride home to start talking about boys she'd like to sleep with.

Sera pretends to fix her hair and flashes River her middle finger. To Lena, she directs, "Just tell Paul to text me. I know you work with him Saturdays. I want to hang out with him before school starts back up." There's not a big window for opportunity, since school starts in exactly six days.

"I am not going to be your sex request messenger," Lena says seriously, still scarred over the knowledge of Paul's most recent conquest. She doesn't want to know about another friend's night of pleasure with Paul. She is positive Sera will be much more graphic with her descriptions of the act than Leah was, and Lena doesn't want to hear all that. "And besides, Paul isn't working on Saturdays anymore."

"Really? Well, if you see him..." Sera starts.

"No," Lena insists, gritting her teeth in annoyance.

"Text him yourself," River suggests sharply as she can see the discomfort on Lena's face, "We should probably get going. We still have an hour long drive home."

"You guys are no fun," Sera pouts her red-stained lips. "Come on. Let's go then, since you party poopers want to get home early."

**.**

"Hey!"

At the sound of her voice, Paul pauses, promptly forgetting what he came outside for in the first place.

"Paul..." She says his name in a sing-song voice, her tone a mix between sarcasm and amusement as she continues, "You're not ignoring me again, are you?"

"No," He replies as he turns in the direction of her house, only she's not standing where he thought she'd be. In fact, she's nowhere to be found. "Lena?"

She giggles with delight, her warm breath tickling his neck as she is now directly behind him. _How did she do that? _Paul wonders how she could be so quick and stealthy as he turns around in surprise. Ever since his change, his hearing is so much improved that nothing and no one has been able to sneak up on him yet. Lena smiles up at him, seeming pleased with herself. She allows her dark eyes to roam over every dip and crevice of his bare chest before reaching out with one hand and giving his rounded bicep a squeeze. "Jeez, Paul," She comments, "You really have been working out."

Something about the way the words spill from her lips causes Paul to frown, but before he can say anything in response, she's running her hand down his arm, causing electric shocks to tingle across his skin wherever she touches him. "You're burning up," She notes with concern, "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine," He assures her, reluctantly stepping out of her reach to prevent her from questioning him any further about his body temperature.

Lena raises an eyebrow, regarding him through suspicious eyes as she questions, "You sure about that?" Paul nods confidently, which causes Lena's lips to twist into a highly amused smirk. He's about to ask her just what's so funny when she points to his waist-line and and chuckles out, "Why are you naked?"

Paul scoffs, "I am no..." His voice trails off when he glances down and observes that he is, in fact, standing before his neighbor naked as the day he was born. He shakes his head in confusion. _Where the fuck did my pants go?_

He looks up again when he hears Lena's laughter echoing through their backyards as she runs away from him, towards the woods behind their houses. "Come here," She calls over her shoulder, "I want to show you something."

He starts after her, cautioning, "Lena, wait," but she doesn't heed his warning. Before he even takes two steps in her direction, she's already disappeared into the dark woods. Paul quickly follows, wondering what she's up to and why she's behaving so strangely. Then again, he's the one not wearing any clothing, so he's starting to doubt his own sanity.

Once he's stepped into the shade of the woods, Lena appears at his side, taking his large hand in her smaller one and tugging him forward. "Come on," She's insisting, "It's right over here."

"What is?" Paul queries, his confusion growing with each step they take.

Lena doesn't answer until they are both standing at the edge of the little creek where they used to play as kids. Lena would hop from one rock to the other, crossing the creek and back without getting a drop of water on herself. Paul, on the other hand, would splash right into the shallow water, scaring off all the frogs he so desperately wanted to capture. Any time Lena spotted and scooped up one he hadn't frightened, she'd gloat about it, showing him the frog without actually allowing him to hold it. He had a temper, even back then, because he'd splash her until she was soaked and they'd both go home wet and angry with each other. "This," Lena says, adjusting her stance so that she is facing him, with her back to the creek, "is the spot where you kissed me."

Paul's forehead wrinkles up in thought, but he can't seem to recall a time that he'd ever kissed Lena. Sighing impatiently, Lena states, "Don't tell me you don't remember." She crosses her arms in annoyance as she explains, "You were eleven, and I was ten. It was a few weeks before my birthday. You were teasing me for saying that I was going to marry Embry one day, so I splashed you..." She reaches down, sinks her hand into the water and then flicks it at his face, smiling mischievously. "And you chased me, remember?"

Suddenly, he does remember; little Lena and her indignant expression when he told her she'd never marry Embry Call, the shock on her face after she sent water flying at him, as if she couldn't believe she'd just done that, the squeal she'd let out when he started to chase her, and finally the satisfaction he felt when he finally caught up to her.

When Paul nods, Lena's smile grows as she tells him, "You caught me, and then you kissed me."

"And you pushed me into the creek and ran home," Paul concludes as the memory comes back to him clearly.

Stepping closer, Lena inquires, "Why did you kiss me?" Her eyes are locked on his, her expression as wide-eyed and innocent as it was the day he kissed her in this exact spot.

"I don't know," Paul answers with a shrug, wishing he had a better response for her.

Lena raises an eyebrow while simultaneously pulling away from him, distancing herself from his fiery hot body. "Why?" She repeats, firmer this time.

Paul shakes his head, "I don't know. I don't remember. I guess I just wanted to, so I did."

Returning to her previous spot, just inches away from him, Lena places her hands on either side of his face, tracing his jawline as she whispers, "Do you want to kiss me now?"

Does he want to kiss her? Is that a serious question? Of course he wants to kiss her. She's driving him crazy right now, with her hands all over him and her scent filling his nostrils so all he can see and breathe and feel is _Lena. _Instead of answering her question outright, he wraps his arms around her, crushing her against his chest, and pressing his lips against hers, desperate to taste her...

And then he wakes up, in his bed, with her words from that Sunday night nearly two weeks ago echoing through his head, 'In your dreams, Lahote.' Damn it, she was literally haunting his dreams. This is the tenth night in eleven days he's woken up from a dream about Lena, nearly all of them leaving him with a strong sense of longing and a raging boner when he wakes up. It reminds him, not so fondly, of his puberty days when he'd wake with wet boxers almost every morning, thanks to the wild sex dreams he'd been having all night long. He would probably enjoy the dreams of Lena better if he thought there was any chance of him acting out those scenes with her in real life, but since he doubts himself so much they are only a terrible tease of what he can't have. He is lucky this morning that he was pulled from his fantasy, by his alarm clock, early enough to avoid an uncomfortable arousal. He is still pretty hot and bothered though, mostly because he should have known by now it was only a dream; Lena wouldn't have done or said any of the things she did, and he was friggin' naked and strolling around like it was no big deal! How much more obvious could it get that he was dreaming? Still, the kiss had been real, the one that dream Lena reminded him about from when they were just kids. He'd completely buried the memory, so why was he recalling it now?

Paul finally reaches a hand out to his nightstand and turns off the alarm clock, which had been broadcasting some morning talk show up until now. For a moment, he doesn't know why he set his alarm to wake him up for 6:45am on a Thursday, and then it clicks: today is the first day back to school. He swings his legs over the edge of the bed and stands up, stretching out his limbs. He opens his bedroom door and immediately reaches for the doorknob of the bathroom, which is directly across the hallway from his room. He doesn't really think about why the door would be shut until he feels the steam pouring out of the room and sees the girl of his dreams standing in his shower, dripping wet and completely nude. Well, for a flash second, before Lena squeaks and wraps her towel tightly around her body. Still, it was definitely the best .02 seconds of boob Paul has ever seen in his life, so he should be thanking his lucky stars he's not grinning from ear-to-ear at the moment.

"Um, I _swear_ I locked the door," Lena mumbles, totally in shock and one-hundred percent embarrassed. Her face is probably red as a tomato, and she will never be able to look Paul in the face again knowing that he's seen her naked. She wishes she brought over a bigger towel.

Lena's coconut-scented bath products are invading his senses and it takes him a moment to register what she said. The lock on the door, right. He'd broken that the day he phased for the first time, and he hadn't exactly gotten around to fixing it yet. He doesn't tell Lena this though, because at this point he's unsure whether he's awake or still trapped in a dream. What are the odds that she would show up right as he was having a dream about her? And that he didn't hear her come into his home or turn on the water to take a shower? Was he that deeply asleep? Stupidly, he asks, "How are you in my bathroom?"

Lena fidgets under his stare, _Why won't he look away?! _She answers him as quickly as she can, "Your dad let me in! Cammie was being a diva and went way over her time limit, and Forrest didn't take a shower last night when he was supposed to. I'm sorry, okay? But jeez, could you get out of here so I can get dressed? Seriously, Paul, go!"

Paul snaps out of his daze as it dawns on him that he is very much awake and making Lena extremely uncomfortable. "Sorry," He mumbles as he pulls the door closed. He steps further into the hallway, shaking his head and wondering what the hell just happened.

In record timing, Lena is dressed and rushing out of the bathroom in the Lahote's house, hoping to avoid another encounter with Paul on her way outside. Unfortunately, she runs into him, quite literally, as she exits the bathroom. Bracing herself with her hands against his bare chest - _What is with him never wearing a shirt anymore anyways? _\- Lena pushes off quickly, almost like it burned her to touch him, and she backs away, covering up her complete mortification with annoyance, "You couldn't have gone into your room or something? This is seriously the last time I'm coming over here to take a shower." She's said that before, but she means it this time; that was way too embarrassing to risk occurring twice. "And what just happened? _That _is not something we are ever talking about again." She twirls around and practically makes a run for the front door.

"I wasn't going to-" Paul starts to say, but Lena interrupts him with a loud, "Shh! I said we're not talking about it!"

**.**

"Oh my God. Oh my God." Kim mutters under her breath as she mazes her way through the crowded school hallway at the end of the day in search of her best friend, "Oh my God. Lena!" Kim calls out her name when she finally sees her.

Lena looks up from the scrap of paper on which she had written down her locker combination, the one that isn't presently working, and waves to Kim as she approaches. "Hey, what's up? How'd it go?" She asks, referring to the rest of her first day, since they discovered last week after receiving their schedules in the mail that the two only share two classes together this year: English and Art. And, of course, lunch. Today is a half-day, so they only saw each other this morning for English, and won't have Art class until tomorrow. At least Lena has Embry in her Trigonometry class, plus Chemistry, and she has American History with River, and French with Sera to look forward to. The one person she discovered she has many classes with this year is the one person she was desperately trying to avoid today, and that's Paul. He's in the same period as her for English, Chemistry, History, and Native American Studies! Last year, they only shared one class, and now they're in four classes together. Maybe she should have let him flunk his finals.

Ignoring her words, Kim grabs Lena's hands and squeezes tightly as she shares the news, "Jared is in my Chemistry class."

"Okay..." Lena says slowly, wondering why this is such a big deal. She thought Kim had mentioned he was in her Native American Studies class this morning, as well, and she wasn't freaking out then. Obviously, Lena knows about the giant crush Kim has had on Jared since, well, forever, but she doesn't usually act so crazy. "And?"

"And," Kim gushes, her eyes darting around to ensure Jared isn't lurking around nearby, "He talked to me."

"Really?"

Kim nods, "Uh-huh! He asked to borrow a pen. And when I gave it to him, he...he looked at me like he was seeing me for the first time. Like, before now he didn't know I existed, but now he does. It was so weird." She shakes her head, blushing fiercely, "I know it sounds crazy, Lena, but...something happened. He noticed me." She smiles weakly and Lena pulls her in for a hug.

"You don't sound crazy," Lena reassures her, "He's the crazy one, for not noticing you sooner."

Another set of arms wraps around the two girls' forms, and then River is cooing in their ears, "Aw, group hug! What are we hugging about?"

Saving Kim the embarrassment of repeating herself, Lena whispers to her cousin, "Jared Cameron talked to Kim, and they had a moment."

River smiles in excitement, "Kim! That's awesome! It's about fucking time."

"For what?" Sera asks as she joins the group of girls gathered in front of Lena's locker. Before any of her friends can reply to her question, she's already spotted something over their heads that needs her attention more. "Hey, Paul!" Her lips curl up in a flirty grin, "I was looking for you earlier. You never texted me back the other day." She assumed there must be something wrong with his phone. Why else wouldn't he reply to her very direct text asking to hang out?

"Yeah, sorry," Paul lies as his eyes bounce from the back of Lena's head to Sera's expectant expression, "I was...uh, busy. I forgot."

Hearing his voice causes Lena's cheeks to basically light on fire. She feels naked again, and she wants to run away and hide. But she really can't, because she has to get in her locker. She turns towards the stubborn thing and attempts once more to enter her combination. When it doesn't work, she sighs in frustration, mumbling, "What the fuck? Stupid locker..."

"It's probably not working," Paul points out as he steps closer, "Because that's not your locker. It's mine."

_You've got to be kidding me, _Lena thinks to herself when she glances up and sees that Paul is right. She was trying to open the wrong locker the whole time! Hers is the next locker down, on the right. Instead of thanking him, Lena glares at Paul before silently reaching for the correct locker and opening it on the first try.

"So," Sera attempts to regain Paul's interest, "What are you doing with the rest of your day?"

Paul barely hears Sera, since he's so focused on Lena and how on-edge she's been all day. Every time he's seen her, she's turned around and walked off in the other direction. Every class they've shared together, she's made sure to sit as far away from him as possible. He realizes she's avoiding him because she's embarrassed he walked in on her in his bathroom this morning, but how long is she going to act this way for? He thought things were finally going back to normal between them, but clearly he fucked all that up earlier. _Again._

River and Kim exchange a look, both of them finding it strangely amusing that Sera is trying desperately to capture Paul's attention, while he is totally focused on Lena, who is giving him the cold shoulder.

"You're making a big deal about nothing," Paul says casually, opening his own locker and tossing in his new books for the year.

Lena looks at him out of the corner of her eye as she neatly stacks her books and notebooks inside of her locker. "I really don't think I am."

"You are," Paul insists, "I already told you I wouldn't say anything; at least, I tried to tell you."

"That's funny," Lena says sarcastically, turning marginally in his direction, "Because it sounds like you're talking about it right now, and I'm pretty sure I said never to talk about it."

Sera finally catches their words and slowly questions, "What's...going on?"

"Nothing," Lena replies with finality, hoping Paul will take the hint and shut up already.

"I just have one thing to say..."

Lena huffs, "What?" She slams her locker shut and turns to face Paul, arms crossed in irritation, which reminds Paul of when she did so in his dream last night, right before telling him about the kiss they shared long ago.

"That thing that happened this morning," Paul states, inwardly smirking at the death-glare Lena is trying to give him, "You know, that we're never talking about again? Well, I was thinking, and it's really only fair that it happened."

Now River, Kim, and Sera are exchanging looks of confusion; what the hell is Paul talking about?

"Uh," Lena's mouth opens in shock, "How exactly did you reach this conclusion?"

"Well, now we're even," Paul says pointedly, closing his locker quietly. "You saw me that one time, and now I've seen -"

Lena gasps and slaps a hand over his mouth, squishing his lips together with her fingers to prevent him from finishing that sentence. "Shut up," Lena whispers, "You saw nothing."

When she drops her hand, all Paul can think about is how badly he wants to kiss her because she looks so damn sexy right now. And all Lena can think about is that her catching Paul strolling around naked in his own backyard is _not _the same as him walking in on her getting out of the shower. Stepping away from him, Lena scoops up her backpack, slings it over her shoulder, and turns towards her friends.

"Can we go now?" She asks quietly.

Kim and River nod right away, Kim looping her arm through Lena's and heading towards the front doors of the school since the day is over. River follows along, confused, but willing to keep her mouth shut. Sera, on the other hand, isn't having any of it.

"No," Sera says loudly as she hurries to catch up with Lena, "No, we are not pretending that didn't just happen. What was that?"

"Ser..." River cautions, "Maybe now isn't the best time."

"I don't care," Sera presses on, "What the hell was that, Lena? Why was Paul..."

Cutting her off, Lena spills in one long breath, "Look, I took a shower at Paul's this morning, and he didn't know I was there, and he walked in on me, and now I want to die, and I never want to talk about it again. All right? Can everyone just let it go now?"

None of the girls say another word until they get outside. "He walked in on you?" Sera's eyes are wide as saucers as she asks for clarification, "Paul saw you naked?"

"Sera!" River chides, wondering how her best friend could be so stupid, "She just said she doesn't want to talk about it. Give her a break."

Sera starts laughing and waves her hands diffusingly as she explains, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry! I can't help it. It's funny."

"It's not funny," Lena insists with a frown, "It's embarrassing. How am I supposed to look him in the face after this? What am I supposed to tell Embry?"

"Why would you tell Embry?" Sera sighs, "Lena, nothing happened. You don't have to tell your boyfriend. It's not like you cheated on him. So, Paul accidentally walked in on you? What's the big deal?"

Agreeing with Sera, for once, River adds, "It's pretty obvious he feels bad about what happened. And you didn't do anything wrong, Lena."

"Yeah," Kim agrees, "Don't blame yourself for something that happened completely by accident. I know you're embarrassed, but you will be fine. Paul seemed like he was trying to put it behind you."

"At least he wasn't teasing you about it," River points out, "And I don't think he told anyone since I haven't heard any crazy naked Lena Fawling stories being spread throughout the school."

"Thank God," Lena sighs in relief. Spotting a familiar face in the crowd, Lena announces, "There's Embry. I'll see you girls tomorrow, all right?"

"See you," Kim and River reply at the same time.

Smirking, Sera jokes, "My silence requires a debt, Missy. You know what to do."

Rolling her eyes as soon as her back is turned, Lena wishes it were socially acceptable for her to smack her friend in public and not receive any backlash. Sera is going to blackmail Lena into talking to Paul for her if she wants it to be kept a secret that Paul saw her naked this morning? What kind of a friend does that to a _friend _they've known since Kindergarten? Sera is starting to become a nuisance, and Lena isn't sure how much longer they'll be friends if she keeps this up. She tries to shake off the lingering annoyance as she approaches Embry and gives him a hug. He smiles at her fondly before pulling her in for a deep kiss.

* * *

Author's Note: Holy long chapter! I wasn't expecting this to be so long, but I had a hard time finding a good place to stop. What are your thoughts?

Please Review! I'd really appreciate your feedback. What did you think of this chapter? What do you want to see happen in upcoming chapters? I will consider all of your suggestions :)


	14. Chapter 14

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 14! Welcome to the new followers, there are just under 100 of you now, that's pretty awesome :) Thanks to those who have favorited this story so far, 1 away from 50!

To my Reviewers: Momsen-xxxx, shadygrl91, Guest, Imprint obsessed, jace4ever, hayhay196, Twihard, belladu57, &amp; A Reader - Thanks so much for your comments! I'm getting the feeling a lot of you don't like Sera...correct me if I'm wrong? Haha, kidding! ;) I know she's not a very likable character, I created her that way on purpose. I was thinking about a friend of mine who I had been friends with from very young all the way up to high school, and how she changed into a person I wasn't sure I had much in common with anymore. It's hard drifting apart from friends, but it does happen, and it is happening with Lena &amp; Sera.

* * *

**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**14\. The Look In Your Eyes Makes Me Crazy**

"Happy birthday, dear Cammie!" Lena sings loudly, ignoring the stink-eye her mother sends her across the table since everyone else had used her sister's full name, "Happy birthday to you!" She doesn't know what her mom has against nicknames, but that's her problem. She beams at Cammie while she blows out her candles, and then the whole family claps and congratulates the new thirteen-year-old on the start of her teenage years.

Except for Maya, who is only worried about one thing. "What kind of cake is this?" She asks her father loudly, thinking back to Lena's cake, which was also frosted all-white and hid the cake beneath, "It's not chocolate again, is it?"

"Not this time, sweetie," Simon replies with a chuckle, "It's carrot cake with cream cheese frosting. That's Camille's favorite, and it's her birthday."

"Aw, really?" Maya slumps down in her seat, thoroughly disappointed at the news. Carrot cake is even worse than chocolate cake. She announces to her family, "When it's my birthday, I want vanilla cake with strawberry frosting, and sprinkles; lots of sprinkles."

Cody kicks his sister's chair from his spot beside her as he taunts, "Your birthday was just a few months ago, stupid. My birthday is next."

"Hey," Simon sternly scolds his youngest son, "Don't call your sister stupid."

While their father isn't looking, Maya sticks her tongue out at Cody. He wants to argue that it's Maya's fault for being so annoying, but he knows better than to say that. He's done it before, and all it's ever gotten him is in trouble. "Sorry," He mumbles.

In a moment, Winona is passing her two youngest children their pieces of cake, and both are content to eat it in silence. After all her complaining, Maya announces after the first bite that the cake is really yummy. Winona cuts four more pieces of cake, and sits down at the table with her family. She cuts into the moist carrot cake, which she made completely from scratch, along with Lena's help, earlier this morning while Camille was at the Market. She'd decided now that she was thirteen, she'd continue with her three-hour Sunday shift to both help out and start saving for college. She wants to become a veterinarian when she's older, since she loves animals, and Winona couldn't be more proud. As she lifts the fork to her lips to take a bite, Winona catches a whiff of the cake and her stomach churns. She stands up quickly and runs for the bathroom.

"Honey," Simon calls after her, rising from his own chair to check on his wife, "Are you all right?"

"What's wrong with Mom?" Maya asks, looking to her eldest sister for an answer.

"She said she wasn't feeling very well earlier," Lena explains, "but I'm sure she's fine."

"Oh God," Cammie moans, dropping her fork to her plate with a clatter, "Is it the cake? Is something wrong with it? Are we all going to get sick? I can't get sick..."

"Cammie, relax," Lena suggests, "You're fine. Nothing is wrong with the cake. Mom didn't even eat any yet."

"Yeah, really," Forrest teases, "What are you so worried about getting sick for?"

Cammie looks down shyly as she admits, "Cheerleading tryouts are on Wednesday. It's my last chance to try before high school. I don't want to chicken out again, like I did last year."

"Oh no," Forrest groans, "_You _want to be a cheerleader? No offense, Cam, but you're not the most coordinated..."

Seeing her younger sister's face fall, Lena quickly interjects, "What do you know about cheerleading, Forrest? I'm sure Cammie would be great at it. Have you been practicing a routine?"

"Uh huh," Cammie nods, "Quinn and I have been practicing together ever since we found out about the tryouts on Thursday. She's coming over tomorrow after school. Will you watch us?" She asks her sister hopefully.

"Sure," Lena agrees. She has about an hour once she gets home from school before she has to leave for her afternoon shift at the Market. She usually spends it doing homework, so she doesn't have to do it after eight which is when she'll be back from work, but she can make an exception this one time.

Noticing that Cammie has finished with her slice of cake, Lena pushes her purple gift bag in the girl's direction and prompts, "Here, open this. It's from me."

Cammie lifts aside the silver tissue paper to reveal a brand new journal in her favorite shade of emerald green, a set of pens in various, bright-colored ink that sparkles when it is put on paper, and a small hard-covered book. "What's this?" She asks curiously as she pulls the book out to inspect the cover.

"It's about women who have careers working with animals," Lena explains as Cammie flips to the book over to examine the back, "It starts with a veterinarian, and talks about other women who work as animal trainers, bird handlers and interpreters, and I think there's a horse farm owner. The women talk about how they prepared for their careers and how they got their positions. I thought you might like it."

Cammie looks up from the book and smiles brightly, "Thanks Lena! This is really cool."

Simon returns to the dining room and tells his children, "Your mom isn't feeling well. She's resting in bed. Lena, could you and Forrest make sure the kitchen gets cleaned up?"

Lena nods. She was expecting to be given clean-up duty, despite being on cooking duty, so the request comes as no surprise. At least her dad is putting Forrest to work as well. He nearly always has an excuse their mother will fall for. Normally, Lena would ask for Cammie's help, but since it's her birthday she has the day off from doing chores. Maya will sometimes help, but she slows down the job quite a bit, and Cody isn't even allowed to do the dishes because he's broken more glasses and plates than Lena can count. For a boy so talented at baseball and basketball, he's a total klutz in the kitchen.

Surprise, Surprise; when it actually comes time to clean-up the dishes, Forrest disappears upstairs and into the bathroom for his nightly shower. Lena shakes her head as she carries the dirty dishes from the dining room to the kitchen sink by herself. She is so used to him ditching her that she doesn't even bother to complain. She'll most likely finish faster without him complaining and dragging his feet anyways.

When Lena is finished with the dishes and wrapping up the leftover cake with some plastic-wrap, Simon pokes his head in the kitchen and states, "Ah, there's my Lena-bird. Thanks for your help tonight."

"Sure Dad," Lena says with a shrug, sending him a small smile. It's not like she could have refused; she was only doing what was expected of her. Besides, as strange as it sounds, doing dishes is somewhat calming to her. That isn't to say she enjoys all the other chores she has to do, because she doesn't, especially not cleaning the bathroom or mowing the lawn, which are her least-favorite duties.

"I know your mom really appreciates it," Simon adds as he approaches his daughter. "I was just on the phone with your Aunt Shayna. She's going to go to the Market in the morning and open up for me, so I can take your mother to the doctor. She hasn't been feeling well for over a month now. I think it's time she go and get checked out."

"What's wrong with her?" Lena asks, feeling slightly panicked at the thought of some awful disease plaguing her mother, "Is it serious?"

"We won't know until tomorrow," Simon says gently, "But don't worry, bird, your mom's a tough girl. She'll be fine, you'll see." He pats Lena's cheek affectionately. "The reason I'm telling you this is because your mother and I will have to leave early tomorrow morning, to get to Forks in time for her appointment, and I need you to see your siblings on their buses."

Lena realizes what this will mean: she's going to miss her own bus. The middle school bus, which comes for Cammie, arrives five-minutes before the high school bus, at 7:15am. Both schools start at 7:55am and dismiss at 2:30pm. The elementary school, where Maya and Cody attend, starts at 8:00am and dismisses at 3:00pm, but the school bus doesn't come to pick them up until 7:35am.

While Lena is still pondering over how she'll get to school on time, since the high school is a twenty-minute walk from her house and she knows she won't make it to her first class before the late bell rings, her father suggests, "Why don't you ask Paul for a ride? It's supposed to rain very hard tomorrow morning." Winona may think Paul is a trouble-maker, but Simon knows him better and he believes the boy has a good heart. He hasn't had it easy and he's misunderstood, but he's not a bad kid.

Lena's eyes immediately shift to the window above the kitchen sink, which looks out at the Lahote's porch and front-half of their house. She hasn't been over there since last Thursday, when she had the misfortune of being walked in on while toweling herself dry after a shower. She's had nightmares about that happening, and Paul made one come true. She's still extremely embarrassed about it, but since her friends found out and assured her it's no big deal, and when she told Embry this morning and he laughed it off as well, she realized she was probably acting silly. It's not like Paul did it on purpose, and there are worse things that could have happened, so she's trying to let it go. "I guess I could ask him," Lena finally replies.

Ten minutes later, after cutting two generous pieces of carrot cake for Paul and his father and placing them on a thick paper plate, Lena is standing on her neighbor's front porch and rapping her knuckles against the door. There are lights on inside, but no voices or footsteps. Lena thinks she hears a TV, but it's so faint she's not sure. She waits a full minute, maybe more, before knocking a second time. Both Paul and Eli's trucks are parked in the driveway, so she has to assume they can't hear her knocking or they simply don't want visitors at the moment. Lena backs away from the door with a sigh and decides she'll have to send Paul a text and see what his response is. It's his loss, really. Now he doesn't get a piece of cake.

Halfway to her own front door, a voice cuts her off, "Lena?"

Her head turns in the direction of the backyards, where Paul is emerging from the woods...buttoning up his pants? Lena is puzzled at the sight, wondering if he's decided in order to become more one with nature he has to go on naked nature walks through the woods or something equally as strange. Whatever it is he's doing, she doesn't think she wants to know. _Well, _she admits to herself, _I do kind of want to know...just not right now. _She shakes her thoughts from her head and waits until Paul has closed some distance between them before she greets, "Hey."

"Were you looking for me?" Paul asks, unsure. Last he knew, she was still annoyed with him, so why would she be seeking him out? Of course, another part of him is aware this imprint business has affected her too, or so he's been told, and maybe she's been wanting to see him like he's been hoping to see her.

"Yeah," Lena nods, "I, uh, brought you some cake. It's carrot cake, for Cammie's birthday. And I sort of have a favor to ask you, so I figured..." She holds the paper plate which the slices of cake are sat on out for him to take, "How could you say no if I brought you some cake?"

_I couldn't refuse you even without the cake, _Paul replies to her in his head. He takes the cake from her hand, resisting the urge to grab her hand 'accidentally' simply as an excuse to feel her skin on his for a moment. "Thanks, so what's this 'favor'?"

"Give me a ride to school tomorrow?" Lena requests hopefully. "I have to wait for Maya and Cody's bus to pick them up, so I'll have to miss mine."

"Okay," Paul easily agrees. _That's it? _He wasn't expecting a ride to be all that she needed from him, but he's not complaining. He'll get to spend twelve minutes completely alone with her on the ride to school. And, even better news, she's no longer hiding from him because of what happened last week. He really thought she'd avoid him for longer, and he's glad she proved him wrong about that.

"Okay," Lena repeats, "Thanks. The bus comes for them at 7:35, so don't leave without me."

"I won't," Paul assures her with a funny smile on his face.

Lena finds it strange that his words combined with that expression put butterflies in her belly. She backs away from the shirtless male with an awkward wave and a half-smile. "See you...tomorrow," She says, feeling breathless. She turns and forces her feet to walk steadily towards her front door and inside the house. She frowns at her reflection when she catches sight of her slightly-flushed cheeks in the mirror that hangs in the hallway. Since when does Paul make her act like a breathless, blushing fool? Those feelings are reserved for Embry only. Is she really so shallow that her hormonal, teenage body is betraying her heart by developing an attraction for _Paul?! _She can't allow it to happen.

**.**

"I had my schedule switched around before the first day of school so I'd have more classes with you," Paul says casually on the ride to school.

Lena looks over at him in surprise, trying to judge from the profile of his face if he's telling the truth or not. "You did not," Lena says, deciding that he must be messing with her.

His dark brown eyes flick in her direction for a moment as he claims, "I did." Then he returns his eyes to the road.

Lena frowns, asking slowly, "Why would you do that?" She can feel her heart pounding loudly in her chest, and she doesn't know if it is in fear or anticipation of his answer.

"It was the only way I knew for sure I'd see you," Paul replies smoothly, "School is the only place I knew you wouldn't be able to avoid me."

"Avoid you?" Lena protests, feeling a spark of anger ignite, "I haven't been avoiding you. I think you're getting a little confused. It was you who ignored me, remember? Ever since you came home from Tacoma you've been acting different."

"Things are different," Paul states factually. He suddenly drives past the school without even slowing down. He continues as if it weren't out of the ordinary for him to have passed their destination when they only have five more minutes until the final bell rings, "I'm different. So are you."

"Paul, what are you talking about?" Lena questions impatiently. "Why did you pass the school? Where are we going?" She can't ditch on the third day of school, and not when Paul is acting so weird either.

"Don't you want answers, Lena?" Paul asks her, "Don't you want to know why I came back from Tacoma so angry? Why I took off for a whole week? Then I came home naked - _that _must have been a strange sight to see. Aren't you curious to know why?"

"Of course I am," Lena admits, "but you said it was complicated and you couldn't tell me about it." She looks away from him and out the window, realizing he's driving in the direction of the beach. Lena bites her lip in worry as she points out, "We're going to get in trouble. We'll be late if you don't turn around."

Paul slows the truck to a stop and turns to look at Lena fully, reaching out with his right hand and placing it over her left, which is lying flat on the seat next to her thigh. "Do you want answers, or do you want me to take you back to school? I'll do whatever you want to me to, but you have to pick one or the other." He squeezes her hand gently, and Lena feels the heat from his hand warming her skin in a pleasant way.

She nods fervently, "I want answers."

"That's what I thought, Fish Sticks," Paul says in a teasing tone, releasing her hand, much to her disappointment, and placing both of his on the wheel once again, "That's what I thought."

Lena settles in her seat and looks out the window as Paul eases the truck back onto the road. They will be at the beach in a few minutes, if that's where Paul is taking her. It doesn't seem like she'll be getting any answers before they reach their destination. When Paul signals left and turns his truck into the parking lot at First Beach, Lena looks over at him again, and she blinks in surprise when she notices he isn't wearing a shirt anymore. _Where did his shirt go? _Lena wonders if she's going crazy, _I swear he had on a black t-shirt a minute ago..._With the shirt now missing, her eyes are immediately drawn to the tattoo on his arm. She hadn't gotten a very good look before, but now as she stares she realizes it is not so easy to interpret. Her eyes are pulled in all different directions, and the circular tribal tattoo appears to be a dizzying design of curves and lines. She isn't sure what she is looking at, however she is sure there are at least one pair of eyes, if not more, etched into the skin on Paul's arm. Without realizing she's lifted her arm, she finds her index finger tracing the thick black outline of his tattoo, liking the tingling sensation in her finger as it trails across Paul's hot skin.

"Where did your shirt go?" She asks in a husky tone that surprises her as it emerges from her throat.

Paul glances down after turning off the truck's engine, as if he only just realized his shirt disappeared, "I don't know. That keeps happening to me lately."

His answer doesn't make sense, but Lena doesn't think too much about it. She unbuckles and shifts closer as she directs all of her attention to Paul. She places her wandering hands in her lap and prompts, "All right. I'm ready for answers."

"So am I," Paul concurs. "Remember last month, the last Saturday shift that I worked?" Lena feels herself frowning but nods her head all the same. "Something happened when I saw you. It was...the weirdest thing. I looked at you, and you looked at me, and it was...you looked at me like you'd never seen me before." He stares into her eyes searchingly, which makes her feel a bit dizzy. Those words sound familiar, but she can't remember where she heard them before.

"I don't know what you mean," Lena denies, although her tongue feels heavy and the words nearly stick to the roof of her mouth. She knows it's not true. Something did happen that day, she felt it too; it was like a shift occurred, between them, and she can't explain it but _something _changed. "You were sick," She reminds him lamely, "You had a fever. You aren't remembering clearly."

"Oh, I remember just fine," Paul corrects her, "You're too scared to admit you felt something too. You know you did. Ever since that day you haven't been able to look me in the face without blushing red or getting tongue-tied. Did you really think I hadn't noticed?"

_Damn him,_ Lena thinks as she feels her cheeks reddening at his accusation. "That's not true," She denies pitifully. It is true, and they both know it. Why did he have to say anything about it though? Couldn't he have pretended he hadn't noticed? It would make things a lot easier for her. It would at least give her time to fight these unwanted feelings for him.

"Keep telling yourself that, sweetheart," Paul teases, "We both know you won't be able to resist me for long."

Lena narrows her eyes at his cockiness, "What makes you think that?"

Paul smirks down at her and she notices she is sitting much closer than she was at the start of this conversation. She must have unconsciously slid closer to him as he was talking, and now her side is practically pressing up against his. She feels her cheeks warm even further, and she wishes there were a way for her to make him feel as put on the spot as she's feeling right now. "Maybe," Paul murmurs, his face a mixture of playfulness and desire, "because you can't stay away from me." He stretches his arm over her shoulder and pulls her flush against him, whispering in her ear, "It's okay, you don't have to pretend this isn't what you wanted." He pauses long enough for her to turn her head slightly in his direction, almost as if she's daring him to continue, "We both know it is." He lowers his voice even further, and his breath tickles her ear and sends a shiver all the way down her back, causing goosebumps to break out across her body.

Feeling like he's sucked all the air out of her with his words, Lena wonders, "How do you know what I want?"

Paul tilts his head so his mouth is hovering over the pulse-point in her neck. He says, "Because I want the same thing," just before placing his lips to her skin. Lena feels like her neck is on fire, and she gasps when he swirls his tongue around the most sensitive spot on her neck. Her right hand shoots up and grabs the back of his head, holding him in place so his hot lips can't leave her neck.

Lena can feel a moan making it's way up her throat, and she is shocked and shamed when she wakes up in her bed moments later, her heart hammering in her chest so hard that when she presses a hand against her clammy skin she can practically count the thunderous beats. She sits up quickly and flicks on the light on her nightstand. She breathes in and out deeply, hand still pressed against her racing heart. Slowly, as she takes in her surroundings and certifies that it was only a dream, she begins to calm down. She glances at the alarm clock and reads the time is 4:50am. "Shit," She curses under her breath, "What the fuck...?" She lays back against her pillow for a moment and closes her eyes, but when she does she sees Paul's face and she feels hot all over again. Her eyes pop open and she jumps out of bed like something bit her on the butt.

_Nope, _She tells herself sternly as she opens her dresser drawers in search of a jogging outfit, _You are not thinking about Paul that way. You did _not _just have an inappropriate dream about Paul. It did not happen. Nope, nope, and nope! _

Lena changes quickly from her sweaty pajamas into a tank top, jogging pants, and matching zip-up hoodie, and puts on her running shoes. She quietly descends the stairs and lets herself outside, where she takes off at a speed quicker than usual as she tries to outrun her guilty thoughts. By the time she arrives home nearly an hour later, the only other people awake in the house are her parents. She immediately goes upstairs to take a shower and start getting ready for school. Her run has helped to clear her head, and for that she is thankful.

**.**

Paul is sitting in his truck watching the clock as he waits for Lena. The heavy rain falls against his windshield in a lulling pattern that almost puts him to sleep. He can hear the loud rumbling of a school bus engine, and watches through his rear view mirror as a yellow bus slows in front of the Fawling home. Two little, blurred bodies run out from under the cover of the front porch and race towards the bus. The boy beats the girl, and as soon as they're both safely up the stairs, the bus doors slide close and the vehicle begins to move. A moment later, Lena is running across her yard towards Paul's truck, holding her backpack above her head to keep from getting soaked by the rain. She hops inside the cab with a heavy sigh, tossing her backpack to the floor and slamming the door behind her. She wipes a few stray raindrops from her forehead and reaches behind her for the seat belt.

"Hey," She says after clipping the safety belt in place, "Thanks again for waiting for me."

"No problem," Paul replies, turning the heat on low when he notices the goosebumps on Lena's bare arms. He angles the air vent in her direction and then reaches for the gear stick to put the truck in reverse. "I usually leave at this time anyways."

Lena nods absentmindedly, replaying bits and pieces of her unusual dream every time she blinks her eyes. She knows she's going to regret waking up so early, and the long, vigorous run she put her body through this morning, but she didn't know what else to do. She'd just been telling herself last night that she had to find some way to push past this awkward attraction she's been feeling for Paul, and then she goes and has a dream like that? Sure, it wasn't like it was a sex dream, but who knows if that's where it was going? What would have happened if she hadn't woken up? She can still feel his lips on the inside of her neck and she has to turn her head to look out the passenger-side window to hide the blush that creeps up her cheeks. She doesn't want Paul to know how weird she's feeling around him, and she hopes he hasn't already noticed that she's been 'blushing red and tongue-tied' around him, like he did in her dream. The thought of dream Paul and the Paul sitting beside her sharing the same thoughts and opinions is scary, and it makes her feel extremely exposed. Has something truly changed between them since his last Saturday shift at the Market, or did she make it all up in her head? She thought she'd cleared her head after her morning run, but unfortunately the second she saw Paul all the confusion came back to her full-force.

"You okay?" Paul asks after a few minutes of heavy silence. "You're pretty quiet."

Lena thinks it's safe for her to look in his direction without blushing, so she answers in as composed a tone as possible, "I'm fine, just tired, that's all." As luck would have it, she yawns into her hand at this exact moment, corroborating her story.

"Didn't sleep very well?" Paul glances over in concern. He woke up early this morning, before the sun was even up, and felt like something was wrong. He wonders if it was Lena; he'll have to ask Sam later if it's possible for him to have felt her discomfort. The feeling went away pretty quickly though, and he fell back asleep for close to two more hours.

Lena shakes her head, telling him briefly, "I had a weird dream. I woke up and couldn't go back to sleep."

The way her eyes dart quickly away from his after mentioning a strange dream has Paul questioning what kind of dream exactly she is talking about. Was it a nightmare? Or was it a dream about _him _like the ones he's been having about her almost every night? A big part of him hopes it's the latter, but he doesn't press her for details. "That sucks."

"Yeah," Lena agrees before divulging, "I'm sure the long run in the rain is another reason I'm feeling so tired, though. It was probably not the best idea, but," she shrugs, "I was already awake, and I had time to kill..."

"You went running in this weather?" Paul asks incredulously. Is she trying to catch a cold?

Lena nods, "I run almost every morning. I can't skip a day just because it's raining. It's usually refreshing, but this morning it was definitely cold."

"So you're a runner," Paul comments, "I didn't know that about you." He hadn't known about it before becoming a wolf, that is. He had seen her running a few times since then, but admitting that to Lena without being able to tell her _how _he saw her might seem a bit stalker-y.

"There are a lot of things you don't know about me," Lena says without really thinking about how it would sound coming out of her mouth. She winces at the strong flirtatious undertone she hadn't realized she possessed and blurts, "I mean, jeez, that came out weird. You knew what I meant, right?" She giggles nervously. _What in the world is wrong with me? _

Paul can sense her unease, so he laughs, "Of course." He wishes Lena wasn't so guarded around him all of a sudden. She never used to be so careful of what she said. He knew she'd be stubborn and push him away once he started showing his interest in her, but he hasn't even gotten around to doing that yet, and she's already treating him like a stranger.

When the high school is in sight, Lena sits up anxiously in her seat and holds her breath in anticipation. This is the moment in her dream when Paul bypassed the school and told her he was going to bring her to give her the answers she's been searching for. In reality, Paul slows down and turns into the parking lot, and for some reason Lena doesn't know whether to be relieved or disappointed. She lets her breath out slowly as she reaches for her backpack.

As soon as Paul has parked and cut the engine, Lena's hand is on the door handle, "Thanks again for the ride."

Before she can hop out and run away, Paul says, "You do realize we're going to the same place, right?" Her locker is right beside his, and they have American History together first period, so he'll only be following her if she does try and leave him behind. "Are you sure you're all right?" He knows he won't be able to focus in class at all if he thinks she's mad at him, so he has to get this off his chest, "You've been a little weird lately. Is it because of what happened last Thursday? Because if it is, I completely understand, and aside from right now, I haven't said anything about it because you asked me not to. I'm trying here."

"No, it's not that," Lena murmurs in a low voice, "I don't know, Paul." She sighs, "I'm trying too." She opens the door and ducks out of the vehicle while he's still pondering over her words.

_She's trying too? _Paul is puzzled, _What does she mean by that? _

* * *

Author's Note: Please Review, guys! I'm not sure how I feel about this one, so I could really use your feedback. Next chapter to come soon, though. I know what I want to happen next. And, now you all know that Lena is dreaming about Paul too! As always, I'm open to your suggestions and ideas.

**jace4ever:** Love your theory about Lena's mom...we'll find out next chapter if you are correct! :)


	15. Chapter 15

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 15! Thanks for following and for reading and favoriting! I appreciate it :) These chapters keep getting longer and longer, this one is the longest yet. Hope you guys enjoy!

To my Reviewers: Robyn . Girl . Wonder. 93 (FFnet doesn't like periods lol), jace4ever, Guest, Imprint obsessed, &amp; Seldomlaughs - Thanks for your feedback! A few of you have reached the same conclusion about Lena's mom, so we'll have to see if you're right ;) Sorry Lena's dream last chapter was only a dream, but I am a believer that your dreams sometimes represent problems in your life that you're trying to work through, and even though Lena isn't sure why she'd have a dream like that about Paul he is now at the fore-front of her mind. And that is a good thing :) I hope you guys enjoy this next chapter!

* * *

**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**15\. I Can Feel The Pressure**

"Did you talk to Paul yet?" Sera asks as she slides down the wooden bench at the cafeteria table where she's sitting with her girl friends, putting herself closer to Lena, who is spacing out badly. She's barely even touched her food, not that Sera finds Lena's homemade chicken breast and cheese sandwich with mayo very appetizing. She wouldn't eat it if it were her lunch either, but that's beside the point.

"Hm?" Lena vaguely heard Sera talking to her, but she didn't quite catch the words. She'd been too lost in her own thoughts. She blinks a few times before fixing her eyes on her friend's face.

Sera raises her eyebrows, mimicking Lena's dazed, "Hm?" She gestures across the room, where Lena had been looking before, and reminds, "Yeah, you know the guy you were just staring at? You were supposed to talk to him for me?"

Lena's eyes dart back to their previous spot and she realizes Paul is indeed sitting where she'd been staring, only she wasn't purposely staring, and he is now looking at her almost like he could hear Sera from all the way across the room, but that's not possible. "I wasn't staring," Lena corrects, "I was thinking about something. And I didn't know he was sitting there." She hadn't even known she'd been dazing out until Sera pulled her from her stupor. How was she to know Paul was sitting where she happened to be looking? It's only a coincidence that her thoughts happened to be focused on him at that very moment, and nothing more.

"Whatever you say," Sera rolls her eyes, "Will you stop avoiding my question?"

"No," Lena finally answers, "I didn't talk to him for you. I never agreed to in the first place. And I told Embry about what happened, so you have nothing to bribe me with, even though that was extremely messed up." She turns her attention to her sandwich and reluctantly takes a bite to distract herself. She has enough conflict going on in her own head, she doesn't need to be fighting with Sera too.

"What is your issue, Lena?" Sera demands in a haughty tone, "Why won't you talk to him for me? Do you have something against me and Paul getting together?" She narrows her hazel eyes suspiciously.

"Oh my God," Lena frowns at her friend, "I don't have an issue, Sera. I don't give a shit what you do with Paul. I just don't want to be involved. If you want him, talk to him yourself. He's right over there. All right?" She waits for Sera to nod before she swiftly scoops up her uneaten sandwich and heads for the nearest garbage, dumping her food on her way out of the cafeteria. She shouldn't have snapped at Sera, but she couldn't take any more of her harassment. She already told her she didn't want to talk to Paul for her. The girl can't take 'no' for an answer. For all Lena knows, Paul already rejected Sera, and she's not taking 'no' for an answer from him either. Whatever the case, Lena has no desire to be in the middle of _that _disaster.

Kim watches her best friend storm out of the cafeteria and quickly gathers her things to follow. She hadn't heard the exchange between Lena and Sera, but she could take a guess as to what the subject matter was: Paul Lahote. For some reason, that boy is causing all kinds of drama in her group of friends, and she doubts he even has a clue about it. Glancing across the cafeteria, she finds Paul is seated in the furthest corner, closest to the Emergency Exit door, and right beside...Jared Cameron. Kim's heart staggers in her chest at the sight of him, and she blushes scarlet when Jared looks up from his tray and smiles right at her. Kim smiles bashfully before tilting her chin forward so that her long, straight hair falls across her face, and then she turns and walks off in the direction Lena went. It is only after she's put some distance between herself and the boy who has long held her affection that she realizes how strange it was to see Jared and Paul together. _Since when are they friends? _Her face crinkles up in confusion, _They don't even hang out with the same crowd..._

As she rounds the corner and spies Lena standing in front of her locker, Kim quickens her pace, waving when the other brunette takes notice of her. Lena pulls her Chemistry book and notebook out of her locker before closing it, and turns to lean against the wall of blue metal lockers as she watches Kim approach. It is only when she sees the slight color in Kim's cheeks, a dead give-away that she's been in close proximity with Jared Cameron, that she recalls what Kim said to her last week after discovering the boy was in her Chemistry class. "He talked to me," She had said, "He looked at me like he was seeing me for the first time. Like, before now, he didn't know I existed, but now he does." Lena can practically feel the gears in her brain working to figure out why Kim's words were so important, and then it clicks. Last night, in her dream, Paul had said something very similar, - _I looked at you, and you looked at me...you looked at me like you'd never seen me before -_ and at the time the words felt familiar but she didn't know why. Now she does. Kim had said almost the same thing when retelling the moment Jared first spoke to her. What she doesn't understand is what that has to do with her and Paul. It was only a dream...only she can't stop thinking about it.

"Hey," Kim greets as she copies Lena's posture and leans her back against the lockers. "Why'd you leave?"

Lena shrugs one shoulder lazily as she retells, "Sera. She won't stop bugging me about talking to Paul. I just don't understand why she won't let it go. I mean, why do I have to talk to him for her? Why can't she go up to him and talk to him herself?" The more she talks about it, the angrier it makes her, "She had no problem sending him half-naked pictures last year, and throwing herself at him after ruining _my _birthday present, but now all of a sudden she's trying to play shy? It doesn't work that way. Paul knows she's not fucking shy! He's not stupid. I bet she's still mad at me for not letting her sleep at Paul's the night of the music fest, and this is all to get back at me for ruining her chances with him. Well guess what? I do not care!"

Kim's eyes are wide and she purses her lips together, not having expected such a strong reaction from Lena. This whole Sera wanting to hook-up with Paul thing is affecting Lena much more than she originally let on. "Well, you told her you're not going to talk to him for her, right?" Kim asks quietly.

Lena rolls her eyes, "Yeah, but knowing her, she won't listen."

Kim nudges Lena's shoulder with her own and points out, "That's Sera's problem. Not yours. Let her worry about getting inside Paul's pants, all right? You just worry about you." Not missing the small frown that appears on Lena's pretty face as she mentions the potential Sera and Paul hook-up, Kim starts to wonder if there's something going on with her best friend she is not aware of. Cautiously, she questions, "Are you sure it doesn't...bother you...that Sera wants Paul's attention?" Immediately after the words leave her lips, she wishes she could take them back.

"No," Lena denies loudly, disbelieving Kim would accuse her of something so ridiculous, "It doesn't bother me! Why would it? I have no reason whatsoever to be _bothered _by what Sera and Paul are doing in their spare time. Is it really so weird that I just don't want to know about it?"

"Of course not," Kim soothes, "I didn't mean - I wasn't trying to upset you, Lee. I only wanted you to know that you can talk to me. Any time, about anything." She pulls on her lower lip with her teeth in worry before adding quietly, "I can't help feeling like something's going on with you. You've been acting -"

Lena cuts her off, stating dramatically, "If one more person tells me I'm acting weird or different lately, I swear to God I will throw myself out a window!"

The bell signaling the end of lunch rings, and Kim laughs when it causes Lena to jump in surprise. She then jokes, "Well, we're on the first floor, so...I don't think you'd do much damage."

"Oh, ha-ha," Lena says sarcastically, "You're so funny. Thanks for your support."

"Like I said," Kim replies genuinely, giving Lena's closest shoulder a squeeze, "Any time."

**.**

Lena sits on the worn brown leather couch in the den, eyes on the two young teens as they stand in the middle of the room, hands on their hips, and face her. Quinn looks at Cammie and nods her head once before they start chanting, "Push it to the top, push it to the top!" They lift both arms straight up in a touchdown motion. "Falcons won't be stopped," They continue, arms criss-crossing as they pump their fists from left to right. "We'll pop and lock," The girls say as they break out a few dance moves, "We'll rock and roll. We won't stop to take a poll." They place their hands on their hips once more as they repeat the words from the beginning of the cheer routine, "We'll push it to the top. Push it, push it to the top!" They hold their final pose, both smiling widely.

Lena claps and comments, "That was great!" Recalling Cammie's earlier warning to be critical, she adds, "Maybe smile more, though? You want to look like you're having fun the entire time. Especially at the tryout. Don't forget to smile, and look like you're excited doing the routine."

"You're sure we don't look like idiots?" Quinn questions skeptically. It was Cammie's idea to sign-up for cheerleading tryouts, and she's still not sure she wants to participate. If they make total fools of themselves the second week of eighth grade, she is going to place all blame squarely on Cammie's shoulders.

"I promise you don't look like idiots," Lena reassures the girl with a laugh. "You've still got tomorrow to practice, too. You guys have nothing to worry about."

"I hope you're right," Cammie says anxiously.

Just then, Winona comes out of her bedroom, light pink bathrobe on since she's spent the whole day in bed, and strides into the den. She has a pallor in her cheeks that accurately reflects how nauseated she's feeling inside, and a squint in her eyes that suggests she was awoken from a much-needed rest. Winona puts a hand to her head in exasperation as she asks, "Why aren't you doing this outside?"

"It's raining," Cammie replies, her eyes flicking from her mother to her sister nervously. She hates to cause a conflict, and she had no idea her mom was sleeping. She told her parents last night that Quinn would be coming over after school today. It seems like maybe her mom forgot...

"I'm afraid if you want to keep practicing," Winona attempts to ease back on showing her annoyance at being disturbed, since she knows how sensitive Camille can be, "you girls will have to go to Quinn's house to do it. I already asked Forrest to spend some time over at the Clearwaters, and Lena is going to bring your brother and sister to the Market with her so that I can rest." She sends her eldest daughter a pointed look, in hopes that she won't be argumentative in front of Camille's friend.

"I...am?" Lena questions as she tries to recall when she was asked to do this. _This is the first I'm hearing of this, _Lena decides.

Sensing drama on the horizon, Cammie quickly agrees to her mother's request, "I'm sure we can go to Quinn's house, right Quinn?" She links her arm through her best friend's and gives her a poke in the side with her elbow.

Catching on, Quinn nods, "Yeah, my parents won't mind if you stay for dinner either."

"Cool," Cammie says with a smile. She looks to her mom and says sympathetically, "I'm sorry we woke you up, Mom. I hope you feel better soon."

Winona finally looks away from Lena, long enough to reply to her middle child, "Thank you, Camille, so do I. And thank you, Quinn. Make sure you girls take an umbrella." Camille and Quinn head out of the room with their backpacks in tow, and Winona turns her dark brown eyes back to Lena. She sighs heavily, "Why do you insist on pushing me on everything, Lena?"

Feeling a bit lost, Lena shakes her head, "I don't know what you mean. I wasn't 'pushing you' about anything. It's just that you confused me because you made it sound like I already knew I had to bring Cody and Maya to work with me, and I didn't know that." She shrugs innocently.

"Is it too much to ask to get the house to myself for a few hours?" Winona demands, "Really? Is it? I do so much for you kids, and now I need a little time to myself. Can you try and understand that, Lena?"

"I never said that," Lena says with an unintentional eye-roll, "I can take Cody and Maya with me; it's not a problem." She sure wishes she could get some time to _herself _every once in a while too.

"Don't roll your eyes at me, young lady," Winona shakes her finger angrily in Lena's direction, "I don't appreciate your attitude right now. I need you to start stepping up and acting more responsibly. You are sixteen years old! I expect more from you. Two years from now, you'll be eighteen - _an adult_ \- and you'll be on your own."

_On my own? _Lena repeats in her head, _So when I turn eighteen she plans to kick me to the curb? Awesome. __And she thinks I'm irresponsible and don't help out enough? Double-awesome. _Lena bites her tongue, tasting the bitterness of her mother's unfairness. She helps out an awful lot. In fact, if anyone in this house is slacking off, it's Forrest, but for some reason her mom doesn't see it that way. It is Lena who works at the family store five days out of the week, on top of attending high school and keeping her grades high enough to surpass her parents' expectations, and it is Lena who does most of the chores as well as help with the cooking and watching of her siblings. What more could she possibly do? Thankfully, she can hear Cody and Maya's school bus rumbling up the road, so she excuses herself, "There's Maya and Cody. I better go tell them they're coming with me." She walks out of the room without a backward glance, asking herself what she did to deserve the wrath of Winona Fawling.

Ten minutes after collecting her siblings from their bus, Lena is ushering the two outside so they can start walking to the Market. She pops open a big, black umbrella and holds it above all of their heads as they stroll down the cement walkway towards the road. They have all brought their homework with them, Lena mostly in hopes that she'll be able to get hers finished during the breaks between customers at her register since Mondays are one of the slowest shopping days. Cody brought along his GameBoy to keep him occupied once he's finished, and Maya packed some blank paper and colored pencils to draw with. Before they've even made it to the end of the walkway, they are being asked, "Want a lift?"

Lena turns her head in surprise at the sound of Paul's voice. She hadn't thought he'd be home. Last year, he never came home right after school, he was always out with his friends or at football practice or flirting with girls. It's too early in the year for football practice, but it's still strange that Paul would choose to hang out at home instead of with his friends. What's even stranger is that Paul is dressed in his Fawling Market uniform. Raising an eyebrow, Lena asks curiously, "Where are you going?"

"Where does it look like I'm going?" Paul shoots back teasingly. "Same place you are. Your dad just called and asked if I'd cover him for the evening. He said something about your mom being sick?"

Lena nods, "That would be why I'm bringing these two to work with me." She looks to Cody and Maya, wondering, "You guys want to ride in Paul's truck?"

"Yeah," Maya says in an excited tone, while her brother shrugs and points out, "It's better than walking in the rain."

Guiding the two towards the gray truck, Lena is suddenly grateful to have them with her. She can only imagine how awkward it would have been for her to work with Paul alone today after that dream she had last night, and the confusion she's been feeling about it ever since. At least now she has Maya and Cody to distract her, and that stupid argument with her mother. Although she can hardly call it an argument when it was totally one-sided, and she hadn't meant to piss her mom off in the first place. Clearly this illness is equipped with killer mood swings. A frown finds its way on Lena's face as she opens up the passenger side door to Paul's truck and helps Maya climb into the back seat. Cody hops up on his own as Lena is mentally check-listing her mother's symptoms. _Mood swings, _Lena lists off first, e_xhaustion, nausea..._Lena tells her siblings to buckle up as she gets in the front seat and puts on her own seat belt. _Oh fuck no...please let me be wrong about this._

Paul notices that, for the second time today, Lena seems completely distracted and maybe even a little upset. "Everything good?" He asks her after a few minutes of unbearable silence. They're about to pull up to the Market already, and Lena hasn't said more than three words to him since accepting his offer of a ride.

Lena releases the lip she's been biting on and replies in a non-convincing tone, "Yeah." Part of her wants to tell him what's on her mind, but she can't with Cody and Maya listening in the back seat, and she's not sure if she should since things have been so weird between them. Maybe she's making it worse though, by consistently shutting him out when he's trying to fix things between them. "Well, no," Lena decides, "But..." She tips her head in the direction of her siblings and hopes Paul will understand.

Paul nods, "Gotcha." He's relieved it's not him this time.

Paul turns his truck into the parking lot in front of Fawling Market, and parks by the entrance doors. Lena unbuckles first and hops out so she can let Cody and Maya out of the back, and they quickly run inside to say hello to their father. Lena lingers by the door as she waits for Paul to pocket his keys and follow her inside. After ensuring her brother and sister are out of earshot, Lena shares, "My mom was mad before I left. She basically told me I was bringing Cody and Maya to work, and when I asked her why, she went off on me. She said I'm not responsible enough and, like, I don't help out enough, which is such bullshit. I can't even believe she would say that. I do so much and she doesn't even care."

Shocked and pleased that Lena decided to tell him what's going on with her, Paul comments, "That sucks. You're probably one of the most responsible people I know."

Lena half-smiles at the compliment, and opens her mouth to tell him her theory, but her dad chooses then to walk out of the office and call across the store, "Hey you two. Come here. I need to show you how to lock up before you leave."

Once Simon is convinced he's leaving the store in good hands, he takes off. Lena sets up Cody and Maya in the back with their homework and tells them she'll come check on them in a little bit, and she's going to make sure they've finished their homework. Feeling confident they'll do the work, Lena returns to the front of the store and takes her post behind Register 1. The store is completely empty at the moment, and Paul is straightening up the magazine rack in between the registers.

Assuming she may not get another uninterrupted moment, Lena confesses, "I think my mom might be pregnant."

"What?" Paul looks up from the magazines, his eyebrows raised in obvious surprise. "Really?"

"Yeah," Lena nods, pursing her lips together in distaste. "I mean, she's been sick for over a month. She's been moody, tired, and anything sweet makes her sick to her stomach. I didn't realize it at first, but the last time she acted like this was when she was pregnant with Maya. She had morning sickness for almost her whole pregnancy, and her mood swings were out of control. One minute she was happy as a friggin' clam and the next she'd be sobbing hysterically about nothing." Lena shakes her head in disappointment, "I can't believe it though. It's fucking ridiculous. What the hell were they thinking? Six kids? They're going to have _six_ kids?! Our house is too crowded as it is. I can't even imagine adding a baby to the mix. Where is the baby going to sleep? My room was the nursery for Cammie, Cody and Maya when they were babies, but then mom said she was done with babies, so I finally got my own room. If they try and kick me out of my room and make me share with Cammie and Maya, I'm going to be so mad." Lena barks out a bitter laugh, "And she says _I'm _irresponsible?! What a joke! She's the one who got knocked up, not me. No wonder she expects me to 'step up' and take on more responsibility. What more can I do? Does she want me to raise the kid once it's born too?"

"Hey, whoa," Paul says, stepping close enough to reach out and place a heavy hand on her shoulder, "Calm down. It's going to be okay."

Up until he started massaging her shoulder comfortingly, Lena hadn't realized she was on a brink of crying. She blinks furiously and swallows a few times, focusing on Paul's face. She is _not _going to allow herself to cry in front of him, especially not about something so stupid. Sure, her parents have, in her opinion, made a big mistake if they really are planning on having another baby, but it's not the end of the world. It's not _her _problem to get upset about, even if it is going to affect her life directly. She still knows that Paul is right though; everything is going to be okay.

"Sorry," Lena concedes, "You're right. I'm overreacting. I don't even know if that's what's going on. It was only a guess." She shrugs and Paul removes his warm hand from her right shoulder.

"Maybe you're wrong," Paul points out optimistically, "Maybe she's not pregnant at all."

"If she's not then that means she's really sick," Lena counters, "And then I'm going to feel like the worst daughter in the world for saying all those awful things about her."

"You're not awful, and you're definitely not the worst daughter in the world." Paul is finding out that hearing her talk negatively about herself makes him angry. Doesn't Lena know how awesome she is? Doesn't Mrs. Fawling see that her daughter is amazing and one-of-a-kind? How many parents can say they have a kid who is willing to take on a job at their family store five days a week and still find time for schoolwork and babysitting? Paul is willing to bet there aren't many. Not only does Lena manage to get good grades and complete her chores and get to work on time every day that she's scheduled, but she still has time for her friends and her boyfriend; the boy Mrs. Fawling wants her daughter to be with, no less. If Lena is still not good enough for her mother, then Paul thinks Mrs. Fawling must be a cold-hearted bitch. Lena couldn't be more perfect if she tried.

Lena blushes under Paul's intense gaze and drops her eyes to the floor as she tells him, "Thanks...for listening to my rant. I should go check on Maya and Cody real quick."

The rest of the evening passes quickly, and Lena is happy that she and Paul were able to act like their usual selves. Minus the fact that Leah and Shayna were missing, it almost felt like a good old Saturday shift. At one point, Paul had Lena laughing so hard she thought she was going to pee her pants. Then she laughed even harder when Paul asked her if she'd be more embarrassed about peeing her pants in front of him than she was about him walking in on her in the shower. It shouldn't have been that funny, but for some reason it was. And actually, when Lena really thinks about it, this might have been more fun than a Saturday shift since Paul didn't get mad or act immaturely once. It's been really nice.

"Are you sure the back is locked up?" Lena asks Paul for the second time, "Both doors?"

"Yes, it's locked," Paul reassures her, "I checked twice, but feel free to go check yourself if you don't believe me."

"No, I believe you," Lena explains, "I just wanted to be sure. I've never done this before. I don't want to screw up." The fact that her dad trusts her and Paul enough to lock up the Market on their own is a big deal, and Lena isn't sure Paul knows it but she certainly does.

"Can we go now?" Cody begs from the front door, where he and Maya are waiting with their backpacks on in hopes it is time to go home, "It's already 8:15. We're barely going to have time to watch one show before bed."

"Quit whining," Lena says as she and Paul meet the two kids at the front of the store, "We're leaving now." She flicks off the remainder of the lights and they all step outside. Paul leads the way to his truck while Lena locks the two front doors securely. She pulls on them a few times, just to be sure, and then joins Paul and her siblings in the truck.

The quiet ride home is much more pleasant than the one to the Market, and Paul is quite content with how the night worked out for him. His night isn't over yet, since he has to meet Sam still, but he got to spend most of it with Lena and that makes everything better. He's still having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that he's imprinted on his neighbor, but since it's happened he's been rethinking their whole relationship, and he thinks that maybe without the imprint there was always a chance for them. They were friends already, they clearly had an attraction for one another, and if it weren't for Embry being in the picture, who's to say what could have happened? Thinking about the imprint like that, like an indicator of what would have naturally happened on its own, is easier for Paul to accept than thinking of it any other way. Because if that's not how it works, then how is he ever going to convince Lena to give him a chance? He knows he should listen to Sam, and Emily, and even Jared, and just be her friend for now and continue taking things slow, but it's easier said than done. He was her friend before, but now he has thoughts about her that friends shouldn't have for their friends. He dreams about her almost every night, and it kills him that he can't do half of what he does to her in his dreams in real life. It's torture. He can't ignore forever how much he wants her, and everyone knows he doesn't have the best self-control.

When they arrive home, Lena is almost disappointed for the night to be over. How crazy is that? But she can feel the exhaustion creeping in from waking up so early, and she still has to finish her homework, so she reaches for the door handle. Only, when she pulls on the handle and pushes against the door, it doesn't budge. She looks over at Paul to tell him there's a problem with his door, but he's already unbuckled and leaned across the seat, and her body, to take hold of the door handle. He gives it a firm push, and the door opens. Lena breathes in sharply at his close proximity, feeling almost overwhelmed by the heat radiating off of him, and then his masculine, woodsy scent fills her nose and she suddenly wants nothing more than to feel his lips on her neck like they were in her dream.

Paul leans back slightly to look at her, the smallest of smirks on his lips when he sees the lust in her brown eyes. He tells her slowly, "Sometimes that door sticks."

His words snap her out of her thoughts and she nods quickly before wiggling out of the seat and away from Paul before she does something stupid. And with her brother and sister in the back seat! What is wrong with her? She helps Maya out of the car first, and then steps aside so Cody can jump out, landing perfect on his feet. The two race to the front door, knowing that the first to the TV remote in the den will get to pick the show they watch before bed. Lena is so ashamed of her own thoughts that she blurts out the first thing that comes to mind that will make her stop thinking of what she wanted Paul to do to her, and for some reason that happens to be, "You should text Sera back. She's been bugging me non-stop to talk to you for her. I wasn't going to, but..." She trails off, not willing to admit she only said it to distract herself from thinking about him kissing her.

"You want me to text Sera?" Paul can't believe that's what she really wants, not after the way she was just looking at him. Maybe he shouldn't have allowed himself to get so close to her, but he couldn't help it, it was too tempting to resist, and now he's paying the price for his action by Lena pushing him away.

"No," Lena denies, and then winces at her answer. She rephrases, "I mean, I don't care if you do or you don't. I just figured I'd pass along the message." She can't believe after all of Sera's begging and all of her denying that she'd tell him, she actually told Paul to contact Sera. She is dreading the smug look on Sera's face at school tomorrow when she tells the girl she got her way. Sera always gets her way.

Reading her face closely, Paul is pretty confident when he concludes that Lena doesn't really want him to talk to Sera. He overheard their argument at lunch today, about him, and that only further proves he's right in thinking Lena doesn't like the thought of him with another girl, or at least her close friend. He also doesn't think it's fair that she can feel that way but still be with Embry, but there's nothing he can do about that. Lena doesn't know she belongs with him, and she's not going to break up with Embry on a whim. She's too nice for that, and honestly Paul is afraid she cares about Embry too deeply to hurt him. She's stubborn, too. "Well...I'll tell Sera that I got the message then," He says, still watching Lena for signs of displeasure.

Lena forces her head to bob up and down in a neat little nod, "Good." She doesn't know why she wants to warn Paul _not _to talk to Sera, why it makes her so uncomfortable. She also doesn't know why this conversation puts a damper on the whole evening. "I gotta go finish my homework. See you tomorrow."

"Yeah," Paul returns, "Later." He is a little disappointed he couldn't get Lena to admit she doesn't want him hooking up with her friend, but he knows how she really feels. He thinks if he were to take Sera out, it would probably make Lena jealous, and maybe that would help her see she has stronger feelings for him than she is letting on. He's going to have to test his theory, though, and he's not sure where to start.

**.**

Thursday afternoon, right before Art, Lena is being dragged down the hallway by Kim towards the closest girls' bathroom, her wrist held in a vice-like grip. When Kim approached Lena with a wild look in her eyes a minute ago, Lena hadn't even had a chance to open her mouth before she was being tugged away from her locker by her stronger-than-she-looks best friend. Since then, Kim has mumbled a few 'Oh my God's under her breath, which has clued Lena in that this is most likely a Jared Cameron Emergency, as she's been calling them - in her head, of course. Now that they are safely entering a bathroom, Kim releases her hold on Lena's arm, and looks around the bathroom to assess how many potential eavesdroppers there are. Luckily, the bathroom seems abandoned, for the moment.

"What is it?" Lena warns, "Better tell me quick, before someone comes in here."

"Okay," Kim says, turning to Lena and taking a deep breath. As she releases, she confesses, "Jared asked me to go see a movie with him tomorrow night! I was so happy he asked, but then I realized we'd be alone, for the first time ever, and I kind of panicked."

"Did you say no?" Lena asks disbelievingly.

"No, no," Kim shakes her head, grinning widely, "I said yes, but...I asked Jared if he'd mind if you and Embry came along too. Kind of like a double-date, you know? You always said that would be fun, and Jared said he didn't mind, so you'll come, right? Please say you'll come, Lena. Please!" Kim grabs Lena's hands and squeezes them tightly as she bounces up and down on the balls of her feet.

Lena giggles at Kim's crazed behavior and says, "Oh, all right. We'll go with you. I'm sure Embry won't mind."

Kim squeals in excitement, "Thank you! Oh my God! I can't believe this is actually happening."

At the same moment, on the other side of the school in the gym, Jared is telling Paul the news that he asked Kim out, and technically she said yes. "I was hoping it'd be just me and her," Jared tells Paul as they walk towards the locker rooms to change for P.E., "but she's really nervous around me. She asked if we could double-date with Embry and Lena."

"What did you say?" Paul asks, suddenly much more interested in the conversation now that it involves his, well, Lena.

"I said yes," Jared says impatiently, "Obviously. What else could I say? I just want to take her out. If that means two other people have to tag along, then whatever. At least I get to be with her."

Paul is struck with a sudden idea, "What if it was four people tagging along?"

"What do you mean?" Jared asks, shooting Paul a suspicious look as he laces up his gym sneakers.

"I'm supposed to take Sera out," Paul explains, "It was Lena's idea, not mine, and I know she doesn't really want me to, so...let us come with you guys." He knows when Lena sees him with Sera, she'll have no choice but to face her feelings for him.

"Are you sure that's a good idea, man?" Jared asks cautiously, not understanding why his pack-mate would want to torture himself like that, "You know Embry is going to be there, right? He's going to be with Lena, his girlfriend, who he might kiss, and you think you can sit in a movie theater and keep calm? You don't think there might be a small chance you'll lose your temper and, I don't know, wolf out in front of everyone at the Port Angeles Movie Theater?"

"Not gonna happen," Paul says confidently, "I've seen them kiss plenty of times, and I haven't lost my cool yet. Well, except for when I almost lost my cool the other day, but that was different. It caught me off-gaurd. I'll be expecting it this time. I won't lose my cool. Jared, come on, I'll be fine, and you'll be there."

"Yeah, with _Kim,_" Jared reminds the other teen, "I don't need you scaring her off on our first date." Paul glares at Jared, who finally caves, "All right, fine, you can come - _if _Sam says it's all right."

* * *

Author's Note: Please Review! Next chapter, things are going to get interesting! :)


	16. Chapter 16

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 16! I can't believe we're 16 chapters in already! I am setting a goal of updating this story 2 times a week, since I'm due to have a baby in less than 8 weeks, and I know after my son is born I will probably not be able to update as frequently. Maybe I'll even finish the story before he's born, but since I don't have a prediction as to how long it's going to be yet, I really don't know if that will happen.

I also wanted to mention that I know 16 chapters without Paul &amp; Lena getting together might seem like a lot to some of you, but trust me, the story is headed in that direction, that I promise you. I did categorize this story romance/**angst **for a reason, so you'd know I wasn't planning on making things easy for our couple. Things are...complicated, and they are teenagers, so expect them to make some rash decisions and complicate things further. Beyond being teenagers, they're only human (sort-of, haha - most of them), and humans make mistakes. Keep that in mind :)

To my Reviewers: Momsen-xxxx, Guest, jace4ever, Guest &amp; Guest - Thanks so much for your comments &amp; suggestions! I appreciate it, and I definitely kept your feedback in mind as I was writing this chapter. I hope you enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: I think it goes without saying I don't own Twilight, but for this chapter I wanted to add that I also don't have any rights to either of the movies mentioned in this next chapter, The Illusionist or Accepted, which both were released in theaters in August of 2006. I was just trying to be authentic since that's when the story takes place ;)

* * *

**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**16\. I Noticed Your Eyes Are Always Glued To Me**

"I can't believe Sam agreed to this," Jared muses out loud after last period Friday afternoon, as he and Paul are walking to the parking lot, "How does he not see what a bad idea it is? I thought, for sure, he'd say no...Would you stop grinning like an asshole? This is a bad idea."

"I can't believe Sam agreed either," Paul says, not able to wipe the satisfied smile off his face, "But he did, so quit bitching. What are you so worried about?"

"Do you really want me to answer that?" Jared asks skeptically.

"I want you to relax," Paul suggests, "Just take it easy. Everything's cool. I'm not going to mess up anything for you and Kim."

"You better not," Jared warns, "I mean it, Paul." He has some concerns about Paul messing things up with his own imprint as well, but he already voiced his opinion last night when they talked with Sam, so he isn't planning on bringing it up again. Jared just doesn't see how Paul taking Sera out is going to prove anything to Lena other than the fact that Paul is a dumbass. He gets that Paul wants to spend time with Lena, he truly does; especially now that he's imprinted on Kim and can fully understand the intensity of the bond it creates. Still, he thinks Paul is going about this the wrong way. He's trying to rush something that simply can't be rushed, which is why Jared was confident Sam would back him up, but for some reason their alpha wants to give Paul a chance to try things his way. As skeptical as he is, Jared has no choice but to go along with it.

Laughing at Jared's 'serious face', Paul holds up his hands in mock-surrender and jokes, "I swear, I won't ruin your date with Kim. You won't even know I'm there."

"Fat chance that's gonna happen," Jared says, giving Paul a friendly shove off the curb of the sidewalk. Paul catches himself, like Jared knew he would, and then retaliates by punching Jared on the shoulder. Jared winces, "Dude, I push you, and you punch me?"

Paul shrugs, "It was a reflex."

"Yeah, sure," Jared rolls his eyes and reminds him, "If you punched anybody else that hard you'd really hurt them, you know."

"Yeah, well, lucky it was you then," Paul smirks as he twirls his truck key around his finger. "See ya later, buddy."

**.**

"Are you sure we shouldn't take one car," Kim asks Lena anxiously over the phone fifteen minutes before Jared is due to pick her up, "and just go together? I'm so nervous, Lena. I think I'm going to have a panic attack. What am I supposed to do alone in the car with him for over an hour? What am I supposed to say? Oh my God, oh -"

"Okay, stop with the 'oh my God's," Lena cuts in before Kim talks herself into hysterics, "You need to relax. Take a deep breath, and just chill out. Everything is going to be fine! I know you're nervous, but Kim, you've been waiting for your moment with Jared for so long, and it's finally here. This is exciting, not scary, and it's going to be great. Embry is on his way to pick me up right now. We'll be at the theater when you get there, and we'll all go in together. You have nothing to worry about." Lena remembers her first real date with Embry, and she wasn't even the slightest bit nervous, but she and Embry are completely different from Kim and Jared. She always knew Embry would be her boyfriend one day, and Kim only dreamed that Jared would notice her someday. This date is literally a dream come true for Kim, so Lena can totally understand why she's anxious about it. She reminds Kim, "I've got your back, girly."

"I know," Kim replies, taking Lena's advice and attempting to chill out, "Thanks again for agreeing to come. I don't think I could do this without you."

"Lena!" Winona calls for her eldest daughter from the bottom of the stairs.

"My mom's yelling for me," Lena says to Kim, "I should go see what she wants. I'll see you in a little while."

"Okay," Kim replies, "Bye."

After placing her cell phone on her dresser, Lena opens her bedroom door and steps out into the hallway. "Yeah?" She announces herself as she descends the stairs. When she reaches the bottom, she's a bit surprised to see her mother showered and dressed for what feels like the first time all week. She actually looks a lot better today, too. Deciding to find out if it's true, she asks, "Are you feeling any better today, Mom?"

"A little bit, hon," Winona says as she heads back towards the kitchen, now that she has Lena's attention, "Thanks for asking. Dad says you're going out with Embry tonight? What do you two have planned?" She opens the cabinet above the stove and pulls down a large pasta pot, as she plans on making spaghetti and meatballs for dinner.

Lena is put off by her mother's change in attitude; the last time they spoke was Monday when her mom got mad at her for no good reason. Since then, Lena's been waiting for the announcement that her parents are bringing a new addition to the family, but it hasn't happened yet. They also haven't shed any light on their mom's mysterious illness. If Lena had to guess, she'd say her parents are waiting for an opportune moment to drop the bombshell news on her and the rest of her siblings. Unless her mom plans to tell her now...

"We're actually going on a double-date," Lena explains, "with Kim and this boy she likes, Jared. We're all going to see a movie at the Port Angeles Theater."

"Oh, that's nice," Winona smiles, "What are you kids going to see?"

"Uh, good question," Lena says as she realizes she never even asked Kim that little detail, "I don't know. I think we might be deciding when we get there."

"How fun," Winona comments, turning to her lovely daughter as she debates whether or not to apologize for her behavior Monday afternoon. She was in a foul mood due to the unexpected diagnosis the doctor gave her that morning, and she took her anger out on Lena, which wasn't fair. It's just that her eldest daughter reminds her so much of _herself_ at sixteen, and she made so many mistakes in her youth. She is terrified for Lena to do the same, and she thinks that maybe because of that she has been smothering the poor girl. The past few years, their relationship has become rocky, and Winona knows it is partly her fault for being so hard on her eldest child. She has high expectations for Lena, and so far she has never been disappointed, but for some reason Winona is constantly waiting for Lena to mess up, and when it happens she won't be surprised because it will only prove she was right all along and her daughter is as much like her as she feared. She wishes she didn't feel that way, it does cause her guilt, but she can't help it. She thinks she's doing the right thing, by trying to protect Lena from making the same mistakes she did.

Before Winona can reach a decision, something catches Lena's eye out the kitchen window. "Embry's here," Lena announces happily, "I better get my shoes on."

"All right," Winona says to Lena's back as she leaves the room, feeling like she missed her opportunity, "Have fun. Don't stay out too late."

"I won't!" Lena reassures her as she runs up the stairs to grab her purse and shoes before returning downstairs to meet Embry at the front door. "Hey you," Lena greets with a smile, "You're right on time, like always." She throws her arms around his shoulders and squeezes him tight before releasing him.

"I wouldn't want to disappoint my lady," Embry replies with a wink. "Are you ready to go?"

"Yes," Lena nods, "Let's go. I promised Kim we'd be there when she gets there. She is so nervous. It's cute, though." Lena takes hold of Embry's awaiting hand and they walk to his mom's car together.

**.**

Upon arriving at the Port Angeles Movie Theater at five minutes to six, Lena seeks out her cell to give Kim a call and see how far away they are, only to find it isn't in her purse. "Shoot," Lena tells Embry, "I forgot my phone at home, on my dresser. Can I use yours to call Kim?"

Embry slides his phone out of his jeans' pocket and hands it to Lena, suggesting, "Let's go inside in case they're already here."

Lena nods and allows Embry to guide her across the parking lot with a hand on her elbow while she dials Kim's number in Embry's phone. Kim answers after the first ring, and Lena tells her she and Embry are at the theater. Kim replies that she and Jared should be there in less than ten minutes, but her next words come as a total surprise to Lena, "Sera and Paul should be there though. I think they're waiting inside."

"What?" Lena turns her head from left to right, rapidly searching the lot for Paul's gray truck, which she finds in a matter of seconds.

"Um," Kim asks quietly, "Didn't you get my text?"

"No," Lena replies, feeling strangely nervous now that she knows this double-date has turned into a triple-date, "I forgot my phone at home. When did this happen?"

"Jared told me when he picked me up," Kim says,feeling a tad awkward since Jared is sitting right next to her in his car and she doesn't want him to think she's upset or disappointed he invited a friend along too. She's not, but she knew it might be weird for Lena, which is why she sent her a heads-up text. Too bad Lena didn't get it until just now.

"Oh," Lena shakes off her discomfort, since this night is about Kim and not her, "Okay, well that's cool. See you in a few. Embry and I are just walking inside now." She ends the call and hands Embry back his phone.

Embry opens the door to the theater and politely ushers Lena inside before him. He's about to ask her what Kim said when he sees two of their classmates sitting close together on a bench across from the ticket counter. He knows without asking that Paul and Sera are here to see a movie with him, Lena, Kim, and Jared. They are currently browsing showtimes and discussing which movie to watch. Lena looks to Embry and sends him a one-shouldered shrug before she takes his left hand, laces her fingers through his, and tugs him towards the unexpected date-crashers. She already tried the double-date thing with Sera and Paul back in June, and it went horribly, so she's not exactly thrilled to be having a do-over. She hasn't had any other dreams about Paul, but the one she had Sunday night has been on her mind all week, driving her crazy. It seems like Paul is everywhere now, and there's no escaping him - not at home, not at school, not even on a date with her boyfriend - and the more she sees him the stronger that urge to kiss him gets. It's ridiculous, because she has way too much self-control to allow something like that to happen, and she'd never purposely hurt Embry, but anytime Paul is around it's like the lust takes over her brain and she can't think straight. She wasn't expecting him to be here tonight, and now she's worried what might happen. Embry squeezes her fingers lightly, almost like he can sense her nerves, and she smiles at him, grateful to have him by her side. She has nothing to worry about with Embry here.

Paul noticed Lena and Embry the moment they approached the doors to the movie theater, but he allows Sera to greet them first. "Hey guys," Sera waves when she sees one of the couples she and her date were waiting for, "Perfect timing. We can't decide which movie to see; there's a comedy, Accepted, or a romance, The Illusionist. What do you think?"

"Hey," Embry says with a friendly grin, directed at Sera, and then Paul, who gives him a casual nod. Lena pastes a smile on her face, even if she isn't thrilled to see the pair together.

"I already told you," Paul says to the girl who's been glued to his side the past hour and a half, eyeing Lena as he places his hand on Sera's thigh, right where her jean miniskirt meets her bare skin, "I'm not watching a romance."

"Come on," Sera wiggles closer to Paul, "It looks really good." She promised herself before she left her house that she'd be completely straight-forward with Paul, so that by the end of the night he knows exactly what she wants from him, and that is to be in his bed and between the sheets by midnight. Things seem to be off to a great start.

Lena clears her throat, stating uncomfortably, "We should wait until Kim and Jared get here and ask them." She didn't even know Paul and Jared were friends, but she isn't about to call her neighbor out about it now, in front of Embry and Sera. She supposes Jared Cameron is better company than the goons Paul usually surrounds himself with.

Paul slides his hand down Sera's leg to her knee, pats it twice, and then returns his hand to his own lap. He got the reaction he wanted out of Lena, and he doesn't want to make her unnecessarily nervous. She just got here a minute ago; he needs to pace himself. "That's what I said," Paul chimes in. Scooting even closer to Sera to make room on the bench, he offers, "Want to sit down?"

Lena eyes the available space beside Paul on the bench and shakes her head, deciding that it'd be too cramped for all of them to fit, "No, I'm fine. Em?" She turns to her boyfriend to see if he'd like to sit. He declines Paul's offer as well, much to Lena's relief.

"You sure?" Sera informs them, "The next showing for either movie isn't for thirty minutes."

Lena gives in and takes a seat, pulling Embry down next to her. "There. You two happy? We're sitting." She tries not to notice the lack of space between her and Paul's body, but every fiber of her being knows that he's _right _there, and she feels a chill run down her back. Why does his presence affect her so strongly? This never used to happen...Changing the subject, she asks, "What's this Illusionist movie about?"

"Oh, it's the one with Jessica Biel and Edward Norton," Sera eagerly answers, hoping to entice Lena to be on her side and force the boys to sit through a romance movie, "Norton's like a magician or something, and Biel is his love interest, only she's engaged to someone else, or something like that. Norton tries to win her back with his mysterious magician powers."

"Hm," Lena hums thoughtfully.

Paul grunts, "Sounds boring."

"I agree," Embry says on Lena's other side. If she's being honest with herself, Lena's more in the mood for a comedy anyways, or even a horror film. She'll wait for Kim and Jared though, since this is supposed to be their date, after all, and they should get the final say on the movie selection.

Speak of the devil, Jared and Kim are the next to enter the theater lobby. Lena is the first to stand up, happy to give her space to Kim or Jared if they want it. She doesn't think she can sit between Paul and Embry for the next twenty-five minutes or even five minutes. She feels super on-edge sandwiched in the middle of both of them. "Hey," Lena smiles at Kim, who has pinned her hair back and even put on a little makeup. She looks lovely, not that she doesn't normally, but she looks really, really happy. It lifts Lena's spirits to see her best friend on Cloud 9.

After ten minutes of debating, which Lena manages to stay out of, the group settles on seeing the next showing of Accepted, which now starts in just fifteen minutes. The group of six approaches the ticket counter and buys tickets before walking to the concession stand. Lena and Embry buy nachos, a large soda, and a package of chocolate covered peanuts to share. Lena has always preferred nachos to popcorn, and her favorite candy is anything involving milk chocolate. As she steps back away from the counter, Lena stumbles over Paul's foot - who was obviously standing too close to her - and nearly trips, taking her nachos to the floor with her. Paul catches Lena around the waist with one hand, while he steadies her plastic container of nachos with the other. When he positioned himself behind her, he hadn't anticipated she'd step back and trip; he was only smelling her shampoo, which is a sweet vanilla scent today instead of her usual coconut. He wants to ask why she switched, but he can't since that's obviously a really weird question. Lena stares up at Paul long enough to acknowledge how handsome he looks tonight before she straightens up and moves away from him, mumbling, "Sorry." She feels flustered and foolish and turns her head to look for the theater listed on her ticket, Theater 7. Her body is tingling where Paul's hands were placed moments before, and she's relieved no one can hear how quickly her heart is beating.

"You okay, babe?" Embry asks, causing Lena guilt for thinking another boy was handsome when her boyfriend is standing two feet away. What is wrong with her?

Lena nods ardently, "Uh huh." She uses her free hand to reach for Embry, drawing him closer to her and resting her arm in the crook of his elbow.

The entire time they're waiting for the other two couples to get their snacks, Lena is paranoid about seating arrangements. She'll just about die if she's stuck sitting between Embry and Paul for a whole hour and a half. She's plotting how to pre-arrange their seats putting Paul furthest from her as possible, without him knowing of course, when the group is ready to enter the theater. Lena walks close to Kim, asking her a random question about their art class, to ensure she'll get a seat next to Kim and Embry, and then hopefully Paul and Sera will sit on the other side of Jared. Instead, when they sit, Jared takes the seat on the end of the row, and obviously Kim sat next to him, Lena next to her, Embry next to her, and then Sera, and finally Paul. It wasn't what Lena originally anticipated, but she figures it still works in her favor. She's not next to Paul, and can - hopefully - enjoy the movie without him distracting her.

**.**

Accepted is turning out to be a pretty funny movie, and Lena is so glad the group chose something light-hearted versus the heavy romantic movie Sera wanted to see. Kim seems to be enjoying herself, since Jared has his arm around her and she's cuddled up to him. On the other side of Embry, Sera is also cuddled up to her date, one of her hands draped across his lap unabashedly. Lena pretends not to have noticed that. It should be darker in here so that her virgin eyes don't have to witness something she can't un-see. She focuses on the movie once more, not feeling the need to wrap herself up in her boyfriend's arms since they see each other all the time and she has plenty of opportunities to frisk him. It is when some girl on the screen yells out, "Glen, I love your wads!" that Lena turns her head in Embry's direction again, and it's only because she felt someone looking at her. It isn't Embry though, it's Paul. Lena returns his gaze curiously, since there's something so intense about his stare. It's almost like he's waiting for something, but she has no idea what he wants from her. Embry shifts in his seat and Lena's eyes snap back to the big screen. How long had she been staring? She tells herself she isn't going to look away from the movie again, especially since she sat away from Paul for a reason and she doesn't need Embry to catch her making eyes at Paul. Not even thirty seconds later, though, Lena's head turns again. This time, it's because she saw Sera move suddenly out of the corner of her eye; Sera decided she couldn't wait any longer, and she threw herself across the armrest at Paul, fusing her lips to his and boldly moving her hand closer to his crotch. Lena feels her stomach twist into a sickening knot, and her immediate reaction is to find an escape.

"Where are you going?" Embry whispers when he sees Lena start to stand.

"Uh, I..." Lena grasps at a reason to excuse herself, "I shouldn't have drank so much soda. Be right back." She shuffles past Kim and Jared and makes a dash for the exit door leading into the hallway.

Once out of the theater, Lena heads for the closest restroom, which is down a short hallway adjacent to Theater 7. She is glad when she finds the ladies' room completely abandoned. Standing at one of three sinks in front of a wide mirror that runs the length of the room, Lena turns on the cold water and freezes, staring at her reflection. She sees a wide-eyed girl with a perturbed frown on her forehead and lips turned down in a displeased pout, and suddenly she realizes she looks like this because she saw _Sera_ kissing _Paul_. As much as she disputed it didn't bother her that Sera wanted Paul, it does, and she's baffled by the reveal. Up until a moment ago, she truly had no idea she would feel this way, and it makes no sense. _Why? Why am I feeling like this? _She wonders, shaking her head and running her hands under the cold water before lifting them to her cheeks and forehead in an attempt to snap out of it. _Why am I being so weird? What is going on with me? _She turns off the faucet and reaches for a paper towel, drying her hands first and then patting her face dry. The cold water didn't exactly have the effect she wanted, but short of hiding in the bathroom until the movie is over, Lena doesn't know what else to do to get rid of her discomfort.

_Suck it up, _Lena pep-talks her reflected self, _You're just thinking about that dumb dream again, and that's all it was: a dumb dream! Walk out of this bathroom, get your ass back in the theater, and watch the damn movie like you're supposed to! This is Kim's night, and it is supposed to be perfect. Psycho-analyze this neurotic behavior later on..._

Taking a deep breath, Lena nods once, as if accepting her own advice, and then turns away from the mirror. She releases the breath slowly, taking another as she grips the door handle and swings it open. She only has one foot out of the door when she sees the source of her confusion leaning against the wall about ten feet away. He has his thumbs hooked in the front pockets of his jeans and his eyes fixated on the bathroom door, clearly waiting for her to come out. Lena hesitates, but eventually steps forward, allowing the door to fall shut behind her.

Unexpectedly, Lena feels anger flare up within her and she snaps, "What? What do you want from me, Paul? What are you doing out here?"

Paul shrugs as he steps away from the wall and closer to Lena, "I just wanted to make sure you're okay." The second Lena fled the theater, he knew he'd made a mistake and taken things a little too far. He should have known not to trust Sera in a dark theater, but he was distracted by Lena. Whenever she's around, all he wants is to be with her, and as much as he tries to keep his distance he can't because he's drawn to her like a magnet.

"Why wouldn't I be okay?" Lena asks sarcastically, "Because, for some reason, you're trying to make me jealous?" She doesn't know how he knew she left the theater because of him, but she plans on denying it until he believes her lie. She doesn't even know why she reacted the way she did, so for Paul to question it immediately puts her defenses up. "Shouldn't you be a little less worried about me and a little more worried about Sera, you know, _your date?_"

"Lena, you're the one who told me to ask Sera out," Paul reminds her, fighting the urge to close the remaining space between them and take her in his arms like he knows she wants him to, "Remember?"

"No, I did not tell you to ask her out," Lena corrects impatiently, "I told you to _text _her."

"Well what did you think would happen?" Paul wonders.

"I don't know," Lena claims, avoiding his brown-eyed gaze. She for damn sure didn't think she'd be stuck on an awkward triple-date with the two of them.

"If you didn't want me to take her out," Paul says, hooking a finger under her chin and gently turning her face in his direction, "Then you should have said so."

Lena crosses her arms defiantly, insisting, "That's the thing, Paul; I could honestly care less what you do. Text whoever you want. Take out whoever you want. _Kiss _whoever you want to!"

"Okay," Paul agrees, relieved to finally hear her say it, "Fine."

"Fine," Lena repeats firmly.

And then Paul swoops down and kisses her, his hand finding its way to the base of her neck, urging her closer rather than further away. Not that Lena needs any encouragement, because as soon as his lips touch hers she feels like her bones have turned to jell-o and she stumbles forward on weak legs, her eyes fluttering shut. She returns his kiss with reckless abandon, forgetting her surroundings. Both of her hands reach out by what feels like their own accord and snake around his neck as Paul walks her backwards into the wall. As Lena's back touches the wall, though, reality sets in, and her eyes snap open. She drops her hands, pressing them against Paul's t-shirt clad chest and turns her head to the side, effectively putting an end to their erratic smooching. She breathes heavily for a few seconds as she stares at the strange-patterned carpet on the floor and comes to terms with what just occurred between herself and the boy whose arms are currently wrapped around her waist, the boy who is not her boyfriend.

"You shouldn't have done that," Lena whispers, even though she knows it wasn't entirely his fault. Looking back on the words they exchanged, it almost seems like she was asking for him to kiss her, like she basically gave him permission. She regretfully removes Paul's hands from her waist and turns away from him.

Just then, Sera comes around the corner in search of Paul and stops in her tracks when she finds Lena walking away from her hot date, who is frowning at the ground as though it has done something to wound him. It is pretty obvious _something _just happened, as the tension in the hallway is palpable. Raising an eyebrow at her friend, Sera asks, "What's going on?"

"Nothing," Lena replies, brushing past Sera without a backward glance. She still feels a bit weak in the knees, but she manages to make it back to her seat inside the theater. Embry smiles at her before leaning close to her ear and filling her in on what she missed of the movie while she was in the bathroom. She thanks him, feeling the guilt of what she's just done settle in the pit of her stomach. She kissed Paul. Well, she let Paul kiss her, rather. Still, she didn't try and stop him, and that was wrong. It felt so...good though, and that makes her feel even worse. She and Embry just celebrated their 2-year anniversary three weeks ago, and she has betrayed him. _What am I going to do now? _

* * *

Author's Note: Please, please review! The ending of this chapter took me so long to finish, because I kept reading it and tweaking it until it felt like a moment that could actually happen between two people. I hope I've done Lena and Paul's first kiss justice, but I'd love to hear what you guys thought of it! I know not everyone is going to be happy about it, but as I said at the beginning of the chapter: things are complicated right now, and teenagers are impulsive. I hope you guys won't hate Lena for what she's done.

Also, I'd love to hear your suggestions as to what you'd like to see happen next! I always appreciate and consider your feedback when writing upcoming chapters! :)


	17. Chapter 17

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 17! Welcome, new followers, I'm happy to have you! Also, thanks to those of you who have added my story to your favorites list, it means a lot. This week has been busy, but so far I'm following my plan as this is my 2nd update this week! :)

To my Reviewers: Momsen-xxxx, jace4ever, Guest, TwineTard, Cindy, twilight85fan, Guest, &amp; Imprint obsessed - Thanks so much for your comments! I believe most of you were happy that Paul &amp; Lena _finally _kissed for the first time, and that makes me happy too! :) I really appreciate your feedback, and I try and incorporate your suggestions as I'm writing because I want you to enjoy reading this as much as I enjoy writing it. I know you guys want answers about Lena's mom, both about her diagnosis and her crappy attitude towards Lena, and I assure you that your questions will be answered very soon. I try to never leave unresolved issues when writing my stories, but some problems take longer to resolve than others, so stick with me.

* * *

**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**17\. Do You Have The Time To Listen To Me Whine?**

For the life of him, Paul can't concentrate on the movie he paid $7.50 to come see all the way out in Port Angeles, not that he's complaining. He hadn't been interested in seeing the movie in the first place, just wanted an excuse to spend more time with Lena. Yes, he is technically on a date with another girl, and Lena had come with her boyfriend, but to Paul those are minor details. It wasn't Embry who stole a kiss from Lena during the middle of the movie, was it? Nope, it was him, and even though she claimed it was a mistake, he can't stop thinking about it. Sure, he shouldn't have done it, but he had, and he doesn't regret it one bit. Lena's lips had tasted sweet, like milk chocolate, and he hadn't imagined her pulling him closer before she pushed him away, which means part of her wanted that kiss to happen. She is confused, and he can understand that. After all, she's been Call's girl for as long as he could remember, she hadn't even batted an eyelash at another guy once in the two years she's been in a relationship, so of course she'd need some time to figure out her feelings. Paul is willing to wait, but he hopes it won't take her too long to realize Embry isn't the right guy for her; he is, and he'll do whatever it takes to prove it.

Upon receiving a sharp elbow to the ribs from Sera, Paul notices the end credits are scrolling across the big screen, indicating the movie has ended. Damn, he missed nearly all of it. What movie had they even been watching? He can't recall. He stretches his legs out in front of him before getting to his feet and following after Sera and the rest of their group as they exit the theater and walk to the lobby.

"We should hit up the mall for some fro-yo!" Sera suggests enthusiastically as she slips in between Lena and Kim, looping her arms through theirs, "It doesn't close for another hour, so we have time."

Kim looks to Jared for an answer, who shrugs and tells her, "I don't mind. If you want to go, we'll go."

Kim beams brightly at Jared before replying to Sera, "Okay, sure. Let's do it."

"I...don't think I'm up for frozen yogurt," Lena says quietly, much to Paul's displeasure, "I'm really tired, and I have to get up early for work tomorrow."

"Boo! You suck," Sera quotes one of her all-time favorite movies: Mean Girls. Squeezing Kim's arm a little tighter, she states, "Well, you, me, Paul, and Jared will enjoy our frozen deliciousness while Embry takes his little old lady home to bed."

Rolling her eyes, Lena looks to Embry to see if he's disappointed. His smile reassures her that he's not upset, and she returns his smile weakly. Truth is, she's not tired one bit, but she does feel sick to her stomach, and she knows it's not from eating movie theater junk food. It's because she and Paul kissed and the guilt is eating away at her. She can't go to the mall and sit down at a table with Embry _and_ Paul, pretending that nothing out of the ordinary has happened tonight. She wishes she had a moment to pull Kim away and tell her what happened, so she can ask for her advice or a slap to the face or _something._ Unfortunately, with Sera present, there's no way she'll get that opportunity, and with her phone being at home, she can't even send Kim a secret text message.

"Yes, I know, I suck," Lena sighs, truly feeling like she deserves worse from Sera. She did kiss her date, after all, and if Sera knew about it she'd probably be getting her hair ripped out at the moment. "You guys have fun though."

"We will," Sera says confidently.

"Thanks for coming tonight," Kim tells her best friend, removing her arm from Sera's tight hold in order to give Lena a hug. As she does, she whispers in her ear, "I'll call you tomorrow morning, okay?"

Lena nods into Kim's shoulder, encouraging her, "Yeah, don't forget."

"Bye Lean-bean! See you on Monday." Sera gives Lena a hug as well, and then turns to send Paul a devilish smirk over her shoulder, only to be overlooked since he is staring so intently at Lena. Sera watches him while he watches her friend the entire time they are exiting the movie theater and going their separate ways. Paul doesn't take his eyes off Lena until she's gotten inside her boyfriend's car, and during that time Sera comes to the realization that she was wrong. Paul Lahote isn't into her at all; he likes _Lena._

**.**

The hour-long ride home to La Push is mostly silent because Embry is trying to let Lena rest, while Lena is busy working up the courage to tell Embry what happened back at the movie theater. Her heart feels heavy in her chest because every conversation she has in her head ends with Embry being hurt or angry at her. They've never had a fight over the course of their relationship, and they barely disagreed before they became a couple, so for her to have to break this news to him, knowing how much it will hurt him, is literally the hardest thing she's ever had to do. And she can't do it. No matter how hard she tries to open her mouth and simply start confessing, it's as if her tongue is super-glued to the roof of her mouth. She can't tell him.

When Embry pulls up in front of Lena's house, she unbuckles her seat belt and swivels towards him with a guilty expression on her face. "You know I love you, right?" Lena takes one of Embry's hands in her own.

"Of course," Embry replies, shooting her a crooked smile as he returns, "And I love you."

Lena draws in a deep breath and intends on spilling the beans, but what comes out of her mouth is, "I just wanted to make sure you knew how much, that's all. Because you're like my best friend, Em, and I don't know what I'd do without you."

Chuckling at his girl's odd behavior, he pulls her in for a hug, "Come here, crazy." He kisses her forehead. "I'm right here," He assures her, "I'm not going anywhere."

Lena nods, "Good." She wraps her arms around him tight and lays her head on his shoulder. _I should tell him now, _Lena thinks to herself, _I need to tell him. _"I'll call you tomorrow after I get out of work."

"Okay. Night babe," Embry says as Lena sits up, pecks him on the mouth, and scoots away from him, "Sweet dreams."

"You too. Drive safe," Lena cautions. She opens the car door and steps out onto the pavement. She walks part-way down the cement path that leads to her family's home before looking over her shoulder and waving to Embry. He always waits until she gets to her front door before continuing home himself. It's very sweet. And that doesn't make Lena feel any better about her inability to tell Embry the truth. Now she's keeping something from him - something big - and she's never done that before. She reaches for the doorknob with a shaky hand, holding it steady as she pulls her house key from her purse and unlocks the door. She quietly lets herself inside, even though it's only 9:30pm and her parents are likely awake still. She doesn't feel like talking.

Until she sees Cammie in the den, dipping potato chips in a bowl of chocolate ice cream and watching Bring It On, and she remembers the cheerleading team was announced today. She hadn't seen Cammie after school, so she never got a chance to ask her sister if she made it on the squad. She backtracks down the stairs and silently enters the den, taking a seat on the couch next to Cammie before the girl even notices her presence.

"Oh, jeez, Lena," Cammie gasps, "You scared me. I didn't hear you come in." Her throat is raspy and her eyes are red, a dead give-away that she's been crying.

"What's the matter, Cammie?" Lena asks, sliding closer to the younger teen and putting her arm around her shoulder. She questions gently, "Did you not make the team?"

"No, I did," Camille sobs out, clinging to her older sister dramatically, "But Quinn didn't, and she made me promise before the try-outs that if we both didn't make the team, then neither of us would do it. So I have to quit, or Quinn will hate me forever!"

Lena rubs Cammie's back silently for a minute, waiting for her to calm down. "Okay, well that's just silly. You two are best friends. Why would Quinn be angry with you for wanting to stay on the team when it's what you practiced so hard for? If cheerleading is going to make you happy, then Quinn should be happy for you. Can't you talk to her and explain how much you want this?"

"No," Camille sniffles, "I can't do that to Quinn. She's crushed she didn't make the team. She already blames me for it. I don't want to hurt her feelings any more. When I told her I wanted to try-out, she only agreed to do it because she didn't want to lose me to the cheerleaders. She thought I'd stop being her friend or something."

"You'd never do that," Lena points out.

"I know that, but Quinn doesn't." Cammie dips another chip into her half-melted chocolate ice cream. "I don't want to risk our friendship. It's not worth it." She looks down at the chocolate-covered chip in her hand and announces, "I don't want this. I have a headache. I want to go to bed."

Lena takes the chip and pops it into her mouth, savoring the salty-sweet combination. She also takes the remote control from the coffee table and powers off the television. "Voila. Go to bed." She takes the bag of chips and Camille's unfinished bowl of ice cream to the kitchen, dispensing both in their proper location. When she arrives back at the stairs, Cammie is only on the third stair. Lena follows her up, contemplating what her night is going to be like and concluding it's going to suck. "Wanna sleep in my room tonight?" Lena suggests to her sis when she reaches the top of the stairs.

Cammie jerks around in surprise, "Really?" She always used to bug Lena to let her sleep in her room, but she said no every time except for once. Lena never understood why Camille would want to sleep in her room when her own room was just down the hall. To Cammie, it was a sleepover with her big sister, and it was exciting and fun. She hasn't asked in what feels like a very long time.

"Yeah," Lena shrugs, acting nonchalant, "Why not?" In truth, she'll be relieved if her sister agrees, because she doesn't want to be left alone with her thoughts tonight. Maybe with Cammie around, she'll be able to get some sleep.

"Okay, sure," Camille says with a smile, "Lemme grab my pillow." She runs on tiptoe to her and Maya's shared bedroom to get her pillow from the top bunk.

Lena changes into her pj's while Cammie is gone, and when she returns and hops into Lena's bed, she ducks out of the room to brush her teeth. By the time she's back, Cammie has settled herself on the left side of the bed, closer to the wall. Lena leaves the door open a crack in case one of her parents decides to check on the girls and wonders where the heck Camille is when they don't find her in her own bed. She sits on the edge of the bed and flicks off the lamp on the nightstand, and then she climbs under the blankets and lays her head on her pillow.

"Lena..." Cammie whispers, "What's the matter with you? And don't say nothing, because you wouldn't have asked me to sleep in here if something wasn't wrong."

Lena turns over and looks at her wise younger sister by the light of the moon shining in through the window. When did she get so smart? "I don't know what's wrong with me, Cam. I just..." Lena trails off. As tempting as it is to tell Cammie what happened between her and Paul tonight, she can't do it. She believes her sister could keep the secret, but she doesn't want to ask her to do that. It wouldn't be right.

"Is it Mom?" The thirteen-year-old wonders, "Do you know what's wrong with her? I heard her throwing up after dinner again tonight. She denied it when I asked her, but I know she's sick."

Knowing that Camille, Cody, and Maya have been kept in the dark about their mom's doctor visit last Monday, Lena keeps her response brief. "It's probably just a virus. I don't know. But don't worry about Mom. She'd tell us if it were anything serious." At least, Lena hopes she would. Even knowing about the doctor appointment, Lena still doesn't have any more answers than the rest of her siblings.

"I can't help it," Cammie confesses quietly, "I am worried. What if she's really sick? What if she doesn't get better?"

"Sh," Lena hushes the younger girl, reaching out with one hand to smooth down her hair, like their mom used to do when they were little and not feeling well, "She will."

**.**

Early Saturday morning, when the sun is just peeking over the horizon, setting Lena's room aglow with light, the oldest Fawling sister rolls onto her back and stares up a the ceiling. She hadn't slept a wink. Her eyelids feel like sandpaper as she blinks. Stealing a jealous look at her younger sister, who has been sleeping soundly since 10pm last night, Lena sighs silently. What she wouldn't give to be Camille right now. She wonders if she'd made her confession to Embry last night if that would have helped her to sleep, but decides that it probably would not. If she'd told Embry what happened and they'd had a giant blow-out, or worse, if he'd broken up with her, then she would have spent the entire night crying and would probably feel even shittier than she does right now. Still, her stomach is queasy, her head is spinning, and her body is heavy with exhaustion. All she wants to do is get some sleep, but with work approaching in just over four hours, it is very unlikely that will happen.

She'd like to blame Paul for this, for her feeling the way she does; guilty, conflicted, indecisive, and even a bit jealous. But she can't blame him entirely, because her feelings are her own, and she isn't sure where he stands. Surely he must have had a reason for kissing her the way he did, but she's clueless what that reason could be, and she did spend _hours _thinking it over when she was supposed to be sleeping. She knows Paul can be impulsive, that he rarely takes things seriously, and he always does exactly what he wants to, but that still doesn't explain why he'd kiss her. He knows she has a boyfriend. It's not like he _likes her _or anything, because that's...impossible. And she doesn't believe he did it to cause trouble, either, so what option does that leave her with? Maybe he was temporarily insane? Maybe _she's _temporarily insane?

Lena folds her hands into fists and rubs them over her tired eyes. She knows what she has to do. She has to talk to Paul. She's not sure she's ready, though.

Dragging her groggy ass out of bed, Lena creeps out of her room and down the stairs in search of her father. She finds him easily enough, as he's sitting in his chair in the den with a mug of coffee in hand, the TV set to the local news station and the volume turned down as low as it can go without being muted. He lifts his mug to his lips and takes a sip before he realizes she's hovering in the doorway.

"Hey, Lena-bird," He greets quietly, motioning for her to take a seat across from him on the couch, "You're up early."

"Been up all night, actually," Lena corrects as she follows his direction and perches on the edge of the couch. "I couldn't sleep."

"Is something the matter?" Simon asks, setting his coffee down on the table and looking at his eldest daughter with concern-filled brown eyes.

"No," Lena denies with a shake of her head. "Well...kind of. I'm not really feeling very well." She's never done this before; faked being sick to get out of school or work, but she doesn't want to face the world today, so she's giving it a go.

"Oh," Simon says sympathetically, "I'm sorry, hon. Do you think maybe you should stay home today? If you're coming down with something, you should rest. We wouldn't want you missing school when you're only three weeks in."

It was easier than she thought it'd be, convincing her father to give her the day off. "Are you sure? Aunt Shayna can't handle the store with only Leah there."

"I'll give your Aunt Tanaya a call," Her dad assures her, "And see if River is available for a few hours today. You should go back up to bed and try and get some rest. I hope you feel better."

"Okay," Lena quietly agrees, "Thanks Dad."

She feels a little rotten for lying to her dad about her health, but she really could use the rest. Yawning widely as she climbs the stairs, Lena heads back into her bedroom. She pulls the curtains closed to block out the sunlight, and flops onto her bed. Then, she sits back up and looks around the room for her cell phone, which she'd forgotten about. Seeing it on her dresser, she gets up once more to move it closer to her, on the night stand, and then settles into bed to hopefully get some sleep. Resolving that she'll talk to Kim once she wakes up, and then seek out Paul to get their shit straightened out, she feels a little bit better. Once she and Paul get on the same page, she'll be able to talk to Embry, and hopefully all will work itself out. With that in mind, Lena is able to shut her eyes and fall into a deep, much-needed sleep.

When Lena wakes up hours later, it is half-past one in the afternoon, her bed is now empty, and she has three missed calls: two from Kim and one from Sera. She also has two unread text messages from Kim, both from last night. The first is Kim's warning text that Sera and Paul were joining their double-date, and the second is from much later on, when Jared has just dropped her off at home and she's gushing about how great her time spent with him was, and how he's such a perfect gentleman. He even walked her to her front door and kissed her on the cheek! Lena grins happily for her friend, but then she sobers up when she remembers the awful thing she did last night. Deciding to ignore Sera's call for now, she dials Kim's number and puts the phone to her ear.

"Hey," Kim picks up on the third ring, her voice still giddy with leftover excitement from the previous evening's event, "What's up? I didn't think I'd hear from you until tonight, since you didn't pick up earlier."

"Sorry, I was sleeping," Lena informs her, "I just woke up."

"No work today?" Kim asks, highly surprised as Lena hasn't had a Saturday off in over a year.

"Nope," Lena replies, "Dad gave me a sick day."

"Oh no, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, really," Lena says, "Well, nothing contagious, at least. I just couldn't sleep last night, and I felt really crappy."

Kim squeals suddenly and then bursts into laughter, telling her best friend, "Hang on, Lena. Oh my God! Zach! Get over here!" She holds the phone away from her as she shouts, "Why is Zazu out of his cage?!"

"You found him!" Lena can hear Zach yell, "Thanks, Kim. I've been looking all over for him!"

"Yeah, well, I almost stepped on him," Kim chides, "You have to be more careful." Once Zach has scooped up his tan and white hamster, Kim shoos him from her room and resumes her phone conversation. "Sorry, Lena. Zach's hamster escaped from his cage, _again. _What were you saying?"

Lena releases the lip she's been chewing on as she claims, "I need to talk to you. Like, in person. Something happened, and I...I don't know what to do. I need you."

"Okay," Kim agrees without hesitation, "Want me to come over?"

"Yeah." Lena realizes that her mom is still home, though, and she's supposed to be sick, so having a friend over might not be the best idea. "Actually...I don't know. I'm technically home sick today, so my mom might get mad if I have you over when I told my dad I was feeling too shitty to go to work."

"Well, I'll bring you some chicken noodle soup," Kim solves the problem easily, "Okay? Be there in about thirty minutes?"

"All right. See you soon."

Lena hangs up and emerges from her bedroom to take a quick shower. She is surprised when she gets out that she hasn't heard any signs of life since she left her bedroom. After dressing casual in jeans and a plain red t-shirt, Lena begins searching the house for her siblings. It seems everyone has gone out for the day. In the kitchen, she finds a note on the counter that tells her Forrest is over Seth's, and the rest of the family has gone to visit with Simon's parents, who live on the opposite side of the reservation. According to the note, they left just before she woke up and won't be home until after dinner. She's got the whole house to herself! It isn't very often that happens.

Opening up the fridge, Lena debates what to eat for lunch, since her stomach has let out a rather loud grumble of hunger. She hadn't exactly eaten dinner last night, unless nachos and chocolate covered peanuts count, and she skipped breakfast this morning. She's overdue for a meal. She decides on grilled cheese, and gets the butter and american cheese from the fridge. She sets the pan on the stove to heat up while she butters the bread, and then sets it in the pan to fry up while she layers on the cheese. Kim knocks on the front door right as she's flipping her sandwich in the pan.

Lena runs to the door, unlocks it, and allows Kim to come inside. Kim has an insulated container filled with chicken noodle soup in her hands, which she gives over to Lena with a smile, "Here. Although it doesn't look like anyone is home."

"I know, sorry," Lena replies, leading the way back to the kitchen to remove her grilled cheese from the heat, "I didn't realize my whole family went out for the day until after I got off the phone with you. Thanks for coming over though, and for the soup."

"No problem," Kim replies.

"Want a grilled cheese?" Lena offers.

Kim shakes her head, "Nah, that's okay. I already ate."

Lena carries the soup and her grilled cheese sandwich to the dining room and takes a seat at the table. Kim sits across from her, looking to her best friend expectantly. Lena avoids her gaze momentarily and takes a bite of her lunch. She chews and swallows, determining that her guilt is causing the food to taste like dirt. She sighs as she places the sandwich back on the plate, announcing, "I really don't know what's wrong with me."

"Well, what happened?" Kim queries, "Something must have happened for you to feel like this, right?"

"Yeah, I just..." Lena shrugs, "don't really know where to start."

Kim smiles encouragingly and suggests, "Just start anywhere."

"Okay," Lena nods, taking a breath and preparing herself before she begins, "I guess it all started about a month or two ago? After Paul came home from visiting his mom, he was acting really strange. He was mad all the time, and then he took off for like a week, and his dad was really worried, and didn't where he was. When he finally showed up, it was really weird. I saw him from my bedroom window, sneaking into his house, right? It was like midnight and he was totally nude. I mean, not that that's the point, but it was weird. I didn't see him face-to-face until a week later, when he came into work. I wanted to ask him what happened to him, but for some reason when I saw him...I didn't. I can't explain it, Kim. I just feel like something changed him. Paul is...different now." Lena looks to Kim nervously, wondering what her best friend is thinking, but the other brunette remains silent. "After that day, he avoided me for over a week, and it really hurt my feelings. I-I couldn't stop thinking about what I'd done to make him mad at me, even though I knew I hadn't done anything. So, I confronted him about being such a dick to me, and he literally had no explanation for his behavior. It was like he wanted me to forgive him and forget about it, but he couldn't tell me why he acted the way he did. Maybe I shouldn't have forgiven him so easily, but I did, and I thought things went back to normal. By the time school started, I just wanted all the weirdness to go away, you know?" Kim nods, but still doesn't speak. "Then, of course, he walked in on me in his bathroom and saw me naked, which didn't help. I literally wanted to die, it was so embarrassing. But even then he surprised me. He didn't tell anyone. He didn't make fun of me, or say anything crude. He seemed more concerned about me avoiding him after, and wouldn't leave me alone. It was so...not like Paul."

"He does seem different this year," Kim finally comments.

"Yeah," Lena confirms, grateful for Kim's opinion, "He does, right? So, last week, my parents had to go into Forks early in the morning, and needed me to get the kids on their bus. I had to miss mine, so the night before, I asked Paul for a ride to school. Then, that night, I had the weirdest dream. Paul was driving me to school in his truck, and he passed the school for some reason, and told me he was going to answer all the questions that I have for him. It felt so real, Kim. I honestly didn't know I was dreaming until I woke up. He said all these things that don't make sense, like how I can't look him in the eyes anymore without blushing, and that I won't be able to resist him for long, and that he wants the same thing that I do...And he kissed me. On the neck. It was totally unexpected, and when I woke up I was freaking out. Like, why would I have a dream about Paul kissing me? It didn't make sense."

"Well, it was only a dream," Kim points out, "It's not like it really happened."

Lena closes her eyes momentarily and wishes that were true. Deciding that she's told far too much of the story to quit now, she continues, "I haven't been able to stop thinking about it, though. That dream? It's stuck in my brain and I'm so confused. Every time I see Paul now, I think about the things he said and the way he kissed me, and how good it felt. God, this is so messed up! I don't know how I got here. I don't know how this happened. But...I really messed up, Kim."

"What do you mean?"

Lena gulps, her throat feeling tight, and her voice coming out hoarse, "I thought if I told him to return Sera's texts, and if they started hanging out, that I'd feel better, and all of this weirdness would go away. Because I really didn't know until last night how much I didn't want him to be with her. I know it's not right. I know I shouldn't care what he does. But I do, and I - Oh, this is all my fault. I've been up all night thinking about it. My stomach is in knots, and I feel so guilty." Her voice cracks and she squeezes her eyes shut as they blur with tears. "During the movie last night...when I saw Sera kissing Paul, I felt sick to my stomach, so I left and went to the bathroom. And when I came out, Paul was there, like he knew." She opens her eyes and looks across the table at Kim as a lone tear slides down her cheek. She whispers, "And he kissed me. And I kissed him back. But then I pushed him away and I told him he shouldn't have done it. But it happened, and now I don't know what to do. I couldn't tell Em. I wanted to, but I was so scared. I don't want him to hate me." She covers her face with her hands and lets the tears flow freely.

Kim's chair scrapes against the linoleum floor as she gets to her feet and crosses the room to Lena's side. She wraps her arms around her and holds her while she cries. She's never seen Lena this upset before, and at first she doesn't know what to say. When she came over to talk, she had no idea what the conversation would be about. She definitely hadn't guessed it would lead to Lena telling her that she and Paul _kissed. _It's almost too crazy to believe. But then Kim remembers the way Paul looked at Lena on the first day of school, like she was the only person in the hallway even though it was crowded with students and Sera in particular was vying for his attention. Even last night, after Lena and Embry left, Paul was quieter than usual, and she didn't see him make a pass at Sera once. She also remembers how defensive Lena got when she suggested to her that it would bother her if Paul took Sera out. Lena had denied it, and she'd believed her, but now Kim can see how confused Lena really is. At the time, she didn't want to admit she was conflicted, but now she has no choice but to face the truth, and that truth is she might just have feelings for Paul. What Paul feels for Lena is another story altogether. Kim has no idea what's going on in that boy's head, and she only hopes he's not toying with her best friend as part of some sick, twisted game of his.

"No wonder you didn't want to get frozen yogurt with us," Kim jokes, hoping to lighten the mood. "I can't believe you've been feeling like this for weeks and you didn't tell me. But, you have to know, Lee, that Embry could _never _hate you. He loves you way too much, and not just because you're his girlfriend, but because you're _you._ You two have been close since birth, and you will always be close, no matter what your relationship status is. Embry will always care about you. You will always be an important person in his life."

"I totally betrayed his trust," Lena says in a monotone voice, feeling hollow inside, "I know how much he loves me, and that should have been enough, but it wasn't. I never wanted to hurt him. I don't know what I was thinking. This is going to hurt him, though. It's the worst thing I've ever done. How could he still love me after this?"

Kim hunkers down in the chair next to Lena, giving her two cents, "I guess you have to look at it from his point-of-view to really know how he's going to feel. How would _you _feel if Embry told you that...he kissed another girl, and he wasn't sure how he felt anymore?"

"What?" Lena's expression is a mixture between panicked and horrified, "It would kill me. It would break my heart. I've been in love with him for as long as I've know what love was. We just celebrated our two-year anniversary, Kim. We're supposed to get married one day. How could he not know how he feels? Oh my God, how can I not know how I feel about him? I've loved him forever. What's so confusing about that?"

Kim shakes her head, feeling discouraged. She hadn't meant for her words to upset Lena even further. She was trying to help. Apparently putting Lena in Embry's shoes was the wrong way to do that. "Feelings change," Kim tells Lena regretfully, "and sometimes there's nothing you can do about that."

"No," Lena says firmly, "No. They don't just change like that. Not for no reason. I have to figure this out." She wipes any traces of tears from her cheeks and states with determination, "I have to talk to Paul."

* * *

Author's Note: Woo-hoo, I'm so proud! I finished this chapter in two days. That means, if you guys are lucky, you will be getting a third update this week, possibly by Friday :) I know there wasn't much Paul in this chapter, and literally no Paul &amp; Lena interactions, but next chapter most certainly will.

Please Review! I always appreciate any and all feedback I receive. It's always awesome to hear your thoughts and suggestions :)


	18. Chapter 18

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 18! This chapter turned out to be longer than I anticipated, which is why I didn't post it sooner, but I expect the next chapter will be up in just a few days :) Thanks for following/favoriting, I so appreciate your support!

To my Reviewers: TwineTard, Imprint obsessed, Robyn. Girl. Wonder. 93, A reader, Guest, jace4ever, &amp; Twihard - Thanks so much for your kind comments! I really appreciate it :) You're welcome for the quick update last time, I'm glad you enjoyed. I figured it was about time Lena told somebody how confused she was, and who better to tell than her best friend Kim? I'm happy most of you seem to agree it was good for Lena to talk to Kim. **TwineTard: **Glad you noticed the parallels between those two character issues, I was hoping someone would pick up on that :) Lena didn't realize she was giving advice to her little sister that she kind of needed to hear herself.

* * *

**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**18\. So This Is How It Goes**

It was on the ride home from the movies, right around the time the first signs for La Push appeared on the side of the road, that Sera claimed Paul couldn't take her to her house because her parents weren't expecting her until the following morning. Paul asked her what exactly she meant by that, and she replied that she told her parents earlier she wouldn't be coming home tonight. When Paul raised an eyebrow at her in surprise and confusion, Sera tried to ignore the pang of rejection she felt and told him she was planning on sleeping at River's, but River cancelled. Then she proceeded to lie by stating she didn't want to walk in on her parents getting freaky in the kitchen, like they were the last time she came home unexpectedly so couldn't she just stay with him? The last thing Paul wanted to do was allow Sera to spend the night at his house, but after taking her out on a date and ignoring her because he was too enamored by her friend to pretend to be interested in her, he felt like maybe he owed her a little. He decided it wouldn't hurt to let her stay over; he'd give her his bed and sleep on the couch for the night. He was due to meet up with Sam to take over patrol for a few hours anyways, and he wouldn't be getting to bed until much, much later. This whole 'patrol' idea came to Sam recently, at the suggestion of the elders, so they hadn't really worked out a schedule yet. There were only three of them, after all, and who knew how many Cold Ones roaming the nearby area, aside from the ones they already knew of. It was a daunting task, protecting their tribe from the threat of vampires, but Paul was up for the challenge.

It was after he put clean sheets on his bed, since he couldn't remember when the last time he'd done that was, and turned around to see Sera starting to undress in front of him that Paul realized he made a mistake when he agreed Sera could spend the night. It just wasn't his night, he kept doing all the wrong things. He told her to stop. He said he was sorry but he couldn't sleep with her, and then told her he'd be on the couch if she needed anything. He left the room then, closing the door behind him. If Sera ever came out of the room looking for him, Paul wasn't aware of it, because he spent the next four hours in wolf form. When he got home, it was after 3am, and he fell asleep the moment his body hit the sofa.

Paul woke up at quarter to two in the afternoon on Saturday, and when he opened his eyes the first thing he saw was Sera standing over his shirtless body, wearing only a towel. He sat up quickly, demanding to know, "What are you still doing here?"

Sera scoffed, "Well, I wasn't going to walk home, was I? Your dad offered me a ride, but...no offense, I don't really know him, so I told him I'd wake you. It's, like, really late, you know. I was just about to take a shower, if that's all right."

Since she was already in the towel, Paul gestured down the hall towards the bathroom and said, "Go right ahead."

As she sashayed away from him, Sera looked over her shoulder, and since Paul was watching her leave the room, she suggested, "You can join me, if you want to."

"Are you serious?" Paul frowned, not understanding why she couldn't just take a hint. "I'm not going to do that, Sera. I already told you, I can't sleep with you. It's not gonna happen. I'm sorry for misleading you, if that's how you feel, but I..."

"Have feelings for someone else?" Sera filled in, turning to face Paul completely. She had been waiting for him to admit to it. She was surprised he actually refused her offer for sex _twice _though. She figured most guys, especially a guy like Paul Lahote, wouldn't have the will-power to turn down a pretty girl who wanted nothing more than to fuck him. It sucked, being rejected, but Sera was a tough girl and she could take it. Besides, she and Paul hadn't been dating, and she wasn't in love with him, so it was not the end of the world.

Paul was momentarily dumbfounded; how had she figured it out? "I...guess you could say that," Paul finally confirmed, his voice tight and uncomfortable.

Sera nodded, not pressing him for further details. "I'm going to take a shower now. Then will you bring me home?"

"Of course," Paul agreed, glad she hadn't asked him who he'd rather be with if not her.

When Sera went into the bathroom and turned on the water, Paul got up from the couch and walked into his room to get dressed. He glanced out his bedroom window, looking to the house next door, and wondered what Lena was doing. He remembered it was after 2pm on a Saturday, though, so she wasn't even home, she was working. Paul recalled once more how it felt to kiss her for the first time - well, aside from that kiss when they were kids, which he didn't think even counted - and how she'd wrapped her arms around his neck and leaned into him. It only lasted for the briefest of moments, but he couldn't stop replaying it in his mind over and over again. He wished it hadn't ended with her pushing him away and telling him he shouldn't have.

Paul headed back to the front of his house, debating if he had time to make something to eat before Sera would be ready to go, since he was famished. On the way to the kitchen, he saw Kim Conweller approach the yellow Fawling house, and his interest was piqued. There weren't either of the family's two cars parked in the drive, but Kim was let inside right away. Could Lena be at home?

Deciding to find out, Paul did the only thing he could to get a definite answer: he made sure the water was still running in the bathroom, and went out back to shift into his wolf. His shape-shifting ability gave him better hearing, even in human form, but not good enough to hear a conversation next door from inside his house. Rather than getting caught creeping around Lena's yard, he went into the woods and listened for her voice. He wasn't intending on eavesdropping after learning she was home, but when he heard Lena talking to Kim about him, he couldn't walk away. He heard everything...

**.**

After confiding in Kim Saturday afternoon, Lena was relieved to find she actually felt a little bit better. She was able to finish her lunch, and ask Kim to give her more details about her ride home with Jared the previous night. Not only did he walk her to her door and give her a sweet peck on the cheek, but apparently he asked her out on another date - dinner, next Friday, just the two of them - and Kim said yes. It was a nice distraction from Lena's current situation, but it could only last so long. When Lena was washing the dishes she used for her meal, Kim standing beside her with the towel to help dry them off, she glanced out the window and saw something rather shocking; Sera had just come out of the Lahote's house, Paul right behind her, and they both walked to his truck, got inside, and took off. Lena turned off the water and looked to Kim with an indiscernible expression on her face. Had she really been up all night worrying about a kiss that clearly meant nothing to the initiator himself? If she'd known Paul was only playing with her, she would have told Embry right away what happened and saved herself some guilt!

"I am such an idiot," Lena had announced after watching Paul's truck disappear down the road.

Kim had to admit, she was just as confused, "That...doesn't make sense. Lena, he didn't seem interested in her at all last night. Maybe it's not what it looks like."

"Oh, it's definitely what it looks like," Lena decided, remembering how easily Paul seduced Leah last month, and knowing how much Sera already wanted him; the only possible explanation for Sera coming out of Paul's house at 3pm the afternoon after their date is that she spent the night, and if she spent the night then they definitely hooked up. "And you know what? It doesn't matter. I don't know what I was thinking. I guess he hasn't really changed that much at all."

With a frown on her face, Kim had asked, "Are you still going to talk to him though?"

"No way," Lena shook her head firmly, "What's the point? I'm just going to talk to Embry. He's the one who deserves an explanation. I don't want to keep a secret like this from him. I'm going to tell him what happened last night, and explain that it was all a big mistake. It didn't mean anything." Not to Paul, at least. "Hopefully he'll be able to forgive me."

"But, Lena," Kim tried to point out, "What about how confused you're feeling? Do you really think that's going to go way without having a conversation with Paul?"

"What is there to say?" Lena said in a deflated tone, "He kissed me and then he slept with Sera. I don't think there's anything to talk about. I'm over it. I was confused, and now I'm not. I wish I could forget it ever happened."

Kim stayed for another hour, trying her best to convince Lena she should give Paul the benefit of the doubt and at least talk to him before writing him off, but her efforts were futile; Lena refused to even consider Paul could have a reasonable explanation for her, and she was ready to beg Embry's forgiveness and move on. Kim could tell Lena was more upset than she let on, but she didn't know what else she could say to make her feel better. If Lena couldn't face her feelings, Kim wasn't going to force her to. Maybe it was best for her to simply ignore them until they went away?

When Kim went home, Lena picked up her cell and called Embry, who was hanging out with Jacob and Quil. "Hey," Lena had said, trying to keep the wavering out of her voice, "Can you meet me at your house? I need to talk to you."

"Now?" Embry had seemed surprised, which was understandable given that he assumed she had been at work all day, "Aren't you working?"

"No," Lena explained, "My dad gave me the day off. Listen, it's really important. Can you please meet me?"

"Yeah, of course," Embry said sincerely, "I'll see you in twenty minutes, okay?"

"Okay."

**.**

Somehow, Lena arrives at Embry's first, and since Tiffany isn't home, she takes a seat on the stairs outside to wait. It isn't long before she can see Embry walking up the street, approaching the house. She wipes her sweaty palms on her jeans and wills herself to relax and stop being so nervous. She wants to be calm and collected, not jumpy and guilty. How is Embry supposed to believe she's sorry and the kiss between her and Paul meant nothing if she doesn't even believe it herself?

Embry smiles nervously when he sees Lena sitting on his front stairs, looking like she's holding her breath. "Hey...Everything okay?"

At first, Lena starts to nod, but then she shakes her head. "No," She admits, "Not really."

"Do you want to come inside?" Embry asks, suddenly feeling very apprehensive about the upcoming conversation. It's obviously not good news.

"Um," Lena stands up unsurely and shrugs, "If you want."

"Okay?" Embry takes the lead and unlocks the front door, letting Lena follow him inside. He sits down on the couch and waits for Lena to join him. She sits beside him, but the space she leaves between them is absurd. "You're freaking me out a little, Lena," He says with a short laugh.

"I'm sorry," Lena replies. She already decided on the walk over that she is going to tell it to him quick and hope that, much like a band-aid, it will only sting for a second. She doesn't want to hurt him any more than she has to. "I don't really know how to say this, so I'm just going to spit it out. Something happened last night, and I should have told you then, but I was really worried you'd be mad at me, so I didn't, but then I couldn't sleep last night and -" She realizes she's rambling and pauses, collecting her thoughts. She scoots a few inches closer to her boyfriend as she tells him, "At the movies, Paul sort of...kissed me."

Embry shifts uncomfortably upon hearing the news, blinking a few times in confusion before asking, "What?"

"I went to the bathroom," Lena babbles on, "And when I came out, Paul was there, and I don't really know why he did it, but he just kissed me. And then I told him he shouldn't have done it and went back inside the theater. I was so surprised, I didn't know what to do. I haven't talked to him since then, and I know this is really fucked up, Embry, but I'm really sorry. It didn't mean anything. I swear." She swallows the lump in her throat, urging herself not to cry. She doesn't want to cry about this in front of Embry. It wouldn't be fair, especially if he tried to comfort her, because that's what he would do. He's too nice not to. And she doesn't deserve it, because even her confession has a lie by omission. She might not know the exact reason Paul kissed her, but she knows that kiss wasn't one-sided; Paul initiated and she kissed him back. She simply came to her senses first. Paul clearly came to his later, like when he chose to have sex with her friend, who he said he only asked out because Lena told him to. She still can't believe she fell for a stupid line like that. How stupid is she?

"I don't get it," Embry says slowly, "He kissed you out of nowhere, for no reason?" He starts to think about why Paul would do something so idiotic, and then he starts to guess out loud, "Is this because he saw you naked? What, does he think now that he saw it, he can have it? He's ridiculous. Has he been hitting on you? You should have told me."

Lena frowns at Embry's calm behavior. She asks, "Aren't you mad?"

"Hell yeah I'm mad," Embry assures his girl, "At that jackass, not you. What the fuck does he think he's going to do? Steal my girlfriend? I can't believe him. I was actually nice to the guy, and he's probably been plotting a way into your panties all friggin' summer! I should have known."

"No, how could you? I-I don't think it's like that at all," Lena says, still confused as to why Embry isn't mad at her, "Actually, it's definitely not like that. He hasn't been hitting on me. He's _never _hit on me. And I'm pretty sure he hooked up with Sera last night, and he hooked up with a different girl last month, and probably a different one the month before that. This wasn't pre-planned. It was most likely some spur of the moment impulse that he couldn't deny because he doesn't know how, and he's used to getting what he wants."

"Well he's not getting you," Embry insists, wishing that Paul were here so he could punch him in the face a few times. He's never been a violent person, but hearing that Paul stole a kiss from his girl makes him want to hit something, _hard._

"Why would you even say that? Of course he's not," Lena assures him. "You're not going to do something stupid, are you?" Not that she doesn't believe in Embry or anything, but...Paul looks like he could knock Embry out with one punch and Lena doesn't want to see Embry get hurt because of her dumb mistake.

"No," Embry sighs, resigning himself to the fact that he couldn't win a fight against Paul, "I'm not. But I don't want you hanging out with him anymore. Clearly he has a fascination with you, and he can't be trusted."

For a moment, Lena doesn't know what to say. She supposes she should have expected this. If Embry were to forgive her then obviously he wouldn't want her hanging around Paul. It's still surprising to hear, though. This means no more showering next door, e_ver_, no more asking for rides, no talking between classes at their lockers or in the four classes they share, and no more chances for another mistake to occur. It's the right thing to do, but Lena still doesn't know how she's going to pull it off. Maybe if she agrees to the terms, this whole mess will be forgotten in a few weeks and everything will go back to normal.

"Okay," Lena nods, her voice much steadier than she feels on the inside, "I won't."

Embry holds his hand out for her to take and requests, "Come here." Lena takes his hand without hesitation and he pulls her closer to him, right up to his side, where he tucks her under his arm. He wants to ask her if she's positive she felt nothing when Paul kissed her, but he doesn't want her to think he doesn't trust her, and he's a little scared to know the answer. He can forgive her for this if he's sure it was all Paul's doing, but he's not sure if he can forgive so easily if that kiss means something to his girlfriend. How can he compete with a guy like Paul Lahote? He's gotten every girl he ever wanted since the start of high school, when he stopped growing taller and started packing on the muscle. The only girl Embry has ever wanted is Lena, and now she's somehow appeared on Paul's radar and he feels like it's only a matter of time before she's lost to him.

**.**

Since clearing the air with Embry, Lena has begun to feel immensely better. The guilt she'd been carrying around all but vanished. Still...something feels a bit _off. _She can't pinpoint it, but it's almost like she's got unfinished business to take care of. Could it be that conversation with Paul she never had? Or simply pent-up anger from discovering Paul hooked up with Sera after kissing her? Either way, she has to find a way to forget about all of it and move on. It's the only way ensure her relationship with Embry isn't ruined over this unfortunate incident.

"Lena!" Maya calls up the stairs, "Forrest! Dinner's ready!"

Lena closes her history book, which she hadn't actually been reading anyways, and hops off her bed to her feet. She steps out into the hallway at the same time as her brother, who playfully nudges her out of his way so he can get downstairs first. Lena simply rolls her eyes, not in the mood to race since she's not even that hungry. Besides, Mom made shepherd's pie, Forrest's favorite, so she knows why he's in such a hurry. Even at her slower pace, Lena arrives at the dinner table only moments after Forrest takes his usual seat beside Cody. Lena slides into her seat across from Forrest and next to Cammie, who is sandwiched between her older sister and younger sister.

"Smells good, Mom," Forrest comments after Simon takes the first serving and passes the serving spoon to his eldest son. Forrest scoops a giant helping of shepherd's pie onto his plate, and grabs himself two dinner rolls, which he thoroughly butters.

"Thank you," Winona replies to her eldest son. She hasn't felt a bit queasy since this morning, and is looking forward to this meal, since she's had a hard time keeping much of anything down the past few weeks. Hopefully tonight, she'll be able to digest her dinner.

Lena watches Forrest eat in amusement as the serving spoon is passed clockwise around the table and reaches her last. She's never seen Forrest have such a large appetite. It reminds her of Embry's recent change in appetite. Perhaps there's something in the water causing the boys to feel as if their stomachs are bottomless pits? Or maybe she simply never realized how much food a teenage boy could consume in one sitting before now. Either way, Lena's appetite doesn't increase watching her brother inhale his food like a ravenous animal. She serves herself a small mound of the mashed potatoes, corn, and beef pie, skipping the roll.

"Maya, what are you doing?" Cammie suddenly asks the youngest Fawling child, and all eyes turn towards her.

The picky girl is using her fork to separate her mashed potatoes from her corn and her corn from the beef and gravy. "What?" Maya states indignantly, "I don't like when my food is touching!" Once everything is in its own individual pile, she announces, "There. Much better." Then she takes a bite of her potatoes.

Cammie snorts, "You're weird."

Lena smirks and informs Camille, "You used to do the same thing."

"I did not," Cammie denies with a shake of her head, her black ponytail swinging behind her head.

"You did," Simon and Winona chime in at the same time, and everyone laughs; all except for Camille.

When it seems like the kids have finished their food, for the most part, Simon clears his throat and announces in a deep voice, "Before anyone leaves the table, there's something your mother and I would like to talk to you about."

Lena places her fork down, completely lacking in appetite now that her father has confirmed her worst suspicions: her parents were indeed waiting until family dinner to drop the big news on them. She leans back in her chair so she can look down the table towards her mother, and she is nervous when she can't read her mom's expression. What kind of news are she and her siblings about to receive?

Seeming to know where the conversation is headed, Camille anxiously asks, "Is this about Mom being sick lately? Oh God, are you really sick? What's wrong with you?"

"Calm down, sweetheart," Simon suggests, "Listen to your mother."

Winona turns her dark eyes in Camille's direction as she speaks, "I'm sorry for worrying you. If I'd known how anxious this was making you, I would have reassured you sooner that I'm all right." She then moves her eyes to her two youngest children, "I'm not sick. But Dad took me to the doctor last week, and we were given some...surprising results." She smiles sort of sheepishly as she confirms what Lena suspected all along, "I'm going to have a baby."

Maya gasps dramatically, "Really?"

Cammie sighs in relief, "Thank goodness you're not dying dying of cancer!"

"No, no," Winona assures her, "I'm not dying, Camille. The reason I've been so sick is because of morning sickness. I've been having it all day, and it's been hard to hide from you kids. Your father and I wanted to wait another couple of weeks before telling you the news, since I'm only ten weeks along. Ideally, we wanted to wait until after twelve weeks, so I'd be out of the first trimester, so for now, please keep this quiet. We'll make the announcement to the rest of our family and friends in a few weeks. If everything goes as planned, we will have a new baby in the family around April ninth."

"I'm going to be a big sister!" Maya squeals in excitement.

"Oh man," Cody groans, not even trying to hide his disappointment, "Not again."

"You don't even remember when Mom had Maya," Forrest points out, "You were a baby."

"Well I know if there are any more girls in this house," Cody warns, "I'm moving in with Grandma and Grandpa."

Lena giggles in spite of herself. She hadn't wanted to show any reaction, but Cody's honest opinion was just too cute. She understands how he feels. She's heard this announcement four other times already, although much like Cody she was only a baby herself when Forrest was born, not even a year old. And when Camille was born, she was three. It was only when Cody was born that Lena truly remembers comprehending that she'd be a big sister again, and she was really excited, like Maya is now. She was even excited when Mom and Dad announced Maya's impending arrival. "And if it's a boy?" Lena questions her youngest brother.

Cody frowns thoughtfully before mumbling in a begrudged tone, "I guess that'd be okay."

Forrest laughs, "I'm with you, Code." To their parents, he says, "Congrats, but...you do know this house is a little small for six kids..." He shrugs disarmingly, "Just saying. Not trying to cause any problems or anything. It'd be nice to get a little privacy every now and again."

_No kidding, _Lena mentally agrees with her brother, _This house is too small for five kids, let alone six. _Even with her own bedroom, Lena can understand Forrest's wish for more privacy. The house is simply too crowded.

"I can tell from the look on your face that you agree, Lena," Winona states disapprovingly.

Lena widens her eyes innocently, "I haven't said a word, Mom."

"Well," Winona prompts, "Why don't you tell me what you think?"

"I think..." Lena says slowly, "I think it doesn't matter what I think." She didn't mean to say that, but she can't exactly take it back now.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

Lena shakes her head, "Nothing. I don't know what you want me to say. You're having another baby. You're not asking us how we'd feel if you and dad decided to have another baby; it's already happening. I'm not going to tell you that I'm disappointed, but I'm not overjoyed either. May I please be excused?" She avoids her mom's unwavering gaze and instead looks to her father, hoping he'll let her off the hook.

Simon opens his mouth to reply, but Winona beats him to the punch, "I don't think so, young lady. I don't appreciate your attitude. I expected more from you."

"Well, I'm sorry," Lena states, although her tone indicates otherwise. Why is it that Forrest can get away with telling their parents the house isn't big enough for a new baby, but she can't even excuse herself before saying something offensive? She's so sick and tired of the unfairness!

"You need to set a better example for your siblings," Winona says sternly, "Have some respect. You do realize that responsibilities only increase with age, don't you? You don't get to slack off simply because you feel you're entitled to something."

Lena's jaw drops open and before she realizes it's a mistake, she is arguing back, "Are you kidding me?!" Her chair scrapes across the floor as she gets to her feet, "I _never _slack off! I take on more responsibility than anyone else around here. I do most of the chores, I work at the Market _five days a week, _I spend the rest of my free time doing homework or watching _your _kids, and you don't even care! You never say thank you or anything! It's never good enough, is it?" She picks up her drinking glass and her dinner plate, turning towards her father as she makes her way past him on the way to the kitchen. "Thanks a lot for your support, Dad," She tells him sarcastically.

The rest of the Fawling children look on in silent awe as their sister stomps out of the dining room, their mother hot on her heels. They've never seen Lena so angry, and they are shocked that she'd go off on their mom like that. She's going to be in so much trouble.

"Where do you think you're going?" Winona asks incredulously, "Did I say you could be excused?"

With a sigh, Simon removes himself from the table, calling after his wife, "Winona, maybe Lena deserves a few moments to consider -"

"No! No, Simon, she does not!" Winona insists in a high, shrilly voice, "She does not get to speak to me that way and go unpunished! You are grounded, Lena. You will clean up this kitchen, and then you will go straight to your room, do you hear me?"

Lena scrapes off the remainders of her dinner into the garbage pail and places her dish in the sink. She is fuming on the inside, and she wants nothing more than to shout right back at her mother, but she knows her mouth has gotten her in enough trouble for one night. She hasn't been grounded..._ever_, but for some reason she doesn't even care. Murmuring under her breath, she comments, "Yes I heard you. Everyone on the block heard you."

"Excuse me?!" Winona's voice rises yet another octave and her face is turning red with anger. "I was going to say you're grounded for a week, but you know what? Let's make it a month! Keep this attitude up and it will be two months. You will go to school and to work and that is it! Do you understand?"

"Winona," Simon cuts in again, "Hon, maybe we should talk about this." He puts an arm around his wife and rubs her shoulders soothingly, "Come on, let's go sit down and have a talk." He begins to guide her into the hall towards their bedroom.

Allowing her father to take it from here, Lena turns on her heel and heads straight for the front door. She slips her feet into a pair of sneakers and walks out the door, her mother yelling after her, "Where are you going?!"

Lena thought she'd feel relief upon hearing the news that her mom isn't seriously ill, but in reality what she feels is numb. This is going to mean major changes for her family, and she doesn't know how much more change she can handle. Things with her and Paul are changing, she and Embry's relationship is changing, her friendship with Sera has become complicated, and now her mom is going to have a baby and it's almost too much! Now she's gone and gotten herself grounded, and for what? For telling her mother the truth? For saying it like it is? She hopes her dad can talk some sense into her mother. Now that she knows she's pregnant and hormonal, Lena can understand why her mom has been acting crazier than usual, but it's no excuse for treating her like a fucking doormat. Why is she so blind to all the help Lena gives her, and all the responsibilities she's taken on without complaining? The one time she complains about it, she gets herself grounded for a whole month. It's total bullshit.

Realizing she's been walking without really looking where she's going, Lena comes to a complete stop and examines her surroundings. She somehow wound up in the woods behind her house; past Cammie's cluster of bird feeders, past the little creek she used to play in as a child, and on the edge of crossing into deep-woods territory. For the first quarter-mile or so, the woods are thinned out and easy to walk through, but beyond that the forest thickens and is unsafe to venture into without a compass or knowledge of the woods. If she had kept walking blindly, she most likely would have gotten lost.

Breathing heavily from the laborious walk and the previous heated argument with her mother, Lena sinks down on a large boulder and puts her head in her hands. She doesn't regret what was said, but she does realize she's made an awful big mess of things back at home. Her parents are both going to be immensely disappointed with her, and as much as that sucks, she can't force herself to care at this very moment. In her opinion, this argument was unavoidable. If it hadn't happened tonight, it would have happened some other night, because there was only so much she could take from her mom without snapping. Apparently tonight she reached her breaking point, and there's no going back now.

"Lena?"

It probably should have scared her, hearing a voice say her name in the middle of the woods when it is beginning to get dark out, but for some reason she isn't startled.

"You all right?"

She lifts her head and meets his gaze with a defiant look of her own, not even acknowledging his shirtless body since she is so disgusted with him. How dare he act concerned for her after the shit storm he created? Hasn't he caused enough grief for her in one weekend? What more does he want?

"I'm not in the mood for your games, Paul," Lena tells him, staring past his left shoulder as she refuses to look him in the face for any longer than she needs to.

Paul frowns at his imprint's sudden coldness towards him and wonders what he's done since yesterday afternoon when she told Kim she needed to talk to him. What changed her mind? Since he can't exactly tell her he was eavesdropping on her conversation, he decides to caution, "You shouldn't be in the woods alone. It's not safe."

Lena scoffs, "Oh, yeah, it's really unsafe out here, isn't it? That's why our parents let us play back here as kids, right? Because they were actually trying to get rid of us. I should have known. It makes so much sense now."

Put off by her sarcasm, Paul isn't sure what to say. He wracks his brain for a possible reason she could be mad at him, but he's drawing a blank. Yeah, he kissed her on Friday, but she didn't seem too mad about it then. She didn't seem too mad about it yesterday, either, when she was admitting to Kim how confused her feelings were. Surely she hadn't changed her mind so quickly, without even discussing things with him first.

Confused as to why he's still hovering nearby, Lena points out, "You know, I don't need a chaperone."

"I know," Paul agrees. "But at least let me walk you home."

Crossing her arms and refusing to get to her feet, Lena states, "I don't want to go home."

"Why not?" Paul wonders, but when he sees Lena clench her jaw and turn her head away, he knows she's not going to give him an answer. "Do you...want to come to my place? My dad's not home yet."

Turning her narrowed brown eyes on him, she says in disgust, "Ew. No! What the hell's your problem?" Does he really think she's that much of a slut? That she'd really allow him to take her home in a vulnerable state and-and have his way with her? After he literally just slept with her friend two nights ago? Not a snowball's chance in hell that's gonna happen!

"Nothing," Paul replies, feeling defensive all of a sudden, "What's yours?"

"Everything!" Lena counters, spilling more than she wanted to in one long breath, "You. Sera. Embry. My mom. My dad. This _baby._ God, everything is just so fucked up!"

"Baby?" Paul repeats, his mind racing. Is she trying to tell him she's pregnant with Embry's baby? Because that really would be fucked up.

"Yeah," Lena murmurs, "I was right. About my mom?" She reminds him of what she told him last week, about how she suspected her mom is pregnant. "She is pregnant. And I'm grounded - for a month - because I wasn't fucking happy about it." She shrugs uncaringly, but her eyes give away her true emotions: she's upset, and Paul doesn't like to see her that way.

"Really? I'm sorry, Lena," Paul says sincerely.

"Yeah, sure," Lena sounds unconvinced. "Why do you even care?"

"I do care," Paul insists. "What makes you think I don't? We're friends...right?" Suddenly, he's not so sure anymore.

"I don't know," Lena accuses, "Are we? I thought we were, but..." She shakes her head, "Friends don't _kiss_ their friends, Paul. And they don't go and screw their so-called friend's friend the same fucking night! So, to be honest, I don't know what we are. Everything is just really messed up right now and I don't know what you want from me."

"Wait, what?" Paul frowns in utter confusion, "Screw - what? You think I slept with _Sera?_" Where the fuck did she get such a crazy idea from? Did Kim tell her that? Why would she do that?

"Well, yeah," Lena says, getting to her feet and pacing the ground in front of the rock she'd been perched on, "I _know _you did. Don't try and deny it. Kim and I watched you both come out of your house yesterday, so I really don't need you to lie about it. And before you get any ideas, I don't care, all right? I just wish you hadn't put me in such an awkward position. I don't even know what I should say to Sera at this point. And Embry doesn't want me anywhere near you, so I shouldn't even be talking to you right now."

It takes Paul a full minute to comprehend what Lena is saying, and when he finally does he's so mad he almost phases on the spot. Thankfully, he manages to keep it together long enough to claim, "Lena, I didn't sleep with Sera, I swear. You have to believe me. I would never lie to you about that."

Lena turns quickly in his direction and yells, "I don't believe you! I have no reason to. I don't even know why I'm talking to you right now. I promised Embry that I would stay away, and I plan on keeping my word. All right? So just stay away from me, Paul. I don't care that you kissed me on Friday. It was stupid. It was a mistake. You shouldn't have done it, and now you've screwed everything up. We're not friends anymore. You know why? Because we can't be! Because Embry doesn't trust you anymore, and honestly, I don't think that I do either. I don't know what you were thinking, but I'm not some dumb, desperate slut that's going to break up with her boyfriend just to sleep with you because you're fucking hot! Get over yourself! You can't just do whatever you want to! Life doesn't work that way. There are always consequences. Always." She takes a step away from him when she sees how badly he's shaking. She realizes she's shaking too, and she feels sick to her stomach. With tears in her eyes, she begs, "So, please Paul, just leave me alone."

She walks away from him, in the direction of her house, and when she chances a glance over her shoulder, she sees that he's gone.

* * *

Author's Note: Sorry...please don't hate me for this chapter! I promise I'll update again in a few days! Until then, please review! Let me know what you thought and what you want to happen next :) I always appreciate your suggestions.


	19. Chapter 19

Thanks for sticking around for Chapter 19! I finally made it to over **100 reviews**! That's awesome :)

To my Reviewers: Blissangel91494, Guest, SuckerForDelena, jace4ever, &amp; Imprint obsessed - Thanks for taking the time to comment, I really appreciate it! :) I decided to do some personal responses this time, which is something I've not really done much in the past. But you guys left some awesome reviews, so I thought - what the heck? Why not?

Blissangel91494: Thanks. Glad you can understand where Lena is coming from. She's finally starting to resent her parents' high expectations of her. Hope you like the update.

Guest: Paul isn't the brightest, but he's not dumb enough to hook up when Sera when he knows where his heart lies. (I'm cheesy, I know) I think you're the first person to say you feel most bad for Paul right now, haha, but I agree with you, he's not having an easy time at the moment. Maybe things will start to look up for him in this chapter?

SuckerForDelena: Well if last chapter made you break your silence, I might have to frustrate you more often ;) Kidding! Yeah, I couldn't make things too easy for them, sorry about that. Sera is definitely not the type to find out the guy she's interested in might be interested in her friend and let it go easy, so you'll have to read on to see what happens...I'm sorry Embry was so infuriating and Lena was so willing to follow his orders. She's definitely confused and more than a little bit stubborn, but I hope she redeems herself soon! I will try and take your advice, hope you like this update though, and thanks for your review!

jace4ever: Mhm, Lena is showing a bit of a different, more stubborn side to herself lately. She's not exactly handling things with a level-head. I don't think she has seen the similarity yet between herself and her mother, but when she does realize, I don't think she's going to like the comparison. As to the rest of your questions, you'll have to read and find out ;) I don't want to give anything too big away. Thanks for your review!

Imprint obsessed: I'm sorry, but glad you understand :) Hope you like this update, and thanks for your review!

* * *

**The Heart Wants What It Wants**

**19\. Liar, Liar, House of Fire**

At the very beginning of second period English on Monday morning, Lena sits down at her chosen desk next to Kim. The moment she places her notebook and folder on the desktop, Kim leans across the narrow aisle that separates their two desks, questioning in a hushed tone, "So? How'd it go? Did you ever talk to Paul? Or Embry? I called your cell a few times last night but you never answered."

"I'm grounded. My parents took my phone 'until further notice'," Lena quotes with a shake of her head, still feeling bitter about her punishment. When she returned home last night after attempting to cool off, her dad was waiting to have a talk with her in the den, and to take away her cell phone. While her dad was much calmer and more reasonable than her mother, she was still grounded 'until further notice', which she optimistically hoped meant would be less than the month her mother threatened. Another plus: she got out of cleaning the kitchen since apparently Forrest had offered.

"What?" Kim queries, "Why?"

"Oh, it's stupid," Lena replies, "I got into an argument with my mom and she grounded me."

Kim frowns as that doesn't sound like something Lena would do, but refrains from asking too many questions about it. Everyone has a bad day now and again, and Mrs. Fawling is really tough on Lena. Instead, she redirects Lena to her original topic, "So you didn't talk to either of them?"

"No, I did," Lena corrects, keeping an eye on the time since she has less than a minute before the late bell rings and class begins, "I talked to Embry on Saturday, after you went home. I told him what happened, and he took it much...better than I expected. He isn't mad at me, but he asked me to stay away from -" She drops her voice to an even lower decimal when she says his name, "- _Paul._ I told him I would."

"He's in half your classes, including this one," Kim reminds her, skeptical that Embry's request is even possible, "He lives next door. You guys are friends."

"No, we're not," Lena protests quickly, "Trust me Kim, we're not friends. None of this would have happened if we were."

"Then..." Kim asks slowly, "What would you call it?"

"I don't know," Lena denies impatiently. She squirms in her seat when she sees Paul finally walk through the door into the classroom, just seconds before the late bell rings loudly. He takes a seat in the last row of the first aisle, closest to the door and the furthest available seat from Lena. "Why are you bugging me about this?"

"Because," Kim whispers as Mrs. Welling makes her way to the front of the classroom, "I think you should have talked to him first."

"I did," Lena hisses back, "Last night."

Kim's onyx eyes widen and she nods encouragingly, but Mrs. Welling announces, "Good morning, class. I hope you all did the reading over the weekend. We have a lot to talk about today."

Kim raises her eyebrows and mouths to Lena, "Later."

After class is over, Kim follows Lena to the hallway, intent on discovering what she and Paul talked about last night, only Embry is waiting right outside the classroom door to walk Lena to her next class. They have Trig together, but Kim knows that's not why Embry showed up to walk with Lena, and it's not because he was pulling a sweet gesture either. It's because he knows Lena just had class with Paul, and he wants to ensure they don't have a chance to speak with one another. He's probably feeling insecure, and maybe even a little jealous, if Kim had to guess. She doesn't blame him, but she does think forbidding Lena to talk to Paul is a bit extreme. What happens if they share a shift at the Market together? Or if they get assigned to work on a project together in class? What if Lena decides she doesn't want to stop being friends with Paul all because of one little kiss? Will Embry break up with her? Kim thinks Lena really needs to consider these possibilities.

Accepting that she can't talk with her now, Kim tells Lena, "I'll see you at lunch."

Lena nods, taking Embry's extended hand and tugging him in the direction of her locker. Paul hasn't left Mrs. Welling's classroom yet, and she wants to beat him to their lockers, if he's stopping there, and get to her and Embry's next class without an awkward encounter. Unfortunately, Lena doesn't get what she wants, and sees Paul is already at his locker by the time she and Embry reach hers. How did he slip past her without her noticing? She glances at Embry out of the corner of her eye before reaching for her locker and entering the combination. As she's opening her locker, Paul slams his shut and takes off in the opposite direction. Lena winces involuntarily, grateful Embry didn't take notice. She trades her English supplies for her Trig book, notebook, and folder, and closes her locker. When she turns to Embry, she sees him glaring at Paul's back.

"Asshole," He mutters, shaking his head.

Pursing her lips, Lena says nothing. She leads the way to the math hallway, and Embry follows. She tries not to think about how awful Chemistry is going to be this afternoon, since it's the one class she shares with both Embry and Paul. What's worse is that their teacher, Mr. Briggs, has yet to assign them lab partners for the year, and she's now worried what that outcome will be. They have their first Chemistry Lab this Friday, so Mr. Briggs plans to inform them who their partner will be on Thursday. With her luck lately, she is almost positive she's going to be stuck with Paul.

**.**

The period before lunch, Lena has French with Sera. She hadn't seen her yet today and she never called her back on Saturday, so she's not surprised when Sera sniffs the air and pretends to give her the cold shoulder. When Lena sits down next to her and says 'hi', Sera raises her eyebrows and asks with a dramatic flare, "Who? Me? Are you talking to me?"

"I'm sorry I never called you back this weekend," Lena says right away, "I'm grounded. My parents took my phone. I saw that you called, but I couldn't call you back. So what's up?"

"Grounded?" Sera is surprised, "Wow. Lena, I can't believe you're finally turning into a bad girl."

"I am not," Lena rolls her eyes.

"Well, I called because I was over Paul's and I got bored," Sera finally divulges, "He was still sleeping, so I thought maybe I'd go over and hang out with you until he woke up, but you didn't answer. So I had to entertain myself for a few hours." She stares down at her pink polished nails and pretends she's not as excited as she really is to see Lena's reaction to her words. She's been waiting all weekend to tell Lena she slept over Paul's house Friday. Now she can finally find out if Paul's feelings are reciprocated or if Lena is actually as in love with Embry as she claims to be.

"You stayed over Paul's on Friday?" Lena asks curiously, knowing Sera is fishing for a reaction. Clearly Sera doesn't know that Lena and Kim were watching from her kitchen window when she left Paul's house. She has probably been bursting with anticipation to tell _someone _about her hook-up with Paul. Lena really wishes that person didn't have to be her.

Smirking smugly, Sera nods, "Uh-huh. It's about time, right?"

"Yeah," Lena tells her friend what she wants to hear, "Really. So...how was it?" She inwardly cringes at her stupid question. _Why the fuck did I ask her that? _

"Amazing," Sera gushes, "Mind-blowing. Unforgettable. Where should I start?" She is really getting into character now, and noting how pale Lena is looking, she'd say her performance is going swimmingly. She knows she should probably feel bad for lying to one of her best friends, but she's too blinded by jealousy to think clearly right now. She doesn't understand how Paul could want Lena instead of her, when she's hotter and infinitely more available! She's taller, curvier, has a great rack, and knows how to apply makeup. What does Paul see in Lena aside from her conveniently living next door and 'accidentally' flashing him her tits a couple weeks ago? She knows Lena has a pretty face, and she's fit, and she probably looks good naked, but Sera knows she looks better. And she's not a goody two-shoes, like Lena, who doesn't know how to have a good time. Paul would hate being with someone like Lena, she just knows he would. Maybe he only wants her to prove he can have her?

Lena bites her lip nervously, "I don't kn-"

Thankfully, the late bell rings then, and Lena is saved once more from a conversation she's not ready to have yet by the start of class. Unfortunately, her luck runs out when the TV is turned on and a French DVD is popped in. Sera scoots her chair closer to Lena's as the lights are flicked off, and whispers, "Oh, I'm so glad we're watching a movie. Now I can tell you all about it."

"Me too," Lena lies, gritting her teeth.

"Okay, so," Sera begins, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively as she prepares to spill all the juicy details of her false hook-up with Paul, "Let me just start by saying that he is the most amazing kisser. Ugh, I swear, Lena, we must have made out for a good two hours before he even tried to take things any further. I've never kissed someone for so long in my life. When I finally took his shirt off and got my hands on those rock-hard muscles, I thought I was going to lose it right then and there. He is literally _perfect._" Sera watches Lena inhale deeply as she trains her eyes on the television at the front of the classroom. Smirking, Sera continues, "By the time he took my clothes off, my panties were _soaked._ I know this is going to sound cheesy, but he must have magic fingers, because the second he touched me I came so hard. I would have been embarrassed if it hadn't felt so fucking good." Lena is starting to look a bit green, and Sera briefly considers telling her friend she was only kidding but decides against it. "You will not believe the size of his dick. Biggest cock I've ever seen; no lie. When I popped it out of his boxers, I'm pretty sure I gasped out loud. I mean, it was long, but it was also _thick!_ I really didn't think it was going to fit inside me. But it did, thank God. I'm sure the fact that he had me so wet helped." Lena's eyes have dropped to her desk-top now, and if Sera isn't mistaken, her hands are clenched tightly around the edge of the desk and her cheeks are tinted red with anger. Sera thought it would help her wounded ego to see Lena squirm, but in reality she doesn't feel any better, and this confuses her. "Anyways, it was well worth the wait. I think he gave me three orgasms...no, _four. _I think he's ruined me for all other men. No one is ever going to be as good a fuck as he was."

Lena is totally sick to her stomach by the time Sera is finished recounting her sexual encounter with Paul. She almost couldn't sit still throughout it and had to fight the urge to tell Sera to shut up and flee the classroom, like she fled the movie theater Friday night after seeing Sera and Paul kiss. It was one thing suspecting and believing that Sera and Paul had sex, but after hearing Paul deny it so seriously, she had started having doubts. Obviously now she knows Paul is simply a pathetic liar who didn't want her to know the truth. And for what reason? He couldn't possibly have thought he had a chance with her, not knowing that she's with Embry. But...why is she so upset about this? Why does she care what happened between Paul and Sera? She has a boyfriend, and Paul is not him. She is so confused, she doesn't know what to do.

Still goading Lena for some response, Sera sighs, "I guess I'll just have to convince him to make this a regular thing, huh?"

Kristan, the girl seated in front of Lena, whips around in her seat then and hisses at Sera, "Will you shut up already?"

Once she's turned around to face the TV again, Sera sends Kristan an ugly sneer and whispers mockingly, "What's the matter, Krissy? Jealous?"

Surprising both Sera and Lena, Kristan shoots back, "Of what, Sera? Sleeping with Paul Lahote doesn't make you special. It makes you a whore."

Sera's mouth drops open in shock and anger, and she narrows her hazel eyes, darkly asking, "What did you just say to me?"

Before Kristan can twist around in her desk for the second time this class period, they are shushed from the back of the classroom. "S'il vous plaît être des filles tranquilles!" ["Please be quiet girls!"]

Sera leans back in her seat, fuming. She spends the rest of class staring at Kristan's long black braid, imagining herself cutting it off to get her revenge.

Lena, on the other hand, is almost grateful for Kristan speaking up against Sera. She said what Lena would like to think she would have said if she weren't good friends with Sera, and experiencing some sort of emotional break-down. She looks to the TV and tries to focus on the movie, but she's too distracted. She keeps hearing Paul's voice in her head, telling her what he claimed last night in the woods, "Lena, I didn't sleep with Sera, I swear." Then she blinks and sees Sera and Paul's lips crashing together. "You have to believe me," He'd pleaded. She blinks again, and this time she pictures Paul and Sera embracing, both of their clothes scattered across Paul's bedroom floor. "I would never lie to you about that," He'd promised. But he did lie. Lena closes her eyes and cringes at the vivid mental image of Paul's naked body hovering over Sera's as he enters her.

When the bell rings at the end of class, Lena couldn't be more relieved. She gathers up her French book and bolts for the door, forgetting that she and Sera both have lunch now. She walks speedily to her locker, wanting to toss her French book inside and get to the cafeteria before the line for hot lunch gets too long; today's special is French toast sticks, and Lena really wants some. When she gets to her locker though, she comes to an abrupt stop a few feet away when she sees Paul is at his, _again. _Her stomach lurches and for a moment she's afraid she's going to be sick, but the feeling passes. Instead, she finds that she's lost her appetite. She reluctantly approaches her locker and quietly opens it, keeping her stance as far from Paul's body as possible. She wants to let him know she heard all about the hook-up he denied ever happened, but she promised Embry she would keep her distance, so she clamps her jaw shut and says nothing at all.

**.**

Paul's back stiffens when he senses Lena's approach. He wants to turn his head and look at her face, but he's honestly too anxious about what her expression will hold when she sees him to move. He can feel her emotions since they are so strong, and she's not happy. He remembers too well her narrowed, angry eyes when she told him last night that she didn't believe he hadn't slept with Sera, that she didn't trust him, and that she wanted him to stay away. He doesn't want to see her look at him like that again. It was like a punch straight to the kidney; the wind was knocked right out of him. He couldn't believe Lena wouldn't even let him explain himself. She hadn't let him talk at all. She had made up her mind beforehand and left no room for him to change it. As infuriated as that made him, he was even more angered that Sera had caused this whole problem in the first place. Lena wanted to talk to him before she saw Sera and assumed the worst. Lena was willing to discuss a change between them, but Sera ruined any chance he had of that. Now he has to leave Lena alone, even though that's the last thing he wants to do, until she decides to stop being mad at him; _if _she decides to stop being mad.

When Lena makes no attempt to acknowledge his presence, Paul closes his locker and heads for the cafeteria without glancing in her direction. Jared meets up with him halfway down the hall, greeting, "Hey man, how's it going?"

"Uh, let's see," Paul replies in a sarcastic drawl, "Call thinks I'm an asshole, Lena's still pissed and not talking to me, and I have Chemistry with both of them after lunch, so I'd say things are just fucking great."

Jared claps him on the back as they stroll into the cafeteria, reassuring the other male, "She'll come around. Emily tried to stay away from Sam, remember? It didn't work."

"Yeah, well," Paul sighs defeatedly, "Maybe Sam and Emily are special."

Seeing how well Paul took his advice last time, Jared decides to keep his tip to be patient to himself, and instead guides Paul into the lunch line. They move through the line in only a few minutes and grab a seat at their usual table, closest to the emergency exit door that leads outside, just in case one of them should have the need for a quick escape. Jared looks to the double-doors of the cafeteria just in time to see Kim walk in with Lena, their heads bowed together as they share a private conversation. If he were to focus hard enough, Jared could probably hear what Lena was saying to his imprint, but he doesn't want to invade their privacy. From the look on Paul's face, Jared knows that isn't the case for him; he's definitely eavesdropping on the girls' conversation.

Jared nudges Paul's arm and says in a teasing tone, "Knock it off."

Paul tears his eyes away from Lena and replies angrily, "She thinks I slept with Sera on Friday."

"I told you it wasn't a good idea to take out her friend," Jared reminds him, "But why does she think that?"

"I don't know, that's what I was trying to figure out." Paul frowns and watches Lena cross the lunchroom with Kim and sit down at a table about twenty feet away from him and Jared, where River and Sera are already sat.

Lena purposely sits with her back to Paul, so she won't have to look at him, and she is glad when Kim sits down beside her. River smiles at Kim and Lena, greeting them with a wave since Sera is currently talking and she doesn't want to interrupt her story. For a moment, Lena tenses up because she's sure Sera is retelling the story of her and Paul's hook-up. Turns out, she's only discussing her most recent addiction to the reality show Bad Girls Club. Lena inwardly sighs in relief as she opens her small packet of syrup and dips a French toast stick in before taking a bite.

Once Sera pauses to take a breath, River leans in and informs her quietly, "Look who's staring over here."

Hearing her cousin's words, Lena pauses in chewing her food and watches as Sera's eyes flick over the top of her head before returning to River's face. "So he is," Sera agrees with a smirk, even though she knows it isn't herself that Paul is looking at. Lena forces herself to swallow and take another bite and pretend she doesn't know what they're talking about.

River, who is oblivious to the tension at the table, asks, "Did Sera tell you ladies all about her hot and steamy night with Paul?"

"Mhmm," Lena murmurs, mouth full. She swallows quickly and adds, "In graphic detail."

Kim laughs nervously and mumbles, "No. No thank you. Not interested."

Lena could kiss Kim for saying that. Of course, Sera does enjoy torturing Kim by speaking as crudely as possible, so there's no telling if they're safe from Sera's mouth just yet. River laughs at the innocent look on Kim's face and changes the subject, "Oh, and thanks for all going on a group date without me. You know, I probably could have convinced _someone _to come with me, had anyone thought to invite me."

Kim winces, not realizing River is only joking. "Sorry! I didn't even think - I feel so bad. I invited Lena and Embry because I was nervous, and Jared asked Paul and Sera along..."

"Kim," River cuts in, "I was kidding."

Paul turns to Jared, informing him darkly, "Sera told Lena we hooked up." Jared's eyebrows shoot up in surprise. Paul growls, his fists clenching, "I'm going to fucking kill her."

Noticing the tell-tale tremble, Jared suggests, "Okay buddy...maybe we should get you outside." Without waiting for a reply from Paul, he stands up and hoists his pack brother to his feet, shoving him towards the emergency exit door. Hopefully they don't draw too much attention to themselves as they leave...

A loud alarm sounds and all four girls jump in their seats at the unexpected commotion. Lena and Kim twist around in time to see Paul and Jared take off running away from the school, and they exchange a puzzled look with one another. One of the lunch attendants runs over, yelling, "You can't just leave, boys!" She sighs when she realizes they are long gone. Raising her voice over the chatter of the cafeteria full of teenagers, she questions, "Who was that? Who just left?"

Sera snickers, "Well, that was weird."

**.**

Paul never showed up in Chemistry, so Lena wouldn't have to face the awkwardness of that dilemma until tomorrow. She did wonder why he left the cafeteria so abruptly, though. It was strange, because he did that once before, last week, and both times Jared ran after him. What were those two up to? She was more curious than she cared to admit. In Art, Kim and Lena finally find a chance to talk about her chat with Paul last night, or rather, when she had yelled at him before leaving him in the woods. In hindsight, she probably could have handled that a little better. She didn't really listen to Paul's side of the story, but after hearing Sera's she wasn't sure what was left to be said. What could Paul say that wouldn't be a lie? And if he lied to her, then what was the reason for that? It was all too confusing, and Lena wasn't sure she was ready to talk about it, which is why it's a good thing Embry doesn't want her talking to Paul right now.

Tuesday, Paul isn't in school at all, and Lena tells herself it doesn't bother her because she wouldn't be talking to him anyways. But it does bother her. _Why isn't he in school? Is he sick? He can't be._

Wednesday, Paul doesn't show up either, and Lena finds herself irritated more than anything. _Why the fuck isn't he here? _Lena frowns during Chemistry Wednesday afternoon. _He's supposed to be here so I can be mad at him from across the room. When I said 'stay away from me', I didn't mean switch schools or anything. _She tells herself that if he's not in school by tomorrow, she's going to have to ask Jared what's going on with Paul.

Thursday morning, Lena watches the door to the English classroom from her desk next to Kim's, waiting for Paul to walk in and take a seat. _Come on, _She thinks as she looks at the clock and watches the seconds tick by, the late bell only half a minute away, _Come on, just show up. Please. _Almost like he could hear her thoughts, Paul walks through the door and his eyes immediately find hers. He doesn't look away until he's reached his desk and has to face the front as he sits down.

Kim glances sideways at her best friend, noticing how she relaxes in her seat the moment Paul enters the classroom. She notices how their eyes meet and seem to be saying things their mouths currently cannot. Or maybe she's been reading too many romantic novels, but she definitely witnessed a _moment._ Lena will surely deny it, so Kim won't say anything about it, for now. At some point or another though, Lena is going to have to face the music: She likes Paul. Too bad she will stubbornly fight tooth-and-nail to prove otherwise. She's too afraid of losing Embry, and even if she does build up the courage to tell Embry she has feelings for Paul, Kim thinks Lena would still be scared. It's not only Embry she'll be losing, but something safe and familiar that she's relied on all her life. Paul has known Lena a long time, but not intimately, and it's scary to open your heart up to someone new; Kim should know since she's in the same boat right now with Jared.

Lena finally feels Kim's eyes boring a hole in the side of her head and when she sees the knowing expression on Kim's face, she asks, "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Like what?" Kim shrugs innocently.

Class begins, and Lena doesn't think of interrupting Mrs. Welling's lecture to badger Kim about that look. After class, Lena expects Embry to be waiting in the hall for her, but he's not there and she walks to her locker alone. She doesn't really mind; actually, she's grateful he's finally giving up the guard dog act. After Trig, Lena has Native American Studies with Paul, who sits behind her, and she is tempted to break her silence with him. She wants to know why he wasn't in school the past couple days, and why he left lunch the way he did on Monday, but she remembers that he slept with Sera and she said some pretty nasty things to him, so she shakes her head and keeps her eyes to the front of the classroom. After French, Lena walks with Sera into the cafeteria and they both sit down at an empty table right away since they packed lunch from home. River and Kim join them a few minutes later, hot lunch trays in hand.

"Ew," Sera wrinkles up her nose in disgust, "You two actually got the tacos? Good luck digesting that mystery meat 'beef'."

"What?" River asks indignantly as she plops down next to Kim, "Are you crazy? These tacos are freaking delicious!"

"Lena," Sera points to the messy taco on River's plate and pleads, "Back me up here. Those are basically inedible."

Lena shrugs, "They're not that bad."

"Not that bad?" Sera scoffs, "You guys are the crazy ones."

Out of nowhere, Paul slides into the seat next to Sera and announces his presence with a casual, "Hey."

"Paul," Sera clutches her chest dramatically, "You scared me. What's up?"

"You've been telling people we hooked up," He bluntly accuses, not really caring if he embarrasses her in front of her friends. Lena needs to know the truth, and this is the only way she'll believe him.

Sera's cheeks darken and she attempts to play coy, "What do you mean?"

"I'm not messing around, Sera," Paul warns her, "I know you've been telling people we had sex, and you need to stop lying. Nothing happened between us, and you know it." He looks past Sera's shoulder to Lena, who is sitting beside her, and he hopes that was enough to prove his innocence. He stands up and frowns down at Sera before he walks back to his lunch.

"Ser," River breaks the silence after Paul leaves, "What is he talking about? Did you really lie?"

Lena waits for Sera to answer, as do River and Kim. Lena can't believe everything Sera told her in French class might have been a lie. She was so _detailed..._Why would she make all of that up? Sera juts her chin out defiantly and leaves the lunchroom without saying another word. Kim and Lena blink at each other in shock. River takes a giant bite of her taco before saying in a muffled voice, "I should go check on her," and taking off, taco in hand. A lunch attendant tells her she can't take food out of the cafeteria, so she shoves the rest of the taco in her mouth, claiming, "There! Happy?"

In Chemistry, Lena sits down next to Embry at the lab table they've been sharing since the first day of school. When the bell rings, Mr. Briggs immediately instructs, "All right, everyone up. Today is partner day. I know, I know, don't get too excited. It's only your assigned partner for the rest of the year. NBD, as the cool kids say." He gets a few pity chuckles from his students and smiles briefly. "Okay, first pairing..."

Lena listens closely for her name to be called.

"Embry Call," Mr. Briggs reads from off the printed chart in his hand, "with Quil Ateara."

Embry smiles at one of his best friends before heading off to his newly assigned seat with Quil, while Mr. Briggs states the next two names.

Lena allows herself to wonder for a moment if she'll be assigned to Paul for the year, as she considered at the beginning of the week, and then his name is called.

"Paul Lahote," Mr. Briggs reads off, glancing up at the boy whose name he called and searching for his female partner, "with Lena Fawling."

Embry's head snaps up from his notebook and he looks back at his girlfriend, who is looking at friggin' Paul Lahote. _What the hell? _He inwardly fumes, _How is she supposed to stay away from him when she just got assigned as his lab partner?_ Lena carries her books to her new spot before glancing at Embry with a wary expression. He shrugs at her indifferently. It's not like it's her fault Mr. Briggs assigned them to one another. His eyes narrow as he watches Paul sit down next to Lena, his proximity too close for Embry's comfort since they're sharing a lab table instead of two separate desks. He shakes his head as he returns his eyes to his Chem notebook.

Mr. Briggs walks around the classroom once everyone is seated and passes out the worksheet explaining their upcoming lab tomorrow. "Read them over with your partners," He advises, "Discuss, and then come up with your prediction as to the outcome of the lab. Tomorrow we will go over safety equipment and rules before starting the experiment."

Lena is handed two copies of the worksheet and passes one down the table to Paul. She concentrates her eyes on the paper and starts to read. Unable to focus since her thoughts are on Paul's big reveal during lunch, that he truly didn't sleep with Sera, Lena places the paper down and swivels her body in Paul's direction, hoping the movement will make him look up from his own paper. Paul's dark brown eyes flick up from his worksheet and he watches Lena expectantly as she struggles to speak.

Finally settling on, "You and Sera really didn't...?" She trails off, shaking her head but unwilling to say the words.

"No," Paul confirms.

"Why did she say that?" Lena wonders out loud.

"I don't know," Paul guesses, "Maybe because she wanted to, and I didn't." Lena arches an eyebrow in intrigue. Paul would answer her, but there's something he needs to know first, "I thought you weren't talking to me?"

"I...wasn't," Lena responds slowly, the truth spilling from her lips after seeing the slightly vulnerable look on his face, "But I was mad when I said those things to you, and I shouldn't have freaked out like that. I'm sorry I didn't believe you. I should have at least listened to you."

"I get why you didn't believe me," Paul says, forgetting why he ever thought he was mad at Lena in the first place; he couldn't be mad at her. "Especially after Leah..." He puts his elbow on the tabletop, angling his body in Lena's direction since he can feel Embry watching them from a few lab tables away. "But I told you I wouldn't lie about that, and I meant it."

Lena looks away from Paul's intense gaze, mumbling, "Stop looking at me like that." She picks up her lab worksheet once more and focuses on it while she attempts to change the subject. "I just don't get why Sera would make up such a crazy lie." Well, she did _attempt _to change the subject, her efforts simply weren't successful. "How did you find out?"

"She has a big mouth," Paul replies, obviously not elaborating that he was eavesdropping in the cafeteria on Monday. Curious now, he wonders, "What exactly did she tell you happened?"

Lena recalls Sera's graphic details about Paul and she blushes scarlet, which makes Paul even more curious. "Uhh," Lena tries to laugh off her embarrassment, "I really don't want to say."

Paul smirks, "Okay." Sera must be a pretty believable liar for Lena to be so affected by her story.

"Why didn't you?" Lena blurts out, immediately feeling stupid for asking.

"What?" It takes him a moment to figure out what she means, and then, "Oh." Why didn't he sleep with Sera? That's easy. "I wasn't into it. I'm not interested in Sera like that. And I think she figured it out, and maybe that made her mad."

Lena nods, accepting that as a possible reason Sera decided to tell everyone they slept together even when they had not. "Maybe," She agrees. "But why tell me?"

It finally dawns on Paul, "Because I guess she figured that part out too."

"What?" Lena looks at him, frowning in confusion.

Paul thinks she looks cute; the pout of her lips and the wrinkle of her nose as she tries to decipher the answer from his expression. _I didn't want Sera, _Paul doesn't say it out loud, _I want you. _But it seems like Lena might have understood anyways. Her eyes widen slightly and her lips part as realization lights up her face.

She steals a glance in Embry's direction and finds him watching her closely. She self-consciously shifts away from Paul and suggests quietly, "Maybe we should talk about this later."

"Really?" Paul's eyebrows shoot up in surprise and he quickly agrees, "Okay. When?"

"I don't know," Lena answers, feeling flustered all of a sudden, "After school? If my mom isn't home yet. I'm grounded so I'm not really supposed to go anywhere, or have any visitors."

So it isn't a definite plan, but for the first time in days Paul is hopeful. The last conversation they had ended disastrously, but this one will go better. It has to.

* * *

Author's Note: Thanks for reading! Please review, it means a lot to me! Your comments &amp; suggestions are always appreciated :)


	20. Chapter 20

Hey guys…I'm back! I sincerely apologize for taking this long to update. I had my son shortly after I posted the last chapter and then we moved and life just got in the way. I finally got back into writing this summer, but I couldn't get back into my old stories. Then, the other day, I was in a Twilight mood and of course that made me think of my babe, Paul ;) and I decided to reread this story. It took me almost the entire day to reread it, and I almost forgot how far into the story I was. I really want to try and finish it, finally. Thank you guys so, so much for reading, and if you're still hanging on and reading this chapter and giving me another chance to finish this story for you, then thank you again! I so appreciate all the new followers, and the continued reviews, and I really hope this chapter makes up for the year long wait.

Also, side-note: I may have messed up and skipped forward in months, when it mentions it is the first of October, so just to make sure you guys aren't confused, this chapter is picking up where the last one left off. I may have just skipped a week in my timeline and called it October too early, not that it makes much of a difference. I notice things like timelines when I'm reading, so I thought I'd point it out. Some people don't care, so just carry on :)

To All My Reviewers: I'm not going to write up personal review responses right now, because I don't want to make you guys wait any longer for the chapter, but just know that I really do appreciate all the feedback I have gotten. You reviewers are the best! It is seriously the biggest compliment to receive reviews on a story, so from the bottom of my heart, thanks! Hugs for all of you guys: Blissangel91494, jace4ever, hayhay196, SuckerForDelena, Imprint obsessed, Guest, HALEBTRASH, TwineTard, RobynGirlWonder93, Cindy, Geust, runs with myths, soccer-softballchick26, The Gospel of Eleanor Rigby, Jenn, Guest, Guest, Wolf9lucky, Scout out, Guest, myharlequinromance321, Khailey Egan, &amp; twilightvamps! I don't deserve you guys since I made you wait so long, but I am totally grateful! :)

* * *

The Heart Wants What It Wants

20\. Just My Humble Opinion, One That I Believe In

After Chemistry is over, Lena only has to get through one more class before the school day is done, and then she hopes she will get home to find her mother isn't there and she and Paul can talk. It's crazy how these past few days at school without him have made her miss him so much. She, of course, has been denying it, but that was also because she thought he'd slept with one of her best friends. And, yes, she's being selfish, and yes, she knows it's wrong, but she only has herself to blame this time. She assumed the worst when she saw Sera leaving Paul's house Saturday afternoon, and to protect herself from her feelings, which she isn't even ready to admit she has, she jumped the gun and talked to Embry before Paul. Talking to Embry resulted in her making a promise she knew she couldn't keep; staying away from Paul would be next to impossible, and she should never have promised not to speak to him. That was a stupid thing to do. Of course, she doesn't think Embry is stupid for feeling insecure and possibly even jealous because she had assured him he had nothing to worry about with Paul, that there was no way her neighbor had any real interest in her, and now she is discovering that may be anything but the truth.

"Lena," She hears Embry calling her distantly from down the hallway, and she realizes that after the bell rang she had sprang up from her chair and practically ran from the classroom to try and avoid the impending conversation between the two of them, "Wait up!"

Sighing in defeat, Lena slows to a stop and waits for her boyfriend to catch up to her. Guilt is gnawing at her stomach and she hates this, hates feeling this way. She doesn't know what to say to him about her behavior. "Sorry," She decides on the truth, "I didn't mean to run out on you. I just had to get away…" She doesn't clarify that it isn't Paul she was trying to get away from but _him_, and that gnawing feeling intensifies.

"It's okay," Embry forgives her easily, as always, "I can't believe your luck, getting paired up with Lahote like that. I mean, the guy lives next door, his locker is right next to yours, he's in almost all of your classes, and now you're lab partners? You just can't get a break from that ass."

He forgot that they also work together at her parents' store, but Lena isn't going to say that. She shrugs awkwardly, stating, "It's not like he planned for any of that to happen…"

"Pfft," Embry scoffs, "I honestly wouldn't put it past the guy, Lena."

"Hey…" Kim greets hesitantly, not sure if she should butt into this conversation or not, since she has an inkling it is Paul-related. She only heard the last part from Embry, but who else could he be referring to? Lena smiles in what looks like relief and Kim continues, "Are you ready for Art?"

"Yeah," Lena nods, maybe a little too enthusiastically, "Let's go." Turning her attention to the boy beside her, she squeezes his shoulder and states, "I'll see you later, all right?"

Embry nods dejectedly, feeling angry at Paul for messing up things between him and Lena. Everything was fine before that stupid kiss – perfect, even, and now he's losing her. She says he's not going to lose her, but already Embry can feel her slipping through his grasp and soon he'll be hanging on by a thread. Or maybe he's overreacting. It's too hard to tell. All he knows is this is Paul's fault and that makes him burning mad.

Once at a safe distance down the hallway, Kim asks, "How's it going with you two?"

"I don't know," Lena replies with a shake of her head, "This keeps getting more and more complicated." To further prove her point, she announces, "We got our lab partners today…mine is Paul. Embry –" She sighs, "He's not happy about it. He thinks Paul somehow planned for it to happen, but I know he didn't. How would he have done it? Bribery? Embry's just insecure, and it's making him suspicious of everything."

Kim wishes she had better advice to give, but she is far from an expert on this topic. "It'll get better," She says optimistically.

Lena wrinkles up her nose in thought, "I really hope so."

.

After his last period of the day – shop class, in which he is building a stool – Paul heads outside with Jared and watches Lena hop on her bus to go home. "So…?" Jared prompts, watching his pack-mate as he watches his imprint, "How'd it go?"

"We're supposed to talk later," Paul explains, "If her mom isn't home. But with my luck, she'll probably be there." Paul shakes his head, and then brightens up again when he recalls the way Lena looked at him in Chemistry earlier, like she finally understood he has real feelings for her. "She's not mad anymore, though, about Sera's stupid rumor."

"That's good," Jared claps his buddy on the back, "It's a start, at least."

"Yeah," Paul agrees with a sideways smile. Changing the subject, he asks, "Ready for your date with Kim tomorrow night?"

"Been ready all week," Jared admits with a chuckle. He hops in Paul's truck, as the other teen is going to drop him off at home, and then remembers the conversation he had with their alpha last night. "Did you talk to Sam yesterday?"

"Yeah," Paul shrugs, Sam always checks in with him at least once a day. He doesn't know what in particular Jared wants to know they talked about though.

"Did he tell you Billy is planning a bonfire next Saturday?" Jared explains, "He wants Jacob, Quil Ateara, and some of the others to come listen to the stories since they could phase anytime now. I'm going to ask Kim to come."

Paul realizes this will be his opportunity to bring Lena to listen to the stories, and he voices aloud, "If Lena's still grounded there's no way I'm going to be able to bring her."

"What if you talk to her dad?" Jared suggests. "You two know each other pretty well since you work for him, right? And he's lived on the rez his whole life, so he's gotta know the stories. Maybe if you tell him Billy's been trying to get the new generation to come to the story-tellings more often he'll let you bring Lena and some of her siblings."

Paul considers this option before commenting, "That just might work, dude."

"Don't sound so surprised," Jared tells him, "I have many good ideas, you just choose not to listen to them."

Paul stops at Jared's house to let him out, reminding him in a casual way, "Don't forget to shave your balls for tomorrow night."

"Shut up," Jared rolls his eyes at Paul's idiotic joke, "Kim's not like that."

"I don't know, man," Paul speculates, "From my experience, the shy ones are always the freakiest in the bedroom."

"Paul," Jared warns, serious this time, "Shut the fuck up."

"All right," Paul laughs hysterically, "Relax. See ya tomorrow."

"Yeah, yeah," Jared shoulders his backpack and slams the door shut, waving to Paul as he speeds off down the road.

Paul manages to time his drive home just right, so he is pulling in the driveway as the bus stops in front of Lena's house to let her and Forrest off. Unfortunately, no amount of well-timing could have avoided Winona Fawling standing on the front porch awaiting the arrival of her eldest daughter. Forrest steps off the bus first, Lena following with a sour look on her face that shows how unhappy she is to see her mother. She glances in Paul's direction and her expression changes to slightly less unhappy, and the smallest of smiles might even be on the curve of her lips, but that disappears when her mom calls out to her.

"Lena," Her voice is mockingly sweet, "Come on now, I have a list of things for you to do before you leave for work this evening." Winona waves a small white piece of paper in the air.

The sarcasm in Lena's reply is impossible to miss, "Gee, Mom, you really know how to make your kid's day. I _really _wanted to do some chores this afternoon. No, really, it was the first thing on my mind when I woke up this morning. I thought to myself, 'You know, I really hope Mom makes me a list of chores today'. And look at you, you did!" She snatches the list out of her mother's hand as she stomps into the house.

Paul can't help but snort in laughter, but he regrets it when Winona sends a wicked glare in his direction. He turns towards his house to avoid making eye contact and tries to pretend he didn't overhear the exchange next door as he walks to his own. His supernatural hearing allows him to hear Lena's mom mumble under her breath, "Rotten teenagers. Every fucking last one of them." Paul smirks as he unlocks his front door and lets himself inside. _Why'd she go and get knocked up again if she hates teenagers so much? She does realize that's what babies turn into, right?_

.

The first thing Lena does when she wakes up Friday morning is wonder how it can possibly be October 1st already. Where did September go? It passed in the blink of an eye. The second thing she does is groan out loud because she is still grounded and she can't use her phone, can't hang out with her friends, and is stuck home tonight on her only night off. Sunday will be even worse, since she at least has school as an escape for most of today, but Sunday she will be home with her mom to order her around all day as she pleases. It's so unfair, she could scream! Deciding not to make things any worse for herself, she drags her ass out of bed and hops in the shower before missing her opening. Then, she dresses in a pair of light-wash jeans and a long-sleeve, V-neck shirt that has thick horizontal stripes in white and navy blue. She towel dries her thick hair and then separates it evenly, straight down the middle, so that she can twist her mane in two long braids. She observes that her hair has grown at least three inches since May – the last time she did this style her braids stopped right at the top of her boobs, and now the braids fall past them. Lena applies a bit of black eyeliner to her lower lids, some mascara to her lashes, and some lip balm. She feels…refreshed this morning, and she realizes last night was the first good night of sleep she's had since last Friday.

Downstairs, Lena sees three different cereal boxes on the kitchen table, along with bowls, spoons and a gallon of whole milk. Cody and Maya are already munching on Captain Crunch and Lucky Charms, respectively. Lena chooses the last box, Frosted Flakes, which are her favorite, and she sits in her usual spot even though Forrest and Cammie are still upstairs getting ready, and her parents are nowhere in sight. It's a habit.

"Where's Dad?" Lena asks as she pours milk on top of her cereal. She doesn't ask where their mom is since she's mad at her. Besides, she's probably in bed; that's where she's been every other morning this week.

"Already left," Cody says through a mouthful of food.

"Gross," Lena replies, "but thanks."

"Mom's in her room," Maya comments after swallowing her cereal, but Lena ignores her.

Lena eats her cereal in silence. She was hoping her dad hadn't left for the Market yet so she could ask him when she'll be un-grounded. Now she'll have to wait until tonight. When Cammie comes downstairs wearing the grey and yellow uniform of the middle school cheerleaders, it takes Lena a full minute to realize what it means for her little sister to be dressed this way.

"Oh my gosh, what did I miss?" Lena asks when she finds the words she's looking for, "When did you change your mind? I thought you weren't joining the team."

Cammie grabs a bowl and sits beside Lena before divulging, "I took your advice and talked to Quinn on Monday to tell her how I felt, and she is still a little upset about it, but she told me she'd rather me be on the team than resent her for making me miss my only chance at cheerleading. I had my first practice Wednesday, and today we're wearing our uniforms to show spirit for the Homecoming game tomorrow. I'm so excited!"

Forrest marches in the room, making fun of his sister by doing an exaggerated impression of her, "Like, OMG! Cheerleading, and makeup, and cute boys!"

Lena laughs at Forrest's girlish voice, while Cammie smartly retorts, "You're trying to make me look stupid, but you're actually just making yourself look stupid."

"She's kind of right, bro," Cody comments gently, enjoying the burn on his older brother for once.

"U-G-L-Y, you ain't got no alibi," Forrest chants as he pours himself a giant bowl of Captain Crunch, "You ugly, yeah-yeah, you ugly!"

Lena is grateful for Forrest's light-hearted attitude this morning, so she thanks him for the laugh, "Aw, man, I really needed that. You probably don't need any more sugar though." Maya and Cammie giggle.

"You're crazy," Maya chuckles out, pointing at Forrest.

"Why are you guys always trying to bring me down?" Forrest jokingly complains.

Lena checks the clock on the wall above the fridge and announces, "Buses are going to be here soon. Better hurry up and finish eating."

"Yes _Mom_," Forrest teases.

Almost as if she heard her name, their mother walks into the room to tell her children, "Your father is taking me out to dinner tonight in Port Angeles, so I want all of you home right after school today. Everyone is to stay home, and no one is allowed to have any friends over."

"I've got cheerleading practice until 4:15," Cammie reminds her mom.

"Me too," Cody adds, "Basketball practice."

"Why does it seem like we're all grounded, and not just Lena?" Forrest asks the question they're all wondering.

"Watch yourself, Forrest," Winona warns, not bothering to explain any further that she is the parent and they'll do what she says. "You two can go to your practice, of course, but you come home right after."

"Okay Mom," Cammie and Cody chime at the same time.

"I hear someone's bus coming up the street," Winona points a finger towards the kitchen window, "Better get going. Have a good day."

Cammie takes one more bite of cereal before hopping up, grabbing her backpack, and racing out the door; it is her bus and she doesn't want to miss it. Lena puts her bowl as well as Cammie's into the dishwasher after giving them a rinse. She walks down the hall to put her black high-tops on, and in the time it takes her to lace up her shoes, Forrest has finished eating and gone outside to wait for the bus to arrive. Lena takes her backpack from the hook, calls goodbye to her younger siblings, and joins Forrest outside.

Unexpectedly, Forrest turns to Lena and suggests with a hint of annoyance, "Why don't you just apologize to her? You know that's what she wants, right? For you to tell her you were wrong and you're happy she's having a baby, and you'll listen to her from now on." He holds his arms out in a wide shrug, "I know you're not used to being wrong, Miss Smartie-Pants, but anytime you're facing off with Mom you're going to be the loser. That's just how it is."

"It's easy for you to say that, Forrest," Lena tries to explain her side, "because all of your responsibilities seem to fall on my shoulders, and as long as I do them, Mom doesn't seem to care." She can hear the bus rumbling in approach before she can see it. "As long as I meet her ridiculous expectations of me, then everything is just peachy, but the second I fall short I'm a big, giant fuck-up. Like, everything that I've worked so hard to achieve means absolutely nothing to her. I'm so sick of being treated unfairly and being told to just accept it. I'm not going to accept it, all right? If that means I'm grounded until I graduate, then that is fine with me."

Forrest doesn't have time to reply before the bus has squeaked to a stop and the doors are creaking open, so Lena gets on and sits towards the back of the bus. Forrest never realized how much pressure Lena was feeling, and now he feels bad for free-loading off her for so long. She always did his chores without complaining, so he thought she didn't mind, but obviously he was being selfish; why would she want extra chores when he didn't even want to do them? He resolves to start pulling his weight more around the house so Lena isn't so stressed. Maybe that will help mend the rift between his oldest sister and their mom.

.

School passes quickly, especially for a Friday, and even though Lena didn't get an opportunity to talk to Paul about anything more serious than school-work she felt content knowing that they would be having a conversation in the near future and it would hopefully clear some things up between them. On the other hand, things between Lena and Embry were awkward and they weren't sure how to navigate in this territory since things had always come so naturally to them. It was guiltily that Lena admitted to herself she was kind of relieved to be grounded tonight since Friday nights were often date-nights for she and Embry, and that was something she wasn't sure she could handle tonight. What would she say to him if he brought up Paul and that kiss again? What if he brought up his own insecurities or asked for reassurances she couldn't give him? How did things get so complicated? _Oh…_ Lena realizes, _that's right: Paul._ But she can't exactly place all the blame on him.

It would seem like tonight could be the perfect opportunity for her to sneak away and talk to Paul, what with her parents being out on a date-night for a minimum of three to four hours, but she's not sure it's going to be so easy. She might be in charge of her siblings, but that's four people she'd have to either distract or bribe not to rat her out to their parents. Maya is known for blabbing secrets, so she can't be trusted right off the bat. Cammie could probably be trusted to keep a secret without bribery, but she already decided last weekend she didn't want to involve Cammie in her drama. She drops the idea, for now. An opportunity will arise, and when it does, she will take it.

What she does take advantage of, after her parents leave the house a few minutes after four, is the cordless phone that hangs on the wall in the kitchen. She grabs it and hides in the downstairs bathroom to call Kim while she gets ready for her date with Jared. Only Forrest and Maya are home at this point; Forrest went upstairs to his and Cody's room, probably to play on his computer, and Lena told Maya she could have the TV in the den to herself until Cody gets home from basketball practice.

"Hello?" Kim answers, possibly unsure if it is Lena calling since it's the house phone and not her cell.

"Hey, it's me," Lena replies, "My parents just left for dinner."

"Oh, I'm so glad," Kim enthuses, "I really need your help deciding what to wear. Jared is going to be here in twenty minutes!"

"Did you find out where he's taking you?" Lena asks, since earlier Kim had said she didn't know where they were eating and Sera insisted she had to know in order to choose an outfit. Then, of course, Kim began worrying she'd wear the wrong thing and the whole date would be ruined. Lena promised her she was being ridiculous, but Kim was still stressing out.

"Yeah, it's a seafood restaurant about thirty minutes away, he said." Kim is also nervous about that, "I don't really like seafood, but he said it was his favorite, so I didn't want to complain."

"Okay," Lena takes hold of the situation, since Kim is going to turn this minor thing into a major one if she doesn't, "Well just because it's a seafood restaurant doesn't mean that's all they have. Usually they have steak and burgers or at least salad. You'll find something you like, and then next time tell him your favorite is Italian; they have fish there too, so you'll both be happy." Kim laughs, and Lena continues, "I think you should wear your red sundress, the one with the black polka dots, and then that black sweater of yours with the one button at the collar? That would be really cute. Or, sweet with a bit of sexy, as Sera would say."

"I think that's too tame to be a Sera saying," Kim says, opening her closet to pull out the dress and sweater Lena suggested. She holds them up in front of the mirror and asks, "Are you sure it's not too much to wear a dress?"

"No," Lena reassures her, "Wear your black flats, or your black low-tops if you want to keep it a little more casual. I really think you're overthinking it. You're going to look great no matter what."

"Thanks Lena," Kim comments, "What would I do without you? I should go so I can change and fix my hair, but I really wish I could call you later and tell you all about it. Maybe if your parents aren't home yet by eight you could call again? I have to be home by eight, so…" Kim trails off in embarrassment at her early curfew.

"I'll try," Lena agrees. "Have so much fun, Kimmy!"

Lena hangs up and walks out of the bathroom to put the phone back, forgetting that she was supposed to be discreet. Forrest is in the kitchen getting a snack and calls out, "Busted! Ooh, I'm telling."

Lena rolls her eyes, "You would tell. I was just talking to Kim. Give me a friggin' break, Forrest."

"I was kidding," Forrest says after shoving a potato chip in his mouth, "You really thought I'd tell Mom on you? What am I, eight years old?"

"Well, thanks," Lena says, still feeling skeptical that Forrest might store this information away for a later date and use it as blackmail. One phone call isn't really much to blackmail with though, so she's probably safe.

.

Paul is taking the earlier patrol shift tonight, since Jared is on his date with Kim, so at half-past 7pm he heads out back and shifts into wolf form. It has been two months now since Paul first phased, and it is finally becoming natural to him to switch back and forth between his two selves. In the beginning, it was surreal, but Sam had told him it would get easier and he's glad his alpha was correct. After gaining wolf paws, Paul cuts through the woods behind Lena's house heading for the border of La Push, which he will follow to make sure there is no trace of the vampires that don't belong. Thus far, he hasn't encountered a Cold One on their land, but he still expects to at any moment.

Paul hears a small gasp and realizes he hadn't gone deep enough into the woods, and now one of Lena's sisters is staring at him in shock and awe, only a hint of fear on her surprised face. She is holding a bag of birdseeds limply in her left hand and her mouth is hanging open slightly as she tries to process what she's seeing; which is Paul's giant silver wolf towering over her only a few feet away. She is glued to the ground in a complete stupor.

"Oh," Cammie breathes out a few moments later, coming to her senses enough to stumble backwards a few steps, "Oh my…" She doesn't take her eyes off the incredible creature standing before her, and even though in the back of her mind she knows she should be scared, she isn't. She is simply in awe of the great, beautiful thing, and this moment solidifies in her mind what she has known for years: she really and truly wants to be a veterinarian who works with wild animals, not just house pets. That is, if she doesn't get mauled and murdered by this wolf. "Nice wolf…" Cammie says in a soothing voice, holding out her right arm to keep the animal at bay if it does decide to lunge for her throat, "…good wolf. You're not going to hurt me, are you?"

Surprisingly, to Camille at least, the wolf seems to bow its head as if in agreeance before turning and leaping into the woods and out of sight. Cammie clutches her bag of birdseed tightly as she twists around and runs for her house. She has to tell Lena and Maya that she saw the wolf they've heard howling at night and he is incredible and amazing!

Paul, on the other hand, beats himself up for letting Lena's sister see him. He's glad she wasn't scared, because he'd never hurt her or anyone from the rez, but he doesn't think she should feel so at home in the woods. The Cullens live just outside the border of La Push in Forks, and that's too close for comfort. Other vampires could be lurking nearby, and he'd feel a lot better if Lena and her family would stay out of the forest. Unfortunately, Lena doesn't think there's any danger in the woods, and until he can tell her about his shape-shifting ability and the truth of the Cold Ones, there's no reason for her to believe she should stay far from the woods. He'll have to tell Sam that Cammie saw him, just so there are no surprises when rumors start about giant wolves prowling La Push.

.

The following Friday, after another torturous week of being grounded, Lena decides enough is enough and when her father gets home from the Market she marches straight downstairs to speak with him about lifting her punishment.

Simon is about to sit down with a nice cold beer in front of the television when his eldest daughter steps into the room and clears her throat. He sighs as he sits, knowing where this conversation is headed before a single word is spoke. Habitually, he quips, "What's the word, Lena-bird?"

"We need to talk about…" Lena hesitates, trying to gain confidence for her request, "me being grounded. You said 'until further notice', and I'm just wondering if you know when that might be? It's been two weeks. I understand that I was being disrespectful, but I really don't think this punishment is fair when all I did was state my opinion. I'm sorry for talking back and for walking out, but I'm not apologizing for the way I feel." Lena bites her lip and waits with bated breath for her dad's response.

Simon sips his beer, pretending to consider Lena's words while he peruses the sport channels for something suitable to watch. "Thanks for the apology," Simon says slowly, "Although, it's probably Mom you owe that too, so I'll let you tell her yourself." He pauses to take another swig from his bottle. "Tomorrow, your punishment ends tomorrow. After your shift, Paul is bringing you, Forrest and Camille to a bonfire down at First Beach." He sits back in his chair and turns up the volume, expecting the conversation to be over.

"Wait." Lena wrinkles up her forehead in confusion, thinking she heard her dad wrong. "What?"

"Billy Black's gathering some of the teenagers to tell them of the Quileute legends," Simon replies shortly, "And I thought you and your brother and sister should go and learn about your heritage. You haven't been since you were kids. Now will you get out of here so I can drink my one beer in peace before your mother makes me come to bed? Go be grounded for one more night," He winks to signify he's only joking with his words.

Lena leans over her dad's armchair to squeeze him in a tight hug and smack a kiss on his cheek, "Thanks Daddy! I love you."

"Love you too, bird," Simon says with a smile.

Lena bounds up the stairs two at a time and flops down on her bed, face-first. She feels like the reigns have been loosened and sweet, sweet freedom is only one night away. This was the longest she's ever been grounded, and it feels so nice to know it's almost over. She knows she told Forrest she'd stay grounded until she graduates just to prove a point, but she was only kidding and really hopes she won't be confined to school, work and the house again for a very long time. She rolls over and smiles up at the ceiling.

Then, she gets up to close her curtains so she can change into her pajamas, since the sooner she goes to sleep the sooner she can wake up. But she sees something unexpected that makes her slip on her sneakers and run outside; Cammie is walking into the pitch-dark woods by herself. Lena manages to go unnoticed past her father as she lets herself out the back door, and then she silently follows the path her sister took into the woods. She hears Cammie's voice in the distance and wonders who she could be talking to. Lena passes through the clearing where Cammie's birdfeeders are set up and further into the woods before she sees her sister standing only feet away from a massive silver wolf, and the younger girl is reaching her hand out as if to pet it!

"Cammie!" Lena screeches in horror, grabbing her sister by the shoulders and pulling her back, away from the beast. She shields her sister's body with her own as she yells at the wolf, "Go away! Get out of here! Go!"

Cammie is struggling against her, protesting, "No, no, stop it!"

Lena didn't actually think the wild wolf would listen to her, but she is surprised when she opens her eyes – which she'd been squeezing shut because she didn't want the last thing she saw before she died to be a wolf's jaw opening wide to rip off her face with its teeth – and the wolf is gone! She pants deeply, hand over her chest as she catches her breath and her heart stops pounding so loudly in her ears. When the shock wears off slightly, she grabs Cammie by the hand and starts dragging her back towards the house, chiding, "What the hell were you thinking? Are you trying to get yourself killed?"

"No," Cammie whines, sounding much younger than thirteen at the moment, "Why did you do that, Lena? You scared him! He wasn't going to hurt me, he wasn't!"

Lena can't believe what she's hearing, and stops to look Cammie in the eyes as she tells her sternly, "Don't you ever do that again! Do you hear me? Do you know what Mom and Dad would do if something happened to you? I know you love animals, Cam, but you can't assume a wild animal is going to trust you. You can't pet a wolf! Or a bear, or a friggin' lion! You just can't, okay? Promise me you won't ever do that again. Promise!"

"Okay," Cammie reluctantly agrees, "Okay. I promise." But deep down she knows that if she sees that silver wolf again, she is going to make him her friend.

* * *

There you have it, the long-awaited chapter 20 of The Heart Wants What It Wants! That was 10 pages, I wanted to make it nice and long for you guys. Sorry there were no actual Paulena moments in this one and it feels somewhat like a filler, but next chapter will be the bonfire and lots of Paul/Lena moments! I already started it and have two pages written, so you can expect to be reading it within the week (sooner, if I finish before that), and I really want to finish up the story for you guys as soon as possible. I'm thinking another 5-8 chapters, but probably no more than that. We'll see ;) I'd also like to finish up my other imprint fics, because (OF COURSE, this always happens to me) I have a really good idea for another Paul/OC story, but I can't start it unless I finish this one! So don't let me guys, okay? ;)


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